Restitution
by Sinmora
Summary: Emma and Regina are caught in a dreamscape accidentally caused by their infant daughter. In attempt to pull them out of it, their friends make the situation far more complex than they imagined. Established SQ and RB. Sequel to The Long Game.
1. Whoops

So, this is story is slightly different than my normal style. Not quite so angsty. Enjoy, my doves, and hold on because we are in unchartered territory. Let's see if I can pull us out of this hole before continuing to the fourth season.

Song: Timber by Pitbull and Ke$ha

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><p>Regina Swan. Emma Swan. Ruby Lucas. Belle French. Bloody fucking heroes, all of them. The first with the magical strength to heal mortal wounds if only she waded through her own anger to unleash that power. The second broken beyond the repairs of science and magic yet so noble and self-sacrificing of heart and soul that she rushed straight into the den of a serial killer to save two women she barely remembered. The third so strong that she broke through iron shackles and a magical enchantment to avenge her True Love's murder. The fourth so forgiving and loyal that she returned to save the people who betrayed her and marry the woman who tried to rape her.<p>

All of them heroes. All of them noble. All of them who gave past her heart's capacity. All of them willing and ready to die for a just cause. And they needed her. They needed her just one more time. And the next one more time she received their phone call, she knew she'd come running just one more time. Just one more time she'd stand at their door with a bag of rudimentary medical equipment. Just one more time she'd take a deep, steady breath as she rang the doorbell. Just one more time… until the next one more time.

"I hate all of you," Eva muttered as she jarred from her circular thoughts and pushed past Ruby into the Swan-Lucas mansion and stomped up the steps to the foyer. Ruby scratched the back of her head and closed the door softly, unsure of exactly what happened but hoping Eva helped. She loathed asking the nearly unhinged surgeon for her assistance so soon after recovering Lauren, but they had no other option.

"Thank you for coming, Eva," Belle said graciously from the top of the stairs after putting Annabel down for the night. They honestly needed to discuss her powers before she hurt someone. She descended the stairs, feeling much better after cleaning the dried blood from her body and changing into a pair of Ruby's baggy shorts and an oversized t-shirt. She literally surrounded herself in her lover. She'd been away from home far too long.

Eva grunted and stomped into the living room, practically ignoring the former princess. Not only had she just gotten her lover back after being held captive for two weeks, but she'd spent the better part of the evening saving Amelia Shepherd's life again. Everyone who touched these four women ended up in intensive care or dead, it was unavoidable. She herself was reminded of that fact every time she glanced in the mirror, the scars from her burns impossible to disguise or hide. Not only was she incapable of physical contact but now suffered the pitying whispers of her colleagues or the horrified stares of children.

"How long have they been like this?" She asked, sitting cautiously on the coffee table before touching either of the unconscious women and opening a bag between her feet.

"We called you straight away, so like half an hour?" Ruby answered the soul seer without taking her eyes from the shorter woman. It was impossible not to stare when they'd just survived what they had, not even her bandaged fingers and torso hurt when Belle was in her arms.

Ruby leaned against the frame of the door and accepted Belle's weight against her side, wrapping her arms protectively around her belly. The librarian grinned up at her fiancée despite the serious circumstances. They remained silent, taking a moment to seek the warmth of comfort in their partner while Eva checked their life signs.

"They seem fine." Eva said absently. "Blood pressure is normal, pulse is strong. And they simply passed out after Annabel used magic?" She asked as she shined a pen light into their eyes, testing their pupil response. She honestly feared that child. She was powerful, unmatched in raw strength, and her shenanigans became more and more elaborate as her mind grew and developed.

Belle nodded and relinquished her hold on the strong wolf who had saved her life only a few hours ago. She held her elbows and stepped beside the irritated soul seer. Ruby followed. Eva glanced up at Belle first and then at Ruby on the other side of her. With a deep breath, she closed her eyes and touched Emma's knee.

"They're active," she whispered ominously, but neither woman asked for an elaboration. Eva pulled her hand back. "Very active," she reiterated, straining to read the different emotions and intentions.

"What the hell does that mean, Eva?" Ruby demanded, irritated and exhausted. Her life was a bloody rollercoaster, and she wanted off. An hour ago as she looked at her twin pups on an ultrasound picture, she thought nothing capable of bringing her down and now she wanted to hide in her bed for a week with nothing to eat but her gorgeous, pregnant fiancée.

"It means that you were right to call me. It seems Annabel has thrown them into some sort of dreamscape," Eva sniped back at the huffy wolf, just as exhausted and irritated as her friend. Eva never directly strove for heroics, but she stepped up when asked and it led to a shit sandwich tossed into her life at every turn.

"Can you reverse it?" Belle asked much more patiently than she felt. She'd been in Storybrooke for 14 hours and had already been abducted, emotionally tortured, watched Ruby tortured, possibly died, healed miraculously by Emma and Regina's True Love connection, and seen their children on a computer screen. It was too much, and tears burned her eyes. Fucking hormones.

"I can try, but I'm going to need some time," Eva assured them confidently and removed her jacket. "It's much easier to induce a dreamscape then to worm into one already created by a foreign magic. The psyche is delicate, so I'll try and go into Emma's first. Her memories are already scrambled." She scientific coldness of her plan scathed against Ruby's patience.

"Wait," Ruby demanded, hands hovering just over Eva's but not quite touching the other woman. "Will this hurt her?"

"Better Emma than Regina," Eva reasoned. "Her memories are intact. No sense in creating two bumbling idiots, especially one as powerful as Regina Swan. Emma can become as angry as she wishes, no one will get burnt crispy… again," she added bitterly, consciously avoiding her scars. She'd not had time to make peace with them, probably never would on some level, and blamed them.

"Do it," Belle encouraged. They'd bring Emma back one way or the other, but first, they had to get them out of this dreamscape or whatever Annabel had done to them.

"Belle," Ruby exclaimed incredulously. "No, absolutely not. We already lost her once. You weren't here. You have no idea what it's going to do to Regina if something goes wrong and she loses her all over again. I won't agree to that," Ruby laid out her case, large eyes silently pleading with her counterpart not to challenge it. The insinuation cut Belle straight through her freshly healed heart.

"Do it, Eva," Belle stated more softly. She knew exactly what she asked of the soul seer. "This is on me if something goes wrong. I'm making this decision," she spoke to Eva, but her eyes stayed fixed the wolf's. She still needed to be the voice of reason, even if Ruby wasn't capable of that yet.

"Belle, no. Eva, don't you touch her," Ruby threatened, her hand outstretched dangerously.

"Children, we are running out of time. If they go too far in, I won't be able to bring them out," the surgeon chided the bickering couple. They'd be okay. They always were, it seemed, but she needed them to come to resolution faster than normal.

"What if they're already in too deep?" Ruby asked, not giving up easily.

"Well, we won't know until I go in," Eva snapped and then sighed in frustration, rubbing the bridge of her nose emphatically. If she'd not suffered from a headache before she arrived, she certainly obtained one after. How any of them functioned without a permanent one shocked the hell out of her.

"Ruby," Belle whispered. "I know what you've gone through the past two months must have been horrible, but Eva needs to do this. You heard her, Sweetheart. If they go in too far, we may never get them back. No one is controlling this dreamscape." Belle's heart broke for the accident she inadvertently caused by fleeing Storybrooke. She wanted to hold Ruby, to fix it, but that took more time than they had at the moment.

"Belle, am I taking control of this or not?" Eva asked when the silence and staring contest stretched longer than it should have, like the other two communicated without words.

"Do it," Belle ordered hoarsely, her emotions belying her coldness towards the decision.

Eva nodded and closed her eyes, both hands hovering over Emma's knees. She hadn't the time or patience to step into the middle of the constant domestic conflict that surrounded the two women. Sucking a steadying breath, she lowered them to The Savior's body. Belle winced along side the soul seer, knowing how much human contact hurt their friend. She'd done something similar after Regina woke up after having surgery, took her pain to ensure she'd not become a zombie after Emma brought her back from the dead. Eva hated them right now, but she'd always come.

Belle held herself tighter. Ruby knelt and studied Eva's face, holding her breath, waiting impatiently for any sort of news of their friends' conditions. Eva winced again, chest heaving with the effort of pushing into Emma's mind, her soul. An inordinate amount of time passed. Belle dug nails into her elbows, praying and hoping that Eva was as skilled and powerful as she thought. Ruby alternated between glaring at her lover and studying Eva's contorted grimace.

"Okay, I'm in," she whispered to the other two women. If she opened her eyes, the two worlds would have collided, and she wanted to focus solely on Emma for the moment. "Are you okay?" Ruby's brow furrowed at the question. She actually spoke with Emma? Eva shuddered, fingers clenching at Emma's knees as her breathing elevated dramatically.

"As far as I can tell, Annabel put you and Regina into a dreamscape. I'm trying to figure out how to get you out of it. Just sit tight, okay?" She reassured the seemingly shaken savior as best she could.

She gasped and jerked bodily without breaking contact with Emma, almost like she ducked from something flying. "It's okay. They can't physically harm you," she said, voice trembling at whatever she witnessed within the other woman's mind. "Still scary as hell, though," she muttered to herself.

The doorbell rang, and Belle rolled her eyes. "I've got it," she murmured and slipped from the living room. She was useless anyway until Eva pulled them out of whatever hell they'd fallen into. A very contrite-looking Bethany stood on the stoop wringing her hands sheepishly.

"Belle," she rasped and cleared her throat. She opened her mouth to speak again, but nothing came out so she clamped it shut.

Belle offered a sympathetic smile and stepped forward to pull her sister in a light hug. "It's okay."

Bethany's eyes slipped shut as emotions she'd thought long-dead bubbled to the surface. "I know he's dead, but I was afraid to stay in my apartment alone. Granny has Marco over. I didn't know where else to go," she explained, her voice quivering with real fear and overwhelming emotions of a crisis passing. Bethany wasn't used to it like they were.

"It's okay," Belle comforted the teenager. "Come on." She pulled back and wrapped an arm around Bethany's thin shoulders, directing her inside. "We've a small crisis, but you're always welcome here."

Bethany smiled, her icy blue eyes shimmering with unshed tears. Her big sister had truly come home, survived a psychopath, and handed out unconditional and healthy amounts of forgiveness like souvenir gifts. She was amazing. "Thank you, Belle."

"You're family, Bethany. No thanks necessary," Belle said meaningfully and led her towards the living room. "Unfortunately, we have a little situation," she continued as they came upon Eva looking ragged and ready to topple over while Ruby watched helplessly at the surgeon's side.

"Okay, Emma, I need you to take my hands. I'm going to try and bring you out with me," Eva explained. Sweat beaded on her forehead, and her face flushed with the effort of maintaining contact with the spirit world. Soul work required far more energy than anyone imagined.

Eva wavered, barely catching herself before she fell over on the table. Ruby stabilized her with strong hands on her shoulders, reacting instinctively. A sudden blast of energy knocked the wolf to the floor and the table tipped backwards. Eva landed hard, air smashed from her lungs with the turbulent landing, legs still in the air over the side of the table. She rubbed the bridge of her nose.

"I really do hate all of you," she muttered.

"Ruby?" Belle rushed to her lover's side when the wolf failed to move. She hadn't been hit hard enough to knock her unconscious. She touched her cheek gently and smiled when those beautiful brown eyes cracked slowly.

"Hey, are you alright, Sweetheart?" Tears burned her eyes and she wiped at them furiously. Her heart and hormones couldn't take much more tonight. She jerked Ruby's shirt up, checking her wounds.

The confusion in her wolf's eyes frightened her. "Belle, did it work? How did I get on the floor?" Ruby asked and rubbed her temple like her head ached. "Did I get hit in the stomach?" She groaned and rasped a string of questions.

"Some type of magic blasted you when you touched Eva. I was making sure the cut on your stomach hadn't torn open. Don't you remember?" Belle explain, dread growing in her heart. Her actions led to Emma's amnesia, she'd not tolerate something similar from her lover. "Ruby, are you okay?"

"Yeah, I feel fine, Belle," Ruby laughed and shoved her away gently, oddly for the wolf, as she sat up. "You hit your noggin, too? Can't remember my name? God, you smell like peanut butter," Ruby complained, covering her mouth and nose, waving Belle away melodramatically.

"What?" Belle and Eva asked in unison, two sets of eyes comically widened.

"How much peanut butter did you eat, woman? It's like seeping from your pores or something, like peanut butter vodka," the wolf continued, pushing herself across the floor to distance her nose from the obnoxious odor of peanut butter surrounding the librarian.

"What did you mean when you said she couldn't remember your name?" Eva asked apprehensively as she slowly righted herself with Bethany's assistance of pulling the table away from her legs rather than touching her. The girl looked as confused and mortified as the other two women. Emma and Regina lay against each other, unconscious on the sofa.

"Ow!" Ruby yelled and glared down at her bandaged fingers. "You called me Ruby. My name is Emma. I do remember that much at least," Ruby's voice informed them absently as she studied the foreign yet familiar hand attached to her body. Chocolate brown eyes finally glanced up and took in the horror and confusion of the other three women. Something was very wrong here. With a glance down her own body, Emma's heart jolted into a frantic rhythm. Something was very, very wrong here. The thin, lanky frame, the bandaged hands, the softer voice, the brown and red hair, the sudden super sniffer attached to her face.

Finally, her eyes landed on her slumped form on the sofa, her body but not her soul trapped within. It shifted, rousing from the dreamscape that her biological daughter shoved her into by accident, presumably. Her green eyes opened and immediately locked with the wide brown eyes of the person inhabiting her body.

"Are you fucking kidding me!" Emma and Ruby's voices yelled in unison, declaring the exact same thoughts of the other three.


	2. Welcome to the Jungle

Welcome back to so many old faces! And some new ones I noticed during The Color Red. Thank you for your reviews and continued support.

Enjoy!

Song: Welcome to the Jungle by Guns N' Roses

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><p>Emma poked herself on the cheek. "This is not happening," she muttered and scrubbed a hand over her face. "Ow! Goddamn it, Ruby!" She glared first at the bandaged fingers and then at the woman inhabiting her body. The woman looked possessed, yelling at herself, but Ruby wasn't in Ruby's body.<p>

"Yes, because I asked the psychopath to rip my fingernails off," Ruby in Emma's body sniped, sounding like the savior but cocking her hips and crossing her arms like the wolf.

"Okay, alright, enough!" Belle yelled. Ruby…er, Emma grabbed her super sensitive ears and doubled over, still adjusting to Ruby's heightened senses.

"Don't do that," she hissed. "I'm not used to pervert ears yet."

"Really? Pervert ears?" Ruby asked with Emma's voice and glared at her supposed best friend. "I cannot help my hearing, and I really wish I had it back."

"Yes, pervert ears. I'm pretty sure I could hear Amelia having sex at her house with these things. How the hell do you not go nuts?" Emma bitched without uncovering her ears. Ruby opened her mouth to answer, but Emma continued. "Not to mention you super perverted nose. I can smell Eva's sweat and Belle's… peanut butter vodka pores." The poor woman not only remembered very little of her life but was now housed in a foreign body. She handled it rather swimmingly, considering.

"I was born with it, Emma," the blonde haired woman soothed and rubbed the wolf's shoulders. "I'll help you learn how to deal with the overload on your senses, okay? Until then, maybe we can get you some cotton balls so you can hear normally." The other three women simply watched in fascination. They knew that Eva needed to pull Regina out of the dreamscape, but watching Emma console herself and Ruby yell at herself like a madwoman was far too amusing.

"Emma, Ruby," Eva started, brow furrowing with the confusion of instinctively looking at the proper body associated with the name. "We'll fix this, but right now I have to bring Regina out of this dreamscape."

"Okay, doc," Emma agreed from Ruby's mouth and picked up the coffee table. It creaked and groaned and scratched the hardwood floor when she set it down with more force then necessary.

"Holy mother of god!" She stared at her hands, smile growing a mile wide. "Rubes, oh man, how are you not like spiderman-ing your way into town everyday?"

"No, Emma," Ruby commanded, but the woman in the wolf's body had already leapt over the back of the sofa and taken off towards the stairs. "Emma!" Ruby in the blonde's body sprinted after her, not nearly as fast or agile in the normal human body.

A muffled "Oh my god, how do you run anywhere with these tits?" exclamation in Emma's voice echoed off the walls.

"At least I have more than mosquito bites," Emma shot back. "How does Belle find your nipples?"

"I'm naturally thin, you asshat," Ruby shouted, not even slightly amused by the barb towards her lanky body.

"Emma Swan, Ruby Lucas, you are going to wake the children!" Belle yelled after them, stomping into the foyer with her bare feet smacking in lieu of her normal heel taps.

Bethany covered her face and giggled while Eva rolled her eyes and sat next to Regina on the sofa, intent on finishing the job. How these four bumbling idiots got anything done in a day was beyond her understanding. Yet, here she was making sure they all turned out alright. A fool, she was. "Of course, I switch the two most powerful and immature women in Storybrooke," she muttered, and Bethany uncovered her eyes in order to make eye contact and nod at the frustrated surgeon.

She stepped into the foyer in her high heels in time to watch Ruby's body grab a banister and vault onto the stairs with Emma's body scrambling to follow. The second Ruby got close, Emma levered over the railing and trusted the wolf's body to not bust when she hit the foyer floor 20 feet below.

"Emma, don't!" Ruby called.

The Savior hit the floor and tumbled onto it. The cut on her leg busted from the strain and immediately soaked through the wolf's jeans that she had yet to change after they returned home from the hospital. A growl of frustration tore from Ruby's throat, straining Emma's vocal cords as she descended down the stairs and stalked towards her own body now bleeding again.

"I'm sorry, Rubes. I forgot you cut your leg. You don't feel much pain unless you do something to aggravate it, do you?" Emma asked from the floor. How many injuries have gone undocumented because Ruby couldn't feel them due to her wolf's strength?

Ruby knelt beside her friend in her body and grabbed the tear in the jeans, pulling at the strong denim. "How the hell do you save anything with your puny arms?" She sniped, struggling just to get the fabric open enough to see the wound.

"Excuse you," Emma exclaimed, offended more than she should have been. "My arms are amazing, much more defined than these stick-thin things you have."

"And yet, you don't go jumping off balconies in your body," Ruby deadpanned, the expression and gestures odd on The Savior's face and body.

"Enough!" Eva called from the living room. "Regina is waking up."

"Shit," Emma and Ruby muttered together.

"Ruby, please go make sure Regina doesn't accidentally blow something up," Belle gently urged, trying her damnedest to remain calm. She actually looked forward to Regina's commanding presence.

"Baby, you like my nipples, right?" Ruby in Emma's body asked Belle seriously, wide green eyes not quite built for the wounded puppy expression Ruby conveyed.

Belle touched Emma's cheek tenderly, feeling more than a little odd about the gentle caress on her friend's face while comforting her lover. "Your nipples and arms are perfect, Ruby," she managed with a straight face. Body swapping? No problem. Playful insult to her body? Total melt down.

Ruby crossed Emma's arms smugly and grinned cheekily at the woman currently in her body. She jerked, surprised by Emma's moderately-sized chest inhibiting the gesture, at least two cup sizes larger than hers and at least one or two smaller than Regina and Belle. She cupped them, weighing each. "These are really nice, though," she complimented.

Emma squeaked and slapped her hands away. "Hands off, ya perv!" Belle rolled her eyes and growled in frustration as she pulled Ruby up by ear, much to Emma's chagrin, and dragged her to the living room to wait for Regina to fully wake up and returned to Ruby's bleeding body. Things were about to get very confusing.

Bethany knelt on the other side of Emma and held back the sides of the hole to give Belle room to inspect the wound. "You're an idiot," she chided the woman inside her fiancée's body. "Ruby is a wolf. She is not impervious to pain or permanent injury. If you ever pull an idiotic stunt like that again, I will give you a sleeping curse until we figure out this mess. Do you understand me?"

Would Regina or Belle have to kiss her in order to awaken her? Emma almost blurted out the silly hypothetical, but the cold glare barely concealing shredded nerves and frayed emotions in her friend's watery blue eyes killed any thought of it. Belle barely held herself together long enough to get Regina awake. They had, after all, only narrowly escaped death not more than a few hours before the body swap. She and Ruby were being incredibly insensitive to Belle's frazzled mental state. Welcome back to Storybrooke, glad to have you back here's a serial killer for your amusement.

"I'm sorry, Belle. I really didn't mean to hurt Ruby," Emma apologized sincerely, not considering the emotional and mental ramifications of Belle seeing her partner injured once more before she acted on her stupid impulses. The scent of peanut butter invaded her nostrils again, and Emma gagged. "Seriously, I'm never going to be able to eat peanut butter again. Please just… go over there. This will be fine until Eva can switch us back. It doesn't hurt that much, just a little sting."

"I suppose if you're bleeding you may refrain from acting like a complete imbecile," Belle acquiesced far more easily than Emma anticipated. She more than anyone knew what Ruby's body was capable of withstanding, but Emma suspected the coldness was a defense mechanism. She stomped towards the living room, leaving Bethany to help Emma to her feet. She leaned on Belle's little sister and followed at much more reserved pace than her initial sprint into the foyer and obediently sat on the sofa to watch her wife wake up from that horrible place.

Ruby knelt in front of Regina, touching her knees lightly as the sorceress came to a bit more groggily than Emma. "Emma," she breathed and touched her wife's face.

"Actually," Ruby countered, practically vibrating in place. She knew they'd find a way to put them back into the right body, but her excitement to tell her best friend about their current predicament swelled and crashed in giddy energy in her chest. "I'm Ruby, Mama Bear."

"Excuse me?" Regina snapped, eyes suddenly wide and sharp despite the pounding in her head. The dark undertone in Regina's voice killed any levity they may have found in the situation. Like popping a balloon, the resounding pop of Regina's irritation echoed in their ears and left them all speechless.

"Finally, someone taking this as seriously as I am," Belle huffed and crossed her arms over her chest, sympathetic eyes on Regina's serious face.

"Belle? This is true?" Regina asked the only person she trusted not to lie to her. The librarian nodded, overcome with emotions now that she needn't be the only adult in the room. Without preamble, she burst into sobbing, dramatic wails that Emma struggled not to laugh at because of the sudden and unexpected and unnecessary nature of them. Belle was going to struggle with pregnancy hormones worse than any of them, and she suddenly wished not to be in Ruby's body.

"Hey," Bethany surprised the hell out of all of them when she stood from her perch beside Emma and wrapped her sister into an emotional hug. "I will not stop until I find the literature that reveals the cure to this," she promised in her uptight, regal way. Bethany was as fucked up as the rest of them, but she loved her sister. Belle allowed the taller woman to hold her close, absorb her tears on the expensive dress shirt.

"Baby," Ruby said, but Emma's voice came out, sounding all wrong for the moment, and Belle sobbed harder.

"Bookworm, may Bethany escort you to the kitchen? You've had enough stress for one day," Regina took control of the situation while allowing the younger woman to retain power of her own decision. She'd become quite protective of the suddenly hypersensitive little sister she'd never really had, one who understood her royalty quirks and sometimes seemingly cold demeanor. Belle nodded against her sister's neck and allowed the woman to lead her away from the insanity that was her reality.

"Belle," Ruby whined and moved to follow her, but Regina's clawed hand on her arm thwarted that desire quickly. She dutifully followed Regina's steady finger and joined Emma in her body on the other sofa.

"Eva, have you any idea how to fix this?" Regina asked as she pinched the bridge of her nose, fighting the headache that lingered much longer than Emma's because of Ruby's wolf.

"I'm not certain. I've never seen anything like it before. I can only assume the close connection of your souls played a part in the switch. I'm not certain there is precedence for this," Eva explained calmly, ever the nerves of a surgeon despite her own emotional upheaval at the situation. This could not mean anything good.

"Who knows of this incident?" Regina asked next, confusing all of them.

"The four of you, me, and Bethany," Eva answered methodically, searching for Regina's meaning without being obvious.

"Let's keep it that way, shall we?" Regina suggested, but her tone basically set down a rule.

"Oh come on, Babe, Amelia would get a kick out of this," Emma protested with Ruby's voice. Regina held up a hand, halting the childish protest.

"Ru… Emma, Darling, you know as well as I that we have many enemies who would love an opportunity such as this to exploit our family again. I will not stand for it. You will simply have to cope until we find a solution," Regina pontificated, leaving no room for argument, all the while rubbing at her temples.

"Regina, I'll get you something for your head," Eva said quietly, leaving the head of council to lay down the law as she saw fit to the two women sitting side by side on the sofa like two teenagers being berated for some stupid stunt.

"Belle keeps Excedrin in her top right desk drawer in the library," Emma supplied, having retrieved it for her friend many times.

"Sooo, you're saying that Emma and I have to pretend to be each other in public?" Ruby clarified, wanting all the facts before agreeing to Regina's demands.

"And in the presence of our children. They've been through enough." Regina stared her down, daring her to challenge her wishes.

"Regina, I have a thousand things to do. I have to reorganize the diner opening and cook the new menu. Emma can't do that stuff. Half that recipes are in my head. I didn't write them down," Ruby protested. "Not to mention. I am so not okay with her kissing Belle every time they say goodbye."

"We'll sort details later, Wolf Pup. Right now, this is how it has to be," Regina stated a little more gently. Her best friend had only gotten her lover back, and now this fiasco separated them once more.

"What about Katy? She's smart. She's going to know something is up," Emma tossed out as casually as possible.

Regina sighed heavily. "You needn't interact with her, Emma. She is under the impression that Ruby will never speak to her again."

"What about me?" Ruby seethed. "I don't want to see or speak to her again. That little bit…"

"Enough!" Regina yelled, coming to her feet at the pending insult threatening to be hurled at her daughter. Her chest heaved, emotion vein throbbing wildly. "Grow up. She was abused and manipulated and left vulnerable by our failures. I understand your anger. I feel it myself. Nothing stings like the betrayal of family, but we will not abandon her like everyone…" Regina pressed her temples again, losing steam for her rant when it edged too close to a truth that still freshly branded her heart. So much of herself reflected in the girl she'd been charged with protecting. She made some mistakes, and everyone abandoned her. No matter how much she ached, she determined her daughter should not suffer such a fate.

"Just deal with it," she commanded and stomped into the foyer, leaving the two swapped companions in silence in the now empty living room.

"Well, we blew that one," Emma commented and leaned back, suddenly too exhausted to move.

"She doesn't trust Katy," Ruby theorized quietly and joined her friend in a defeated slouch. It was the truth, but Regina found it easier to blame herself than Katy for her actions. Ruby wasn't so blinded. That girl knew exactly what she was doing, and the few heroic acts that helped them pull it all out of the crapper only went so far in repairing that damage.

"None of us trust Katy. That's not the point. Regina's not wrong," Emma defended her wife while validating Ruby's feelings of betrayal.

"I know," Ruby admitted begrudgingly. "Come on, let's go fix my leg," she changed the subject, too raw to even discuss the situation with her niece any further.

"Easy for you to say when you're not the one feeling the pain," Emma bitched and allowed the wolf to pull her to her feet with a small grunt.

"Welcome to the jungle," Ruby muttered and supported the other woman in her own body. She really was fucking skinny, she thought as she slipped an arm around her tiny waist and protruding ribs. Almost sickly so, she'd lost so much weight during Belle's two month long adventure into the world.

"Kn-kn-kn-kn-kn-kn-kn-kn-knees, knees," Emma answered, horribly impersonating Axl Rose without her own vocal cords.


	3. Family Shreds

Thank you all so much for the reviews and follows. This one took a little angst turn, but it was needed to get us on the road to recovery for our lovely ladies. Any particular funny scenes you care to see Ruby and Emma get into… this is supposed to be fun after all, and I am open to suggestions because I know where I'm going, just haven't figured out how to get there yet.

Song: I Won't Give Up by Jason Mraz

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><p>"Thank you, Eva. Give Lauren our love," Regina said genially as she escorted the exhausted soul seer to the edge of the stoop.<p>

"Of course," the surgeon offered, not really willing to play with small talk, not that she ever had.

"Eva," the queen pulled her attention once more, barely bothered by the icy glare and crossed arms. The surgeon had been through the ringer the past few weeks. They all had, and Annabel's little stunt did little to help that stress slip away into post-battle jitters.

She smiled kindly, wishing more than anything to reach out to the woman. "None of us would be here without you and Lauren. You saved Annabel's life. You were the first person to hold her in this world, Eva. That means far more to me, to us, than…" The words caught in her throat, and Regina smiled sheepishly.

"You're welcome, Regina," she said softly. "You may be the only one who still inspires my respect. You're not reckless for the sake of it," the surgeon grated through clenched teeth. The other three followed impulses, even Belle, the supposed levelheaded heroine who saved her town from destruction completely disappointed her by taking off as she had. She understood, of course, but her disappearance only exacerbated the situation.

"I'll find a way to heal your scars, Eva. Emma and I healed Belle. It's in me. I just…" She smiled self-consciously. "I simply have to find it."

"You're lost, Regina. It's okay," Eva encouraged the confused former evil soul standing before her. Regina gasped, slightly surprised by the insightful observation of her emotional and mental state. Eva smiled sadly, the scars on her cheek and neck stretching painfully with the expression.

"I'm lost, too. I've spent so many years denying my gift and then denying people when my powers were no longer dismissible. I love and hate the four of your for making me realize that my existence meant very little without someone to share it with me. I'm sorry for attacking your girl, but…" Eva shrugged, eyes dropping to the stones at their feet.

"Lauren gave you another chance?" Regina fished for understanding.

"Just as Emma gave you one. I've watched you change. I've felt it in your soul. You're not that person anymore, but you've reinvented yourself based on your union with Sheriff Swan and now…" Eva shrugged, hugging her bag closer to her stomach. She and Regina had shared this odd bond since Emma got shot. Somehow, she had free passes to say such thing to the former queen where others risked a fireball at their heads.

"Now, I'm uncertain of who I am," Regina finished sadly but not really surprised, like she already knew what she feared in her heart. "I thought I'd found my way in Boston. That's the happiest I ever remember being in my entire life."

"Perhaps it's best if you return?" Eva suggested, and Regina recoiled at the insinuation.

"I will not leave Katy. She's been cursed and cannot cross the boundary without consequence," Regina stated vehemently.

"As I said, I regret attacking her in such a way," the surgeon eased the tension subtly, in her own quiet way.

"Damn it, Ruby!" Emma yelled. Something crashed within the house, and Regina sighed heavily.

"I married a child." She scratched her forehead and sighed again. "Don't worry about Katy. She's resilient, and she's agreed to counseling with Astrid. We just need to figure out how to help her."

Eva nodded solemnly. "I tried once. Suicide, I mean," she confided. "I was a young soul seer, my parents hadn't a clue how to help me. Their touch brought pain… regret. I'm uncertain if they regretted me or the fact that I was born a seer." She shook her head and laughed self-consciously. "My point: I never wanted to die, I wanted the pain to stop. Just love her, Regina. It's enough. You don't need a grand gesture or some life-altering insight. Just love her, and as long as she keeps talking, she'll be okay."

Regina sniffed and wiped discreetly at her watery eye. Eva almost mimicked the gesture, and they laughed awkwardly, both unaccustomed to sharing so much emotion. Surprising the former royal, the seer pulled her into a brief hug. It was warm and inviting, nothing like the rigid touches Eva mostly offered.

"I'll figure out how to make the idiots right again," she vowed as she pulled back.

"Thank you, Eva." Regina reluctantly let her go, knowing her own selfish desire to remain in the embrace harmed her friend. "For everything."

Eva shrugged and pulled her coat tighter around her throat. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight," Regina returned and retreated hastily towards the warmth of the house. Her pajamas barely blocked the wind from her body, and she took a moment to shiver heat into her muscles before ascending the steps into the foyer.

Her wife and best friend battled for dominance in the middle of the floor. Without a second thought, she waved her hand, freezing both before Emma tore open Ruby's wounds and Ruby bumped Emma's head. Idiots. They fell in love with idiots. She barely looked at them before entering the kitchen to find Belle seated at the island with Bethany at the stove turning off the kettle. A piece of raw salmon laid in pieces in the middle of the floor, and Regina raised an eyebrow at it.

"Ruby slapped Emma with a piece of fish. Apparently, the scent lingers for days which is why she refuses to make it at the diner," Belle offered explanation in an exhausted tone that reflected Regina's own feelings.

Regina chuckled despite her best judgment and lowered herself to a stool beside her friend. "Is that what sparked the wrestling match in the foyer?"

Belle rolled her eyes as she sipped a cup of tea. Bethany answered the question, "They finally remembered that they usually shared a bed with another person and began arguing about sleeping arrangements." She sat a cup of tea by Regina's hand. "Chamomile."

"Thank you, Miss French." Regina and Belle shared a look over their cups, remembering a time when Regina referred to her as nothing else. They'd come so far.

She touched her stomach and smiled coyly. "Ruby and I discussed names while we were held captive," came the almost casual remark. What had it said about their lives that talking about baby names in captivity felt like normal conversation? When else were they going to do it?

Regina covered her hand over her belly. "I suppose, you'll have to think of a few more. I can't believe you're having twins." The thought brought a genuine smile to her lips. Ruby was many things, but a bad mother wasn't one of them. The past two months proved that much at least. Alex came out on the other side of this with minimal scarring, much less than her own daughter.

"I have a few in mind," Belle said almost cryptically and smiled at her friend. "How long do you intend to leave them frozen?" Followed the admission. Regina retracted her hand with an elegant wave towards the foyer and sipped her tea, ever poised and elegant.

"Until I no longer feel irritated with them." She grinned wickedly around her mug. "Do you wish me to unfreeze them before you go to bed?"

Belle shrugged. "I'm introducing Bethany to The Golden Girls. Do what you want because I cannot bear their child's play any longer this night." She slid off the stool and looped her arm into her sister's.

Regina smirked and kissed the side of her head as she stood. "I'll be in the basement if you change your mind." Regina slipped out of the kitchen ahead of them, tea in hand and descended the steps slowly. She wiggled her fingers over her shoulder, reveling in the thump of Emma and Ruby unfreezing above her. Belle's firm voice echoed behind her, and the struggle stopped immediately. While the body swap concerned her, there were much larger issues in her life than the discomfort of her wife and best friend living in the wrong body for a few days. Eva would figure it out, eventually. They nearly lost Katy the first time they allowed their own problems to eclipse that of their children, and Regina demanded more of herself this time.

As she suspected, Katy laid in bed, wide awake, probably aware of everything happening upstairs. They were stupid to think they'd keep anything from her. Regina watched for a moment before knocking. The teenager held the little pendant Austin crafted for her above her face, brushing her thumb over the bumps and ridges. She covered her face a moment later, giving into her tears.

Regina ignored the polite knock she intended before entering the open door. "Katyline, sweetheart," she gently informed the trained warrior of her presence, though she probably heard her at the end of the hallway. Hyper vigilance was a symptom of PTSD, something they'd all dealt with on some level.

Regina sat her tea on the nightstand and slipped into the twin-sized bed beside the distraught girl. Katy resisted slightly when she attempted to pull her into an embrace but finally gave in and allowed Regina's arm to slip beneath her neck and over her ribs. She fisted the silk top of her adoptive mother's pajamas tightly. Regina was the only one who wasn't blatantly afraid of her, who held up her end of the deal to love her unconditionally. If Regina gave in to the idea that there was nothing worth saving within her, she truly was lost, abandoned. She'd been a fool to betray these women.

"You're not alone, Katyline," Regina murmured softly. Nothing else needed to be said. The girl cried until her hiccups became puffs of air across Regina's chest, and Regina settled into the embrace when she finally sensed that her daughter had drifted off into a fitful sleep.

"You'll never be alone," she vowed, promised, threatened… depended on the person. Emma supported her decision to help Katy, but she, too, feared the young woman. Ruby openly loathed her, and Belle had yet to weigh in on the topic. Regina determined not to give up on her and settled in for a long night of listening for the hints of nightmares until exhaustion finally took it's natural course and pulled her under beside the tortured girl in her arms.

People gave up on her and she gave up on herself so many years ago. She understood Katy on a level no one else really could. They'd all done questionable things, but not like this. Despite the harsh sting of betrayal in her heart, she empathized with the young woman more every day. She'd become another Evil Queen, locked behind walls of power and control, dehumanized because the world gave up on her. Regina remained. Regina willingly planted herself between that harsh reality as the last battlement of hope standing alone in the rising tide.

She awoke to find Katy blinking up at her quietly still wrapped firmly in her embrace. "Good morning, Sweetheart," she rasped and wiped at the sleep in her eyes.

"I've not slept through the night since Aunt Marion died," she murmured almost reverently.

Regina smiled down at her daughter and tucked strands of frizzy, dull blonde hair behind her ear. "I'll stay with you until you can," she promised. Katy's hazel eyes fluttered closed as Regina's lips pressed a tender kiss to her forehead.

"What about Emma?" She asked apprehensively, not quite believing the witch's offer. No one kept their promises.

"Emma will understand or toss a fit and recover. We've all taken our time to grieve and recover, Katyline, and now it's your turn. I'm here for you," Regina tossed out casually, like it was the most natural thing in the world. It was, to her. Her children were the only purpose in her life that continued to make sense, to give her a sense of pride and meaning, and she clung to that until she found her own way again.

"No one else has woken yet," Katy changed the subject, raising her eyes to the ceiling above them.

"I suppose that means we choose the breakfast menu," Regina whispered conspiratorially, eyes slipping closed despite her best effort to keep them open.

"Will you teach me how to make waffles?" The girl asked hesitantly, and Regina's eyes opened immediately to find the haunted and tentatively hopeful hazel of the teenager staring up at her. She smiled.

"Of course."

"Great," she exclaimed and scrambled from the tiny bed. "I'll start the coffee," she tossed over her shoulder as she slipped the tiny pendant over her head that she'd apparently held through the night and disappeared into the dark hallway. Regina rubbed at her eyes again, unable to stop the grin on her lips and rolled onto her back, muscles screaming from the awkward angle her shoulder and neck stayed in for hours.

She groaned when angry, red numbers on the nightstand glared 6:32 at her. Snagging her ice cold tea from the previous night, she followed the bouncing teen upstairs to start her day. Annabel probably wanted food anyway and Alex no doubt roused in another half an hour. When she reached the kitchen, Belle smiled up at her from the small breakfast table.

"She woke up a few minutes ago," she practically sang, clearly soothed and rested and overcome with feel good emotions to have the infant in her arms again. "Do you want to take over?" She asked as an afterthought, reluctantly.

Regina shook her head as she leaned over to kiss her daughter voraciously suckling at the bottle Belle held. "Katy and I are making waffles," the sorceress said as though it explained everything.

"Will you be using cinnamon?" Belle asked out of the blue.

"I thought I'd prepare some whipped cinnamon butter for the top," the queen answered, nose wrinkled in confusion. Belle paled, the thought of the spice bringing nausea. "Oh, it's a trigger for morning sickness." Belle nodded without looking up. "If you wish to stay a bit longer, I'll refrain from making it until everything is complete and bring your breakfast to the living room."

"Thanks." She smiled down at the tiny girl in her arms and blinked tears away. "She's so big now."

"You should hear her and Emma babble at one another," Regina said with a light tone, trying her best to keep any type of accusation from her voice, even if a part of her blamed Belle for Emma's amnesia.

"Belle, would you like some tea?" Katy asked hesitantly, awkwardly interrupting the two adults.

The librarian gave her a genuine smile. "That would be wonderful. Peppermint if we've got it." Katy nodded and filled the kettle. Belle watched her, the shy movements, the hesitation, nothing like the confident young woman she'd left.

As she and Regina moved around the kitchen, Belle watched. Regina's patience and compassion surprised her. Of all of them, she expected the pissy woman to be right beside Ruby in her hatred and desire for punishment for the young woman. Who betrayed Regina Mills and got away with it? Her daughter, apparently. It mattered very little to the former royal that girl had been in her life six months, she'd grown to love her, need her as she needed Henry and Annabel. She jerked in surprise when Katy sat a cup of tea near her elbow, jostling her from her musings.

"Katy," she murmured softly, keeping the girl in place with the soft usage of her name. Belle faltered unsure what to say. She loathed the torture wrought upon her family, some of it by this girl's own hands, but something inside of her nagged to err on the side of compassion. "There's no judgment here," she finally elaborated, defying her lover's need for justice and the anger swarming the mere mention of the girl's name in town. Belle's life was her own, and she'd just made her decision.

Her soft hazel eyes shimmered with a hint of tears, but the stoic girl nodded once, acknowledging the acceptance of her mistakes by a woman she looked up to, much like Regina. Both of them had made decisions they regretted, epitomized true darkness, evil. And, they gave her a free pass, just this once. Regina touched Katy's shoulder blades as she bent over the skillet of bacon and also nodded at Belle over her arm. Katy had two allies, she wasn't alone.

"Hey guys," Emma in Ruby's body caught their attention from the doorway. A grumpy Alex leaned over her shoulders, crying softly into the red and brown hair of the woman she believed to be her Mama Wolf. Belle jerked, barely seeing Katy as she stepped forward to take Annabel from her arms.

"Wolf, when will Mama be home?" The tiny girl hiccupped and sobbed as she had every morning for the past two months. Belle grabbed her chest at the heartbreak in her little girl's words.

"Baby, Mama's home," Belle whispered softly into her tangled blonde hair. Alex whipped around, held upright only by Ruby's wolf strength and reached for the woman. Belle accepted her weight eagerly, strong enough to hold the little body but too weak to stand. She sank to the cool tile of the kitchen, Alex on her lap, both mother and child sobbing with the joy and grief that came with their reunion.

Emma burst into tears behind Ruby… well, her body had anyway. Regina's heart ached to switch them back, to let her friend have this moment with her child and her returned lover. Nothing could have helped short of that. Emma acted quickly, though, wrapping Ruby into a smothering hug and leading her from the kitchen with the advantage of her superior strength. They finally understood how damaging their swap was to the people around them, especially those too little to understand, like Alex. She had no doubt that their childish antics continued when the heady emotions of the moment wore off, but for now, they thankfully leaned on each other far away from their children.

Regina and Katy worked around the two on the floor, finishing breakfast as unobtrusively as possible. They moved everything into the dining room on covered plates. Katy took two plates for Alex and Belle into the living room and left Annabel in her cradle in the kitchen. When she returned, she pulled Belle to her feet, letting the woman lean against her. Everything felt so surreal. The emotions were there but buried. All of them felt but none of them spoke of it.

It wasn't an uncommon feeling, not with everything they'd been through, but it felt different this time. Their family was broken, not just their bodies this time. They couldn't even eat breakfast in the same room. Regina's anger flared.

"Katy, bring those plates back in here, please," she called and grabbed the bowl of cinnamon butter she'd made not five minutes ago.

"Regina, cinnamon makes Belle sick," Ruby protested, following her friend into the kitchen.

She stopped short at the foyer door when Regina flipped her hand, opening the back door with magic and flung the bowl into the yard. She winced as the glass container with their raw cinnamon sticks that usually sat near the coffee pot followed. Cabinets clattered and banged as Regina tracked down the powdered cinnamon and any type of shaker container with it. She flung an unopened container of cinnamon rolls waiting to be baked and half an apple pie from the refrigerator. She swiped into her arms a container of hardtack candies, a box of cinnamon apple tea, and the mixture of cinnamon and sugar Henry put on his toast, and one by one each item joined the shattered glass and pile of cinnamon on the back lawn. After she'd finished her tirade, she turned to find her entire family staring at her in confusion.

"Precisely," Regina finally responded to Ruby's comment. "There is enough to deal with at the moment. I shall not allow something as frivolous as a bloody spice to separate us further. I will remove all scents and cinnamon-related objects from this house after breakfast and will force the first person to bring it back into this house to eat a spoonful of it everyday for a week. Am I understood?" Her head jerked to the side as she laid down the laws of her household.

Emma reached for her as she passed, remembered the foreign body she occupied, and dropped her hands to her side. Regina was right, of course. Regina was usually right. No one spoke as they followed the raging sorceress to the dining room. They found her pouring a glass of milk at each table setting, using magic to swirl chocolate into Henry's. Luckily, the pre-teen was braver than the rest of the heroines because he strode into the room confidently, beaming up at his mom, even in his confusion.

"Mom, why does cinnamon make Belle sick?" The boy asked innocently.

Regina smiled at her son and touched his hair tenderly. He'd grown so much. It felt like a small eternity since she'd spent any time with him. With a glance to Belle and a nod that gave her permission, Regina smiled at the boy now as tall as her. "Belle is pregnant. Twins."

"What!" He squawked, his voice reaching an octave that made Emma grab her brand new wolf ears. He rushed at his aunt and wrapped her and Alex into a hug. Belle kissed his cheek and snuggled her daughter tighter. It was a beautiful moment, a real moment, something tangible and heady, not this surreal reality they'd lived in for the past two days. Even with Emma and Ruby in the wrong body.

"They're my little brothers or sisters?" Alex asked, looking to her wolf for confirmation. Emma stepped forward and kissed Ruby's daughter.

"All yours, Little Wolf," she confirmed and squeezed Ruby's shoulder in her body. It damn near killed her not to react as Ruby would, but Emma took care of her family by wrapping them in her long, lanky arms and pressing a kiss to Alex's head.

Ruby glanced at Regina, searching for silent support from her friend. The witch smiled sadly and rubbed a hand over Katy's shoulders. "Shall we eat?" She pulled everyone through the emotional moment.

"Dibs on first bacon pick!" Emma called more loudly than necessary, breaking free from her friend's fiancée and daughter.

"In your dreams," Ruby answered with Emma's mouth and fought for control of the platter in the center of the table, distracting everyone from the heavier emotions floating about the room. They were the clowns, and their family needed that particular skill at the moment.

Henry laughed and snatched the tray, running to Regina for protection from his squabbling aunt and mother. Belle chuckled, Bethany smirked. Alex shrieked in joy from her Mama's lap, clapping her hands enthusiastically. Even Katy cracked a smile. Regina held her hands up, playfully threatening the swapped women with magic that froze them in their tracks. Henry picked out the crispiest pieces under his mother's protection and bolted to his place setting to munch them down as he prepared his waffle.

Given the circumstances, it was about as normal as things got in the Swan-Lucas household.


	4. Pieces

Thank you, my doves, for the reviews and follows. Again, open to suggestions for compromising situations for our two lovable idiots. Apparently there have been issues viewing this chapter, so I pulled it down and reposted to see it that helped. Enjoy Lovelies!

Song: Volcanic Jig by Natalie MacMaster

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><p>"Rubes," Emma whispered, glancing over her shoulder to make sure just one more time that the kitchen was in fact empty. Her own green eyes looked up at her, confused, questioning. Emma already volunteered them for kitchen clean up duty. What more could she possibly have wanted?<p>

"I have been holding it since I got up, Rubes. How do you want to work the bathroom thing?" Emma pranced, squeezing her thighs together, desperation in her eyes.

"Oh my god, me too," Ruby gushed and grabbed her own shoulder housing Emma's mind, happy that Emma brought it up first. Her face flushed with the force of her relief, and Emma studied her body's reaction to something so simple. How had she never realized it before?

"So?" Emma prompted, checking over her shoulder towards the foyer once more. She felt very comfortable with physical contact with the wolf, but this hit a whole new level of personal. "Also, you need a shower… I mean, your body… I mean, the one that I'm in."

Ruby held up her hand, bracing the other one on the counter. "Just do it. We won't talk about it or comment on weird body things or… whatever, okay?" Ruby nibbled Emma's lower lip, brow furrowed as she looked up into her own eyes conveying Emma's emotions.

"Are you sure? I mean… don't take cold showers," Emma instructed in an embarrassed mumble. "Just… especially if my body gets…" She shrugged, waving her hands in a circle, waiting for Ruby to finish the thought.

"Oh!" A blush spread on Ruby's cheeks, well Emma's. "Seriously? Cold water makes you horny?" She covered her mouth, the calluses on Emma's hands different than her own, rougher. Emma's mouth was smaller, more compact and almost permanently set into a frown. The laughed swelled and bubbled in her chest and then burst free behind her hand.

Emma rolled her eyes and crossed her arms over Ruby's chest. "I'm so glad you're amused by this," she huffed. Ruby's hips felt funny, jutting forwards like she used to do her own when she widened her stance. Everything felt wrong in this body, and she smelled and heard far more than she ever wanted. People digesting food, sweat in someone's hair across the room, Bethany's subtle perform that she'd found appealing in her own body now only made her want to gag.

"I'm sorry, Ems," Ruby managed between giggles, clearly not at all sorry.

"Right, you get a nice break. Meanwhile, I still smell the fish you hit me with last night. I'm recovering from being tortured. There's a three-year-old who thinks I'm her mother. I'm going to have to figure out how to run a diner and fool everyone in town that I'm you. You're a sheriff, a job which you've done might I add, and you have amnesia. You can pretty much just pretend you forgot anything anyone has told you. Can you at least tell me how exactly you'd like your body handled?" Emma sniped, more irritated than amused after the emotional reunion of Belle and Alex earlier that morning. That little girl had been to hell and back and deserved better than this.

"I do like it rough," Ruby mused with an innocent expression.

"Ruby!" Emma half jerked, half bobbed up and down like a whining teenager. If they failed to come to some sort of agreement soon, Ruby's bladder set to explode at any moment.

"Look, just go pee. Try not to… spend too long wiping," Ruby finally gave her an answer about something. "And don't make fun of my birthmark," she added in a mumble, but the wolf ears usually attached to her head caught every word.

"Birthmark?"

Ruby rolled her eyes and continued loading the dishwasher. "Yes, I have birthmark. It's… Just go pee before you pop, okay," she snapped, slamming the dishwasher with more force than necessary. They both winced at the clatter of dishes. Regina already broke a bunch during her tirade earlier that morning when she'd cleared the kitchen of all things cinnamon.

"Sorry, this body is weird. I haven't figured out how much strength is required for everyday tasks, and I keep overcompensating because I know how weak you are," Ruby explained far too innocently to not be making fun of her friend again.

"Seriously? Again with my so-called puny arms?" Emma huffed, more affronted by the thinly veiled insult than concerned with the need to relieve herself. "My arms are amazing! Feel them," she insisted, grabbing the bicep she'd worked so hard to get to pop just like she wanted.

"Emma, I really don't need to feel your bicep," Ruby protested, loathing the fact that Emma's body was naturally weaker than her own. She jerked in vein. "Emma, really."

"Come on, Rubes, touch it. Just fucking touch it," Emma demanded and pushed her friend against the counter, holding her own weaker body in place with strategically placed hips and strong wolf legs.

"Emma, stop. I don't want to touch your fucking bicep." Ruby pushed and grunted, struggling against her own bandaged fingers holding the hand she currently controlled against the well-muscled arm Emma so obviously took massive amount of pride in and love to show off.

"Okay, yes, it's great. Now let me up," she grumbled, squeezing the shapely arm to appease her offended friend.

"No, flex it. You can't get the full experience without flexing," Emma insisted, enjoying the super strength far too much.

"I don't want to flex your fucking bicep, you egotistical twat. Get off me."

"Ahem," Bethany cleared her throat from the door. She held six glasses in her fingers and tried not to giggle as the two separated, red-faced and disheveled. She clicked across the floor, having reclaimed her heels for propriety's sake though she wore the same clothing she'd arrived in the previous night. Luckily, Stacy had given her the following week off to be with Belle and have her surgery.

"Ruby, I know this may be a highly inconvenient time, but may I speak with you about the procedure I mentioned before?" She asked, eyes focused too acutely on the glasses she sat upon the counter to be by accident.

"Yeah, of course," Ruby squeezed her shoulder compassionately, looking very odd in Emma's body to be touching the younger French in such a manner. She and Ruby came to some sort of understanding while Granny recovered from the fire, but no one had bothered to ask for the specific details, figuring they'd share if they felt inclined to do so.

"I'm just going to… go check out that birthmark," Emma stuttered, jerking her thumb over her shoulder as she backed away from the other two and then made a hasty retreat towards the bathroom off the foyer.

"Are you adjusting?" Bethany asked, suddenly too nervous to talk about herself any longer. Ruby shrugged, crossing one arm over her stomach to hold to the opposite elbow. The gesture looked so natural on her lanky wolf body that Bethany giggled at the oddness of it on Emma's. "I'm sorry. You've got to break the habit of crossing your arms in such a manner if you wish to convince anyone that you are Emma."

Ruby dropped Emma's arms in defeat. "This is never going to work. We're too different," she whined, sounding particularly irritating with Emma's voice where it previously endeared the listener to the child-like wolf.

"Stop that," Bethany ordered. "Emma doesn't whine like that. Here," she grabbed the husky shoulders attached to the body she wore and pulled them back. "Even as younger Emma, she always held herself proud, like she had something to prove. You're very insecure in your appearance, Emma is not."

Emma's brow furrowed in a very Emma manner. At least, she'd managed that look as she pulled her shoulders back stiffly. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?" She snapped even as she followed Bethany's instructions. "And how the hell do you know all this?"

"It means that no matter how many times you've flung yourself in front of an innocent, you've never seen yourself as more than that little girl in your grandmother's cottage and the drunken waitress in a small town." Bethany sighed, pulling her own shoulders tight under the scrutiny of Ruby's suddenly intense gaze. "It's easy to observe when you're being actively ignored," she confided, almost absently, like it hadn't hurt when she realized exactly what the so-called members of her family thought of her. She'd felt disappointed at first in herself that she ever cared what they'd thought at all.

"Beth," Ruby started apologetically, but the teenager held up her hand and smiled sadly.

"We all made mistakes. I'll pay for mine in whatever way is fit to remain a part of this family." She offered a shrug and smile to emphasize the point. She truly meant it, atonement, forgiveness, penance. It all seemed so trite and so very, very wrong after everything they'd been through - to punish each other for stupid decisions. "It's hard to be alone."

"You're not alone anymore, Beth. Trust me, in the grand scheme of things, you feeding information to The Council ranks pretty damn low on the list of betrayals running amuck in this family right now," Ruby scathed, her mind on Belle's bright blue eyes as they teared up from the gunshot wound in her chest. Katy's actions led directly to that situation. She scrubbed a hand over her face, suddenly exhausted, drained.

"I did notice you," she said shyly. "Before you revealed you were Belle's sister, I mean."

"Really?" The younger French blurted, surprised and elated all at once.

"Of course I did. You ordered the peanut butter delight and a coffee to go a lot. I always wondered why you never stuck around to eat it in the diner, but I guess that makes sense now." Ruby shrugged, uncomfortable with the building emotional moment between her and Belle's younger sister. Bethany showed her true colors when Granny almost died, something her grandmother saw long before the rest of them. She never left the old woman's side. Granny showed her compassion and earned an unwavering loyalty that seemed unique to the French sisters.

"So," she cleared her throat and rinsed the glasses. "You have a date for your… thing?"

"I do. Addison… Dr. Montgomery… scheduled the procedure for this Friday morning," Bethany answered quietly, scared out of her mind. Ruby hadn't even needed her wolf hearing to catch the quiver in her voice, smell the fear wafting from the young woman.

"I'll be there," Ruby promised. "It may be in this body, but I'll be there." She smiled up at the girl as she leaned over to put the glasses in the dishwasher.

"What procedure?" Belle asked from the doorway, Alex still firmly nestled in her arms where she'd been since seeing Belle that morning. She'd even eaten breakfast on her Mama's lap. It made everyone smile until they realized the abandonment issues that had been exacerbated by Belle's abrupt flee from Storybrooke.

"I'm sorry," Belle quickly apologized. "Regina and Katy are ridding the house of cinnamon, so I've come to the only cleansed area to avoid being bombarded. She even found cinnamon-flavored toothpaste, if you can believe that."

"Henry's," Ruby said with a chuckle.

"Oh my god!" Emma blurted as she burst into the kitchen, destroying the calm moment they'd all created. "Medusa. You have Medusa on your…Alex."

"The birthmark," Belle laughed quietly.

"Yes, okay, I have a birthmark shaped like Medusa on…" She glanced at her daughter and huffed a sigh. "On my lower belly," she finished lamely and hunched her shoulders, collapsing in on herself. Bethany cleared her throat, and Ruby pulled Emma's shoulders back to stand tall instead of hiding within her hair and lanky body that no longer housed her consciousness.

Emma laughed, unable to stop until Alex turned to her Aunt Emma, or her body anyway, and asked, "Can I see your mark, Temma?"

Ruby floundered in Emma's body, mouth working with no sound sliding over her tongue. Belle saved them all, as Belle often had. "Baby, why don't you let Wolf take you upstairs and get dressed. We're going to go see Granny in a little bit. Sound good?"

"You won't leave till I get back?" She asked her mother, little arms tightening around Belle's neck and frizzy, dyed hair.

"I promise," Belle swore. "I'll never leave you again, Alexandra." She kissed her daughter's tangled blonde hair and passed her off to Emma in Ruby's body.

"Is everyone still mad at Aunt Beth?" She asked, content to be handed off but still addressing Belle with big serious, blue eyes, sensing the tension in the room. She played with the red strand in her hair as she always did and Ruby's big heart melted in Emma's chest. No wonder most people stopped to stare when she held her daughter. They truly connected in a special, unbreakable way and managed to look utterly adorable in the process.

"No, Darling," Belle soothed yet another fear. No matter what they thought of her younger sister, her daughter had grown to love her, which meant they'd tolerate whatever came next in their lives for the sake of a child who had seen more life in her three years of living than most adults. "No one is angry anymore."

"Okay," Alex said with a sassy nod as if she'd put everyone in their place. "I want to wear the dress like Mama's," she instructed Emma who grinned and nodded. They babbled about clothes as Emma took the tiny girl away from the more serious conversation floating around the kitchen. Luckily, Emma had overcome her aversion to children in the past two months since bumping her head.

"Come, we'll talk in your library," Bethany suggested in that same haughty, regal way she still used to disguise deeper emotions.

"Of course, I'll meet you there in a moment," she dismissed the younger French in the same tone, and Ruby almost chuckled at the emotionally stunted interaction, thwarted only by the knowledge of what Bethany intended to divulge during their private meeting. That poor girl needed as much help as the rest of them.

"What's up, Baby?" Ruby asked, sensing a disturbance in her fiancée.

Belle wrapped her arms around her waist and tucked into her neck, Emma's curly hair feeling so very strange in such an intimate position. Ruby wrapped Emma's stockier arms around the woman she loved. It wasn't as weird as she'd thought it would be, though she missed Belle's scent. Of course she smelled the shampoo from her shower the previous night, but Emma's nose failed to find the hint of sweetness lingering around her mouth from the syrup she consumed for breakfast, the mingling of something irreplaceably Belle with the scent of her daughter. Those were too subtle for a normal human's senses. She missed them.

"Everything will work out, Belle. We just have to figure out how to put everything back together again," she murmured and kissed dyed blonde hair.

"I know," Belle responded, more for something to say than anything else. "I love you, Ruby Lucas, even when you do stupid things like grab a soul seer in the middle of a dreamscape."

"I love you, too." They spent a moment in silence, adjusting to the emotional sensation if not the physical one of being wrapped up in one another again.

"Miss French, I do not consent to the violation of my wife's body by your hands," Regina snapped from the doorway, her tone ambiguous enough to separate the two women in fear of being parted magically.

"That will not happen, Regina," Belle assured the older woman she'd come to look up to and respect far more than she ever believed possible. Regina was becoming her anchor in this stormy sea, her one constant.

"There need to be rules placed," Regina murmured thoughtfully as she wrangled with the trash bag full of cinnamon paraphernalia, much more than she'd anticipated. "Until then, please limit your physical advances to handholding and hugs." She sounded distracted, not completely committed to the ground rule she'd just set.

"Are you alright?" Belle asked, fighting with her urge to approach the woman for fear of catching a whiff of the spice that sent her stomach roiling with a mere thought of it.

"Of course," Regina snapped and turned her back to fight with the knot she attempted to tie in the twisted plastic. She growled in frustration when it refused to cooperate, ripped open the backdoor, and chucked it over the railing. Candles and incense and plates of wax bounced over the dew wet grass, but she couldn't have mustered the mental power to care if she tried as she slammed the door, blocking out any trace of the suddenly loathed scent.

"I've only just begun recovering Emma and finding stable ground upon which to stand in my marriage that has been more of a nightmare than an actual relationship and now must bear the sight of her in the arms of another woman." Belle opened her mouth to reassure the sorceress once more, but Regina held up her hand, stopping the flow of platitudes before they began.

"That said, I imagine when I seek comfort in the arms of my wife, you'll feel much of the same jealousy and anger that I feel this instant, perhaps more considering…" She pinched the bridge of her nose as she had the previous night, and Ruby jerked, almost surging forward to steady her friend as she wavered on her feet. She needn't have finished her thought, they all knew she referenced how close she and Ruby got during their stint back in The Enchanted Forest while Emma was left behind in this realm. Their emotional affair nearly finished ripping the final thread of the Belle and Ruby's relationship apart. Strong emotions like that hadn't simply disappeared because they moved past it.

"I'll refrain from physical contact as much as possible. I've much larger issues to address than the idiocy of the heroes in my life," she seethed openly, not bothering to hide her disgust and frustration with the entire situation.

"What do you mean?" Belle queried with caution. Regina sighed heavily, her shoulders falling forward with the burden she carried.

She sighed again and scratched her forehead. "Katy and I are meeting with Astrid and Archie this afternoon for lunch. Would you mind terribly to take Annabel, Henry, and Emma with you to the diner?"

"Of course, Regina. You don't even have to ask," Belle answered when Ruby only bristled, Emma's neck glowing instantly in a bright red hue. The fact they'd managed to eat breakfast in the same room astonished her.

"Thank you," she murmured and left the kitchen without further comment or gesture. Belle stared after her for a moment. What the hell happened while she was gone?

"What is wrong with Regina?" She turned the question to her fiancée, but Ruby only shrugged.

"She's been acting pretty much hot and cold like that since Katy tried to off herself," Ruby tossed out carelessly with a shrug of her shoulders and turned back to the dishes. The echo of Belle's hand landing firmly atop marble brought her focus back to the other woman.

"If you cannot muster compassion for the girl you claimed to love unconditionally, at least find some respect for her situation. She did not try to "off herself" as you so indelicately stated. She attempted suicide, an act of desperation by a young girl who had been brutalized and emotionally tortured." The librarian's chest heaved with the burning cable of rage cutting through her heart.

"Belle."

"For months, Ruby. She was repeatedly raped, probably beaten, and brainwashed. Every time you feel anger towards her," she poked a finger into the counter, allowing her a moment to make room for the anvil about to drop into the pit of her stomach. "I want you to remember that we were the people responsible for protecting her from those things, but we were too preoccupied with our own pain, our own ambitions and frivolous interests, like becoming a tattoo artist and teaching ourselves dead languages to even notice."

"No, Belle, I will not make myself responsible for her actions. She could have come to us at any point. We were there for her. She made the decision to look us in the eye every single day and lie to us, to rip us apart from within our own ranks," Ruby fought back, not willing to relinquish a smidgen of her firm hold on the anger and blame she placed on her niece.

"Ruby, you need to try and forgive her," Belle softened slightly. She knew of course that both sides were equally right and wrong. Another thought occurred in the middle of the heated moment "What Jacob did was not because of you, Sweetheart."

"I killed Peter. I created that boy. That monster," Ruby muttered quietly as she wiped her hands on a towel. "He's right. I should have been punished a long time ago." She tossed the towel into the sink and left the room much like Regina only moments before, quiet and distant.

As weird as it felt, her stint in Emma's body offered her first real chance to actually stop and breathe for a minute since Emma got shot almost two years prior. She'd taken up the role as hero and never stopped, no one gave her the chance. As Emma, no one expected too much from the 21-year-old amnesiac. Perhaps she needed to be someone else for a little while in order to heal. The though hurt Belle's heart enough to leave the conversation unsettled for the moment and traipse to the library in defeat. She knew Ruby loved Katy, but too much anger and pain covered that emotion for the moment.

Nothing but time could change that.


	5. Walk Dis Way

Sorry about the crap with chapter 4, hopefully FF has their shit worked out now. I had to post the damn thing 4 times before it finally stayed up.

Enjoy my pretties and leave me some thoughts.

Song: Compass by Lady Antebellum

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><p>Emma stood in front of the full length mirror in the bathroom and stared at her friend's naked body. There was a freshly stitched gash along her belly and one in her leg that she'd ripped open the previous night. Dark red and blight black splotches covered her stomach, electrocution marks. The only reason Ruby hadn't required hospitalization was due to her wolf's resilience, but as she'd witnessed and experienced firsthand, Ruby felt pain. She touched the spots gingerly, wincing at the residual sting and burn from them. Ruby felt pain as any other normal human being, her wolf simply increased her tolerance of the sensation.<p>

"My god," she whispered incredulously, studying the vast amounts of scar tissue upon her friend's body. She ran a finger over a the gashes that had been stitched, much cleaner than the bumpy, raised flesh of the ones she'd left unattended. Barely an inch of her torso had been untouched by blade or arrow. Tiny holes, scratches, gashes. They'd mentioned before that she'd been invincible in Neverland, but Ruby never once uttered a word about how much each wound must have hurt, the making and healing of them.

Tears burned the back of her throat, and she turned from the mirror, not bothering to glance behind her to see the scars she felt stretching and pulling on the skin of Ruby's back. How awful to know she should have died a dozen times over, saved only by the natural strength of her wolf. Emma stepped into the hot spray of the shower, letting the water cover the silent tears trekking down her cheeks.

The finger condoms she'd slipped over the two fingers without fingernails caught and pulled at her hair, but she barely felt it. Her friend had been through hell, and by the time she stepped from the shower, Emma determined to make it just a little bit better, starting with fattening up her friend by eating an insane amount of calories while she occupied her stick figure. Brownies. Brownies everywhere.

She smirked and slipped into the room Ruby shared with Belle to find something she might feel comfortable wearing. Her good mood faltered when she found Belle on the edge of the bed crying quietly in only her bra and panties. The librarian waved her inside with one hand and wiped at her tears with the other.

"I'm sorry, Emma," she apologized quickly and pulled a shirt over her head. Emma took a moment to appreciate the changes of her body preparing for the two little lives she carried within her belly. "I suppose my clothes won't fit in a week or two," she laughed at herself lightening the mood superficially.

"Hey, I know this situation is fucked up, but Eva and Regina will figure out how to fix it," Emma assured her, comforting the only way she knew how. She barely knew this woman. She'd met her the previous night when she saved her life from a bullet wound, not having even conducted a proper conversation with her yet. She squirmed self-consciously near the closed door, unsure exactly what Belle expected. It's not as though she'd not seen Ruby's body, so no need to be shy there.

"It's not that. You and Ruby seem to find trouble in the most innocent of situations. I've grown accustomed to the constant state of worry in regards to my fiancée. Bethany informed me of some disturbing news," she explained quietly and pulled the black, sheer tights up her legs. Ruby's body jerked, and Emma looked away quickly. That was new.

"Uhh, the procedure thingy she mentioned earlier?" Emma asked, looking anywhere but the woman who still turned the one she inhabited on, apparently. Belle's musk tickled at her nose, the faint scent of her. Pheromones? Crap, Belle's pheromones turned Ruby on? Weren't human pheromones a myth? Or scientific mystery still being researched heavily? Or… Ruby was a wolf, maybe she smelled something undetectable by science?

"Emma?" The voice came from just below her, and The Savior jumped violently, smacking the door for balance as she fell backwards.

"What?" She snapped and swatted Belle's hands from her shoulders, bumping her injured fingers. "Ow! Son of a whore," Emma cursed, and Belle backed away slowly, hands up to catch her just in case.

"Emma?" Confusion filled her face and beautiful blue eyes. Emma in the wolf's body melted just a little, overcome with the urge to cup Belle's cheek, caress her scar, erase the confusion.

"Uhh, you need to go… please," Emma begged, afraid to move. Something clawed from within, something powerful, instinctual, primal. Fear grew on Belle's face where confusion previously resided.

"Ruby's wolf," she breathed. "Where is Ruby's cloak?"

"I said get out!" Emma yelled and grabbed the woman by her shoulders. The door banged off the wall, pushing the little rubber stopper through the drywall with the force of the blow. Belle stumbled onto the balcony, barely catching herself on the railing with her hands as the door slammed behind her.

"Regina!" She called over the edge, hoping the witch hadn't gone to the basement. "Regina, I need you!"

Something crashed into the wall, shattering within the room. She jerked at the knob, but Emma locked herself inside. Emma heard the rattle and pressed harder into the wall opposite the door, knowing if she opened it, the woman on the other side was going to be punched or ravished and at the point, she wasn't certain of which.

"Belle, stay out!" She yelled, her voice deeper, dangerous. One whiff of the woman sent her into a downward spiral. Arousal burned between her thighs and anger shredded the inside of her chest. Ruby's body reacted to the other woman, whether her mind had or not, and Emma scrambled for the first step of controlling the thing within her. The towel untucked from her chest and fell to the floor, and she snatched it up, choosing to rip it into two pieces instead of chucking something else at the wall where a lamp already laid shattered, destroyed.

The door flew open, revealing Regina and Ruby in her own body on the other side. "I told you to stay out!" She screamed at the other two women, eyes flashing yellow. An inhuman sound tore from her throat as she charged the other two, but Regina calmly waved her hand, immobilizing her on the spot and then turning her back respectfully to the naked woman as Ruby stepped into the room and took her cloak from the closet.

"Hey, you're okay, Emma," she soothed the seething woman as she secured the cloak around her throat. "Just breathe and stop fighting what you're feeling, accept it. It's a part of you now," she instructed, unable to keep the sadness from her voice. She should have learned control a long time ago, but her wolf seemed stronger than any other ever written or spoken of in the history of her species. She was special, even an alpha like her father bowed to her superiority despite his age and experience.

"Regina, unfreeze her," Ruby ordered, and the sorceress flicked a wrist over her shoulder. She caught the woman in her body as she sank to the floor, shaken and shaking. "Get out," she ordered, uncaring of the harsh tone she tossed towards the two women at the door.

"What happened?" She asked softly, Emma's vocal cords vibrating strangely with the softer tone.

"Do you feel this every month?" Emma rasped, still bent over her knees and supported by her own body. Ruby laughed suddenly, and Emma glared up at her with chocolate brown eyes that returned with the cloak.

"You smelled Belle." She laughed again and slumped against the bed, pulling a knee towards her chest, the other leg splayed in front of her. Emma rolled her eyes and pulled the red cloak over her naked torso and thighs ass he mimicked the position, legs straight in front.

"Sorry the scent of your woman made me wolf out," Emma muttered and covered face, her own giggles bubbling up from her belly. "This is the weirdest conversation I've ever had."

"Uhhh, yup, and you should probably wear that, especially around Belle," Ruby instructed, flicking a wave in the cape.

"Just until wolf's time is over, right? Two more days?" Emma asked innocently and jumped at the raucous bark of laughter ripping from her own throat by control of Ruby's impulse.

"No, I mean all the time. That woman makes me climb the walls by just walking into a room," Ruby confided, a shy smile and flush creeping onto her face. "It probably just hit you now because you were alone with her."

Emma stared incredulously at the other woman blushing inside her skin. "Fuck. You're serious," she exclaimed, unable to digest the information being tossed at her. "You're so in love with her that just the scent of her makes your body wolf out, even when you're not in it?"

Ruby only hid a smile by ducking her head, allowing blonde hair to bounce into her face, concealing the shy admission. "You should get dressed." She pushed herself to Emma's feet and tossed over her shoulder as she opened the door, "Don't fondle me anymore than you have to."

"Hey, uh, question," Emma called after her and pulled herself from the floor. "How do you want me to handle being in town with Belle?" She searched a dresser, finding bras in the first drawer far too large for Ruby's tiny breasts.

"Here," Ruby saved her from searching the whole damn room and opened the other dresser near the door. "Need help with the clasps?" She nodded towards the fingers still in the protective latex they'd given her at the hospital to keep her fingers dry and protected during showers.

"Uhh, I guess, yeah," Emma stuttered, not having thought far enough ahead. She slipped the straps up her shoulders and presented her back to Ruby to get everything clipped and adjusted. "Belle usually does this stuff for you, doesn't she? Just loves you and heals you by snapping your bra and putting little finger condoms on." She wiggled her fingers as she turned around.

"Finger condoms?"

"I didn't know what else to call them," Emma shrugged sheepishly, suddenly shy in the presence of the woman who bore the wounds that left the scars she'd studied earlier. Ruby's eyes flicked over her chest and torso before the wolf turned back to the dresser and tossed the matching underwear over her shoulder. Emma caught them and slipped into them while Ruby rummaged for a particular outfit.

"Ruby, how did you get all these scars?" Emma asked, guilt heavy in her voice. She wished, not for the first time, that she could remember their lives.

Ruby smirked. "I'm a big damn hero, Emma Swan. Don't tarnish my image," she joked and tugged at the string holding the hood around her throat. Emma grabbed at the fabric, afraid to take it off again. Ruby covered her hands gently. "You're fine. Put these on. I'll be right back."

"Where are you going?"

"I'm taking Belle some shoes. I saw her outfit. She likes the knee-high boots when she wears pantyhose. Be right back," Ruby yelled excitedly and bounded from the room, much like Emma would have. Maybe they had the talent to pull this off after all.

Emma slipped into the loose-fitting black and red print shirt. It felt like rayon or some other sort of soft fabric, breathable and gentle on the wounds covering the body she'd been dumped into. The pants, too, were a soft, loose fabric. They looked like pants designed for horseback riding but were a size too big for Ruby's slim hips. Had she bought them with that intention or had she lost too much weight during the past two months? Probably the latter, Emma thought sadly as Ruby reappeared at the door, closing it behind her conspiratorially.

"Okay, Alex, Belle and Beth are playing in the living room. Henry has managed to get Katy to play some sort of zombie game and Regina is baking. We've got some time," she gushed, lowering her voice suggestively. Emma's eyebrows shot towards the ceiling.

"Well, I was going to ask you to help me with this button, but…" She glanced between them at the open pants falling from her friend's hips. Ruby grabbed the button and closed it.

"Regina's right. Everyone knows we've been hit hard these past few months, and we still don't know if anyone else was working with Jacob, so we need to learn how to be convincing." Ruby grinned like a little possum using Emma's mouth, and The Savior rolled her eyes.

"You want to teach me how to be you?" Emma connected the dots skeptically and crossed her arms, hips jutting forward in a bluffing stance.

"First, don't do that. Kind of…" Ruby grabbed her hips and pushed them to the side. "Just cock them to the side." Emma rolled her eyes, and loosed her hips to fall out of alignment with the rest of her body.

"Ow, seriously? This throws off your entire spine," Emma bitched but dutifully played with the position until something felt halfway normal. "Oh there, that's not so bad. I can totally do this. Wait. Why do you do this? Seriously, your spine must look like hell."

"It's sassy," Ruby stage whispered, nose wrinkling with emphasis. Emma laughed heartily. They were so screwed. "Okay, now let me see your Ruby walk."

Emma chuckled. "Uh huh, and in ten years when your daughter has completely adopted your sass, you're going to wish your spine wasn't out of whack," she jabbed as Ruby pulled her shoulders down.

"Just shut up and do it. I don't stand that straight. Apparently, I have body image issues," she muttered, referencing her brief conversation with Bethany not even an hour prior. Emma noticed the harsh bite in her own voice saying the words of another person and bit her lip. "Just shut the hell up and walk."

"Walk dis way," Emma hunkered over and shuffled sideways around the room, looking more like a monkey than Igor.

"Seriously? You remember that scene from Young Frankenstein but not your wife?" Ruby rolled her eyes, unable to stop the smile spreading on her cheeks. She was glad that she'd switched with Emma and not Regina. Emma's go-with-the-flow attitude definitely made this much easier than Regina's bitchiness. Emma grinned mischievously and straightened, her body language almost taking the task seriously.

"I feel like we should have music for this," Emma blurted, grabbing the hem of Ruby's shirt and popping the other hand on her hip and as she raked her hips back and forth as she crossed the room as she assumed a model might have. "I'm sexy and I know it," she sang as she whipped her head over her shoulder and pouted her lips at her friend.

Ruby slapped a hand over her eyes. "I have never, nor will I ever think duck face is sexy. Don't do that with my lips," she huffed and crossed her arms, hips cocking habitually.

"Don't do that with my hips!" Emma yelled, her voice screeching in such a high octave that it came out as a harsh whisper. She grabbed her throat, confusion all over her face. "That was strange." Ruby chuckled, her hips still cocked to the side. Emma glared and stopped across the room. "Just sort of… yeah, shoulders back, chest open, hips centered. Not all of us have wolf cartilage in our spine, try not to ruin mine, 'kay?"

"So, you just want me to point your tits everywhere?" Ruby pulled her shoulders back uncomfortably and turned in different directions, Emma's boobs bouncing on her chest with each movement.

"Seriously, I will have implants put into these skeeter bites if you don't stop," Emma threatened.

"Go ahead. Just make them your size," Ruby played along, jumping up and down to make Emma's chest wiggle and jiggle. She ended with a shimmy, Emma's shoulders surprisingly fluid and moveable as her wolf body might have been. The Savior's body truly was in impeccable shape for a mere mortal.

"Oh my god, stop," Emma deadpanned, dropping Ruby's face into her hand, unable to stop the giggles bubbling in her chest. They were hopeless. "Glad to see you've found some confidence in my body."

Ruby shrugged and readjusted Emma's breasts where they'd wiggled free from the bra cup. Emma rolled her eyes, not nearly as mortified by someone else adjusting her breasts as she'd thought she should have been. If Ruby wanted to have fun as Emma Swan for a little while, who was she to say differently? The wolf clearly verged on some sort of breakdown and struggled constantly with how her body looked. Who wouldn't with damn near 50 percent scar coverage on her body? Ruby was still a woman beneath the bluster and supernatural strength. No wonder Belle threatened her when she jumped off the balcony.

"We have the same issue, I guess. We just present different symptoms of the same disease," Emma empathized, and Ruby finally glanced up at her. "I bluff, you hide," she elaborated, crossing one arm over her stomach to clutch the other elbow and hunching her shoulders forward.

"You don't have any body image issues," Ruby argued.

"Not specifically, but when I'm feeling insecure or whatever, I puff up like a cat's tail."

"Oh my god," Ruby yelled and followed the startling exclamation with obnoxious and unexplainable laughter. "Gizmo. That fucking cat is going to jump you, and I'm going to laugh my ass off."

Emma covered her face and flopped backwards on the bed, rumbling and growling beneath her hands. Ruby laid down beside her, shoulders touching Emma's as her hands flopped onto the bed. Emma winced when her sore fingers bounced off the mattress. Ruby slipped Emma's callused hand into her own and squeezed gently.

"You know the really fucked up thing about all this?" Emma grunted noncommittally, almost ready to cry in frustration. "I'm really happy that we get to spend time together like this again. We were really close once before everything went to hell."

"What do you mean?" Emma murmured, very confused about the great transgression of Ruby Lucas against Emma Swan.

"I did some crappy things that I'm not very proud of. Regina and I…" She trailed off, unsure how to explain how badly she and Regina ached for each other. It wasn't necessarily sexual, but it wasn't just platonic either.

"Did you sleep with my wife?" Emma growled, rolling to her side and mounting Ruby without a moment's hesitation. Even with the cloak around her neck, rage surged in her veins, the call of the wolf.

"No, I did not sleep with Regina," Ruby said calmly, not even bothering to fight the firm hold on her arms. "Everyone thought that we were, though, and with good reason. We stepped out of line, Emma, and I'm sorry. We've been distant ever since, hence the happy to be spending time with you again thing." Ruby finished lamely.

Emma squeezed harder, searching long and hard into her own slightly fearful green eyes. Ruby blinked, breaking the spell. "Ems, you know how I feel about Belle, how I react to her. If I reacted that way to Regina, you would have done it when she went off earlier with all that anger rolling off of her. We have a connection, but it's not true love."

Emma sat back on the hips she straddled and ran fingers through her wet hair. "I'm not sure Regina and I have that either," she admitted sadly.

"What the hell does that mean?" Ruby pulled Emma's body onto her elbows and glared at the woman on her thighs. Her friends had gone to hell and back for each other, no way was she allowing them to simply give up now.

"It means that Regina wants the woman she married, and I can't be her. I don't know how to be her." The sadness in Emma's voice clutched at their hearts, an iron vice of truth that they'd denied for weeks.

"I know," the wolf agreed in the same defeated tone.

"I do love her and the sex is amazing, but it just feels like there is something missing. I mean, how could she possibly love me the way she loved Older Emma? The whole Truest Believer thing and a magical baby and…" Emma floundered and jerked her hands through Ruby's hair again. It hurt that she'd lost something, and it damn near killed her that she'd taken something from Regina. That woman deserved a sainthood for the crap she'd put up with in the last two months.

"We'll get your memories back, Emma. Just believe, okay? It's about the only thing you're good at," Ruby joked, trying to lighten the mood.

"We are so screwed," she laughed. Apparently, Older Emma overcame her cynicism and jadedness. No matter how hard she pushed herself to believe, to love, to take charge, she would never be that woman everyone in Storybrooke fell in love with.

"That's one word for it, I suppose," Regina's voice snapped from the doorway.

"Regina." Ruby sat up too quickly, and Emma grunted when her ass bounced off the floor. "This is so not what it looks like."

"I don't care," the witch dismissed with a wave of her hand. "It's time for you to leave." The door swung slowly on its hinges as Regina left the two swapped women alone once more. Something was very, very wrong with the matriarch of their household, and as much as it pained them, they doubted very much that anyone save the woman she married could have uncovered exactly what that was.


	6. Proverbial Creek

Enjoy, My Pretties.

Song: All over the place for this chapter

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><p>"Stop fidgeting," Belle snapped, angling her face into Emma's neck. She squeezed her hand reassuringly. She figured that holding Emma's hand was far safer than arms on waists and hands on hips and ribs as she normally would have walked with her lover. She had just returned the previous day and Ruby got hurt pretty badly, so no one really questioned anything when they stepped into the diner with Belle clinging to one hand and Alex on the other.<p>

"Granny!" The little girl screeched, and Emma grabbed her ear as Alex took off towards the kitchen. Granny met her at the end of the counter and wrapped her up in Granny hug, nomming at her stomach. Alex shrieked and squirmed in delight.

"Granny, Mama came home," she bounced excitedly in her grandmother's arms, turning to point at Belle.

"I see, Munchkin," Granny played along, nuzzling her granddaughter's tiny shoulder.

"She says there are twin puppies in her belly," Alex confided, much louder than necessary, and almost everyone in the diner reacted to the news. "She had to leave to protect them," the little girl announced proudly, telling everyone that her Mama hadn't left because of anything she'd done.

"Is that so?" Granny murmured as shocked as everyone else. Belle's face turned ten shades of red, and she slipped her hands lovingly over her barely showing belly. Emma and Ruby both wrapped an arm around Belle's shoulders simultaneously, and the librarian froze in between them. Emma pretended while Ruby genuinely beamed in Emma's skin. They were so screwed.

Belle stepped away from both women and crossed to Granny. "Surprise, Granny," she smiled brightly and leaned into the leathery hand that cupped her cheek.

"I knew you had a reason," Granny whispered and pulled the young woman towards her to press a kiss to her cheek. "Congratulations, Sweetheart."

"Thanks Granny. Oh, uhh, we are also getting married," she said normally, knowing every single person in the room strained to hear her words. No sense in hiding it, even if her fiancée was stuck in the body of her best friend.

"We should celebrate!" Snow exclaimed from a back booth, unable to keep her mouth shut any longer. She crossed to Belle, David trailing behind with hefty reservation about his wife's harebrained idea.

"Oh Mary Margaret, that really…" Emma started, trying desperately to help her squirming friend.

Snow talked right over top of her. "You just come to The Rabbit Hole tonight, and I'll take care of everything else!" The woman practically vibrated in place, threatening to combust and blow glitter and confetti everywhere. "Is seven okay? Not too late?"

"Uhh, that really isn't necessary, Snow. Thank you, though," Belle floundered, completely at a loss at how to make this stop. Ruby's eyes were huge, Emma blanched and looked ready to pass out. If they threw an engagement party for Belle, she at least was required to be there if she wore Ruby's skin, which meant Ruby would go and bring Regina. It would have looked pretty odd if Regina and Emma missed it.

"Of course it is! You've defeated the enemy once again. You're having twins," she proclaimed and invaded Belle's personal space with both hands on her belly. "You're engaged. Of course, we must celebrate. Don't worry, I will take care of everything. All you have to do it show up and be beautiful."

She shrieked and clapped her hands together in front of her chest. "Oh this is so exciting, Ruby. I never thought I'd see the day when you settled down." She rushed to her friend and pulled her daughter into a hug. Emma stiffened, eyes desperately pleading with Ruby to help her. She might have been comfortable with the idea of her parents entering her life once more, but that never meant she'd wanted to hug them yet.

"Mary Margaret, could I help you plan?" Ruby blurted, shrugging at Emma's perplexed expression.

Snow shrieked again, and Emma grabbed her ringing ear. "Emma, of course, Sweetheart. Come, there is a lot to do and not much time," Snow blubbered and looped her arm through the arm she presumed housed her daughter. Ruby glared over her shoulder at the woman in her body. Emma owed her big time. "We must send out the word, first. I'll have Leroy take care of that," the princess babbled as she led her daughter down the sidewalk, leaving her husband to pay their bill.

"Congrats, Belle," he offered, much more calmly than his counterpart and leaned down to kiss her cheek. Belle smiled up at him and touched his shoulder. He proved himself not utterly useless during the Battle for Storybrooke after returning from Neverland. He was the first to learn her secret about the Massacre of Breck and kept it faithfully. In short, he was a trusted friend.

"Ruby," he nodded, and Emma actually allowed the man to hug her.

"I'm going to go with Ma and Grams and Gramps," Henry announced, far too peppy to spend time with the nauseatingly chipper and optimistic couple that brought her into this world.

"Okay, bud, just stay close, okay. We still don't know if there are people out there who were working with Jacob," Emma instructed, far more motherly than Ruby had ever spoken to the boy she perceived as her nephew. Both he and David squinted at the odd directive coming from the wolf. "Sorry, habit," Emma covered, ruffled her son's hair, and then retreated to Belle who glared at her.

"Ruby, I could use some help back here," Granny said in a tone that told Emma that she'd not suggested but practically ordered her to help.

"Excuse me, I'm missing fingernails or do you forget that a psycho held me hostage and tortured me for six hours yesterday?" Emma snapped, remembering to cock her hip to the side as she crossed her arms. It still felt funny but apparently convinced everyone in the room that she was Ruby.

"You're okay enough to walk around town, you're good enough to work. You've got little ones on the way, and you're the one who said you were ready to take this place over. Being a damn fool hero is your hobby, not your job. We're still working off the old menu because we missed our opening last night. Luckily, Bethany and I saved everything, so it didn't go bad," Granny grouched as she handed her great granddaughter to Belle and grabbed a towel from the counter, tossing it at Ruby's chest. That's why Ruby dressed her in loose clothes. She knew she'd get put to work and hadn't wanted the wounds to get irritated.

"Uhh, Granny, I really don't want to. I'm tired and I hurt. Could I just wait some tables for a few hours until Tink gets here? She knows how to close up, right?" Emma scrambled for something to get her out of this mess. Ruby took off and left her to handle this situation alone.

"I think that's a great idea, Sweetheart," Belle saved her. "Alex wants us to take her to the park this afternoon, isn't that right, Baby?" She felt a little guilty using her daughter as an excuse to get Emma out of this hot water, but Alex hadn't minded.

"Park!" She yelled and followed it with a howl. Big wounded, blue eyes looked up at Emma a moment later. "You make the wolf sound, too," she instructed, confused. Wolf always howled with her.

"I'm sorry, Alex, I was distracted," Emma covered quickly. "Ready?" Alex nodded, and Emma tipped her head back and loosed the best howl she could muster, which sounded pretty damn good with Ruby's vocal cords. The girl howled and shrieked with laughter, clapping her hands as they finished.

"Love you, Wolf," she murmured and leaned over to give her adoptive mother a hug.

"I love you, too, Little Wolf," Emma returned, catching Belle's watery eyes over the girl's tiny shoulder. She laughed at herself and wiped at her tears as Alex pulled back, content to only eat lunch with her Mama as Emma immediately set to work. When everything got switched back, she planned to have words with Granny about how ragged everyone ran Ruby. Just because her physical endurance surpassed most, Ruby was still just one woman mentally and emotionally.

A sharp crack had her moving before Emma even registered the movement in her mind. She rubbed her ass, and Granny rolled the towel, preparing to snap it towards Ruby's legs again. Belle shot Emma a helpless, slightly amused look, and took a seat in one of the booths near the middle of the diner. Everyone stared anyway, may as well show them how perfect everything was. Emma conducted herself very Ruby-like, but she wanted to be available to save her if need be.

She pulled out her cell phone and sent Ruby a text. _If you need to make a break for it, I can always fake an emergency back at the mansion._

Emma tangled in the cape and dropped a plate, drawing her attention back to The Savior in the wolf's clumsy body when the cape blocked out her agile wolf. Emma sighed and jerked fingers through Ruby's hair, catching Belle's eyes. The librarian bit her lip, suppressing the laughter that swelled in her chest. Granny yelled from the kitchen, and she chuckled, ducking her face to help Alex read the menu and hiding her happy tears. It felt wonderful to be home, the craziness of the body swap and Regina's moodiness included. It felt like home, normal.

"I can't do this," Emma whispered as she leaned over to take Belle's order after cleaning up the glass mess on the floor.

"You're fine," Belle whispered back and wrapped a hand around her thigh. Emma jerked, unused to the intimate touch from the other woman. "Relax," she muttered, eyes still on the menu.

Emma leaned her hip into the side of the booth and waited for Belle to decide what might satisfy her little wolves and not make her sick. "I'm just going to have some chicken broth and a few crackers. No wait… ask Granny to make that sandwich I had yesterday. Grilled chicken, smoked gouda, relish, honey Dijon mustard and some raspberry sauce. What do you want, Alex?" Belle asked the little girl.

"Mac and cheese!" She yelled excitedly, wiggling on her mother's lap.

"Will you eat some broccoli and a fruit salad with that?" She asked, her tone suggesting that she was getting the fruit and veggies whether she wanted them or not.

"Fine, but I want curly noodles and broc'li in my cheese," she negotiated. Belle nodded, satisfied that the food would be devoured without a fight. "And Mama wants to color with me," she added, blinking up at her wolf with the expectation of being brought crayons and a coloring sheet. She volunteered her mother for the activity, and Belle smiled past her threshold, scar stretching with the expression. She'd missed this place more than she thought possible.

"And also a glass of milk for both of us," Belle added.

Emma smirked at Belle and the tiny girl, the emotion genuine to see mother and child together once more. "Coming right up," she murmured and touched Alex's hair as she pushed off the booth and took the order to the kitchen.

She grabbed two plates from the window, using her days as a waitress to read the ticket. B7. She hoped the booths started at 1 at the door and counted in seven. The couple seemed satisfied with their burgers and chicken fingers, and she released a heavy sigh of relief as she cleared Snow and David's table. She could do this.

Unfortunately, Ruby reached her breaking point far before Emma. Henry and Snow babbled excitedly, David looked miserable and slightly embarrassed, and she muttered under her breath. Snow grabbed her arm and shoved her towards a ladder, forcing another streamer into her hands.

"Emma, please hang this for me. I don't care much for ladders," the other woman looked so hopeful that Ruby actually complied without too much fuss.

"Ya know, I really don't think Belle and Ruby wanted to do this tonight. I mean, Belle just got back in town yesterday and…" Snow cut her off.

"Oh! Another reason to celebrate. I'm so happy she came back. Ruby has been so depressed. I think she would have completely lost it if not for Alex. That little girl is the sweetest thing," Snow gushed as she stabilized the ladder.

"Yes, she is," Ruby agreed, happy to take the compliment thrown at her daughter. Alex saved her soul the past few weeks without Belle.

"Do you think they'll make it this time?" Snow pondered absently, purporting her doubt of Belle and Ruby's relationship. Ruby bristled, barely containing her anger enough to stay on the ladder. "Emma, are you alright, Darling?"

"I just don't think we should be talking about things we really don't know anything about, that's all," she sniped and begrudgingly taped the streamer to the ceiling. "Also, Ruby is an alcoholic. Is a bar really the best place to do this?" She added, allowing the irritation to lace her voice.

"I suppose it isn't, but if we were to hold such an event at the diner, the poor girl would end up working instead of celebrating, and I want her to have a good time. I owe her that much at least," Snow finished in a downtrodden tone, and Ruby's gaze fell to the woman below her.

"Since when do you owe Ruby anything?" She queried apprehensively, not sure she wanted the answer.

"Oh, it's nothing," Snow waved off the importance of her statement. "A long time ago, Ruby and I fought a war against Regina. Have you been told that much?" Ruby nodded, remembering what Emma had and hadn't been made aware of yet. "Well, I'm ashamed to say that I didn't quite treat her with the respect that I should have. None of us really knew a lot about how her wolf affected her behavior until recently, so she… she behaved in certain ways that I disapproved of at the time and wasn't shy about saying as much."

"You took her for granted," Ruby finished, unable to keep the wet emotion from Emma's voice.

Snow smiled sadly. "Yes, I took her for granted. I never saw her as more than an unfocused, promiscuous, broken little girl. Regina saw differently, and she was right. Ruby is more loyal and stronger and braver than any other person in Storybrooke, she just needed a chance to prove it. Regina and you and Belle, you gave her that chance, and now she'd do anything for you." Snow sighed melodramatically, destroying the moment they'd created. Ruby discreetly wiped her wet cheek on her shoulder as she taped another piece of streamer to the ceiling.

She pulled out her phone without descending the ladder and answered the text that Belle sent her earlier. _No crisis necessary. Let's try to make the best of this party. It seems really important to Snow. _

She tucked the phone away and lowered her body to the floor. Snow squeaked when she took her up in a hug. "Thanks, Snow. This is going to mean a lot to Ruby and Belle. I'm sure she knows that you care," she spurted, tears dripping onto her cheeks.

"Emma, are you okay?" David asked, keeping a respectful distance as his daughter clung to her mother tightly. She suddenly remember whose body she occupied and dropped her hands to her sides and took a step back before wiping her tears.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm good. Just… weird, ya know? Family and all that. Hey, you guys think you can finish up here? I'm just going to go get some air, maybe walk in the park," she suggested, emotional enough that Emma's parents hadn't questioned the sudden need for space.

"Of course, Sweetheart. Just be careful," Snow called after her, concerned that her prediction of another accomplice still on the loose was correct. David laid his heavy arm over her shoulders and kissed her temple. Snow leaned into her husband and covered her belly.

"Will there ever be a good time to tell her?" She whispered, conscious of Henry lurking about. He chattered with the bartender 20 feet away, safely out of earshot.

"You can't wear baggy shirts forever. We couldn't possibly have known she'd have gotten amnesia, Snow, but we do need to tell her. You're already starting to show. We waited until she found us again after Pan's curse. We couldn't have known this would happen," David dropped into her ear, possibly more upset than his wife at the thought of losing his daughter all over again. He overcame so much just walk her down the aisle to Regina to a woman, something he initially struggled with as a person and not just as a father.

"I know. I just can't imagine how hard this is for her right now," Snow answered sadly. Emma lost everything, and now they took what little stability she felt with them away again.

Ruby gulped air as she practically sprinted down the sidewalk in Emma's body. She nodded at some folks who waved and pulled her cell phone from her pocket. _Can you meet me in the backroom at the diner in five minutes?_ She sent the text to Belle. They'd been setting up for the party for hours now, and she just needed a minute with her fiancée.

Belle never answered, but when she slipped into the back door, she saw the other woman holding her stomach in the backroom. She closed the door and leaned against it. Belle smiled sadly at the woman she loved trapped inside the woman she considered a close and trusted friend. Without speaking, Belle leaned against her, hands brushing over her hips tenderly.

"This is Emma's body, Babe," she reminded her reluctantly. Belle's touch felt wonderful, the body she occupied mattered very little to her in that moment.

"I'm well-aware, Sweetheart," she murmured into her neck, following the words with a kiss. She hummed, her body shifting against Emma's in a familiar way that made Ruby burn for her lover.

"Think Emma would mind if I kissed you?" She asked, her voice dropping in octave as her arousal rose.

"Regina said hugging and handholding," Belle grumbled quietly, unable to stop her body from twitching with the effort of behaving. "I think my pregnancy hormones may give your wolf some healthy competition in regards to sexual frustration," a sultry, accented voice blew the words into her ear, and Ruby shivered.

"We have to stop now," Ruby blurted, pushing Belle away from her. Bright green eyes stared down at hazy baby blues, and both women swallowed.

"Perhaps you can watch me attend to it later," Belle suggested, but her nose immediately wrinkled in distaste for the idea. As long she stayed out of sight, it wasn't difficult to imagine Ruby in the proper body, despite the larger breasts and fuller, slightly shorter figure of Emma Swan. She knew it was Ruby in there, felt the tug in her soul towards the blonde woman. It mattered very little whose body housed her.

"At least I know it's me you want," Ruby quipped.

"I believe we're up the proverbial creek," Belle agreed and stepped away from the body that belonged to neither of them. She laughed at their situation and nestled into the warm, firm body trapped between her and the door. She hadn't exactly planned their reconciliation to happen exactly like this, but a part of her felt glad that it had. If they hadn't the ability to make love for a week, perhaps they'd actually talk, sort out their issues completely before resuming their physical relationship.

She sighed contentedly. All of that came later, but for now, she just wanted to hug Ruby and pretend that everything was normal before everything hit the fan later that evening when they told Regina about the mess they'd gotten into with Snow. That was not a conversation she looked forward to.


	7. United Front?

So, you folks don't seem too interested in the light stuff that I've been throwing at you, so I've decided to go with my gut and just do what I do best. Enjoy!

Songs: Last Friday Night by Katy Perry, Cyclone by Baby Bash

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><p>"No," Regina stated firmly for the hundredth time and turned away from Belle who had chased her down in the foyer on her way to the kitchen.<p>

"Regina, you are the one who placed these constraints on us," Belle insisted, following the other woman into the kitchen while Ruby and Emma lingered in the middle of the foyer, awed by the gumption of the normally quiet and unobtrusive woman.

"Those _constraints_ are for our protection," Regina snapped. She slammed a glass onto the counter, shattering it. She hissed and plucked a shard from her palm. Emma pushed past Ruby and Belle, her intentions of helping her wife clean up the mess clear. Regina's death glare stopped her in her tracks. The elder witch closed her eyes, face contorted with an intense focus they'd only seen a handful of times. She waved her hand over the wound in the other and gritted her teeth as it closed slowly.

"Regina," Belle breathed, the only one unafraid to step forward and grab her friend's hand. She snagged a towel from the handle of the oven door and wiped away the blood. The gash hadn't healed fully, but it looked like a cut when a scab was picked off too soon. "Regina, this is incredible. You're teaching yourself how to heal. This is amazing."

The sorceress wrenched her hand free and grabbed another glass from the cabinet, waving her hand over the other still in pieces on the counter. It disappeared, and the other three took a moment to be concerned about the amount of magic Regina had used recently for everyday tasks. She filled the glass with some type of concoction Katy kept in the refrigerator and turned to settle a glare at the other three women.

"I have heard far more disturbing facts today beyond Snow's broken heart at my absence tonight. She'll survive, I'm sure," Regina dismissed her mother-in-law flippantly.

"Regina, it's going to look suspicious if we go without you," Belle tried again, knowing her back-up singers were too chicken to belt above the lead. "Please? I know you want to stay with Katy and that you've had a rough day, but you said it yourself, we need to present a united front." Belle crossed her arms, not back down one inch.

"If we actually created one, there would be no need to present such a fictitious image," she snapped, her chest flushing with the hot rage coursing through her veins. She really wanted to tear into the other three but clamped her mouth shut, averting her gaze to the counter.

"What the hell does that mean?" Ruby blurted, finally finding some courage to face the angst-addled queen. Regina brooded since last night, and no one had figured out why yet.

"It means, Miss Lucas, that I no longer wish to play these games. Good and evil, black and white. You flit to one and then the other as it suits your purpose. No one blinked at the violence I inflicted upon Jason, yet the affront to us is a personal offense. My behavior was no different than his, the difference being I don't have a mental disorder that led to my actions. I chose them because I wanted to, because I enjoy inflicting physical pain upon others. It's a part of who I am, and it's a part of me that I've suppressed at your behest, to fit the image of what you three believed I should be. I've surpassed caring of your opinions, so if you'll excuse me, my daughter requires my attention." Regina pushed past them, and the three stunned heroes parted to allow her to pass.

They watched her disappear into the basement, too stunned to stop her. Ruby pressed closer to Belle, wrapping an arm around her waist. Emma barely blinked at the sight of her body loving on Belle. It just really seemed unimportant at the moment. Regina was right, and it stung.

"Now what?" Ruby asked quietly, glancing at Belle for guidance. She was the expert in rehabilitation of dark souls. Belle shrugged, completely at a loss.

"What would Older Emma have done?" Emma asked helplessly. Regina had barely looked at her since her conversation with Katy the previous night. She thought everything was fine. Regina covered her finger in brownie batter and practically finger fucked her mouth, and now she grunted and clipped directives without actually speaking to anyone but Katy.

"She would have accompanied me upstairs to assist with the zipper of my dress," Regina's deep, rumbling voice called from the foyer, and the other three jumped. Confusion ran rampant, but the older woman never stopped to address it. "A united front, right?" She added without elaborating the deeper motives or what had been said beneath their feet in the basement.

"Right," Belle agreed, a hint of a smile on her lips.

"Eva and Lauren are on their way to sit with the children. I'll stay no longer than one hour," she informed all of them regally without glancing over her shoulder as she stalked towards the stairs. Ruby pushed Emma forward, and The Savior took off like a shot, trailing behind her wife like a big clumsy puppy in Ruby's cloak.

"Hugs only," Belle called after them, not at all happy about her lover's body helping Regina dress. The tiny huff of frustration Belle released when she turned from the foyer and plopped onto a stool at the island only endeared her more to the swapped wolf.

"You don't like the thought of Regina touching my body at all, do you, even when I'm not in it," Ruby stated, not even bothering to ask if that's what got under her lover's skin.

"Don't be absurd," Belle sniped, saving face.

Ruby chuckled and tucked some hair behind her ear, taking a moment to brush her thumb over Belle's scar. "Baby, your princess is showing," she teased gently.

Belle's face flushed so quickly that Ruby thought she'd found the secret to spontaneous human combustion. "Ruby Lucas, I will murder you slowly and painfully if you ever put me through that again."

"Hey, it's not…"

"Do you even know what I went through in The Enchanted Forest?" Belle yelled, standing so quickly that her stool tipped backwards and clattered on the tiled floor. "Every day, Ruby, I watched you get closer to her. It made me insane. I can't tell you how many daydreams I concocted in which I slit Regina's throat and then cut off your fingers."

"Uhh," Ruby stuttered, unsure if Belle intended to follow-thru in that moment or not.

"I missed you so much," the librarian sobbed, flinging herself into Ruby's arms and burying her face in Emma's golden hair. "I'm so sorry I left."

"Umm," Ruby tried again, not quite sure exactly what just happened.

"Just shut up. I don't want to hear your stupid voice," Belle snapped, and Ruby's mouth clicked shut. Belle cried quietly for a few seconds, accepting the soothing touches across her back as comfort.

"Ruby, tell me everything is going to be okay," she bade quietly, contradicted her previous directive, unable to stop the vortex of emotions swirling in her heart. She attempted to extricate genuine emotions from those caused by her hormones but failed miserably. She simply didn't know which was which, and she found herself grateful that Henry occupied her daughter upstairs in his room while they discussed their issues.

"Everything will be okay, Baby," Ruby murmured, finally finding her foot in this very odd situation.

"You don't know that," Belle countered, suddenly angered by the triteness of the platitude she'd asked for. She jerked out of the embrace and slapped her hands on Emma's shoulders, catching the wolf off guard. She probably wouldn't have even felt the blows in her own body.

"Belle, what do you want from me?" Ruby asked desperately, holding her lover's hands loosely to prevent another assault. Surely she'd not done anything so horrible as to cause this sort of reaction in the other woman. Something deeper took hold of Belle's emotions.

The librarian studied the green eyes searching for some sort of clue. Ruby resided in the expression, and she grabbed both sides of Emma's face, pressing a rough kiss to her lips. An odd squeak vibrated at the back of Ruby's throat, and she gently removed herself from the kiss, holding Belle in place with firm hands on her shoulders. Though Emma's body reacted to the intimate touches, it felt odd, still. Something fell short from the experience, and Ruby missed her body more than ever.

"I'm sorry," Belle whispered, dissolving into tears once more.

"Hey, what's going on? You were fine two minutes ago," Ruby probed cautiously, taking the other woman in her arms once more.

"It's these damn pregnancy hormones," Belle cried a moment before she sobbed uncontrollably. Ah, that made sense. Ruby held her tighter, choosing silence while Belle cried quietly into her chest.

"I'm going to get fat, and you're not going to be attracted me anymore," she whined, and Ruby barely caught the laugh that rolled over her tongue and caught behind her teeth just in time.

"Where did that come from?" She asked, unable to keep the quiver of amusement from her voice. Belle pulled back, immediately detecting the shimmer of levity in her lover's now green eyes.

"You're laughing at me," Belle uttered, dejected, a slave to the insecurity of the moment. She covered her face with both hands, mumbling incoherently behind the barrier of flesh and bone. Ruby chewed Emma's lip furiously, almost unable to keep the smile from spreading.

"Belle," she started, touching the distraught woman's shoulders. Laughter caught in her throat again, and she bowed her head, trying desperately to reign her emotions in before Belle exploded. "Belle, listen to me. There is nothing you could do that would make me less attracted to you. You're carrying my children. That is… how many women can say that their partners actually carried their flesh and blood? You're amazing."

Belle hiccupped, sniffling and red-eyed as she raised her face to study her partner's sincerity. Ruby smiled, caught up in the beauty of Belle when she allowed her emotions to rule instead of her brain. She wiped a wet cheek with one hand, allowing her fingers to settle in Belle's frizzy blonde hair. "You're amazing," she repeated, finally setting foot on solid ground.

"I hate my hair this color," she admitted, abruptly switching directions of conversation again as she leaned into her lover without hiding her face this time. Her back rested against the island, Ruby's arms securely around her.

"Maybe Amelia can make you some of the hair potion stuff… without the explosion this time," Ruby joked morbidly. "That would be safe for our puppies, right?" Amelia nearly died, but if they couldn't joke about the last few months of their lives, they were doomed to depression and their own individual vices.

"We should go see her tomorrow." Belle sighed heavily and allowed Ruby to hold her closely. "She almost died trying to save us. The least we can do is be there for her recovery."

"If that's what you want, then we shall go see Amelia. Hell, we can go after the party if you want," Ruby placated her emotional lover, propping her chin on Belle's shoulder to look up at the suddenly quiet and still woman, much more like the Belle she'd fallen in love with. Methodical, logical, intellectual Belle… not hormonal, irrational Belle, though she got as many free passes as she needed since she made room inside her womb for two tiny wolves.

"Ready," Regina announced as she hit the foyer floor, clicking smartly in her stilettos. Belle and Ruby both stuttered for a moment when they caught sight of the woman who only ten minutes ago wore a pair of slacks and an untucked blouse. Her shoes matched perfectly the blood red dress that Regina rocked. It stopped mid-thigh and hugged every single inch of her in all the right ways, and Ruby wondered for a hot second if Regina altered it magically to fit her. A few tendrils fell strategically from the clip that held the rest of her hair from her face which shimmered slightly with some sort of color-enhancing makeup and harmonized with the bright touch of red staining her lips.

The Queen had made an appearance, and Ruby swallowed roughly when she remembered that she was to be her escort. Regina waved her hand, and Ruby jerked as her body tingled and itched all over. A pants suit replaced the skinny jeans and tank top of Emma's that she'd worn all day, and Regina took a moment to straighten the tie at her neck.

"Try not to get your shade on my wife's collar, dear," she barbed, her voice slithering over their eardrums, sensual and sultry and dangerous. Regina's light brown eyes flicked to Belle's lips for exactly one second, enough to memorize the color of her lipstick.

The doorbell rang, drawing Regina's attention from her slightly freaked out family. The abrupt change in demeanor set them all of edge. She left the kitchen without a word to let Lauren and Eva into the house, assuming they were the ones at the door. Emma sat on a stool, hands calmly clasped between Ruby's thighs. Ruby felt for the poor girl.

"She's, uhhh…" Emma started, head moving back and forth slowly. "We've got to get her back." She swallowed roughly and avoided her own green eyes staring at her. "I'm sorry, this body uhh… my mind… she…"

"Emma, you're fine. Just avoid taking care of business, and we'll be okay," Ruby brushed off Emma's obvious arousal by her wife's appearance and attitude, guiltily remembering her few minutes with Belle in the back of the diner and the kiss only a few moments ago. "We'll bring her back."

"Then we need to put aside our own feelings towards the subject and help Katy. There will be time to be angry once Katy isn't at risk of suicide or someone else taking advantage of her," Belle shined light on their path, but it remained their task to following it or not. She left the kitchen, her own heels tapping lightly on the tile. Her light blue dressed, swished and swayed, much tamer than Regina's.

"She's right, ya know," Emma mumbled. Ruby nodded but remained silent. There was nothing left to say. Their women were brilliant and always right, and they needed to learn that before someone got hurt… namely, them.

"Maybe it's a good thing you don't have you body. Regina might kill you if ya did," Ruby quipped, pulling at the collar of the dress shirt Regina deigned suitable in which to escort her.

"Are you suggesting that my wife would be so sexually aggressive in this state that she may potentially risk my life?" Emma glommed onto the flow of conversation, unable to process anything more that day than she already had. Learning how to work the diner was difficult enough without all this bullshit.

"I see your wild cat and raise you a hormonally charged vixen," Ruby raised the stakes of the evening, and Emma chuckled. Ruby nodded in agreement. "Yup, we're screwed."

"Emma, Ruby!" Regina's voice snapped at them and echoed off the foyer walls. The two snapped to attention and scrambled towards the door. Lauren smiled brightly at them, genuinely happy to see the women who rescued her after two weeks in captivity. She still looked weak and not at all ready for the blasts of energy that were their children, but with Eva and Henry, she had all the support she needed.

"Emma, how are you?" Lauren rasped, her voice still raw from the abuse it suffered and the lack of hydration that went through her mouth. She pulled Ruby into a hug, not yet knowing of the body swap. She jerked back, nearly stumbling into Eva in her haste to part from the weird energy surrounding her friend's body.

"Who the hell are you?" She demanded, holding an arm in front of her surgeon protectively. Eva took her hand and pressed a kiss to the back of it, soothing the nurse before she lashed out. A collective sigh exhaled around the room, and one more person jumped onto their speeding bus of secrets.

"She's Ruby, Darling," Eva explained. "Remember when I said that something hadn't gone quite right when I pulled Emma and Regina from the dreamscape? Ruby and Emma accidentally switched bodies."

Lauren's big green eyes widened, and she touched first Ruby and then Emma. Everyone startled when she laughed suddenly. She covered her mouth, clapping off the sound, but her hand fell slowly to reveal a highly amused smirk and eyes twinkling with mischief. "Maybe Amelia's suggestion of a foursome would set things right," she offered uselessly just to see the steamed reactions from Belle and Regina and the curious exchange of glances between Ruby and Emma.

"Good evening, Miss Danes. I shall return around eight o'clock. Try not to leak this information to my children during those 60 minutes," Regina sniped and crossed her arms over her chest as she bore the crisp evening without a jacket. Lauren snickered at the other three following at a clipped pace. No one wanted to push Regina over the edge that night, so they kept their distance.

"Eva," Lauren said seriously, closing the door and blocking out the chilly air and the chance of the wind carrying her words to Ruby's… Emma's?… sensitive ears.

"I know," she said sadly. "We should tell them soon if we can't figure out how to switch them back."

"It's going to destroy Regina and Belle," Lauren stated what they already knew. "Eva, we can't let them die."

"I've been consulting the dream world all day, Lauren. There is no precedent for this. No one currently guiding a soul through a dreamscape has ever heard of this occurring. As far as anyone knows, it is a freak accident caused by the extraordinary circumstances surrounding them. Emma's damaged mind could have opened the portal, or my connection with them. I haven't a clue," Eva threw up her hands and stomped up the stairs only to reach the top and immediately return to the bottom to offer her arm to her weaker partner.

"I know this is inappropriate, but I think it is so cool that you can communicate with other realms through dreams." She smiled down at her partner and wrapped an arm around the shorter woman's shoulders when they reached the top of the stairs.

"People are far more vulnerable than they could ever imagine while dreaming," the soul seer murmured distantly, and Lauren wondered, not for the first time, why Eva abandoned her powers for so long. The older woman smiled up at her lover. "We have time, yet. No sense to worry them needlessly until we've exhausted every option. Bethany is researching Belle's library, and I still have a few things I want to try."

"If they don't kill each other first," Lauren joked, comforting herself through the heavy moment and lowered her aching body into a plushy leather sofa.

"Or Snow," Eva added, offering her partner a strong chest and shoulder to nestle into, which she happily did.

Across town, the four heroes in question entered The Rabbit Hole, eager to get the night started just to have it closer to ending. Snow squealed excitedly and rushed to Belle and Ruby, flinging her arms around both of them at once. Everyone else clapped and cheered. Some of the people in attendance were Belle's soldiers during the war, others were in the outer circle of the group, like the dwarves and employees from the diner. All of them raised a glass to their guests of honor and cheered.

Emma wrapped her arm around Belle's shoulders, playing the part, but the soft fingertips touching her lower back soothed her far more. Ruby remained at her side, even if she wasn't in the proper body. Belle's heart calmed under Ruby's gentle caress, and she leaned into Emma's side, touching her hand lightly to her the familiar ribs beneath the loose-fitting dress shirt. They could do this. They were capable of fooling a room full of people that everything seemed perfectly normal.

Ruby leaned between them from behind, her other arm still wrapped tightly in Regina's, keeping the fourth member of their group close. "Do not take that cloak off for any reason, Emma. Not tonight," she warned ominously, and Emma nodded

"Kiss!" Someone from the back yelled, and the fingertips on her back froze.

"Yeah, give us a kiss," Leroy joined in the celebration and supposedly good-natured barbing. He clanked the side of his glass.

Emma rolled her eyes. "That's for a wedding, nitwit," she snapped.

"Not tonight, it isn't!" He yelled, and the crowd erupted into cheers.

"If you kiss my fiancée, I will make you regret it all night," Ruby seethed in her ear, and Emma knew the threat held an entire damn tank of water.

"Don't really have a choice here," Emma tossed over her shoulder. Before anything else could be said, she grabbed Belle's face and covered her lips with her own, quick enough that it might have been passed off as platonic but long enough to make it seem passionate. It was an acquired skill, to pretend kiss. She'd done it a hundred times as a bail bonds person. She jerked with the realization of the memory and nearly stagger backwards, saved only by Belle's firm hand around her waist.

"Belle, I'm having a memory flash," she whispered into her ear, looking only like a lover whispering something into the ear of her beloved.

"Snow, we're going to sit," Belle departed from the gathering crowd quickly and pushed her way to an empty booth that had been reserved for them. It was shaped like a crescent with drink holders built in rather than clutter the room with another table. The decorations marked it as theirs, and she practically fell into it with Emma on top of her.

"Emma, what can I do?" She whispered into her friend's ear as Emma her face in her chest.

"Just give me a minute. It's a lot of information to process," Emma responded, sounding strained but relatively fine.

"How about a kiss for the other two Heroines of Storybrooke!" Leroy started the crowd again, but Regina's glare made him swallow and cower slightly on his stool.

"I do not kiss my wife for the entertainment of others," Regina set the record straight and crossed to the booth in the middle of the room, rocking her dress and heels like a fucking movie star. She sat beside Emma, and Ruby flanked Belle on the other side. It actually looked completely normal for the two more vulnerable members of the four to be surrounded by the other two in that moment.

"Regina, she's having a memory flash," Belle explained when the sorceress leaned over Ruby's body to get closer to the librarian.

She nodded but said nothing to Belle. She touched Ruby's ribs lightly and hummed into her ear. "Relax, Emma," she encouraged and then continued humming lightly. The crowd started to fall silent as they realized that something was truly wrong.

Ruby jumped up in Emma's body. "It's alright, everyone. Ruby's been having slight cramps since being electrocuted yesterday. Nothing to worry about. Her wolf will heal soon enough," she explained, and a whisper of relief pulled through the masses, slackening the band of tension around them.

"Emma, your favorite: double whiskey neat," Charlie the bartender called from the bar. Ruby floundered. She couldn't drink, not even in Emma's body.

"Uhh, sorry, Charlie. Doc says no booze until my memories get clearer," Emma called back, and a sigh of disappointment tore through the crowd this time. She truly felt the urge to murder Snow White.

Regina stood. "I, on the other hand, am neither brain damaged, pregnant, nor an addict," she rumbled dangerously as she crossed to the bar and downed the shot of whiskey without wincing and then returned to "Ruby's" side. The bar erupted into cheers, and Regina rolled her eyes.

"Emma, please order something with tequila for me," she instructed Ruby. "If I must be in this germ-infested health hazard, I will be at the very least be plied generously with alcohol. Nothing cheap, and it will be added to Snow's tab." Ruby chuckled and crossed to the bar.

"Which is safer to order for her: tequila sunrise or a margarita?" She asked, unsure which Charlie made better.

"Margarita," he answered immediately, and Ruby nodded. "Extra salt?"

"God yes, change that woman's blood chemistry before she explodes and burns the whole damn place down to get rid of the germs," Ruby joked with the man who had given Emma the nachos that led to her reconnection to Regina on the beach. "Uhh, could you make that frozen? Slow her consumption a bit."

"You got it, Sheriff." The man winked and ambled away to make the drink.

"Hey, Charlie, is this music playing on an Ipod or something where I can pick the song?" She asked as she watched Emma recover slowly. Everyone clanked their glasses again, and she kissed Belle with slightly less reservation this time. Ruby knew she complied to keep the public happy, but if she watched someone else kiss her lady one more time, she was going to pop.

"Sure, Sheriff. I'll turn it off it you want to pick something on the jukebox," he tossed over his shoulder and pointed towards the far wall where the music player sat. She grinned wickedly and slipped through the crowd practically unseen with everyone's attention on the freshly engaged couple. Emma held her ears discreetly, and Ruby felt a sense of satisfaction at her discomfort. It was about to get ten times worse.

She searched for an older song that Emma would be familiar with in her amnesiac brain, grinning in satisfaction when the perfect one popped up. She slid her cash into the machine, selected a different song first, that one second and then two other follow-up songs just in case Emma hadn't learned her lesson. By the time she finished, Regina's drink sat on the bar, awaiting consumption, and Ruby nearly took a sip just to brace herself. Regina smiled gratefully and pulled the salty alcohol and blended ice through the straw.

Someone thought it was a brilliant idea to give Snow the karaoke mic, and she called for another kiss. This was getting out of hand. She bristled and slipped her hands into the pockets of her suit. She leaned next to Emma's ear as the song came to an end. "I told you that I'd make you regret it."

Emma eyes widened dramatically. Ruby grinned mischievously and levered Emma's lithe body onto the bar. "Whooo! Now it's a party!" She called over the crowd as the song started.

Jaws dropped. Snow and David looked positively mortified. Drinks were lifted as she crossed to the center of the bar and unbuttoned her blazer slowly and bounced her shoulders to the beat, which took the jacket slowly down her arms, before draping it over Leroy's head. Her hips never stopped moving. The tie slipped down easily, and she left the knot hanging loosely on her chest.

"Emma Swan, what on earth are you doing?" Regina demanded, not at all amused.

Ruby ignored her and clapped her hands. "To the window. To the wall!" She grinned when half of the people in The Rabbit Hole sang with her. She popped a button on her shirt, and a rowdy cheer broke out, led by Leroy, surprisingly without Astrid. After her session with Katy, the poor woman probably needed a week to herself to recover.

She popped another button, and Regina finished her drink in two gulps while Emma looked ready to pass out from hyperventilation. Belle touched a hand to her cheek, hiding her grin from the other two women of their group. Her lover seemed so happy and carefree, something she'd not been in such a long time, and despite the embarrassment to Emma's reputation, she couldn't have brought herself to scowl if she tried. Ruby whipped Emma's toned ass in a large circle, giving everyone in the room a nice view, hiding her body as she popped the rest of her buttons even though it was obvious what she was doing.

She whipped around quickly, shirt wide open. Cheers rang out, followed by disappointed groans when they saw nothing but Emma's white tank top, which Ruby slowly untucked by running her hands lasciviously over Emma's toned stomach, giving everyone just a little peek of the flesh between the hem of the shirt and her low-riding slacks. Regina ordered another drink, minus the ice. Her cheeks already flushed with the glow of alcohol, and Ruby remembered that none of them had eaten dinner. She maintain the propriety of irritation, but out of the corner of her eye, she watched her wife's body moving suggestively, her wife's hands touching the toned body she loved so much.

She swallowed roughly as the song ended, but Ruby hadn't finished just yet. She moved her hips to a beat only she heard until the song changed. A slightly slower song played, and she offered her hands to two of the raptly interested men watching. They took them graciously, understanding that this was a strictly no-touching situation. Emma's body was capable of jumping off the bar easily, but this felt better, all tease and no please. No one dared make a move on Regina's wife, but they eagerly lowered her to the floor once again and watched as she popped and locked to The Queen who crossed her legs and tossed one arm over the back of the bench seat, predatory waves rolling from her.

"She moves her body like a cyclone," Ruby whispered and slipped her knee beside Regina's thigh, just short of rubbing Emma's crotch over her wife's crossed thighs.

"Regina," Emma bit, nudging her wife with her elbow.

The Queen raised an eyebrow but never moved her eyes from Ruby moving her wife's body for her pleasure. "Just playing along, Dear. You understand," she made perfectly clear her stance on Emma kissing Belle and reached out to brush fingertips over Emma's well-developed ab muscles as she sipped her second margarita, eyes never leaving the body gyrating above her.

"Okay, I get the point. Make this stop," Emma ordered.

Regina raised her brow again, taking another healthy sip. "In a moment, Darling," she teased. Ruby grabbed the back of the seat and rolled her hips towards Regina's without ever touching. She understood the boundaries set in place and took extra care not to cross them, for Belle's sake as well as Emma's. Regina nodded as the song ended, and Ruby returned it, slumping into the seat beside her and nuzzled into her neck.

Snow stood at the microphone, completely speechless as were half the men suddenly hunched over their drinks at the bar, backs to the women, and Emma's nose wrinkled with the thought of what they might have been hiding. Leroy brought her blazer and held it out to her. "I'm happy for ya, Belle and Ruby. I think I'm going to call it a night and go home to Astrid," he said as respectfully as possible.

"Oh ew, Leroy!" Emma exclaimed, knowing it was her body that made the man want to bolt so quickly to his lover. He grinned sheepishly and took off with a shrug of his shoulders.

"Can we please stop kissing now?" Emma yelled at Snow who still had yet to close her mouth at watching her first born shake what she'd given her. "Say yes unless you want a repeat performance," she yelled over the mostly silent bar. Snow nodded, slowly bringing her jaws together.

"Alright, would anyone like to make a toast?" Snow asked, desperately trying to block out the last ten minutes that had been forever burned into her memory. No one volunteered, uncertain how exactly to proceed after such a display from their princess and elected sheriff. Granted, her amnesia probably played a huge part, right?

"Okay, I'll start," Snow babbled, keeping it together much better than David who had gone from sipping a beer to a bottle of whiskey.

The four heroines tuned her out, too busy glaring or laughing at each other to pay attention. It wasn't perfect, but what in their lives had been? For a brief moment in time, though, it felt almost normal. It felt good to be in the presence of the other three. The pain throbbed beneath it all, but it fell to the background as Emma and Ruby continued to do embarrassing things to get under the other's skin. Regina drank until it felt better, and Belle wiped happy tears every couple of minutes, knowing how surrounded by love and support she was. No one shunned her, no one blamed her for Breck, no one pointed a finger or unkind look at her.

They were home.

At least, they were until Regina downed her third margarita and in her drunken haze slid a hand up Ruby's thigh suggestively. It trailed all the way to Ruby's hip, and she squeezed lightly, fingertips playing beneath the hem of the tank top. Ruby grabbed the hand, glad that Emma was still stronger than Regina, even in her weaker, regular human body.

"Regina, I'm not Emma, remember," she dropped into her ear, but Emma's stiffened posture told Ruby that she heard every single word on the other side of the witch. She cursed her body's superior hearing and focused on controlling a drunk Regina. The woman rarely drank anymore, the last time was when she'd completely obliterated her senses with that damn apple-flavored liquor in her office when Emma was in a coma after being shot.

"Tell me you've never thought about this, and I'll stop," Regina challenged, not sounding like herself at all. Ruby glanced at Belle, blissfully unaware of the whispered words, and Ruby felt grateful for the raucous crowd for the first time that night.

"Regina, stop," Ruby commanded, struggling to keep up with Regina's hands that seemed to touch her everywhere for only a moment before moving to a different spot. She clapped a hand over Regina's when it grabbed her breast… or more accurately, Emma's. This was not good. Not at all. She knew Ruby occupied the body, but apparently, Regina cared very little at that point. She was drunk and heartbroken and aching just like the rest of them.

"All those nights in The Enchanted Forest, Ruby. Tell me it never crossed your mind, tearing at me in a way you'd never go at Belle. Your Madonna and your Whore," Regina exploited what she already knew. If she and Ruby ever went at it, both of them probably would have needed a week to recover, but they'd be sated in a way their lovers may never be able to reach.

"Regina, that's enough," Emma interjected, catching every word with Ruby's superior hearing. She was neither amused nor reassured by the actions of her wife.

"Yes, it really is," Ruby agreed. "I'm sorry," she apologized to Emma, which only made the woman fume more. The full moon rose completely around this time. She knew how much it pulled even with the cloak masking the symptoms.

"Shut up, Emma," Regina ordered, glaring at her wife in her best friend's body. When Regina turned back to Ruby in her body and forced her into a heated kiss, Emma snapped.

She grabbed the tie around Ruby's throat, her throat, and jerked her to the floor. The bar fell silent as they struggled for dominance on the floor. The anger made no sense. Regina deserved her ire, but she just felt like gouging Ruby's eyes out and then ripping off her lips for daring to touch her wife. Ruby shoved the heel of her hand into Emma's stomach, catching the gash she knew to be there. Hurting the image of herself brought a sick satisfaction to the stunted savior. She'd failed Regina, her family, fell short in every possible way, even sexual pleasure, and it scratched at the wolf's rage fighting to free itself from the constraints of the cloak.

Emma growled in frustration and tore at the strings on her throat. Their strengths were damn near evenly matched with the stupid wolf-inhibiting cloak thwarting the wolf begging to be free, to run, to kill. Ruby grabbed at the strings.

"You need to calm down and breathe," she said in a calm, even voice that quivered slightly on the very last word. A hint of fear tickled Emma's nostrils, and she jerked free from Ruby's hands, flipping the hood from her shoulders.

"Open the doors!" Ruby yelled in Emma's voice, and the relief that came with the cool gust of the crispy night air lasted only a few seconds when Emma punched her in the jaw. She shook her head, dazed.

"You need to put this back on," Belle said calmly, holding the cloak in front of her. Yellow flashed as the woman's scent wafted towards the unhinged wolf.

"Belle, get back!" Ruby yelled, barely keeping hold of Emma as she lunged for the other woman. They struggled on the floor, Ruby holding a wrist behind Emma's back as the woman in her body bucked and wriggled. "Belle, you need to magic flash. Get the hell out of here!"

Emma wiggled her free arm beneath Ruby's body and pushed up with all her strength, throwing Ruby to the floor behind her. Stools and chairs toppled as Emma's weaker body crashed into them. Belle reached for the earth, pulling deep breaths into her nose and releasing them slowly. A moment before Emma reached her, she muttered and incantation required for Earth Magic and disappeared in a puff of mustard yellow smoke. Emma bolted for the door, and Ruby scrambled to her feet and snagged the cloak from the floor.

"David, sound the town alarm! Get people inside now!" She yelled, sprinted towards the door. "Someone get Regina home now!"

"Emma, what are you doing?" Snow demanded.

"I've got to stop her before she… just get Regina home and sound the damn alarm!" She ordered, voice vibrating as she chased Ruby into the night. A howl sounded in the distance and Ruby followed it, grateful that it came from the opposite direction from the mansion. She wasn't going after Belle, she was heading into the woods.


	8. Moon Goddess

Here ye be, lovelies! Thanks for the reviews and follows. Enjoy!

Song: Dance With the Wolves by Ruslana (couldn't help myself)

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><p>Blind. Emma was fucking blind. Ruby squinted at another print in the soft dirt of the forest floor, instinctively sniffing to track with her nose where her eyes failed. Of course, she smelled nothing but dirt and moss and her own sweat. She squinted at the print again. It looked different than her own, bigger. There was another wolf in the area, crossing paths with Emma? Ruby shifted uncomfortably, shocked by the surreal experience of fearing another of her kind. She was an alpha without a pack, others acquiesced to her, stayed out of her way in the forest, but only idiots ventured into the woods on a full moon in Storybrooke.<p>

Sucking a deep, steadying breath, Ruby retraced her path to the last paw print Emma had left and began the task of tracking her all over again. She wiped the sweat on her forehead and hooked hands around her hips, resisting the urge to pull the cloak on shoulders around her body like a security blanket. It did nothing for her physically, but her psychological need for it even without the wolf floating beneath her surface disturbed her. She really should have learned control years ago, real control, not just how to remember wolfing out during the full moon. How many others were there in Storybrooke who struggled with their anger, their sexual impulses? How many rapists had they created by failing to take care of their own? Murderers?

Ruby sighed deeply. "I don't know where you are, Emma," she whispered, too distracted by the thoughts of wolves to concentrate.

A twig snapped under the weight of something massive, and Ruby jumped, swallowing roughly. She was so screwed. She had a cape, Emma's strength that she'd already exhausted, and a cell phone with no one to call. Perhaps Belle could have magic flashed, but once she got there, nothing guaranteed her ability to stay connected with the earth long enough with her hormones as screwed up as they were. The next few months were going to be interesting to say the least.

"Come on out," she called, almost knowing instinctively that another wolf occupied the vicinity, not Emma either. Her hackles raised as the massive creature stepped forward. Its coat was a blackish gray like hers, but the wolf was nearly twice her size in wolf form… that said something. It limped slightly, and Ruby saw the pain in the poor thing's eyes. Whoever it was had learned how to maintain his or her human consciousness in wolf form.

"Hey," she cooed and knelt on one knee, holding Emma's body straight and rigid, never dipping below the wolf's eye level. They were equals, and she made sure it was clear. "Can you return to human form while the moon is out?"

The wolf whined and shook its head, sitting back on its hind legs. Ruby nodded and held out a hand. "Hey, you're okay. I'm here to help, okay." She smiled softly and touched her palm to the creature's face. "I'm going to put my cloak around you so we can talk. That okay?" The wolf snorted, dipping its huge snout downwards. Ruby untied the hood and swept it around the creature, prepared to catch whoever it contained.

"Ruby," Jack rasped, his voice not yet human as he returned to his bipedal form and grabbed his shoulder.

"It's Emma, Jack," Ruby answered, trying not to bristle at the fact that she'd just touched her father so tenderly. Of course the other wolf she bumped into was Jack. Her life never unfolded on the simple path.

"No, you're not," he countered as he secured the cloak around his throat. "Only a wolf would talk to another wolf like that. I've been running these woods for over a year now, and you have never once attacked me until tonight."

"How the hell do you know what I look like in wolf form?" Ruby demanded, giving up the façade of being Emma. Acid surged in her veins, but she pulled the dress shirt from her shoulders anyway. She jerked at it with a growl of frustration, but the fabric held firm. Jack grabbed the sleeve and ripped it off for her. "Thanks," she said bitterly and wrapped the sleeve around his mangled bicep.

"You're my daughter, Ruby. I know your scent. I was curious, so I followed you a few nights, just to see," he admitted, not a shred of guilt or regret or shame in his voice.

"That was you?" She wasn't an idiot. She'd known something or someone watched her those nights. It never threatened her, so she barely thought about it, figuring some curious wolfling learned from her habits. There were more wolves in Storybrooke than people thought. Some had enchanted objects such as her cloak to keep them from changing. She'd bumped into a few with no control but never had a chance to track them down because of other imminent death situations in her life. Some had control, like Jack.

"Why are you in Emma's body?" He asked. Ruby jerked the ripped shirt into a tight knot a bit more roughly than necessary, and he winced but held his gaze on her downturned eyes.

"It's a long story," she grunted and wiped her forehead again. "Look, I'm practically defenseless in this body. I can't see, I can't smell anything but dirt and myself. I need to find Emma before she hurts someone."

Jack nodded. "I've been following her from a safe distance for a couple hours now. I knew she wasn't you, so I kept an eye on her. Any creature stupid enough or angry enough to jump on something the size of me without a second thought should be kept track of," he explained calmly and pushed to his feet. He really wasn't what she expected when he'd shown up at the diner that day with his teeth bared and hackles raised. He'd seemed evil, a bad guy. He was neither, and that confused her and pissed her off at the same time.

"Which way?" She asked, pushing the thoughts of her fucked up family to the back of her mind. Her current fucked up family required her attention.

Jack pulled a deep breath into his nose and pointed in the direction she'd been headed. Even in this body, her tracking skills ranked higher than average. That was something. She tripped over a protruding root, and Jack caught her by the arm, steadying her easily with his superior strength. She couldn't fucking see worth shit, though.

"So, how did all this happen?" He asked again, keeping his pace at a moderate walk for the visually challenged body his daughter inhabited.

"You can't tell anyone, Jack. God only knows who else is out there waiting for us to fall apart," Ruby snapped and then swatted at a spider web fervently, pulling sticky strands from her face.

"I'm not going to put you in danger, Little Red. I'm just making conversation. Feel free to change it," he offered quietly, not bothered by her dramatics with the spider web. Ruby froze as icy fingers seized her heart.

"Don't call me that," she seethed, and Jack stopped a few feet ahead, turning to study the rage in his daughter's now green eyes.

"I'm sorry," he apologized, dropping his gaze respectfully to the woman who controlled a wolf much more powerful than his. "Did anyone ever tell you where you got your name? Red, I mean?"

Ruby stared him down, more angry than curious. "Is there any possible way you will do this without speaking?"

He shoved his hands into his pockets, shoulders hunching forward slightly. "If that's what you want," he agreed without an argument and jerked his head in the direction of Emma's scent. Ruby sighed in relief and followed the man who helped bring her into this world. The further they trekked into the woods, the stronger her curiosity grew, though, and about a mile into their silent journey, she sighed and crossed her arms protectively.

"How did I get my name? I always assumed it was because of the red hood," she murmured, knowing his wolf ears picked up every word. She refused to look at the man directly but couldn't help observing him out of the corner of her eye.

He smiled softly. "It's not a pretty story," he warned but gave her no chance to rescind the question. "They used to call me Red Paw, my pack. I was the son of their alpha and inherited the title when he died. They started calling me that when I was a little younger than you are now because by the end of every wolf's time, my paws were always stained red."

"From blood of the things you slaughtered?" Ruby ground out between clenched teeth. She knew where this went, and she regretted asking. She was far more like her father than she cared to admit. She even called Alex "Little Wolf" just as he had called her "Little Red" after himself.

"Animals. People," he confessed absently, the guilt clear in his eyes, which she finally studied openly. "It didn't matter much to me what it was as long as I sated that rage in my heart. Every wolf's time, I thought it would be the last, that I'd finally quench that thirst for blood, and by the end of those three days, I thought I had." He tapered off, and Ruby held herself more tightly, knowing exactly what happened during the days in between.

"It builds all over again, that urge to run. It's primal: the urge to kill, violence," she summarized, understanding her father far more than she ever wanted.

"Anita was only part wolf. Your grandfather was human, like your Belle." His voice softened as he spoke of his dead wife. "She didn't really understand the blood thirst, the urge."

"Yes, she did," Ruby contradicted, her voice tired from the memory of her mother's last moments. "I killed her because she couldn't control it. It was an accident, but if I had to do it over again, I'd still make the same decision. She was dangerous, and her pack was dangerous."

He stopped, touching a hand to her crossed arms. The grief in his eyes only riled her anger. "You killed Anita?" She nodded, not daring to speak or glance away from his eyes. "Did she suffer?" She shook her head and started walking again.

"Not long," she clipped. Her last few breaths in this world were used to tell Ruby how much of a disappointment she'd been. The memory ached in her heart. Sometimes, she even believed the very false words of worthlessness her mother had uttered against her in her dying breath.

"May she always run free beneath the moon's pale light," he murmured, touching the inside of a fist to his mouth and pressing it towards the moon just barely visible above the tree line. Day would break soon, and they still hadn't found Emma.

"Is that like a wolf thing? She said that when one of her pack was killed," Ruby asked, curiosity completely covering her anger. She burned with questions for the man she never thought she'd meet. Until a few months ago, he'd been dead to her, literally. Granny always claimed he'd been killed by hunters.

"It was something we made up, your mother and I," he clarified, a hint of a smile on his lips. "We talked about what we wanted our version of the afterlife to be like, or heaven as they might call it in this world. It was a neverending night of full moons, where we never had to hide, never had to conform to the constraints and laws of society. Just us and the moon and a forest."

Ruby smiled at the dreamy tint to his voice, the slight glaze in his eyes. It sounded wonderful, never hiding, never running to escape something but for the sake of being in motion. "Sounds amazing," she agreed, slightly dreamy herself.

"Doesn't it? I don't know that you'd be happy there, but you would definitely be welcome. Although, I think you and 'Nita would go a round or two about who was actually in charge," he teased her, laughing a little at the thought.

"You think I would have been an alpha to both of my parents?" The thought sounded ridiculous to her, but Jack obviously knew more about the wolf world than she.

"You're not a leader because you choose to be, Ruby. You're a leader because that's who you are. Your wolf, your strength, it surpasses any I've ever seen, and I'll admit, it's a little scary to think about you losing control of it. I can't imagine Emma's struggle to contain it right now, it's impossible. There is a type of magic in us, Ruby, but it's not as blatant and obvious as Regina's blood magic or learned like Belle's earth magic.

"It's an inherent magic linked to the moon, the earth. Legend says that the first wolf was created when the Moon Goddess found wolves to be magnificent creatures. They called to her, worshipped her, longed for her when she disappeared during the waning lunar cycles. She became so obsessed with these creatures that she turned one into a man during the time when her fertility was highest."

"The day before, of, and after the full moon," Ruby murmured, enchanted by the tale.

Jack nodded. "Yes, but the Moon Goddess, so enthralled by the thought of her wolf lover failed to realize that she chose to sate her passion for the creature during the fourth blood moon, a celestial sign of change, of hope."

"That's the fourth lunar eclipse in a row, right?" Ruby clarified.

"Yes, it has been observed also in this world's religions, but it originated with the wolves. So, the Moon Goddess ignored this sign or used it intentionally to create a whole new race, no one really knows for sure. All through the fourth blood moon, she remained in his arms, waves of ecstasy crashing into her as they made love. As a man, he worshipped her body as his wolf worshipped the moon, but the wolf needed to run under the moon, even as a man he felt the urge.

"He longed to run under so desperately that his passion turned to rage towards the Moon Goddess. And as he came closer to climax, the stronger his wolf clawed to be free, turning violent in his attentions towards the goddess. He turned back into a wolf as he filled her with the seed that would eventually become her child, the first werewolf, the first of our bloodline."

"Why do all of our stories end in bestiality?" Ruby laughed, uncomfortable with how much the myth actually explained.

Jack chuckled. "Well, we are part wolf. It's difficult not to go there," he brushed it off. "Though, I will say that making love is much more fun in human form. Less fur."

"Oh eww, I don't even want to know if that's how I was conceived," Ruby blurted, grimacing at the thought of trying to do anything sexual in wolf form.

Jack chuckled. "When the urge strikes, it strikes hard, I suppose," he defended with a shrug, certain that Ruby went through her wild child period at some point.

"Sex and rage, no wonder our partners have to be so strong," Ruby murmured, her mind drifting back to the tale of their origin, almost like she could see it if she looked deeply enough inside herself. She knew it to be true on some level, felt it in her blood, even in Emma's body.

"So, that's why we can infect other people with bites and blood?" She asked, seeking guidance from the man she never dreamed of meeting.

"The magic of the moon remains as long as the moon remains. The goddess wants to be worshipped by as many as possible, and some of us are slaves to her wishes," he confessed with that dreamy look in his eyes again as he raised them towards the silver object in question. "The child the wolf gave her stayed with her for 13 years until the urge to run upon the earth grew so strong that she released her daughter into the mortal world to start her own pack."

"Which is why we begin changing when we're 13," Ruby put all the pieces together, and Jack smiled, bringing his gaze to his daughter's pensive face.

"Yes, and the reason most of our alphas are female," he confirmed and then stopped her with a hand on her shoulder.

"Really?" Ruby's voice dropped, displaying her incredulity as if her shocked expression wasn't enough. Her mother acted as alpha. Jack bowed to her superiority.

"Really," Jack confirmed, his eyes saying something that he hadn't yet shared. Ruby may have been blessed with the embodiment of the goddess' child, just as their lore prophesied. Wolf and human equals within one body, just as the child had been. The strength of a goddess, the heart of woman, the courage of a wolf. He shook his head, clearing the thought away to bring up in a less dire moment.

"Emma is about 30 feet ahead. She's made a kill," he warned, catapulting them back to reality.

"We should do this fast. The moon is fading," he whispered and untied the string at his throat. "I can subdue her for a moment, but your wolf is much stronger than me and I'm already injured."

"This body is pretty fast. I'll be about 30 seconds behind you," Ruby whispered, knowing Emma probably already picked up on their movement. Jack stared straight ahead, hands slowly moving to the fabric upon his shoulders.

"You won't have to be. Emma's coming to us," he cautioned. A low growl rumbled beneath his words, and Ruby's head jerked towards the sound, blonde curls bouncing around her shoulders. She swallowed the bile rising in her throat as she took in her friend's appearance in wolf form. Damn she was a fucking big ass wolf. A dark liquid dripped from her jowls, teeth bared in a snarl. It terrified her, knowing her strength, her rage.

Her trembling hands caught the cloak as Jack tossed it at her. Emma began her death-charge, and he stepped in front of her as he changed into canine form. His wolf collided with her as she leapt for Ruby in her own body. Ruby danced around them, looking for an opening. Emma slapped jack down with a powerful paw, immediately pouncing atop him, going for his throat. Ruby held her breath and jumped on Emma's back, wrapping both arms and legs around strong back of her wolf to keep the cloak in place. Jack squirmed from beneath them, circling the two women.

"Emma, it's Ruby. Stop fighting me," she ordered as a human form appeared beneath her on the ground. Emma wriggled and squirmed for another few seconds and then fell still as the words registered in her suddenly human brain.

"Ruby?" came a muffled voice beneath her, and Ruby slowly lifted herself off Emma and knelt beside her.

"Hey, you're okay, Ems," Ruby soothed and held the red fabric tightly against Emma's shoulders as she sat up, completely disoriented. She tied the string at her throat and pulled the hood tighter around Emma's shoulders.

"What the hell happened? Why are we in the woods?" Emma asked, touching the wetness on her face. Horror passed over her features as the tangy iron of blood registered on her taste buds. "Oh god, who did I kill?" Suddenly, everything made sense. She'd transformed in Ruby's body after attacking her in the bar, but everything after that hid in a giant memory void that she'd probably never recover.

"I don't know, probably an animal. We'll go look in a minute," Ruby said distractedly as she checked over her own body for injuries. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah," Emma murmured and shook her head. "Yeah, I'm okay," she stated more firmly, and Ruby pulled them both to their feet. Emma stiffened as Jack stalked into her line of sight, and Ruby tightened her arm about her thin shoulders.

"It's Jack. It's okay, he has control," she assured her friend. "He's been following you most of the night." Emma tossed an arm over her shoulders, using the slight height difference to her advantage and leaned heavily upon her own body. Ruby bore the extra weight gracefully, even in the weaker body, and looked at Jack. "Hey, will you find Emma's kill and make sure it's something safe for her to see?"

Jack snorted and loped towards the thicket obscuring their line of sight from whatever Emma killed. They followed at a slower pace, waiting until he emerged. He nodded and then turned back to the carcass. Emma doubled over and puked her guts out. Ruby covered her mouth and tried not to laugh. Jack sat on his haunches and whined, concerned for Emma's wellbeing.

"Well, at least we know you like deer," Ruby quipped, finding far more amusement than she should in this situation. Emma glared up at her and then spit the residual bile and saliva from her mouth. She dry heaved and then groaned.

"I'm never eating meat again," she vowed, heaving once more before gathering her wits and standing up straight again. Her body wobbled and shook, and Ruby slipped under her arm again, supporting some of her weight before Emma fell over from shock.

"Jack, I'm a little turned around, could you lead us out of the woods?" She felt so unbalanced in this body, so out of tune with the forest around her. Jack snorted again and trotted a few feet ahead of them while Emma spit and gagged. By the time they reached the edge of the forest, the poor woman in the wolf's body calmed and fell silent. By the time they reached the mayoral mansion, her mood turned somber and sour.

"I ate a deer," she muttered, disgusted.

"The important thing is that you didn't hurt anyone," Ruby reminded her, leading her up the sidewalk to the front door. It opened before they reached the stoop, and Belle ran out to meet them dressed in Ruby's old clothes once again instead of her pajamas. Sneakers slapped softly against the stone, and Ruby gladly opened her free arm to accept her fiancée's warmth against her.

"Are you alright, Emma?" She asked, blanching a bit at the blood covering her friend's face and chest. Emma nodded, unable to look at Belle's concerned blue eyes from the embarrassment and revulsion towards herself burning in her chest.

"She's fine, babe. Could you run upstairs and run a bath in her room?" Ruby took the reins gently, trying to preserve what dignity she had left. "Where's Regina?"

Belle sighed deeply, and Ruby knew that more happened between the two while she chased Emma through the woods. "After insulting me, Eva, Lauren and Snow more times than I care to revisit, she finally went downstairs with Katy."

"Okay, we'll worry about her in the morning," Ruby decided, and Belle nodded before walking ahead of them to run Emma's bath. She smiled sadly at the two when they reached the bathroom in Emma and Regina's room and quickly dismissed herself without looking at Emma directly, giving her as much respect and privacy as possible.

"I ate a deer," Emma repeated, and Ruby chuckled while she clipped her hair up to keep it dry. It would be washed when the sun returned to the sky. She cut the shirt Emma wore all the way from hem to collar and snipped the bra in the middle, leaving Emma to discard the rest of her clothes with her back turned since they could be removed without removing the cloak.

Ruby held out the worn fabric as Emma stepped into the tub and then let it billow to the floor as Emma sat with her back against the side to keep the cape dry. Ruby tossed a washcloth into the steamy water and then wet another in the sink and squatted to hand it to Emma. "Wash your face off. You don't want to take a bath in blood." Emma nodded and obeyed. When she handed the cloth back to Ruby, she rubbed at a couple spots Emma missed.

"Thanks, Ruby," she whispered, tears in her eyes. Ruby gritted her teeth. Nothing she said was going to make Emma feel any better. It was hard to exist within society when you did things like run through the woods and eat wild animals you've chased down.

"Do you want me to give you some space?" Ruby asked.

Emma nodded but touched her arm, not quite ready for her to leave just yet. "Will you stay with me the rest of the night?"

Ruby covered the wet hand with her own and squeezed lightly. "Sure. I'm just going to go get into some pajamas and say goodnight to Belle. I'll wait in your room, okay?" Emma nodded, satisfied with that plan.

She listened to Ruby's footsteps move around the house and numbly ran the cloth Ruby tossed into the tub without putting soap on it. She could have cared less about smelling good and killing germs as long as she got the dirt and blood off of her skin. She pulled the plug quickly and slipped a towel between her and the cloak, keeping it as dry as possible as she brushed her teeth and rinsed several times with mouthwash. She stared at the tooth brush for a really long time before dropping it into the small trashcan beside the toilet and turning away from it before she puked again.

Ruby sat patiently on the bed with a pair of shorts and a tank top ready for her friend when she finally emerged from the confined room. Emma slipped into them, uncaring that they stuck to her damp skin and slipped into the bed, laying on her back and staring straight up at the ceiling. Ruby laid on her side, head propped in her hand, and studied the other woman.

"Emma?" She whispered. She knew exactly how the other woman felt and, at the same time, had no clue what to say. Emma sniffed, her eyes flicking back and forth as the thoughts of what else she might have done during her black out and self-loathing consumed her. How was she supposed to show her face in town again? People knew that wolves killed when they lost control. The fact that it was a deer accomplished little in the way of easing that shame. She was an animal, not really human, but her emotions felt real, felt human, felt exactly as she felt in her own body.

"I ate a fucking deer, Ruby," she repeated for the third time. "Are you sure I didn't hurt anyone?" A tremor of fear rattled her voice, caught in her throat, and she cleared it angrily. She'd never asked for this.

"I don't think so, Emma. Jack said you attacked him hours ago. He followed you for hours," Ruby soothed her with the knowledge she had. She felt positive that Emma hadn't hurt anyone besides Jack's arm, but she also knew the paralyzing fear and guilt that came with a blackout. Emma would only feel better once she woke up in the harsh light of day and made certain no one fell victim to her lack of control.

"Ems, I'm so sorry. I should have prepared you better for the rage. It's always there, the cloak only dulls it. I'm used to it, so it seems like it completely gets rids of it, but it doesn't," Ruby apologized, touching her friend's shoulder lightly, not wanting to crowd the woman.

Emma rolled onto her side and pressed her forehead into her own chest worn by another woman. Silent tears shook her shoulders, and Ruby wrapped her up in tender, understanding arms. There was no judgment, not when Ruby knew exactly how she felt, exactly what she thought. They both allowed hot tears to leak onto their faces and drifted off in the comfort of not really being alone anymore.


	9. Living Together Apart

Thank you for the reviews, My Darlings.

Surt, I do not have any original works published yet. I do have an original novel up on fictionpress under the same pen name if you care to take a gander, and I am currently working on turning The Color Red into an original that I'll probably put on Amazon as an ebook and see if I can sell the thing, but for now, that's it.

Enjoy!

Songs: Warrior by Beth Crowley (Ruby & Katy), Remind Me By Brad Paisley and Carrie Underwood (this video is a perfect representation of how I see RB in my mind… aside from Carrie Underwood tromping about like an ox trying to be sexy, but once you get past that, beautiful video…mmm Brad can move his hips though. *fans self*)

* * *

><p>Emma groaned. "No, no, no." She grabbed at the device beside the bed blaring some sort of melancholy melody as loud as it possibly could. Emma grabbed it, squinting at the bright screen. "Rubes, why is Granny calling at 4:59 in the morning?"<p>

"Because the sun rose one minute ago. She expects you to be in at six. Might as well answer it, just be your grumpy self. I usually am the morning after running," she instructed, already up and picking crust from her eyes. They couldn't have been asleep more than an hour. "I'm sorry, Ems."

"Has it always been this way?" Emma asked and silenced the phone.

Ruby laughed harshly. "Unless I'm in the hospital."

Emma held a hand over her gurgling stomach. "I don't want to go," she whined. Bile climbed her throat and saliva flooded her mouth. Great.

"Deer makes you really sick if you eat it like that. You didn't bother eating around the stomach or anything… There's a trashcan right…" Emma leaned over the bed and puked into the double-bagged can, heaving for all it's worth. "…there," Ruby finished lamely.

The phone rang again, and Ruby snatched it up. "Hello?" She feigned ignorance. "Oh Granny, good morning. No, Ruby can't come to the phone right now." She held out the device and punched the speaker button as Emma regurgitated raw deer meat and organs. When she pressed it against her ear again without the speaker, she said, "Sorry, Ruby said to tell you that she had a blackout last night and must have eaten a deer because that's the only thing that makes her really sick. She's been puking for a couple hours, hasn't slept at all. I'm going to call Tink for her after I get off the phone with you and have her pull a double today if she's interested. If not, she said she'd be in for the evening shift."

She ended the call and studied Emma with empathy. "I'll call Tink. She'll take care of it, but you better get your ass ready to work the full 15 hours tomorrow. She's pulled this entire weekend on her own. She needs a couple days off."

Emma's grunted, mouth open in disbelief. "She's pulled this entire weekend because a crazy person abducted you and tortured you the day your diner reopened. Not to mention, Belle just got back. You need a couple days to love on her."

Emma's protests made perfect sense to her, and Ruby smiled distantly. "I intend to. I just won't be in the right body at the time, which means we won't get distracted by sex. How far can I go, by the way? Can I kiss her?"

Emma leaned her head over the bed and dry heaved, wishing she would just puke more. She groaned at the sight of the regurgitated raw meat and covered her head with both hands, still hanging half off the bed as she answered, "I really don't care. I didn't have a problem with it in the first place, but after last night, I really don't give a fuck what Regina wants. No tongue and don't put my lips against nipples or genitals, please, or my fingers for that matter."

"I'm not going to have sex with Belle in your body, Emma. It's actually kind of nice to not be in a constant state of arousal," she murmured distractedly. She smiled shyly and rubbed the back of her neck. "I've never felt like a woman before. I mean, you know what I mean, right?"

Emma smiled, her stomach suddenly forgotten. Ruby led a stressful life of solitude, even surrounded by people who loved her more than anything. She knew exactly what Ruby meant. Her wolf was always present, always a concern, always lurking just beneath the surface. Ruby had begun accepting that, which made control easier, but even her own face showed how free Ruby felt in her body.

"Go be with Belle," she encouraged. "Don't worry about Alex, I'll keep an eye on her today. Maybe you could go to the cabin, figure out stuff for your little ones on the way." She smiled again. Emma wanted to do this for Ruby. She needed this time with her lover, just as she'd given her time to reconcile with Regina. For all the good that had done. They so needed to talk, but right then, it hurt far too much.

"What about Regina? She's not acting like herself," Ruby said, practically reading her thoughts. Duty always weighed heavily on her mind.

"I'll survive a day without you," Emma assured her, watching the hope and yearning spread on her own facial features. Ruby really wanted this. Emma wiggled her fingers and flexed Ruby's thigh muscle. "Plus, I think I'm pretty much healed."

Ruby grinned smugly. "Yeah, wolf's time expedites the healing process."

"Cool." Emma glowed, impressed by the natural strength of her body. "Go on, I'll be fine."

"If you need me, my phone will be on," she compromised in a voice that told Emma she better damn well use it if she needed backup. Emma nodded and waved her off as she turned back to the trash can. Bile crept up slowly, and she waited impatiently for the heaving. "Okay, Alex will be up around seven. We'll stick around and make breakfast and stuff. I'm sure Belle will want to see her this morning."

Emma waved her off again without glancing up. She just wanted to vomit in peace and then take a shower to finish washing the previous night off of her. Ruby called Tink on her way to the room she shared with Belle and explained the situation. Tink seemed more than happy to take the extra hours. Maybe Emma was right, maybe she never needed to be so generous with her time when people clearly wanted to be helpful any way possible. She turned the phone off and slipped into the dim room.

Belle stirred in the bed, pulling frizzy hair from her face and blinking sleepily up at her. "Emma, what's wrong?" She rasped and cleared her throat.

Ruby smiled and slipped into the bed. "It's Ruby in here, remember?" She reminded the bleary brain that rarely stopped. Belle hummed and touched a hand to her hair as Ruby slipped beneath the blanket and raised her shirt. Giggling, Belle peaked beneath the blanket when Ruby pressed tiny kisses across her belly.

"Ruby Lucas, what on earth are you doing?" She asked, not nearly as irritated as she sounded.

"I'm loving on my babies and their beautiful mother," she answered and held her lips against the skin just above Belle's navel, eyes fluttering closed under the heavy emotion of what grew beneath that perfect skin. "Hi babies, I don't know if you have ears yet, but I'm going to talk to you anyway." She kissed Belle's stomach again.

Belle laughed, unable to stop smiling and suddenly awake and rejuvenated. "They have ears. They're only about the size of a bean right now, but they have ears."

"My little jelly beans," Ruby happily dubbed them and ran her hands reverently over Belle's sides as she settled between her legs to kiss her belly some more.

"Ruby," Belle whispered seriously, and she raised her head slowly. She knew that look and levered Emma's body on her hands until she laid beside her lover. It was slightly less graceful than her wolf, but the second her legs tangled with Belle's and their lips touched, she couldn't have cared less about how graceful she looked.

"Is Emma okay with this?" Belle murmured against her lips, conscious of their situation but caring less every moment.

"No tongue, no sex," Ruby clarified, peppering kisses over her jaw. She lingered on her scar for an extra second and felt Belle smile beneath the attention.

"I want blueberry-banana pancakes," Belle whispered, and Ruby laughed and pressed her forehead to Belle's temple. She rubbed her hand over Belle's belly, grinning like a fool.

"Only if you also drink one of those power smoothies that I used to make Regina," Ruby bargained.

"Ruuuby," Bell whined, wrapping her hand around her neck to hold her close. "Make me pancakes," she bade and made her eyes so wide that Ruby literally melted into her body like pudding.

"Drink the smoothie," she held much firmer on the outside than she felt on the inside, and Belle flipped their positions, straddling her hips. The thought of touching Emma's body unnerved her at first, but Ruby still called to her, in her soul. The body mattered very little, she realized. She wanted her no matter what she looked like or how strong she was.

"Fine. I'll drink the smoothie," Belle agreed and kissed her. Ruby's hands trailed up her thighs, settling on her hips. Belle jerked back abruptly and dismounted faster than she'd ever seen her lover move. Ruby followed her to the bathroom, resigning herself to the fact that her perfect morning had started with two puking people she loved dearly. She was grateful that her sensitive nose was attached to another person at the moment.

"Baby, can I help?" She asked and pulled Belle's hair back. She snagged a hair tie from the sink and secured the frizzy blonde hair. Belle shook her head, heaving with nothing expelling. Ruby rubbed her back, soothing her.

She reached up, flushed the toilet, and then folded her arms over the seat to rest her forehead. Her shoulders shook silently with tears, and Ruby kissed her shoulder. "I don't deserve these babies," Belle lamented.

Ruby kissed the side of her head, wrapping an arm around her shoulders and stomach. "Belle, just because you had an abortion, it doesn't mean that you shouldn't be a mother." She'd known this shoe would fall eventually, and the relief hit her harder than expected. She suspected the guilt would never really go away the day she'd held Belle's hand as Addison took the child Lacey made with Gold from existence. She felt it, too. That was her child, too.

"Belle, I know this is hard and I know that you feel ten times worse than I do, but I'm never going to regret these babies. They're not a replacement or a second chance or anything like that. They're ours, and they're beautiful, and they deserve a mother exactly like you," Ruby declared with such conviction that Belle raised her red eyes to her lover's.

Ruby covered her lips with three fingers, stopping the counterargument before it rolled over Belle's tongue. "We don't have to forget, Baby. We just have to keep moving forward. Just look at Alex. We can do this. We're good at this. I know that we're going to fuck up, but those mistakes are important, too. We might fuck 'em up, but at least they'll be fucked up and unafraid to make a mistake, take a chance."

The librarian melted into her lover, burrowing into her chest. Ruby held her patiently, waiting for the moment to pass. Belle's strength amazed them all, she'd find a way to move past this. "That's one way to look at it, I guess. I'm worried about Alex. We need to check with Dr. Hopper and make sure that her behaviors are normal for the amount of trauma she's seen. Children detect tension far more easily than we think."

"I agree," Ruby jumped onto the same page. They could do this. One day at a time, one baby step after another, pun completely intended. "Want me to call and schedule an appointment?"

Belle shook her head. "I'll do it. You have enough to worry about right now. Any particular time better for your schedule?"

Ruby shrugged. "I'm in Emma's body. Don't really have much to do at the moment." It was kind of nice. She made a mental note to take more time off, to spend more time with Belle and Alex and her wolf when she finally got her body back.

"I keep forgetting. It's disconcerting how easily I am adjusting to you this way," Belle shared her concerns and pushed Ruby back with soft hands on her shoulders. Ruby nodded, understanding exactly what she meant. "Do you miss your wolf?"

Ruby bit her lip, remembering the beautiful story Jack shared only a few hours ago. Slowly, she nodded. "The break to just recover from the shock of the past few days is nice without dealing with the full moon and the diner and life in general, but it's… missing, ya know."

"It's a part of you as magic has become a part of me," Belle empathized. She felt the earth's energy, wrapped it around herself for comfort when she felt vulnerable. She imagined without that comfort, she'd feel empty, off-kilter, like she was missing something intangible, something she only found within herself.

"Yeah, and I feel really bad for Emma." She strained her ears to see if any sounds came from the master bedroom, but Emma's ears weren't equipped for such things. "I need to spend more time with my wolf," she said suddenly, giving up on stretching the senses of the regular human body surrounding her.

"What do you mean? Running or…" Belle searched for understanding that Ruby felt certain she'd not ever truly achieve.

"I'm not sure how to explain it. I need to connect with the earth in a completely visceral way. Dirt under my nails and all that, to feel it physically the way I feel it in my soul. I think it's the key to controlling the rage," she explained in terms she hoped the genius understood.

"You need the earth like I need to slake my compulsion for knowledge," Belle connected the need to the closest thing she had. "I'm not sure who I am without my books," she finished with a quiet smile.

Ruby nodded. "Something like that, yeah."

"Maybe you need a farm," Belle half-joked, and Ruby snorted, a smile spreading on her lips. The librarian shrugged, grinning up at her fiancée. Ruby leaned forward to kiss her, but Belle covered her mouth with her palm. "I just puked. I'd really prefer you not to taste that when you kissed me."

"I'll give you a minute," she whispered and stood before helping Belle to her feet. "What kind of tea would you like?"

"Peppermint or ginger. Helps with nausea," she murmured and leaned over the sink to splash water onto her face. "Ruby," she stopped her just outside the room, and Ruby turned around, giving her full attention to the other woman. "I love you."

"I love you more," Ruby proclaimed with a wink and flitted away before. She found the kitchen blissfully empty and kept on smiling to herself as she put on the kettle and started the coffee. The new container still had the plastic seal on it, and she felt ashamed as she jerked in vein. Emma's fingers worked differently than hers, stiffer and definitely weaker.

"Good morning," a deep voice rumbled into her ear a moment before hands grasped Emma's firm, braless breasts from behind. Ruby jumped, coffee grounds flew everywhere, and Regina cursed.

"I'm sorry, Wolf Pup," she laughed and then grabbed her head. "You're wearing my wife's body," she explained, and Ruby relaxed, believing the sincerity in the words. It was 5:30, after all. Regina seemed to be in a much better mood than yesterday, even slightly hung over, but Ruby knew for a fact that it wasn't over. Alcohol never hid who a person was, what they thought; it revealed it.

And Regina revealed more than The Queen ever wanted anyone to know.

She let it go for the moment since Regina seemed chipper and calm instead of brooding and snappy. "Coffee will be ready in a few. I'm making pancakes and a smoothie for Belle. It will help with your head if you want one, too."

"Thank you," Regina said, reserved, as though the previous night may have finally returned. At the very least, she picked up on Ruby's lingering anger and disappointment. She sat at the table quietly and watched the woman move her wife's body around the kitchen like she owned it, like Ruby would have. Emma's skill in the kitchen usually left a mess and a fire alarm blaring.

Belle entered the silent, tense kitchen a few minutes later, looking far less pale and sickly than when Ruby left her. She raised an eyebrow at Regina and then sidled up to Ruby and kissed her shoulder. "We need to go shopping," she informed the wolf, resting her chin on her shoulder as she stirred pancake batter she'd whipped up from scratch.

"For?" Ruby asked.

"My breasts have swollen beyond the capacity of comfort, and I refuse to confine them in bras that no longer fit," she explained in her logical, matter-of-fact way that made Ruby chuckle. "And, what is it you say? My headlights are on?"

Ruby chuckled and turned her head to kiss Belle's forehead. "Okay, we'll go after Alex gets up." Ruby practically chirped, softness in Emma's green eyes as she stared down at her lover.

"I have a few nursing bras that would probably fit if you wanted them for the moment," Regina murmured, darkness in her voice. She stood and crossed to the coffee pot, removing the carafe so that the stream dripped directly into her cup.

The elder witch shoved the carafe into the appliance harder than necessary, scooting it on the marble. "Top drawer of my dresser. There is also Shea butter lotion atop it that relieved some of the soreness from the stretching. You know the way to my room, I believe," she snapped and stalked out of the kitchen.

Belle followed, angrier than the other two about Regina's behavior. They'd not heard the awful things she said after arriving at the mansion the previous night. "Suddenly you're incredibly interested in helping me with my pregnancy," she barked, crossing her arms beneath her aching breasts and glaring at the woman who stopped but had yet to turn to face her in the foyer.

"Go away, Bookworm," Regina threatened.

"I intend to as soon as the paperwork goes through for our house," Belle swore. "And I'll be sure to take the abominations growing in my belly with me," she spat, not allowing Regina a free pass as Ruby and Emma would have.

"Regina, what the hell?" Ruby interjected, hurt by the implication of what had transpired with Regina's tongue loosened by the alcohol.

"Don't puff up your chest at me, Wolf. Go back to the kitchen and enjoy your perfect pancakes with your perfect pregnancy," she scathed and stomped towards the basement, her safe place, the only place the other three hadn't gone yet.

Belle moved to follow her, but Ruby held her shoulders. "Don't. I'll go," she said, sadness in her voice. Belle looked at her in confusion. How had Ruby gone from righteous anger to sympathy in two seconds? The dented kettle whistled in the kitchen. "Go have your tea, Baby. I'll be back in a minute."

Ruby opened the door to the basement, not surprised to find Regina sitting halfway down the stairs. She closed it, shrouding them in darkness without the morning light aiding the dimmer artificial light coming from the basement. She sat on the step, snug in the narrow space beside her friend.

"Regina," she started but stopped when a quiet sob followed the use of her name. Ruby removed the cup of hot liquid from her hands and sat it on the steps behind her. She wrapped her arms around the grieving sorceress and pulled her tightly against her chest. "I'm sorry."

"I can't do this anymore," she confessed, clutching at her shirt. Ruby's throat ached with tears of her own, and she swallowed them. She and Belle were everything she and Emma had been in Salem. They both got to experience the pregnancy and do silly things like shop for comfortable bras and complain about aching breasts. Emma missed all that. Ruby had been a decent substitute, but she was still just that: a substitute. Just as this version of Emma served as a substitute for the woman she married. Regina had lost more than any of them.

"Attacking us won't make it easier, Mama Bear," Ruby reminded her.

"I don't even recall saying those awful things to Belle. I love your children as my own, Ruby. I love Alex and I can't wait to meet the mongrels in Belle's belly," she declared, using the term to lighten the mood if that was possible. Ruby's lips tugged upward but never quite reached a grin. She relaxed in Regina's fierce embrace, though.

"I know, Regina, but you've got to stop lashing out at us because you're in pain. We're all in pain, and we need to help each other through it or we're going to fall apart, as a family and as individuals." Ruby stroked her hair, rocking to and fro in no specific rhythm. "I won't lose anyone else, and that includes you."

"Help me save Katy, Wolf Pup," Regina begged, sitting up to find her eyes in the darkness. For whatever reason, Regina fixated on the teenager instead of herself, and Ruby knew that helping the girl who betrayed them was the only way they'd help Regina. "I don't want to lose anyone else either. Katy is my daughter. I feel it just as I felt it with Henry and Annabel." She pressed a hand to her chest, nails clawing at the fabric of her pajama top unconsciously.

"I knew it the moment she appeared that day with instruction of Captain's final wishes, and I know it now. She's mine, Ruby, just like you knew with Alexandra. Please don't abandon my daughter because she'd made grave mistakes." Her face dropped, and grief clawed at Ruby's chest, trying desperately to escape, to express itself. "Without Emma, you are my only source of comfort. My wife is gone, but you're still here. I need you. I can't help her without you."

"Okay," she promised without hesitation and tucked a shock of black hair behind Regina's ear. She held her palm to Regina's cheek tenderly, brushing away tears as they tumbled onto her cheek. "Okay," she repeated and kissed Regina's forehead. "I've got you, Mama Bear. Was this coffee for her?" Regina nodded and dropped her face into her hands. "Okay, I'll take it to her. Just sit tight for a minute."

"Thank you," Regina breathed, relief so palpable that she felt physically lighter.

Ruby squeezed her shoulder as she stood and disappeared into the basement with the cooling caffeine. She stopped just outside Katy's room and gulped several deep breaths, calming her racing heart. The young woman a few feet away nearly killed Granny, burned down her diner, revealed her fiancée's most painful and damaging secret, helped kidnap and torture Lauren for two weeks, indirectly led to Emma's amnesia, possibly blew up Amelia's apartment and nearly burned Eva to death, that's not mentioning the 14 slaughtered Council members and the nurse, Patricia, at the Sheriff's Station… the list ran on in Ruby's head. She gritted her teeth. She'd rather have slung the hot coffee in her face than handed it to her.

With a straight back, she stepped around the corner and into view of the girl sitting on the edge of her bed, blank expression on her features. "I almost thought you wouldn't come in," Katy said without looking up or changing her expression at all.

"I almost didn't," Ruby returned and held the coffee out to the teenager. She'd caused so much damage, so much pain, put the children Belle carried at risk, the daughter they already had.

"Thanks, Emma," she murmured as she took the coffee and sipped it. "Would you sit for a minute?" She asked cautiously, aware of the thin ice upon which she skated.

"No, but I'll stand," Ruby compromised and crossed her arms over her chest defensively.

Katy nodded, gaze falling to the black liquid sloshing in her trembling hand. "I don't know what to say to…" She stopped. "No words can't fix this," she amended and sat the coffee on her nightstand before she spilled it all over her legs.

"No, they can't," Ruby seethed, reaching the end of her rope within the first minute of the girl's presence.

"Ruby's going to take Alex from me." She clasped her hands between her thighs tightly, the physical manifestation of holding herself together. "Half of what I did was to protect her, and I'm never going to see her again once they move out."

Ruby jerked at the surged of adrenaline ripping through her system. "What the hell are you talking about?"

Katy winced at the harsh tone, collapsing her shoulders towards her chest, protecting herself. "Ben threatened to hurt Alex. I told him I was finished after what happened with your accident, the day Belle left. He said he'd rape her, torture her, if I didn't go through with everything. I don't know if he meant it or said it to scare me into submission, but I couldn't take that chance." She finally looked up into Emma's watery green eyes.

Ruby digested the new information, holding her arms stiffly across her chest like a shield. Katy pulled her knees to her chest. Scrapes that couldn't have been more than a few days old scabbed at her knees, and Ruby dropped her gaze to the floor. Heat flushed her chest, made it difficult to breathe properly. She really never wanted to know where or how Katy acquired the superficial injuries. She'd been protected within a hospital room in the psych wing, or so they'd thought. Ben played them the entire time. Who knew what he'd done to her while they stood right on the other side of the door?

"I loosened the drain on Amelia's sink so that it would leak the night before the accident. She told me that she was going to make Belle a hair potion the next morning," Katy said after a long pause. "I knew that he messed with her ingredients. So, I watched the next morning until she started brewing and then slipped in and poured a gallon jug of water down the sink to distract her from the explosion."

"That's why you were so late getting upstairs that morning," Ruby remembered that day clearly. "You weren't running your exercises, you were running back from town." Katy nodded and hid her face in her knees.

"I made sure no one died," Katy rasped into her knees and then raised her eyes to search Emma's face. "I don't know why your car exploded when you crossed the line, Emma. I never touched it. I cut the gas line on the Camry, but I never touched your cruiser. I don't… The Council, maybe, or Gold. I don't know who did that or how. I mean, how can a spell be that specific?"

"Have you told Regina?" Ruby asked, her throat constricting with emotions.

Katy shook her head. "I'm afraid she won't believe me. Why should she? I've done so many horrible things, why not that?" She had made despicable decisions, but she never directly engaged in the act of harming them. She protected them from the other side. The new knowledge jumbled her emotions about the entire situation. Granted, they could have protected her if she'd simply revealed her secret, but how many times had she kept things from Belle and Regina and Emma in order to protect them? To handle it on her own?

"You weren't supposed to get hurt, Emma. Neal, Jason… I'd never met them until the day I followed you to the park. I only realized that Ben was behind it when he came to my hospital room later that day after you and Regina left." She sniffed and wiped at hot, wet cheeks with callused fingers. "We were really close, Emma, and now…" she shrugged and pressed her mouth into her knee.

"You miss her," Ruby finished, voice cracking and squeaking with emotion and tears. "Older Emma, I mean. You said in the hospital that I was the deal. That Alex and I were supposed to be spared if you went through with it."

"That was the deal from the start," Katy muttered, angry at Ben for lying, angry at herself for believing him, angry at her heart for missing him. She raised her eyes abruptly, searching for guidance. "Do you think Ruby would let me see Alex sometimes if she knew? Would it change anything?"

"I don't know," Ruby scraped and spun from the room so quickly that she nearly fell into the door frame. Katy never followed or called after her. Regina only looked up at her ashen face and red eyes and allowed her to pass without a word. The more she uncovered about this entire situation, the less she wanted to know. Reality slapped that option from the table. Belle was right. They'd failed her.

And it changed everything.


	10. Memories

Just remember that I am sadistic… and read to the end. Enjoy! *wicked grin*

Songs: Blank Space/Style mash-up by Louisa Wendorff and Devin Dawson (this song is pure crack. I didn't even like either of the originals, but this… this is perfection)

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><p>"Wolf," Alex whispered and shook her mother's shoulder gently. "Wolf, I'm a doctor now."<p>

Emma rubbed a hand over her face, trying to figure out why her niece called her by her mother's name. It all came crashing back to her, and she groaned. Thankfully, Henry stepped up to help out with the little girl that day because she apparently crashed out on the couch in the middle of a tea party. She and Regina had yet to say two words to each other. Perhaps Regina waited for her to start the conversation. She cracked her eyes to find Alex with a toy stethoscope and other paraphernalia that a nurse might have. They slipped shut again, and she readjusted her head on the pillow.

"What's my problem, Little Wolf? Can you cure it?" Emma played along, cracking her eyes again to grin at the little girl.

Alex touched her fingers, her tiny hand wrapping around the middle knuckle. She stared at the blank, mangled spaces where her nails should have been. Sadness crossed the girl's tiny features, and Emma touched her face with the other hand. Her big blue eyes remained fixated on her fingers, though, and gingerly she touched the sensitive skin.

"Easy, Baby," Emma cautioned gently so as not to frighten the girl. Curiosity ruled her actions.

"You can't play songs," Alex said, trying to understand the injury.

"Not yet, but I think I'll make a full recovery," Emma comforted the girl with a wink. She grinned up at her, but that same fear resided in her eyes.

"Alex, are you ready for lunch?" Regina asked as she entered the living room. She wore an apron and wiped her hands on a towel, and the image caught Emma off guard. She looked like Regina, her Regina. She pulled herself into a sitting position and leaned against the arm of the sofa as Alex ran towards the foyer.

"I'll bring some soup, Emma. Let me get the children settled." Her voice rumbled pleasantly, reserved and calm, much calmer than it'd been since Katy attempted suicide. She wrung the towel and ducked her head as she turned, hair falling strikingly across her cheek.

Emma listened to her click away in the thick heels with Ruby's sensitive ears. She spoke to Henry and Katy in the dining room, asking them to keep an eye on the two younger siblings of the house, and then clicked to the kitchen before returning. She sat a bowl of broth on the coffee table with a few crackers on the plate beneath it. Her eyes, though downcast, studied Emma's pinched features.

"Do you need something else? Water or tea?" She asked, saying what she'd not intended in order to have a chance to say the things she did. Emma recognized the tactic and sighed deeply, crossing her arms over Ruby's thin ribs.

"Regina, we need to talk," Emma declared, her chest burning with memories of the previous night, the abrupt change from the night they swapped. Everything had looked so bright for them 72 hours ago. Now Emma barely tolerated the sight of the woman who had begged to be loved by her for the last two months.

"Yes, I suppose we do," Regina conceded regally. Emma scooted against the back of the couch, and Regina sat beside her thigh at an angle to face her, knees pressed together tightly. "May I begin with apologizing if I said or did anything last night which upset you? I apparently said some horrific things to Belle." Regina's shoulders and face fell with remorse, guilt, pain. What the hell had she said to Belle to cause such a dramatic reaction? She spent the past two plus years obtaining Belle's forgiveness.

"I don't even want to talk about your attraction to Ruby, which has apparently been building since you went back to fairytale land, or the fact that you practically molested her and tried to talk her into having sex with you while in my body in front of everyone at The Rabbit Hole with me sitting right beside you." Emma's words grated over her tongue harshly, and her stomach churned uncomfortably with the memory.

Regina's chest twitched like her chest clenched with the recapitulation of her actions. "I'm sorry, Emma. Truly."

"You're not in love with me," Emma dove straight into the frigid waters of their problems, brushing away the apology. It had done very little to soothe Emma's insecurity, so she went for broke, laying everything on the table at once. Regina's gaze fell to the hands clasped anxiously in her lap.

"No, I'm not," she agreed quietly, the grief too deep to express. "You're not her, no matter how much we've all tried to force you into that role."

Emma heaved a wet breath, feeling better for having the words uttered between the two of them. "I tried, Regina. I really did," Emma breathed, unable to stop the tears from blurring her vision. The sorceress took her hand, clasping it tightly in her own.

"As did I, Darling," she affirmed, allowing tears of her own to fall unhampered onto her cheeks. Emma squeezed her hand, supporting her silently. "We're not being fair to our family or to each other."

Emma shook her head, slinging tears over her face. Regina wiped them tenderly. "I do love you, Regina. I love our family. I can't imagine my life without them. I'd never leave you guys. You got me for good." She smiled sadly, knowing the truth beneath the words shone brightly in Ruby's brown eyes.

"I'd never ask that of you, especially with the children," Regina soothed the slight fear that she'd take soul custody, cut Emma out because of her inability to care for them in her current condition. This wasn't that sort of situation. "We'll find a resolution, Emma. We always have."

"I can start looking for a place when I get a job," Emma thought aloud, but Regina waved her hand dismissively.

"I'll take care of you. You needn't worry about money. This is your home, Emma, and you're welcome to stay as long as you'd like. If you wish to live elsewhere, I'll support you as long you require." What Regina hadn't said struck them both harder than what she had. If she wanted to continue living in the mansion, Regina gave her that option because they both knew that Regina couldn't replace the Emma she lost, not with this version of her wife or any other person in existence. Emma wondered if she'd ever replace Regina.

"This is really happening," Emma murmured in disbelief. They had tried so hard. After the past two months, it hardly seemed fair that they survived in one piece only to realize that it wasn't going to work.

"I can't pretend any longer, Emma. Your memories aren't going to return, and we've spent far too much energy attempting to rekindle something that simply doesn't exist anymore." Grief clawed and scraped the inside of her chest, attempting to break free. She wanted to scream, to lash out, to expel the creature of anguish growing where her heart should have been.

"What if they come back?" Emma presented the hypothetical situation hopefully, but it sputtered and died in her heart when Regina shook her head sadly.

"I cannot live my life based on what if's. My heart cannot bear the pain any longer, and our children deserve better from us. They're what's important, and we need to put them back at the top of our priorities once more, where they should have remained."

"I agree, but if they do…" Emma tried again. This woman sacrificed so much for her. She wanted Regina to be happy. She wanted to feel grounded again, a real part of this family instead of the invalid they all took care of because she couldn't remember how to do it on her own.

"If they return, we'll cope with it then," Regina answered with no real hope in her eyes. "Until then, I cannot bear to hope for more than this." She squeezed Emma's hand.

"So, this isn't necessarily an end in your eyes, just a pause for the moment to put everything back together and then try again?" Emma clarified, finding that option much more appealing than a divorce.

"I suppose, if you're agreeable to the idea," Regina placed the decision delicately into her hands, not daring to hope for or condemn their marriage.

Emma snorted, her entire head moving with the motion. Her gaze dropped to their joined hands, and she swallowed tears. "You're going to wait for her for the rest of your life, aren't you?"

"I'd cast another curse and wait an eternity if I knew she'd return to me at the end of time and break the spell," Regina declared passionately. The conviction in her quiet proclamation caught Emma's breath in her throat, and she raised her eyes to the beautiful caramel of the woman stoically fighting tears and winning. Regina believed, no matter how fervently she denied it to protect her heart.

"Regina, let's not do this," Emma changed her mind, catching the older woman off guard. "Anyone who loves that deeply, and I believe that you do, is never going to give up. It hardly seems fair if I do, at least so soon."

"You don't have to do this for me, Emma. I won't ask you to sacrifice anything else for me." Regina tried to pull away from her hand, but the other woman held firm, not allowing her hand to escape an inch.

"Yes, I do. I want what you had, Regina. Things are coming back. I remembered being a bail bondsperson. Maybe I'll remember everything else tomorrow. If you need to just be like this until our family is more stable, that's fine with me, but don't give up on me yet. So much has come back, just… not a lot about us. Isn't that strange?" Emma laughed at the irony. "I've remembered things about Ruby and Katy and snippets of Annabel and Henry. Everything is coming back but us."

"What about saying our blood oath and the memories of Salem you spoke of the other night?" Regina's brow pinched in confusion, and Emma's cheeks reddened dramatically while she scratched her forehead anxiously.

"I asked Ruby to tell me things that I could tell you to make you feel better. Regina…" Emma ground her teeth together and pushed a deep sigh through her nostrils. "I don't have a single memory of you. It's like you never existed in my mind, but my heart feels you. I know that everything you're telling me is true, the love we shared, the relationship we had. It's just gone, and I don't know why."

"You don't remember anything?" Regina demanded, her beautiful mind turning with some sort of dark thought.

"Not a damn thing," Emma confirmed. She tried to be strong instead of giving into the fear slowly eclipsing her heart, but Regina's sour expression and the rolling thunderclouds in her darkening eyes frightened her more. Had someone taken her memories with magic? She needed Amelia, but that wasn't an option until the neurosurgeon recovered from being stabbed.

"You lied to me," she scathed, eyes darkening with the betrayal of the admission.

"I never meant to lie or deceive you. I just wanted to give you hope. It made you so happy when I remembered things. I guess I was just buying time. I didn't mean to…" She stopped abruptly when Regina practically snarled at her.

"Enough, Emma. I've made my decision," Regina said firmly, holding her hand up for emphasis. "You'll be in my life, simply not as my wife or lover. I'm sorry that it ended this way, but I cannot carry on as a girl with no responsibilities anymore. I've three children who require my attention, one apparently a neurotic infant and the other suicidal, and a Council to rebuild from scratch."

"Regina." Emma reached for the other woman, but Regina stood abruptly from reach. A switch flipped inside of the sorceress, the same one that snapped the previous night when she'd taken after Ruby, and any progress they'd just made slipped away in the black hole of grief in the older woman's heart. "Regina, don't shut me out," she begged, tears already burning her eyes and throat.

"Enough," Regina whispered coldly, eyes closed against the pain. "Please, Emma. Enough."

The doorbell interrupted the desperate plea on Emma's tongue, and Regina disappeared into the foyer without further comment. Emma released the breath she'd been holding and readjusted her aching body on the sofa. How the hell had Ruby always made this look so flawless? Transforming hurt, made her joints ache, stretched muscles. Maybe if she remembered the experience, it served as a buffer to the pain, but that wasn't an option. More memory voids, more questions, not enough answers. Emma slouched into the cushions, pulling her knees to her chest and crossing her arms over her chest. She really wanted to curl into a ball and have a decent cry.

Eva entered a moment later, and Emma raised her eyes but offered nothing else as greeting. Eva sat on the coffee table, and Regina stood in the doorway. Emma raised her gaze a little further to meet her eyes, but she never moved into the room further, never made any indication that what they'd discussed two minutes ago affected her at all. The black layers of scar tissue and grief covered her Regina once more in a thick, protective balm of emptiness. It hurt Emma's heart, but the moment for emotional connection had passed for that day. Perhaps the next, Emma thought hopefully and turned her full attention to the nurse and surgeon.

"Emma, I'm just going to feel around inside you, okay? You won't feel anything, but I do like to work in silence," Eva explained, ever clinical and rational. How much pain had that woman felt to snap and attack her and Katy that day?

"Eva would you care for lasagna? I made a dish for lunch," Regina offered genially. Everyone glanced straight through the front Regina presented, but no one commented on it. Knowing the two chi-manipulating creatures before her, they already sensed their upheaval.

"I'll have some. Your lasagna is like a mouth orgasm with red pepper flakes," Lauren answered and slipped into the room with the bag Eva had carried the night she pulled them out. Eva smiled endearingly. Her girlfriend ate as much as Emma and Ruby.

Regina narrowed her eyes at the succubus, and Emma jerked in surprise. Regina liked both of the medical professionals, so why had she looked like she wanted to eat their souls for a brief moment. It ended as quickly as it came, and the witch disappeared into the foyer again, presumably to get Lauren a plate of food and check on the kids. Emma let it go. Regina ached as much as the rest of them. Her moods swings weren't unexpected or unreasonable.

"How are feeling, Emma?" Lauren asked, doing her physical exam instead of Eva. The pen light hurt her eyes, the blood pressure cuff cut into her arm, the only thing that hadn't hurt was listening to her chest and taking her pulse.

"I'm okay besides puking up raw deer and achy," she muttered, still embarrassed. How the hell had Ruby found the courage to show her face in town again after everyone remembered that she'd eaten Peter? There was a joke in there somewhere about cannibals, but Emma left it alone, something she might not have previously done.

"Achy?" Lauren asked, and Eva perked.

"Yeah, almost like I have a fever, but I guess it's just the day after the full moon. I don't know what it is. I'll have to ask Ruby when she gets back," Emma explained. She figured that the raw meat hadn't given her an infection or anything. Ruby's body was part wolf, more resilient than most.

"Emma, is it okay if I study your chi?" The succubus sought permission with all the seriousness of a physiological condition, which kept Emma's laugh inside. She nodded, and Lauren reached for her hands. Emma stared at the bandaged place where the fourth finger should have been, met Lauren's bright green eyes sheepishly, and took her hands.

Lauren hissed, and Eva squeezed her shoulder supportively. "She's so fractured, Eva," the succubus whispered. "It must be the energy required for the wolf blood."

"What the hell is going on, Eva?" Emma demanded. The cryptic talk surrounding her condition freaked her out. Lauren opened her eyes and dropped her hands, cradling her maimed left hand.

"I'm not sure, Emma," the nurse said gently. "We've never dealt with a body swap before. Your energy isn't meant to fuel Ruby's body, her soul. Your chi is fractured and scattered at the moment. You're mixed and probably confused about things at the moment, so you should probably refrain from making life-altering decisions until you're in the right body." Eva nodded, agreeing with Lauren's assessment.

They left out the fact that Emma probably slowly lost her mind as her energy focused on keeping the soul within the foreign body alive. They needed a fix and fast. Ruby's energy probably could have fueled Emma's body for years, or at least until she started tapping into Emma's magic. Who knew how much chi energy that required?

"Can I do a quick soul search?" Eva asked respectfully. They recognized the fear and apprehension in the other woman. Who wouldn't have been scared by what she'd just been told?

"I think I want Regina in here for this," Emma yearned, even as she reached for Eva's hands.

"Go ahead, Eva. I'll go get her," Lauren offered. Eva nodded, her scar moving and wriggling atop her skin as Lauren disappeared into the house.

"Eva, what are you looking for exactly?" Emma felt certain she hadn't wanted the answer, but she asked the question anyway.

"I'm confused, honestly. How many memories have you recovered since being in this body?" Emma thought seriously about the question before she answered. She'd recovered almost as much in the past two days as the past two months, except for the bits revolving around Regina. When she floundered, Eva directed her. "Do you remember being shot?"

"Yeah, I was in a coma for a while. It's kind of fuzzy, nothing specific, but I know that it happened. I know that I broke the first curse and was gone for about six months. I went nuts for a while and basically kidnapped Annabel because I had the wrong heart. I slept with Amelia." Emma ticked off new things in her mind, surprised by how much she remembered. The images slipped right in without her knowledge, and it felt good to have them, to ground herself in a sense of identity.

"What about the mine accident?" That moment defined her relationship with Regina and cemented the town's opinion of her.

"There was a mine accident?"

Eva nodded, seemingly unconcerned with her lack of recall. "What about meeting Henry," she continued, eyes closed as she delved into her subconscious, following the memories as Emma pulled them to the surface. She could have gone deeper if she wanted, but she risked damaging the precious little she'd recovered of her life in Storybrooke.

"Uhh, he found me in Boston. I brought him home. I stayed. Graham died, and I became sheriff." Emma closed her eyes reveling in the flood of pictures in her mind and feelings in her heart, even the bad ones. Eva followed her through the memories, allowing Emma's mind to be the guide.

"Nothing of Regina?" Eva asked opening her eyes. Emma shook her head, confused as hell. "Even with the little you just told me, you should have at least glimpses of her. I saw nothing, not one image aside from the ones you've created after the accident."

"Wait, why am I recovering more in Ruby's body?" Emma scratched her forehead and then crossed her arms over her stomach. It was very Emma, and looked odd on the wolf.

"Ruby's brain is not damaged, and her body is much stronger than yours. If your memories are buried in your subconscious, they should come to light a little at a time. I think your amnesia is real, Emma, but I don't think it was a completely random event. No one knows exactly how your cruiser was rigged to explode when it crossed the line. You clearly weren't meant to survive and wouldn't have if Belle and Ruby hadn't figured out how to cross the line without consequence."

"What are you saying, Eva? That I didn't die, so someone gave me a potion that made me forget Regina while I was in a coma? Why do I still feel her in my heart, then?" She presented her questions with ire at the violation instead of fear at the situation. Combating a tangible enemy scared her far less than warring with herself, her brain that no one could have healed, not even the brilliant and skilled Amelia Shepherd.

"I imagine what you feel is the blood oath you made the day of your wedding. You're connected by your souls, even if you can't remember that. Nothing that I know of can break a blood oath," Eva theorized, giving her the only possible explanation for the bizarre discovery.

"So, I got magically poisoned," she seethed.

"It's possible. Ben did work at the hospital, coming and going as he pleased," Eva mused, her brain working much faster than her mouth. "Call David. Tell him to get over to Ben's apartment and wherever Jacob was staying," she said suddenly. "I want every single paper scoured for an explanation to this."

"What are you going to do?" Emma asked, following the soul seer into the foyer.

"I have to consult the spirit world," she tossed over her shoulder cryptically. "Lauren, we need to go," she called towards the kitchen, barely shoving the medical things she'd brought into the bag, so violently were her hands trembling.

Lauren came from the kitchen in just a few seconds, her cheeks puffed out like a squirrel hoarding nuts for winter and waved before following her lover to the front door. Adrenaline coursed through Emma's system. It wasn't her, the panicked look in Eva's eye confirmed it. Someone had done this to them. Someone took them to hurt Regina, to break her. She'd become too good, too untouchable, so they attacked her family to weaken her. It sounded like psychological warfare at its finest, and Jacob was brilliant enough to pull off such a thing.

Regina shifted by the kitchen door still cracked and splintered from the energy ball that Belle had thrown at her head the day all of this started. Emma stared, chest heaving as hope and determination swelled there. She wasn't done. She'd promised to come home and intended to keep that promise. Her last chance slipped into her fingers, and she clutched at it like the lifeline that it was. It ended in bliss or disaster. Either way, they both deserved to exhaust every option to save this connection they felt in their souls.

Emma knew Regina felt it, too. The tangible pull to the other woman led wide, confident strides across the foyer. She was Emma Fucking Swan, and no on fucked with the woman she loved, even if the only evidence of that tugged inexplicably in her heart. One hand buried into dark, silky hair and the other slid around Regina's hips. Regina resisted as their lips crashed together, but Emma crushed her body against Ruby's, not letting her pull away. Emma broke the kiss after a few seconds to study Regina's eyes.

She felt different, more confident, sure of what she wanted for the first time since Regina revealed their relationship in the hospital. Even with Ruby's wide, chocolate eyes, Regina saw her wife within them, more so than any other moment in the past two months. Emma cocked her head to the side slightly and fitted her lips to Regina's again, softer but no less passionate. After a moment, Regina's moved against hers as her hands slid up Ruby's thin biceps until they rested on her collarbones.

Emma slipped both hands around the sides of her neck, thumbs brushing tenderly over her jawbones. Regina melted into her. When Emma took charge in such a manner, even in Ruby's body, imagining her wife wasn't difficult at all. Self-preservation urged her to resist, to run from the pain this indubitably brought when it crashed and burned again, but this was Emma. How could she have run from Emma?

The Savior broke the kiss slowly and bumped her forehead to Regina's. "You do what you need to do, Regina. Fix your Council, be with the kids. Those things are important, Regina, but so are we." She kissed her softly one more time and then spun abruptly towards the front door.

"Where are you going?" Regina asked a little breathlessly.

"I need to talk to Amelia about my brain. I'll be back in a little bit," Emma tossed over her shoulder, red cape sweeping behind her from the breeze of her stride.

Regina touched her chest, feeling Emma move beneath her skin once more, evidence of their blood bond. With a faint blush, she touched her cheek and turned towards the dining room to find the eyes of her teenagers upon her, wide and bewildered. She startled at the their previously unknown presence, brow furrowing at their dropped jaws and shocked expressions. Regina reminded herself that Emma currently paraded about in Ruby's body, but neither Henry nor Katy knew that yet.

"I suppose I should explain our current predicament," she mumbled, cheeks flushing with the thought of what it must have looked like to her children. Their unhinged jaws attested to that clearly enough, and Regina laughed because crying really wasn't an option in that moment.

For the first time in so long, maybe the first time ever, she laughed until her belly ached while her teenagers stared in confusion.


	11. Imperfect

Thank you, my lovelies, for the reviews and follows. My poor babies are so screwed up. I truly am a sadist, but I'll fix them. Haha.

Songs: Pour Some Sugar on Me by Def Leppard, Halo by Beyonce

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><p>"What the hell are you doing, Mom?" Henry exclaimed, not finding any humor in the situation.<p>

Regina wiped at her eyes, not even bothered by the fact that her son cursed at her. It seemed very low on the scale of importance at the moment. Katy took a couple steps towards her, stopped, dropped her hands to her sides. Anger made sense to her, but this hysterical laughter unnerved her far more than Regina's ire ever had. Henry blew past her and grabbed his mother by the shoulders, sobering her slightly.

"Mom, why are you kissing Aunt Ruby? What about Ma? What about Belle!" He squeaked, suddenly remembering the pregnant woman. "Mom, what about Belle's babies? If she stop believing in their True Love, she could lose them like you almost lost Annabel," Henry pontificating, throwing all of his concerns at her at once, but the last one killed the last of her laughter and grounded her in reality. Ever the budding hero, he thought of how her actions affected everyone but him. He possessed a big, stupid, beautiful heart just like his mother who went gallivanting off on her own personal memory crusade.

"Henry," she started, chuckled again and touched her flushed cheeks. "Something has happened."

"Yeah, you're cheating on Ma with Ruby," he seethed angrily and stomped towards the stairs.

"Henry, that's not true," Regina called and chased after him. "Please stop and allow me a moment to explain the situation."

He paused halfway up the stairs. Crossing his arms, he turned to glare down at her, his anger and hurt palpable. Regina set a hand on the bottom swirl of the rail and glanced at Katy, who had already begun following her with her arms also crossed. She looked more mortified than angry, and Regina squeezed her forearm when she came into reach.

"There has been an unforeseen development. Two nights ago, Annabel accidentally thrust Emma and I into a dreamscape. Eva managed to retrieve us before our minds were harmed, but upon doing so, Emma and Ruby accidentally swapped bodies. I was not kissing Ruby a moment ago. I apologize you found out in such a manner, but we had hoped to keep the entire debacle from you to protect you." Regina glanced between the two, gauging their reactions.

Henry plopped onto the stairs, knees spread wide, arms atop them. He looked torn between fear and laughter. Finally, he gave into the levity of the situation and cracked a smile. Katy, however, paled dramatically. She stepped away from Regina, horrified.

"Katyline?"

"You should have told us," Katy scathed, her voice deep and raspy with emotion. "You didn't think that one of us may have sought advice or solace with either Ruby or Emma?"

"Katy," Regina tried, but Katy stepped away from her reach once more, holding her arms more tightly around her ribs.

"We aren't too young to understand this situation, Regina. Why didn't you tell us!" Katy's hysteria swelled with each passing second. The poor girl sucked air far too quickly to be supplying her body properly with oxygen, face reddening intensely.

"Katy, calm down," Regina instructed soothingly, touching the girl's shoulders. "What's wrong?" Katy leaned against the banister and looked fit to pass out or murder someone if the wild, panicked glint in her eyes said anything about her mental state.

"Katy," Regina tried again.

"No, just stop!" Katy shoved her away aggressively. "Does anyone ever just tell the truth?" The words struck Regina cold, and the two women simply stared at each other. She was right, of course. Katy lost her innocence long ago, and their choice to harbor secrets from her could only further damage the original issue she'd developed with the four of them in the first place. The desire to take back the decision to exclude Katy from the body swapped burned hotly in Regina's chest.

"Regina!" Belle's frantic voice called to the sorceress as the front door slammed. "Regina, we have a problem. Katy, Henry, hello." She cleared her throat and touched her hair, pulling a handful through her closed hand and forcing a clenched smile on her face.

"What's happened, Bookworm?" Regina asked, not daring to reach out and touch the woman after their spat earlier that morning. She suspected Ruby advocated forgiveness or Belle desperately needed her assistance. Either way, Regina decided not to push the issue.

Ruby came into view. She walked backwards up the foyer steps, stumbled on the last one and somehow managed to catch her balance somewhere in the middle of the hardwood floor. Regina's brow pinched, and she fought the urge to laugh. Belle fidgeted anxiously and leaned close to the elder witch.

"Uhh, Emma is, umm," she whispered and then glanced at Henry and Katy nervously.

"Oh shove it," Katy berated the nervous woman and crossed her arms. The urge to bolt to the safety of her room battled the desire not to be excluded any longer. Belle jerked at the harsh words and touched a hand to her chest.

"They know, Belle. What's wrong with Ruby?" Regina deadpanned and pinched the bridge of her nose. She suffered from a near-constant migraine since the dreamscape and made a mental note to purchase more Excedrin. Belle's supply ran thin after two days of taking them every six hours as the bottle instructed.

"Just say the thing, Baby," Ruby said in Emma's voice. She sounded embarrassed, and the anticipation built. Holding out her hands towards the wall, she turned her face into her shoulder, eyes shut tightly.

"Okay," Belle exclaimed breathlessly. "Every time I say, 'pour some sugar on me,' Ruby…" she stopped as a loud crash interrupted her. Regina jumped as a ball of pink magic burst from Ruby's hands and slammed into the wall, sending drywall flying.

Henry made a sound of awe and disbelief above them and then clapped a hand over his mouth to hide his smile. Katy snorted in frustration and dropped her forehead to her hand. The war between laughing and crying shone brightly on her tired features. Belle grinned sheepishly, eyebrows climbing to the sky. Regina opened her mouth and shook her head as nothing slid over her tongue.

"Well, that is an odd phrase to trigger Emma's magic," she finally muttered. Ruby groaned and slumped to the floor cross-legged and leaned her elbows all the way to floor to prop up her head. Blonde curls bounced oddly around her face, already tangled in spite of the brushing she'd given them earlier.

"As I stated, we have a problem," Belle reiterated.

"Of course, you do," Katy sniped and pushed past her, retreating to the basement, her safe place. Apparently, she'd settled on broken frustration. Regina moved to follow her, comfort her, but Belle jumped in front of her.

"Regina, please. I'll take care of her. Ruby can't look at me or the same thing happens," Belle begged with her big blue eyes, hands hovering near Regina's shoulders to block her from chasing her daughter.

Regina nodded. Belle never condemned Katy, despite every reason she'd given her. "I'll take Ruby out back and start working control exercises. Don't allow her to push you away, she very much enjoys hugs," Regina instructed.

"Thank you," Belle gushed and grabbed Regina's face, planting a firm kiss on her cheek before flouncing towards the basement.

Regina took a deep breath and glanced up at Henry. "Want to help?" She asked. The boy's face lit up, and he nearly tripped down the stairs, a tribute to his heritage of clumsiness. "Will you move Annabel's playpen to the back deck? It's warm enough today for her to experience fresh air."

Belle smiled at the murmur of voices above her as she descended into the cooler part of the house in search of the young warrior. No one quite knew how to handle her anymore, but Belle decided to figure it out as they went. She tapped on the wall and stepped into the room confidently.

"Go away," Katy seethed.

"Katyline Katherick Swan, sit down and shut up," Belle ordered, hands clasped calmly in front of her hips. Katy fumed, and her hands pulled into white-knuckled fists at her thighs. Belle raised an eyebrow at the defensive aggression but made no other acknowledgement that she'd even noticed the fury rolling from the young woman. After a minute and the realization that Belle was neither scared nor intimidated, Katy slumped onto her bed, scooting backwards until her back touched the wall.

"What?" She demanded, crossed her arms over her stomach, and pulled her knees towards her chest.

"I love you," she declared unexpectedly. "After Captain's death, I was the first person you spoke those words to, do you remember?" Katy nodded and bowed her head at the same time. She clutched at the little wooden pendant around her neck and breathed deeply, controlling her emotions.

Belle threw her hands in the air and paced across the small room. "I'm so angry with you, Katy. What you did was reckless and stupid. The betrayal hurts far worse than the pain from our attacks." She twirled in a graceful rage and paced the opposite direction. "People almost died, Katy. I myself was beaten unconscious and forced to flee Storybrooke because I feared for the life of my children." She covered her stomach with both hands and changed directions again.

"Everything that happened made us question each other, question our relationships, our love, our own bloody sanity. So, yes, we are having problems right now as much as you are. The difference between us and you at the moment is the fact that we are up there, facing our problems and fears and pain together," she jerked her finger towards the ceiling as she stopped in the center of the room and fixed the young woman with a white-hot glare. "We're not hiding in the basement feeling sorry for ourselves."

She held up a hand when Katy opened her mouth to speak. "Ah! I'm talking," Belle shut her down quickly and waited for her to slump back against the wall in a pout.

"I didn't run away because I was afraid that I'd be persecuted for my actions at Breck. I left because something else was more important than the contrition and punishment I've craved for over thirty years. I had a chance for a proper atonement, finally, and I missed it because my children came before the cleansing of my own soul.

"Everything we have done since the curse broke was to protect the people of this town and each other and our children. You're angry at us, fine, just fucking say it. Tell us how angry you are. Tell us how much you blame us for Captain's death. Tell us how you wanted us to suffer." Belle stepped back when Katy flew off the bed and betrayed every instinct that bade her defend herself against the aggressive maneuver, but the girl only took an extra step forward and grabbed her shoulders.

"I fucking hated all of you!" She screamed in Belle's face. "You had your perfect fucking family, and your perfect fucking relationships. You invited me into that, but it never felt real. I had no one, and the fucking Heroines of Storybrooke took me under their wings because that's who they are. It wasn't about me! Do you even know how that felt? How pathetic it made me feel, that I'd been adopted out of pity?"

"Yes, I do," Belle came back heatedly and broke the painful grip on her shoulders with a twist of her elbows. "I felt the same way after being released from the asylum in which Regina held me prisoner for 28 years. I thought the same thing for months, and then I believed they tolerated my presence because of Ruby's love for me. And, why shouldn't I have believed that? I was virtually useless, a child who didn't know better than to stick a fork in a bread crisper while it was red hot, who didn't know how to eat pancakes properly, drive a car, use a blow dryer or even a shower. I was a liability to them." She paused to allow the words to sink into the girl's grief-addled brain.

"I was wrong, Katy, and so are you," Belle drove home her point, and Katy staggered backwards. The backs of her knees hit the bed, and she tumbled to the safety of the soft landing, falling forward to drop her face into her scarred and callused hands.

"I messed everything up, Belle. I didn't realize how much I needed them until it was too late. I know I was wrong about them, but I'm not you, I screwed everything up," Katy lamented and then fell silent when her shoulders shook too hard with tears to speak more.

Belle breathed a sigh of relief as she sat beside the broken young woman and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "It's never too late as long as you have the will to fight for what you want. Regina and I are living proof that even the most heinous transgressions can be accepted if not immediately forgiven."

Katy sobbed harshly and collapsed into the librarian's lap, wrapping her arms around her waist as she pressed her face into Belle's belly. Belle immediately tossed an arm over her waist and leaned over to press her lips against Katy's frizzy, dirty blonde hair. Calm settled over the reserved former princess. She knew pain, how to handle it, how to detect it, how to grieve.

"Katy, has anyone spoken to you about the child you lost?" She asked tenderly, the words barely a whisper into the girl's ear. She shook her head without removing her face from Belle's stomach. "Would you like to?"

Katy shook her head again, lifting her face to meet Belle's watery blue eyes. "Not yet. I don't even know how to begin processing that. I knew for a few weeks before the miscarriage. It was… she's better off this way."

"You were having a daughter?" Belle asked, her compassionate voice catching in her throat. Her chest clenched with the remembrance of her own lost child. She'd never asked the sex, never wanted to know. Somehow, that made it more difficult to process after the fact.

"The hospital keeps a lot of it's old equipment in the basement. I used the old ultrasound that runs over your belly and then did a lot of research to find out what everything was," Katy explained, and Belle smiled. "I was going to name her after my mother, Kaylin."

"That's a beautiful name. If one of these pups is a girl, Ruby and I are going to name her after Granny and my mother," Belle shared, connecting with the girl. "Elizabeth Brunetta Lucas."

"Brunetta?" She wrinkled her nose, and Belle smiled as Katy sat up and wiped at her eyes.

"Yes," she laughed. "My mother thought it sounded pompous, which is why Bethany and I have such simple names," the librarian explained with a hint of sadness in her eyes.

"Do you miss her?" Katy's old eyes clutched at Belle's heart, and the young witch nodded.

"Every day. I blamed Bethany for her death for the longest time. It wasn't fair to her, and I think if I'd just accepted her death for what it was, an accident, an unexpected and horrible random event, I might have saved Bethany a decade of suffering." She wiped her tears bravely and dared to smile at the young woman staring at her with wonder in her eyes. Her guilt for Bethany's childhood only intensified when she confided the mutilation to her body, but she hadn't the time to process that just yet, especially when Katy looked at her like she'd finally found something firm and tangible to cling to.

"We all feel irrational guilt and anger and place blame where it does not belong, Katy. Don't look so shocked," she gently berated the teen, and Katy averted her gaze to the hands clasped painfully in her lap.

"Do you think she'll ever forgive you?" Katy asked, genuinely seeking guidance. She felt so lost in the sea of guilt and pain and anger that she wondered if she'd ever find a beacon of hope to guide her path.

"She already has," Belle murmured and covered Katy's hands with a trembling one of her own. Surprisingly, the girl turned one of hers over and pressed Belle's palm between hers. "I've found that forgiving myself is much more difficult."

"I can't disagree with that." She laughed self-deprecatingly and returned her red-rimmed, hazel eyes to Belle's equally puffy baby blues. "This really is the family to be in when you've fucked up beyond repair and need other fucked up people in your life just to make you feel sane, isn't it?"

Belle laughed, a genuine and mournfully joyous sound, and nodded. "I think you're in good company, Sweetheart."

"We should have t-shirts or refrigerator magnets made or something. 'Fucked up? Welcome to the Swan-Lucas clan,'" she quoted their family motto and waved her hand in the air in an arc. Belle chuckled and wrapped Katy in a hug, and her niece returned it without a fuss

"Thank you," she murmured against Belle's aching breast. The librarian craned her neck, meeting her eyes in confusion, and Katy shrugged. "For telling me how angry and upset you are with me. It makes it easier to accept the things that I did. Everyone is so focused on what happened to me that I don't even feel like a human being anymore. I'm just a pitiable victim of a psychopathic predator, and I'm not denying that I was, but I also made most of those decisions of my own free will."

Belle dropped a kiss to her forehead. "You'll make it up to us, Katy, but we also have to give you that chance. You're young, but you're not a child who didn't know right from wrong. You were vulnerable, and someone took advantage of that, but we're still allowed to be angry with you as much as you reserve the right to be angry with us for not being there for you. We'll find a way to the other side together," Belle promised and slid a hand over the girl's poofy hair.

"I don't know if I'm strong enough to face everything," Katy admitted. "Everyone looks at me like this invincible person because I'm tough and unemotional."

"You mean the way every single person in this town views their four heroines." The last two words slid over her tongue with such contempt that Katy actually stiffened against her. Point made, Belle continued, "We'll help you through that if you open up and let us. I can't promise we'll never be angry at you or confront things that will hurt everyone involved, but between the four of us, we've done so many harmful things to each other that we're practically experts on the subject."

Katy appreciated the levity in the statement and sat up to study the older woman. "Is Ruby going to take Alex from me?"

Belle shook her head. "Absolutely not. We're a family, and you two are made for each other."

Katy laughed and pulled her hair from its elastic band to straighten it after their crying match. "She grew on me eventually," she joked as she pulled her hair into a loose pony tale at the nape of her neck.

"So? You quoting Def Leppard turns Ruby on?" She teased.

Belle rolled her eyes. "I'd never heard the song before today when it played on the speaker at the grocery store. It was catchy. I sang the lyrics, and the next moment, frozen chicken is skittering across the floor half-cooked," Belle recounted animatedly, finding more humor than she should have in Ruby's predicament. Katy laughed outright, imagining the entire scene.

An explosion vibrated above them, followed by the sound of Ruby yelling about something. Two mouths tugged upwards in a small smile. "Never a dull moment," Belle muttered and smiled at the teen. "Care to go laugh at my fiancée with me?"

"You're sure they want me there?" The reticent warrior sought reassurance like a child.

Belle smoothed a hand over her hair once more and held the back of her head in a motherly caress. "No, I can't make that promise, but I want you there and I can promise not to leave you to fight alone as long as you're willing to fight."

Katy nodded shyly and followed Belle from the room. As they approached the door in the kitchen that led to the patio, Katy reached down and snagged Belle's hand in a sweaty death grip. Belle returned the tight pressure and nodded encouragingly. She wasn't alone, all of them were imperfect and never pretended to be anything else, and she never had to be unless she decided to live that way.


	12. Normal

Enjoy, my pretties!

Songs: Here's to Us by Halestorm, Hello by Kelly Clarkson

* * *

><p>"Hey," Emma said gruffly as Ruby might have. Amelia glanced towards the door apprehensively, and Caleb offered a boyish smile beneath his light scruff of a beard. He really was a handsome man. She stepped into the room, hands shoved into the denim falling from Ruby's hips, pushing them further over the jutting pelvic bones.<p>

"Hi Ruby," Caleb greeted. Surely Amelia had informed them of her rocky relationship with the wolf, but he made every effort on behalf of his girlfriend to welcome her.

"Hey Caleb, mind if I have a minute with my girl Friday?" Her chin jabbed towards Amelia who seemed slightly dazed.

"Sure, but you should know that I finally talked her into taking some weak painkillers, so she's been in and out of it a bit. Right, baby?" He included her in the discussion as he stood pressed a kiss to the side of her head. It was sweet, and something she might have done for Regina. She loathed being spoken for, they all did, even by their lovers.

"I'll be gentle," Emma promised and winked at Amelia suggestively. The neurosurgeon stiffened uncomfortably. "Although, it's my understanding that doesn't really do it for you," she continued when Caleb shut the door behind him.

"Ruby, if you're here to attack me again, I really don't think it's necessary. Jacob took care of it for you," Amelia snapped, her voice lazy beneath the influence of the medication. She really shouldn't have had it, but after the last few months, no one retained the strength to fight anything the hard way. She'd be okay with Caleb at her side, Emma decided.

"On the contrary," she began and trailed her fingers up Amelia's leg, starting at her knee and moving up her thigh. "I came to pick that beautiful brain of yours," she explained as she leaned over, holding her weight on the flat of her arm above Amelia's head. Two inches separated their faces, and Amelia swallowed nervously while Emma laughed internally at the potions master.

"Ruby, I… what do you want to know?" She queried. Her hand edged towards the call button, and Emma snatched it up quickly. They shared another heated gaze before Emma lowered her lips to the pale arm, ensuring she kissed every dexterous knuckle.

"Ruby, what the hell are you doing?" Amelia demanded, more than a little unnerved, even in her drugged state.

"Is it true that you intend to continue sleeping with women even if you and Caleb work out?" She dropped her voice to a husky rumble, and Amelia squirmed uncomfortably. She'd confided that to Emma a few weeks prior, but Ruby's ears heard mouse squeaks through three inch steel.

"I… I suppose. We haven't really discussed it yet, with the mass murderer running loose and all," she answered with a shaking voice and pulled gently at her hand still in the wolf's grasp. Emma released the limb and cupped her face. "W-why do you ask, Ruby? Ruby, girlfriend of Belle French, and self-proclaimed enemy of me."

Emma grinned wickedly and brushed her cheek against Amelia's, hearing her heartbeat increase… in fear or arousal, she'd never know. "I think I'd like to see what the fuss is about," she whispered and then ran the flat of her tongue from jaw to temple, leaving a generous spit trail behind.

"Oh gross!" Amelia swatted her up side the head and wiped at her cheek. "What the hell is wrong with you? I mean, don't get me wrong, Ruby, you're fucking hot and I can only imagine the positions we could get into with your supernatural strength, not to mention… never mind. What the hell is wrong with you?" She eventually made it back to her original point, and Emma laughed, a deep and sensual sound that vibrated her chest.

"I really want to know what you imagine my wolf strength capable of," Emma continued, barely keeping the laughter out of her voice as she trailed her knuckles down Amelia's thigh. She barely maintained the charade when her friend's cheeks flushed almost instantly, and Amelia dropped her dark, brown eyes.

"That good, huh?" Emma prodded. "Tell me, Amelia. What would you like me to do to you?"

Amelia's mouth fell open, moving up and down every couple of seconds, but no sound exited the gaping hole. Emma helped her out, "Strap on?" Amelia's mouth clicked shut. "Ohhh, I know. You'd like to tie me up and whip me until hot, slick juice runs down my thighs, and I beg you to hit me just a little bit harder."

A ragged breath deflated Amelia's chest, and she immediately averted her eyes to the floor and chewed her lower lip voraciously. Emma burst into laughter, falling forward onto her crossed arms by her friend's thigh. Amelia glared at Ruby's strangely affectionate and lascivious attentions once more. "Ruby, have you started drinking again?"

After a minute, Emma raised her head and propped her hand on a hand, still standing with her butt slightly in the air. "So, Regina and I got sucked into a dreamscape and Eva brought us out of it, but there were some complications. For starters, Ruby and I switched bodies. There's a whole new werewolf in town, baby," she announced and winked at the flabbergasted surgeon.

"Emma?" She exclaimed in a high pitched voice that made the woman attached to it grab her sensitive ears.

"You got it," Emma muttered, sticking a finger into her ear to wiggle the ringing drum inside. It only worsened when Amelia smacked her up side the head again, much harder this time.

"Damn you, you fucking dildo-hopping floozy. I seriously thought Ruby was coming onto me," Amelia bellowed, more focused on that fact that Emma jerked her around instead of the fact that she currently housed in the wrong body.

"Awww come on, my little cum-sloppin' whore. That was funny, admit it," Emma shot straight back and wrinkled her nose at the visual of the insult she'd thrown down.

"Wait…" Finally, Amelia strung the pieces together. "Wait, what?" She closed her eyes and slapped a hand over her face, fingers pressing into her eye.

"For a genius neurosurgeon, you're awfully inarticulate," Emma smeared more insult into the other woman's face and waited impatiently for her friend to tape everything together once more.

"I was gutted like a fish three days ago and am slightly high on morphine, give me a damn break, Savior. Wait, so you're in Ruby's body, and she's in yours?" Emma nodded. "Which is why you were acting so weird when she and Belle stopped by earlier." Emma nodded again.

"Look, I know this is something huge to digest, but I need you to save that for later and help me out with something," Emma dove into the no-nonsense aspect of this visit.

"If I can," Amelia answered automatically. Far more horrible things had happened than swapping bodies for their fucked up group. It wasn't a stretch to push it to the side for the moment with all the other tokens of weird and messed up they all avoided.

"Okay, so, pretty much all of my memories have come back in this body. Eva said it might have something to do with Ruby's brain not being damaged, so all the synapses are firing properly and such. The only person that hasn't come back is Regina, Eva said that there wasn't a single memory that she could see of Regina before the accident."

"Zambcurk root?" Amelia blurted.

"Gesundheit," Emma followed the ejaculation, but any levity the word previously held dropped away in the vat of the boiling oil this situation suddenly became.

"Zambcurk root," Amelia repeated. "Combined with the blood of a person, it can cause irreversible memory loss of that person. It's the only explanation I've got."

"Seriously? There's something out there like that?" Righteous anger scorched Emma's chest. She bowed her head towards the bed and sucked deep, slow breaths.

"It's a pretty fucking complex potion, Emma. Someone would have to be close to my skill to get it right. It's the one I was mixing when my lab exploded and put Regina into a Fearscape," she explained.

"Wait, back up." Dread filled Emma's heart, and she raised her eyes to Amelia's. "It's irreversible?"

Amelia shrugged a shoulder and slapped a hand over Emma's. "If anyone else were asking me that question, I'd tell them yes, but you and Regina sort of defy the impossible, so the moment I am back on my feet, Caleb and I are going to try to create a reversal potion. It would help if I had my book, if Jacob and Ben really took it." Even though she'd written most of it down and began recreating the spell book, all of her notes and corrections were irreplaceable and she felt naked and exposed without them.

"Eva and Lauren are looking through their apartment right now, I'll send them a text." Emma pulled out Ruby's phone and tapped at the screen with her good fingers, keeping the other two far from the danger zone of temptation and habit.

"Between a soul seer, three witches, and a succubus and the best potion mixer known to the realm, one of us should be able to come up with something," Amelia thought aloud, her mind already turning with possibilities. "Maybe if I made a memory enhancement potion and Eva poked at the walls around those particular memories. I don't know much about seers, not many people do who aren't seers, but I can't imagine that's terribly safe."

Emma sent the text with an angry jab and looked up at her injured friend. "I don't care if it's safe. I want her back. We're bonded, remember? I can't feel that for the rest of my life and not remember why. We almost ended our marriage not even an hour ago, Amelia. I can't lose her, and I'm not sure how much more Regina can stand. She's…" Emma huffed against the maelstrom of emotional and conflicting thoughts inside her mind.

"On the edge of a nervous breakdown?" Amelia supplied. Emma nodded sadly, one cheek pinching and forehead scrunching forward. Emma had sported the expression many times, but it looked so very odd on Ruby's features that Amelia almost laughed.

"Emma, go home, be with your wife," Amelia whispered tenderly. She loved the damn fool savior and her former mistress more than she cared to admit, even to herself. They'd given her a purpose again, made her a part of something, a family.

"You're right. Regina needs me to be strong right now, and fuck all if I'm not going to give that woman what she needs," Emma vowed passionately. Amelia chuckled and immediately grabbed her stomach. Emma snickered. "Serves ya right for laughing at me."

"Fuck off, Savior."

Emma grinned and leaned forward to kiss Amelia's cheek. "I love you, Miss Kitty. Do you need anything while I'm here? Can I bring you anything?"

Amelia squeezed her hand and grinned bashfully, the expression suited her girlish features, and Emma took a moment to appreciate her beauty, her brokenness. "I have everything I need, Marshall. Caleb hasn't really gone home yet. Granny sat with me a while yesterday so he could go take a shower and get some sleep."

"Granny? Really?"

Amelia offered a cheeky grin. "Don't worry, I got an earful about sleeping with you, and in the next breath she thanked me for always being there. Y'know, not those exact words because Granny would never say anything so sentimental, but…"

Emma chuckled and nodded. "Gotcha."

"Go," Amelia shooed her. "I'm assuming the reason you're not the talk of the town right now is because you're keeping your little swap quiet, so I'll keep my trap shut." Emma squeezed her hand again and turned towards the door.

She whipped about suddenly with a devious grin. "I'm like a super hero," she whispered conspiratorially and jerked the strings of the cloak about her neck loose. "Check me out." She crouched slightly and propelled from the floor, tipping her fingers off the soft tiles on the ceiling. She landed lightly with a small flourish of her arms and took a bow. "Right?" She shook her head, nudging Amelia to agree with her.

"Very superhero-ish," Amelia agreed sardonically and rolled her eyes. The smile touching her lips, however, brightened Emma's soul. She always felt better around Amelia. What they'd shared when she carried Regina's heart helped save her soul, and no matter how often people condemned the surgeon for her behavior, Emma never listened, never allowed that seed to be planted. No one had to understand their bond as long as they kept their damn mouths shut.

"Okay, seriously, I love you. Go home," Amelia ordered, pointing towards the door emphatically with no room for argument within the gesture. Emma donned the cape once more and swept it over her face as she turned towards the door. Amelia closed her eyes, grimacing and smiling at the same time, at the resounding thump of Emma hitting the door.

"Not a fucking word," Emma threatened as she held her forehead with one hand and opened the door with the other.

She passed Caleb coming back towards the room with a cup of coffee and a pre-packaged sandwich. Emma wrinkled her nose at the thought of what sort of processed mumbo jumbo he'd be putting into his system with that crap and slapped a hand to his chest. His eyes grew, but he remained silent and unmoved, otherwise. Good, he had a backbone and wasn't afraid to stand tall, even under the scrutiny of one of them.

"Come over for dinner tonight. You've been eating crap for days now. Just come get a plate if you want and bring it back here, okay? Like six-ish?" Emma stalked off without further comment and Caleb shook his head at the moody wolf.

By the time she arrived back at the mansion, she'd made more stops than she cared to admit, bought more things than she should have, and wondered exactly what Regina would think of her new project. She hefted the box over her shoulder again. The supernatural strength she suddenly possessed was to be thanked for the fact that she carried it at all, but she felt exposed with the cape nestled in the grocery bags she toted in the other hand. Instead of going inside the mansion, she skirted around the house to begin her new endeavor in the safety of the backyard.

"Wolf!" Alex yelled when she rounded the corner, and Emma jerked, nearly dropping the box off her shoulder. The girl sat on the banister with Katy's arms wrapped around her protectively to keep her from falling in her excitement. Belle stood beside the two of them with a mug of tea between her hands on the rail, probably got sick again. Regina, Ruby, and Henry stood in the middle of the yard.

"Wolf, Temma's doing magic," Alex explained, and Emma snorted.

"I'm sure she is," Emma poked fun at the clearly miserable wolf and hefted the box again.

"Uhh, what's that?" Ruby asked curiously, excitement growing in the voice and features of Emma's body.

Emma grinned mischievously and ascended the three steps to the back deck and deposited her load. She stepped back to admire her purchases. "I bought a grill," she said matter-of-factly as Ruby practically hip bumped her out of the way. She grinned, a child at the circus. "We're have baby back ribs for dinner."

"Cool! Can I help?" Henry squeaked, his changing voice raking everyone's eardrums. He tripped up the stairs, barely catching himself before he barreled into the two women, and vibrated in place.

Emma tossed an arm around his shoulder. "You got it, Kid." She winced and glanced around helplessly at the other adults, but no one seemed concerned as Belle rifled through the grocery bags, picking out things that needed refrigerated, namely the massive amount of ribs she'd brought home.

"Thanks, Ma," he yelled over his shoulder and ran for the house, presumably to get tools to assemble the grill. Katy followed with Alex on her shoulders, especially since Henry insisted on calling Emma and Ruby by the names of their minds and not their bodies. Emma produced a skirling sound and pointed towards the teenagers.

"Oh yeah, they totally caught their Aunt Ruby with her tongue down mommy's throat when you took off a couple hours ago," Ruby explained crudely, and Emma rolled her eyes.

"Miss Lucas," Regina reprimanded the wolf and squeezed the bridge of her nose.

"Are you okay, Regina?" Belle asked. Ruby turned her back abruptly as the librarian stepped into sight, and Emma might have laughed if concern for Regina hadn't filled her mind.

"Of course," Regina murmured and waved off Belle's assistance when she reached out to steady her. "I believe this may be a lingering side effect of the unguided dreamscape, given the images we witness, I'm not surprised." After the fiasco with Amelia's lab exploding, she suffered headaches and nose bleeds for nearly a month before fully recovery.

"You should lay down for a bit, Regina. I'm not terribly knowledgeable of the spirit world, but I've heard this is a common consequence of inexperienced users, such as Annabel," Belle babbled, focusing on the facts rather than the fear or worry. She left those particular responses to the two idiots behind her.

"I believe I will," Regina agreed far too easily for anyone's comfort. "Emma can continue the control exercises while they play with that infernal contraption." She pointed to the boxed grill. "Had I desired to cook over a fire, I'd have left us in The Enchanted Forest," she grumbled as Belle placed a hand between her shoulder blades and lead her towards the kitchen.

Emma leaned over to the playpen set up on the patio and lifted her daughter into her arms. "Hey there, Squidgelette," she murmured and rocked back and forth with the tiny creature, adjusting her little hat so the warm afternoon June sun didn't burn her face. Ruby studied the woman in her body, the relaxed shoulders, the calm strength that vibrated off of her instead of the disconnected energy of her younger self she'd felt for the past two months, the contentedness of feeling her daughter in her arms.

Emma squinted at the odd expression on Ruby's face, but the wolf only pulled her into a hug, including Annabel. "Welcome back," she murmured, and Emma pressed her forehead to Ruby's temple, eyes squeezing shut tightly under the meaning of that statement. She felt more like herself than she had in a while, not quite lost and confused, not completely whole but not utterly fragmented anymore.

"Got the tools!" Henry announced, and the two women separated.

Annabel laid her head sleepily against Emma's chest, and The Savior smiled down at the infant. "I'm going to take her up to Regina for a nap," she announced as Katy returned to the porch with Alex still perched atop her like a parrot clinging to her forehead for balance.

Emma took a moment to study the group from the voyeuristic advantage of the kitchen. She sensed Belle, smelled her, before she felt the soft, warm hand on the small of her back. She froze momentarily as the wolf clawed beneath her skin, stalking and pacing to find a way past her fledgling defenses.

"You're not going to hurt me, Emma," she stated confidently and then blinked up at her prettily. "Don't look so shocked. It's unbecoming on one as intelligent as you," she berated immediately afterwards.

"Who talked Katy into staying upstairs for longer than a meal?" She asked, observing the stunted and clipped conversation between her other daughter and the woman outside the door. Ruby fought valiantly to behave civilly towards the girl that nearly brought them all to their knees, and Katy reticently spoke to the wolf as they pulled out the pieces of the cooking apparatus.

"It wasn't difficult. I only treated her as a person and not a victim," Belle explained. From anyone else, the words probably sounded pompous and self-righteous, but Belle's modest tone and logical if vague presentation of what occurred after she left endeared the reserved woman to anyone lucky enough to be in her presence.

"Shall I take Annabel? I'd very much like a nap of my own, and this prevents disturbing Regina. The books I read told me that I'd be very exhausted, but I never imagined they'd be so accurate," she babbled and touched her belly with both hands, leaning over her breasts to see her stomach.

"I remember, and yeah, that'd be great. Thanks, Belle." Emma handed her drowsy infant to the librarian, kissed them both on the cheek, and resumed studying the four people on the porch.

Belle stayed for a moment, jostling Annabel gently. "It feels so normal, doesn't it?" Emma nodded and crossed her arms over her chest.

Normal. After everything they'd gone through, their lives would never be normal. They were never going to be normal anyway, not given the extraordinary circumstances that brought them all together, but for a brief, perfect moment, they seemed alright. They felt normal, and it felt wonderful.


	13. Vacillation

Dear Guest: I'm scratching my head with your Amelia conspiracy. When she and Emma had sex, Emma had recovered her memories by that point and knew exactly who she was and what she was doing. She did it because she carried Regina's heart, which then led to the discovery of the switch because was this huge OOC thing. As for the potion with Zambcurk, the reference is to the one that Amelia mixed in The Enchanted Forest at the behest of The Evil Queen that went awry. Therefore, no conspiracy with Amelia. She's not backhanded or looking to hurt people intentionally, just a fucked up person who does things without completely thinking them thru first. And, she's not really going away anytime soon, Emma needs a buddy.

Other guest who keeps suggesting a foursome: are you the same person who has been on this since Without the Darkness? If so, I really like your ideas. *devious grin* It'd never happen in the reality of my story… but perhaps a one-shot. The more I think of it, the more I want to try it.

Also, just read the reviews from The Long Game over… Holy crap, it never occurred to me that the things with Granddaddy started that long ago. Seems so surreal. Thanks again for your support. He's doing wonderfully in his recovery. He's definitely my "Granny" and I don't know what I'd do without him.

Okay, enough babbling. Enjoy!

Song: Something to be Proud of by Montgomery Gentry

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><p>Annabel choked a little as she woke. She blinked once and then produced a strangled cry that made Belle jerk as she woke suddenly. Big green eyes opened and stared into the bleary blue attached to the adult-sized human next to her for a few seconds before she loosed another wail. Belle smiled despite the horrid sound filling her room and rubbed at her eyes as she sat up.<p>

"I'm awake, beautiful girl," she murmured without looking back at the infant. She pressed on the sides of her breasts, holding the weight slightly off her chest, and groaned in relief. Ruby would definitely not be touching them anytime soon. Annabel strangled another cry, and the librarian lowered her breasts gently and leaned over to slip back into her heels before picking up the tiny creature. The wrinkled gray and pink plaid skirt and shirt in which she'd fallen asleep in never even crossed her mind, much less bothered her.

"You feel hot, Baby," she whispered to the child as if she might have understood and pressed her cheek to her forehead. Annabel answered by shoving a fist into her mouth. "Are you teething?" She pondered, digging into her literature knowledge of babies to help her diagnose the issue. "Is that the problem?" She cooed and pulled the fist away from the girl's mouth, replacing it with a single finger. Two little bumps, both on her lower gums told her that that was in fact the case. The infant clamped onto her finger, and Belle winced and smiled at the same time. "I'll take that to mean yes."

Compassion and helplessness flooded her heart, and she sniffled back the resulting tears. "I wish I could take that pain from you, my darling," she cried quietly, feeling utterly ridiculous but a slave to the hormones flooding her body anyway. Nestling the babe against her aching breasts, she soothed her while ignoring her own pain and discomfort of the extra weight on her sensitive mounds.

"Let's see if we can find something cold for you to bite on, hmm?" Belle continued talking to the girl through her wet and slightly burning face. By the time she reached the foyer, Annabel settled slightly, still chomping on Belle's finger for relief. She fussed when Belle retracted the finger and opened the fridge to find the teething rings she'd seen in there. Annabel wasted no time holding the toy to her mouth the moment it touched her lips.

"Better, Darling?" She brushed fingers through thick black hair, Regina's hair, just like they'd wanted. Regina's hair, Emma's eyes, and a rash and spontaneous attitude. It was a little too eugenic-esque for her tastes of how her own children would look and behave. As long as they were happy, she decided, any birth defect or medical issue would never matter.

"What is that? A defect?" she asked the tiny human looking up at her contentedly now that the cool plastic soothed her aching gums. "Hmmm? What is that Annabel? A label _experts_ have slapped on anything they perceive as less than perfect? Is that what it is?" She grinned at the voracious suckling and shook her head at herself. She spoke to the baby as if she understood, held the answers. As Belle studied those bright green eyes studying her, she realized that Annabel had indeed held the answers she needed. Ruby was right: she deserved to be a mother despite her guilt. That realization failed to lessen the pain, but it gave her hope.

A crash and yell interrupted the moment, and she closed her eyes, smiling widely at the totally predictable rowdiness of the rest of her family. With a sigh, she joined them on the patio. Techno music and a foreign language immediately met her ears and the sight that followed made her laugh out loud. Emma, Ruby, Katy, Henry, and Alex attempted the dance from the Gangnam Style video… unsuccessfully.

"You're horrible," she blurted, scaring them all. Alex looked up at her like a wounded puppy, and Belle knelt to the girl's level carefully with the infant in her arms. "Except for Alex. She definitely takes after me on the dance floor," she added for the girl's sake, even if she had more closely resembled a wriggling worm than a fluid dance step.

The moment she stood, she handed Emma her daughter and kissed the girl's head. "Your daughter has begun teething," she informed her fellow mother as she hit the replay button on the Ipod nestled into a speaker deck in the middle of the table.

"The night I arrived in Portland, I met this very nice man dressed as a woman on the street. He apparently used to be a dancer, and we spent the evening deciphering this particular dance," she explained as she waited for the chorus to begin.

Four jaws dropped when prim and proper Belle simulated riding a horse, bouncing perfectly with the beat. Alex, of course, shrieked in delight and clapped her hands, cheering her mother onward. She jabbed a hand to her hip, the other spinning in the air like a lasso, and bounced from heel to heel to complete the second part of the dance. She laughed and rolled her head from side to side, continuing with the dance she'd choreographed with Marty, or Midnight Desire, depending on how he was dressed. When the chorus repeated, she fell straight back into the signature dance moves of the song.

"Dude, Rubes, your girlfriend is…" The wolf in Emma's body scratched towards the surface, and she barely clamped down on the words before they spilled over her tongue.

"Uh huh," Henry agreed. Both Ruby and Emma tipped the boy on the back of the head lightly. He'd always harbored a boyish crush on Belle. His ears turned red instantly, and he lowered his head sheepishly, embarrassed.

Ruby destroyed the spell she'd cast on them when she whipped towards the yard without warning and loosed a ball of magic into the trees, narrowly missing Regina's apple tree. Belle felt her face flush from the unexpected event, knowing exactly what it meant, and it spark a certain confidence and warmth in her chest. It wasn't arrogance or sexual arousal specifically, but the fact that 30 seconds of dancing caused such a dramatic reaction in her fiancée made her tingle and glow with that indescribable feeling of being desired, as a woman, as a mother, despite her mistakes.

Alex squealed with laughter and clapped her hands. "Magic!" She yelled and rushed towards Belle, wrapping her arms around her knees. Belle grinned down at the girl and touched the back of her head. She swore she'd grown a full foot since she'd been gone, though she knew it to be an impossible thought.

"Alex, want to help me in the kitchen?" Katy stepped in to save the other women from the awkward task of explaining why Emma couldn't control her magic to the toddler. Belle nodded her thanks when Alex's young brain immediately glommed onto the idea.

"Piggy, Kay!" She demanded, arms stretched towards the teenager, and Katy crouched low enough for the girl to wrap arms around her neck.

"Henry, please take your sister," Emma said. The boy held out his arms and accepted the infant into them, holding the teething ring.

Belle touched Emma's shoulder. "Actually, I think Ruby would benefit from honing her control with the person who destroys it." Ruby learned absolute control of her wolf, she'd seen it the day they made love in the library upon her return. After two months of separation, they made passionate love without the wolf appearing once. Ruby even cried and got angry, but that revealed the woman beneath the façade, not the wolf. If she controlled something that powerful, Emma's fledgling magic barely offered an obstacle once she overcame the shock of feeling it.

Emma nodded. "Okay, but we've only got another two hours on the ribs," she said and jerked a thumb towards her shiny new toy. "Don't let her blow up my grill."

"Your cooking monstrosity shall be safe," Belle promised, her focus on the back of the woman bent over the rail holding her hands over her ears.

She stepped forward and placed a soothing hand between Ruby's shoulder blades. Ruby's palms glowed pink, and she held them straight out in front of her, pointing them towards the ground. Belle touched her hip and hooked her chin over a shoulder, intentionally riling her lover.

"Ruby, just breathe and think of something else," she instructed. "Think about your new menu at the diner. Do you have all of the necessary supplies to serve it for a week?" The pink dulled slightly, and a deep breath deflated the poor woman's lungs.

"I change my mind. I'd much rather have my wolf than magic," Ruby confided. "How the hell do you control this shit?" Ruby adamantly insisted for years that magic wielders lived life much more easily than her because of her wolf. She was wrong. Magic sucked when you couldn't control it. Poor Emma must live in a constant fear of losing control like she had for so many years before she learned how to control the darker half of herself.

"Practice and perseverance," Belle murmured and slid her hand along the toned stomach of Emma's body, teasing the woman who occupied it. "Patience, a virtue of which you have very little." The glow increased with the added stimulation, but Ruby obviously focused her thoughts elsewhere because it receded to a faint glow in her palms a few seconds later.

"Belle, what if I hurt someone?" Ruby shared her fears, and Belle kissed her shoulder supportively, not necessarily to rile her more.

"You won't, Sweetheart. I have absolute faith in you," she praised quietly, and all three women knew the words to be true. Thank the gods for Belle French. She seemed to be the unbreakable string knitting them all back together. Of course she was. Belle's heart possessed the largest capacity for forgiveness and understanding than anyone else in any realm. She inherently knew what people needed and allowed them to simply _be_ without expectations and judgments.

"Think of the meditative exercises you used to control your wolf. They'll work similarly with magic, dull the desire, clear your thoughts of it, focus them," Belle murmured and moved blonde hair to the side, exposing her neck. She dropped slow, meaningful kisses against the sensitive skin, her hand never ceasing the teasing circles over Ruby's stomach and hips. Whatever thoughts Belle planted obviously worked because Ruby calmed and even leaned into the sensual embrace without baking the back lawn.

Emma smiled at the tender moment and slipped inside the kitchen. Her assistance only hindered the progress Ruby seemed to be making for the moment, so she stepped inside to find her younger daughter and check her gums. Where the hell was Regina when you needed her? In the kitchen, apparently.

Emma smiled, her heart tugging to the other woman as she closed the sliding glass behind her. "Hey, feeling better?" She called softly to the woman standing at the doorway between the kitchen and foyer with an confused grimace.

Regina's face pinched tighter, and she moved to the stove. "Moderately, I suppose. How on earth did I end up in bed?" She looked expectantly at Emma as she switched on the burner to heat the kettle.

"You laid down because your migraine got really bad. Don't you remember? The pain must have been pretty fucking awful if you're having blackouts from it," Emma empathized but kept her distance from the older woman. After her romantic declaration earlier that day, the new information she'd gathered from Amelia only made everything worse. What if she couldn't get everything back? Get them back?

"I suppose it was," Regina agree groggily. Clearly, she'd just stumbled from bed and returned to the last place she remembered everyone occupying. "Have you assembled your abominable cooking machine?"

Emma chuckled at the insults Belle and Regina kept throwing at her pretty new baby. "Yep. 'Bout two hours left on the ribs."

"I thought you were never eating meat again," Regina teased her wife in the wolf's body, referencing her morning-long lamentation and vomiting of raw meat.

"Yeah, well, now I'm craving it. Must be a wolf thing," she said with a shrug. "Hey, Annabel started teething," she changed the subject in the next breath and grinned at Regina's surprised and happy expression. Her daughter reached a huge milestone in baby development, and she beamed with pride.

"I thought she might. She's been extra fussy," Regina murmured more to herself than to Emma as she crossed to the freezer. She pulled out a baggie of frozen fruit and dropped it on the island and snagged a clean dish cloth from the drawer, drenched it in water at the sink, and wrung out as much excess as possible.

"I used to do this for Henry, only thing that really soothed him," she explained and dumped the solid blueberries into the towel, squeezing it into a compact ball and twisting the fabric around the ball. "Where is she?"

"Henry's got her somewhere," Emma answered with a laugh. Good thing their teenagers were reliable. "Wait on your tea, I'll go find her." She found them all in the living room and relieved them of the youngest and returned straight away.

Annabel fussed slightly when Regina removed the cold, slobbery ring from her mouth, but her emerald eyes lit up brightly when she replaced it with the frozen blueberries. Regina made a surprised face at her daughter, her emotion vein throbbing instantly. "Do you like blueberries, my sweet girl? They're my favorite, too," she cooed at the infant, completely forgetting about the presence of her wife as her daughter gnawed the fruit towel enthusiastically.

Emma smiled at them. Somehow everything hurt less when she watched Regina with Annabel. "I'm going to make an appointment with Dr. Hopper," she blurted, her words and thoughts incongruent. "I figure that we've got enough stuff to sort through as a family that I should probably get some extra help for the issues that don't really involve everyone else, like Neverland and my mommy and daddy issues."

"I think that's very wise, Emma. When Katy has reached a stable point, I believe a few family sessions with him may be profoundly beneficial," Regina agreed easily, but most of her attention remained on the little girl making yummy faces at the taste of the blueberry juice she sucked out of the towel.

Emma stepped behind her and rubbed her arms from shoulder to elbow and back again. "Regina, I think you should see him, too. This hasn't been easy on any of us, but you've lost me over and over again. That's got to do something to you." God, she felt so good to know how to handle Regina. It was instinctual, inherent. The only thing missing was her memories of the woman. Somehow, she retained that childish glee she felt as Younger Emma and recovered the strength and stability and dependability of Older Emma.

Regina stiffened painfully, and a band of static tension filled the room as her demeanor spiraled into something dark and unreadable. She shrugged out of her grasp and turned swiftly to face her. "The only words I wish to hear from you, Savior, should pertain to how you intend to save Katy."

"Regina, what the hell? Seriously, we're back to that - Savior and Evil Queen? What the fuck is that? And yes, I feel horrible about what Katy is going through, but we have two other children. God only knows what sort of complexes we've already given Annabel, and poor Henry is being so strong for everyone but he's not stupid. He knows what we went through. I can't imagine how tough it's been on him."

"Henry was never abused as Katy has been, Dear, that makes them different. Annabel cannot even speak yet, so what exactly is your concern with her?" Regina snapped coldly, and Emma flinched at the harsh tone. How had she gone from looking at Annabel with stars in her eyes to speaking about the infant as though she didn't matter?

A sharp cry tore her eyes from Regina's dark gaze. Annabel squalled again, chin quivering, eyes large and scared. Surely, she hadn't understood them, but she certainly helped drive home the point. The whistle of the kettle only made the girl cry harder. Rather than attempt soothing her, Regina practically shoved the creature into her arms and bumped her shoulder as she passed.

"What the hell is your problem?" Emma demanded in a hoarse whisper, attempting to keep her voice lower to avoid startling the infant more. Anger scorched her chest, but she sucked big breaths to maintain a calm façade before she scared their daughter, too. She jostled the infant, settling her almost instantly.

"My problem, Savior," she whirled and pinned Emma against the island with her hips, "is that I find you far too attractive in this body," Regina purred and ran her hands up Emma's sides. "The woman I married in the body of a woman I have lusted for since the moment I laid eyes on her at the head of Snow White's army. The sheer power that rippled from her lithe body as she sprinted fearlessly into battle proved enough to distract me from my task."

Emma bowed her head and turned it to the side, unable to shove the other woman away due to the infant in her arms. Regina grinned maliciously, reveling in the wound she'd inflicted. She grabbed the hand with the fruit towel in it and guided the limp limb to Annabel's mouth, uncaring of the shimmer of tears in the other woman's eyes. "Better keep her mouth cold or she'll start shrieking again."

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Emma asked again, much less forcefully and without raising her head. Regina's abuse scarred her, knocked her off-kilter, but she saw no reason to hide that from Regina. "It was never a secret that you and Ruby were physically attracted to each other, but you've never rubbed that fact in my face before. It's cruel, Regina, especially when I'm trying to make things right with her and fighting so hard to make things right with us."

"I'm a woman with a broken heart," Regina hissed viciously, mere inches from her lips. "I needn't explain myself to you." With that, she stalked from the kitchen, heels tapping smartly. What had she said that triggered such a violent mood swing?

Emma released the breath she'd held unconsciously and looked down at her daughter's watery green eyes, a mirror of her own. "I'll get her back, Squidgelette," Emma assured the girl, holding her closer for her comfort as well as her mother's. She only hoped she made a promise she was capable of keeping.


	14. Family

Thank you all for the reviews, my lovelies! Enjoy!

Songs: Amarillo Sky by Jason Aldean, Ladies Love Country Boys by Trace Adkins

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><p>"Emma." No response.<p>

"Emma," Belle called again with the same result. Emma sat on the steps of the deck and clutched her infant daughter close to her chest. The sky dulled with pinks and oranges though the sun wouldn't set completely for another couple of hours, but the mood in the Swan-Lucas household darkened hours ago.

"Emma," Belle tried once more and lowered her exhausted body to the step beside her friend. She really just wanted to snuggle up next to Ruby, watch television and nap for the remainder of the evening, but that really wasn't an option when her world crumbled around her. She hoped like hell they prevented it catching as well.

"What?" Emma exclaimed as though her mind hadn't drifted miles away. Obviously, she'd not heard Belle's previous attempts to catch her attention.

"Are you alright? The timer for your meat has been blaring for five minutes. Ruby is tending it," she assured her and glanced over her shoulder to the other side of the deck to ensure her partner did just that. Honestly, Ruby probably welcomed the brief reprieve from Regina's sniping and insults.

"I am so far from alright," Emma answered honestly. "I feel like I should be doing something."

"You are doing something, Emma. Eva and Lauren are doing what they can for us, and Amelia sent for some books to brought to the hospital. Right now, we need to focus on repairing the damage to our family, and that can only be achieved by doing exactly what we are doing, forging bonds that had been broken, mending those that haven't been completely destroyed." Belle wrapped a hand around her shoulder, fingertips resting upon a jutting collarbone. Emma felt better in the presence of the calm, methodical woman.

"When we were in the dreamscape," she started, staring off into the yard as her mind recalled every vivid picture. She shook her head and glanced down at Annabel, napping peacefully in the safety of her mother's arms. She'd not set the girl down since Regina scared her two hours ago.

"You can tell me, Emma. There's no judgment here, for you or Regina," Belle allayed her fears.

Emma managed a partial smile and covered the hand on her shoulder. "I know. There never is with you," she venerated the quiet soul and fierce heart of her friend.

"Well, perhaps a miniscule amount when you leap from balconies in my fiancée's body," Belle lightened the mood slightly, and Emma snorted.

She wrapped her arm around the pregnant woman's back and pulled her close, dropping a kiss onto the crown of her head. Belle scooted closer and rested her head on the familiar shoulder. She missed Ruby's body and took a selfish, guilty-pleasure moment to revel in the feel of it again. With a content sigh, she wrapped an arm around the wolf's thin waist and closed her eyes. Emma rested her cheek against frizzy blonde hair and simply breathed. How had they survived the past two months without Belle?

"I missed you, Belle. The past two months have been hell, not that I actually remembered much of you, but we almost didn't make it," Emma admitted quietly. Even with amnesia, Emma understood the importance of the librarian's role in their lives, felt the absence of her subtle strength and unbendable will.

"I suppose one of us needed to be sound of mind in order to reconcile the shreds of this family," Belle surmised distractedly. Though the statement held merit, the guilt of her mad sprint from Storybrooke and the disaster unfolding in their lives churned her stomach. If Granny or Bethany had died in the fire or Emma had died in the accident, she'd never have recovered from that, just as she'd never fully recover from her actions at Breck. Except now she actually had things to lose. If Emma died, Regina would never have accepted her back into the family. Game over. She knew the elder witch harbored anger towards her for the incident but had yet to speak of it.

"I guess you're right. On the bright side, this whole body swap thing brought my memories back," Emma reasoned, finding the silver linings in a very black thunderhead.

"I'm so happy, Emma. I see the difference, I can feel it," Belle agreed and nestled tighter into Emma's embrace.

"I wish I could have been like this in that damn dreamscape. It was awful." She pulled both Annabel and Belle closer to fight the involuntary shudder that rippled through her body.

"What happened in there, Emma? It may help explain why Regina is so angry," Belle nudged her gently.

"The Evil Queen," Emma said simply, and it explained everything. She glanced down at Annabel again, allowing the sight of the sleeping infant to tug her mouth upwards slightly. No wonder Regina fought so fiercely for Henry when she first arrived in Storybrooke. Not that she loved Annabel more, but this bond created something, changed something, within her soul.

"You traveled through memories only of Regina as The Evil Queen?" Belle clarified. Emma nodded and sighed deeply.

"She killed Lauren's parents. I'm not sure how Lauren is so loyal or forgiven because she did it right in front of her the day she took her captive," Emma said gravely. Perhaps Lauren blocked the memory as Regina obviously had.

"Succubi are very forgiving creatures. They feel the energy of others. It's difficult to remain angry when you have the ability to feel the remorse of those who have wronged you. It's not quite like Eva's ability, Lauren can choose to connect with other beings, just like when we combine our magic," Belle explained the little she knew of Lauren's particular species, and Emma hummed, nodding absently.

"I guess that makes sense," she murmured and looked at Annabel again. "She killed so many people, Belle. Every memory jumped from one massacre to another or some way that someone screwed her over. I mean, that stuff never went away, she just got better at concealing it. She's still The Evil Queen even if she's not evil anymore."

Belle nodded. "She's always had the potential to be, but now she has us and Ruby and the kids. She'll recover, but I think that perhaps she needs us to accept that side of her more. I'd been thinking about that since last night when she spoke of her proclivity for and enjoyment of violence. Those qualities hadn't simply disappeared because she fell in love, and we need to accept them if we hope to help her."

Emma sighed. Belle was right. Ruby always claimed that Belle was right no matter the subject, and Emma felt compelled to believe her. Belle squeezed her waist snugly and kissed her cheek before sitting up straight. Emma rubbed her back lightly and returned her gaze to Annabel.

"Hey guys, dinner is ready," Ruby called across the patio. They glanced over their shoulders to find a bunch of covered dishes and place settings on the table. Katy and Alex had joined her at some point, and Henry carried cups through the sliding door.

"I'll inform Regina," Belle offered graciously, and Emma nodded her permission. She wanted little to do with the other woman at the moment. What she'd said earlier that day reflected her true thoughts and desires without alcohol to blame. Regina wanted Ruby, and without her memories, she fell in second place even though Ruby only had eyes for one woman, and it wasn't Regina.

A rumble of a diesel indicated the arrival of Caleb, and Emma smiled. He actually came, either of his own volition or Amelia's influence. She raised herself from the step, waiting for the stiffness in her joints that never came. Damn, no wonder Granny outworked all of them. Wolves have excellent joints. She deposited Annabel in her play pen and covered her to trap the warmth of her own body heat in the absence of her mother's. She barely noticed the transition.

Regina appeared with Caleb and Bethany trailing behind. Belle smiled brightly at her little sister and kissed her cheek. "Happy birthday, Bethany," she murmured in her ear, and everyone else jerked in surprise.

"Whoa, it's your birthday?" Emma blurted. Bethany nodded bashfully, looking at her sister on procedure instruction. After another round of happy birthday's and hugs, Bethany swatted them all away and edged towards the outside of the group, not used to such enclosed people walls. They moved onto Caleb next, saying their greetings a bit more reservedly.

He gave them all his southern boy grin, flipping his shaggy brown hair. "I'm just going to take that plate and get back to Amelia, but I wanted to drop this by for Katy," he explained to Emma in Ruby's body.

"It's from me and Amelia," he continued, growing more embarrassed by the second under the intense scrutiny of the women surrounding him. How the hell had Henry survived this long with no guys? Boy was going to be well-versed in female ways and make some woman extremely happy one day. He shook the though away and pulled a pair of drumsticks from the back of his tight jeans.

Katy took them slowly, confused. He shrugged his large shoulders and tossed his hair again. Belle sighed harshly and turned her back with one hand on her hip and the other fanning her face. Caleb and Ruby's eyes narrowed at the visceral reaction, one in confusion and the other in jealousy. Sure, he was a good-looking guy, but no one but Belle ever caused such an immediate reaction in her. What the fuck was that about?

"Drumsticks?" Katy snapped in her short-tempered way that made her endearing as it always had Regina.

"Yeah, we got you a full drum set for your birthday, but we thought you'd like something to pound on besides Henry." He grinned down at the boy and slapped his shoulder in companionship, guys sticking together and all that. "So, just pretend to be excited again next month, okay?"

"You got me drums," Katy almost squealed. Her hazel eyes lit up with excitement, and everyone tensed when she jumped at the man. His lumbering height prevented her feet from touching the floor when her arms wrapped around his neck. He touched her back lightly, cautious of entrapping her physically after all the abuse she endured, his huge hands reaching almost from one side to the other though. The bold affection she showed him surprised all of them as they'd expected her to shy away from men, especially one that might have easily overpowered her like Caleb. He easily had a foot on her height and twice her width, but his reverent eyes told everyone who saw them that he recognized the responsibility placed on him simply by the fact that Katy still trusted him.

"Come on," he said and lowered her to the floor, sensing the growing tension in the overprotective mothers pulling back their lips in snarls at the prolonged affection he gave their daughter. Okay, they hadn't actually snarled, but he took the hint anyway. "They're on the back of my truck. I'll help you set them up."

Katy skipped at his side, practically pulling the man through the house. Regina rubbed her forehead, unable to complain about the racket in her foreseeable future when Katy actually smiled and felt genuinely excited about something. Henry followed the gentle giant towards his truck. Ruby grinned. If they continued learning new instruments, they could turn their family into a band.

"Emma, please take my daughter and help them," Belle whispered and nudged Emma with her elbow. Emma's brow furrowed, but she obeyed the flustered woman's wishes. A part of her wondered if Belle felt uncomfortable leaving Katy alone with a man, even one they trusted.

The second they stepped into the kitchen, Belle whipped towards Ruby, grabbed her face in both hands, and brought their lips together forcefully. Ruby's hands fell around her hips instinctually, but the larger breasts pressing against Belle's stomped on her passion if not her arousal. Ruby stared at her lover, chest heaving with the effort of keeping up with her kiss.

"We must switch your body back soon," Belle hadn't just said, she practically threatened. Fingertips tightened in Ruby's hair, and she gently pushed Belle from her, keeping her at arm's length from Emma's body.

"Seriously? Caleb turned you on by stepping into your sight for 30 seconds." She tried unsuccessfully to keep the venom and jealousy out of her voice.

"I'm sorry, Sweetheart. He's a very virile man," Belle explained as logically as possible, but the listless tone of her voice and flush of her face only flared Ruby's irritation. She fanned herself again and lifted thick hair from her neck. At Ruby's dejected arm cross, she touched her face tenderly. "It's a chemical reaction due to the increased estrogen and progesterone in my body. Nothing more," she assured her wounded lover.

"When I carried Annabel, I once had a fantasy about Archie," Regina chimed in, saving her floundering friend. Surely an attraction to Caleb merited less embarrassment than that.

"Seriously?" Ruby deadpanned.

Regina nodded. "It was the curly hair," she explained, making motions of grabbing the shorter hair and chuckled at Ruby's mortified expression.

"I never want to be pregnant," Ruby decided, shaking her head at the horrifying task of coping with bizarre dreams and unpredictable hormones.

Bethany laughed, a soft, high pitched sound much like Belle's. "I'm apt to agree with you. Though Caleb's devilish attitude and advanced boyish appearance does portray a certain virility and inspires unsuspecting females to swoon under the enchantment."

Ruby squeaked, gesturing emphatically with her hands while no words fell immediately from her mouth. "How can four women in relationships with other women live in this house and still end up talking about men like slabs of meat? I mean, Belle, you're gay! You've always been into women. What about your maid that scratched your hip… what's her name?"

"Aliya?" Bethany piped in, completely surprised as Regina by the knowledge.

"Yes, Aliya," Ruby sputtered.

"Certainly, I was attracted to her, but she could never have provided a child," Belle said innocently, a mischievous glint in her sparkling blue eyes.

"Come now, Wolf Pup. You feel nothing towards the man? We've all experienced both sexes." Regina teased her, apparently over her latest mood swing. They might have stopped at simply talking of pregnancy hormones if Ruby hadn't reacted so squeamishly.

"Not really. When I slept with men, it was to quell my wolf, except with Peter and we were so inexperienced and shy that I didn't even, ya know. I've never made… I am not talking about this," Ruby huffed, hunkering between her shoulders in attempt to hide from what turned from subtle to blatant ribbing from the other three. Belle melted a little at the sudden influx of knowledge about her lover. Ruby had never made love to anyone until her? It was sweet.

"You never dream of being held against the wall by a well-muscled body and fulfilling every animal passion you've ever felt?" Regina continued, not particularly affected by the previous admission. Belle hummed at the description and grinned. Of course, she never felt unfulfilled in that department. With Ruby's strength and wolf passion, she pretty much guaranteed that whenever the mood struck them. Lucky.

"Uhhh, not in so many words," Ruby mumbled, eyes flicking to Belle and then to the ground quickly.

"You want me to wear the strap-on?" Belle asked. They only really ever used it around the full moon, but it felt pleasurable enough to bleed into the rest of their month.

Ruby crossed one arm over her stomach and held the other elbow, ears flushing a bright red. "I mean, if you really want," she mumbled almost discernibly, unable to meet.

"Aww, Sweetheart," Belle crooned and wrapped her arms around Ruby's neck, turning to the side so as not to obstruct her face from the other two women. "I'd do that for you," she eased her lover's insecurities easily if not her embarrassment. Despite her multitude of lovers, Ruby still blushed when she spoke of doing anything with Belle… except with Emma. Emma got it.

"I'm a virgin and still less red than you," Bethany rubbed salt in the wound, and Ruby deflated, hiding her face in Belle's hair with a groan.

"Shush, Beth, we're having a moment," Belle instructed with amusement in her tone.

A loud squall from the house killed the moment, and they all moved towards the door. Emma paralyzed them all in place when she barreled onto the patio and slammed the sliding glass behind her, panting and ghostly pale. She leaned her forehead on the door and caught her breath, unable to speak yet.

"Emma, you're bleeding," Regina pointed out and touched a single finger to her wife's neck. Emma spasmed and jumped back, growling at the door like a woman possessed. She pointed emphatically, prancing in place. On the other side of the glass, Gizmo stalked from one edge of the glass to the other.

"That…it…pounce," she stuttered unintelligibly, telling them with her hand gestures that the tiny black creature pounced her from somewhere high. Ruby laughed obnoxiously while the other three more demure women had the decency to cover their smiles with palms and fingers.

Henry appeared at the door and scooped up the feline. He opened the door and said, "Go ahead and start without us. Katy and I are going set up her drums."

"Good. No way I'm going back in the house with that beast lurking about. Freaking guerilla tactician," Emma declared, glaring at the little furry thing in her son's arms and plopping into a seat.

"I am starving," Belle agreed.

"You have ten minutes," Regina granted the boy, and he pumped his fist in the air and sprinted back through the kitchen. Regina shook her head and closed the sliding glass.

"Go ahead, Baby," Ruby said and kissed Belle's temple. "I'm going to make your smoothie."

The other four women sat down and uncovered the dishes as they scooped food onto their plates. Emma tore the rib racks into three sections, dispersing them onto their plates and then claimed an entire rack for her own. At their confused glances, she shrugged and said, "Have you seen how fucking skinny Ruby is? I'm going to fatten her up while I'm in here." She slopped an obscene portion of mashed potatoes onto her plate for emphasis and took two rolls from the cloth-covered basket.

"I'll try everything else on my second plate," she informed them and ripped off a rib.

Slowly, everyone else trickled to the table, Ruby first, and then Henry and lastly Katy with Alex on her back. Regina made Caleb a to-go meal in a large, flat plastic container, and he accepted another hug from Katy much less awkwardly than the last time. Annabel cried in her playpen, and he lifted her up and handed her to Emma in Ruby's body who reached for her faster than the other women at the table. He thought the desperation in her eyes felt odd, but he handed the baby to her without question.

"I'll make a bottle," Belle offered and disappeared inside.

Caleb hooked his thumbs in the pockets of his jeans. "I do have a message from Amelia. Please bare in mind that these are her exact words and not mine." Everyone nodded curiously, and he cleared his throat. "I have another whole in my gut. Enjoy the headaches, bitches," he mumbled the last word, his voice far more embarrassed and reserved than Amelia's would have been.

"Wolf, I wanna see Mia," Alex demanded huffily. She adored the woman for whatever reason. Amelia's skill with children lacked finesse… to put it politely, though she tried her damnedest.

"We'll go tomorrow," Ruby promised from Emma's mouth, and the little girl hugged her about the waist.

"Thanks, Temma," she spurted excitedly, uncaring of which of the four took her.

They thanked the man who ambled off, exhausted by his brief brush with the Swan-Lucas women, and Henry who popped up from his plate and waved. "Bye Caleb!" The man chuckled at the sauce widening Henry's toothy grin and waved.

Belle returned with a bottle and then returned inside at the confusion of everyone else. When she returned, she held a cake with a giant "20" candle lit. in the center. Of course, Belle remembered her baby sister's birthday. Bethany looked incredibly concerned when she removed her mostly empty plate and set the cake in front of her.

"I don't understand," she admitted honestly and blinked up at her big sister.

"It's a birthday custom in this world. You close your eyes, make a wish, and blow out the candle," Belle explained and set a hand on the girl's shoulder encouragingly.

Bethany barely hid her watery eyes as she clamped them shut, took a moment, and then extinguished the flames. Everyone clapped, and Bethany glanced around, bewildered and shocked. Belle reached behind her back and snagged the tiny box she had tucked into the waistband of her skirt. Bethany covered her face with a tiny sob of joy.

"I can't believe you remembered my birthday," she said, muffling the words with her hands.

Belle pulled one from her face and placed the wrapped box into it. "Of course I remembered, Bethany. You're my baby sister, and I cannot begin to describe how incredibly blessed I am that you are still in my life after believing for so long that you'd died. I…" Belle sniffed, her own emotions taking over. "Just open it."

Bethany laughed self-consciously and tore into the paper. Within it was an ornately carved wooden box, and the girl gasped when she opened it. Belle smiled triumphantly and gingerly removed the necklace from the box and attached it around Bethany's neck.

"I'm glad I returned in time to give it to you on your birthday. I got this for you in New Mexico," she explained and adjusted the turquoise and silver hand-crafted jewelry. It took a certain sophistication that Bethany certainly possessed in order to pull it off, and the lighter color pulled the deepness of her blue eyes to the forefront. "I remember you had a fascination with a similar stone in our realm.

"Belle, it's…" she fingered the necklace, loving the way the weight felt on her neck. "It's perfect." The sisters hugged for a prolonged moment and then parted mutually.

Belle tucked a few strands of unruly hair behind Bethany's ear and nodded towards the cake. "Regina helped me make a Boston Crème Pie. You still prefer cream-filled desserts to the bready ones, yes?" Bethany nodded, too emotional to speak anymore.

"Sooo, what'd ya wish for?" Ruby prodded, pulling them through the charged moment with the insistence of a hungry puppy, and everyone chuckled.

Bethany smiled brightly at the question and glanced around the table. "This," she said simply and then lowered her eyes bashfully to the cake as she cut off slices for everyone.

She needn't have elaborated. They'd all wished for this, too, more times than they cared to admit. It was a little broken and frayed at the moment, but they somehow remained a family. And with a little help and work, they intended to stay that way.


	15. How Many Bookworms Does it Take

Here ye be, my pretties!

Songs: All I Wanna Do and Mz. Hyde by Halestorm.

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><p>"What is it doing?" Ruby practically screamed and raised her arms in the air. Gizmo snuggled onto her lap, believing her to be Emma. Ruby allowed it, mostly because Belle leaned into her and scratched the little terrorist behind his ears and under his chin. Within seconds, the beast began vibrating.<p>

"Belle, what the fuck is it doing?" Ruby asked again on the verge of a full-blown conniption. "Is it going to explode? Why? Why is it going to explode on me? Or puke? Or whatever this means?"

"He's purring, Sweetheart. It means he is happy," Belle explained, barely. She followed the sentence with a light chuckle and covered her mouth.

"Why? Why is it doing that?" Emma's phone blaring saved them from answering the question. Gizmo glared up at Ruby, personally offended that the object in question blasted his kitty ear drum, jumped down, and sauntered towards the kitchen. Ruby answered the phone gratefully. Never had Eva Zambrano's voice sounded so wonderful in all her life.

"Yeah, that's not a problem," Ruby chirped jovially into the phone and glanced across the living room to Emma.

They'd only just migrated inside when their two youngest decided they needed a bed instead of a warm body upon which to sleep. It'd been an insanely beautiful evening. Bethany behaved awkwardly and spouted things no one but Belle and Regina understood. Henry hammed everything up, entertaining them right alongside Emma and Ruby. Regina mostly brooded silently but cracked more smiles than she wanted them to realize. Katy and Alex pretended to play the drums, and as annoying as that was to all of them, it still fell short of the demonstration she gave of their true power. The damn things rattled the entire floor.

And now, they settled down to watch television with Alex and Annabel tucked into their beds and Bethany en route to her apartment, together but not obligated to speak. It was a really good day for the most part.

"Are we up, Rubes?" Emma asked and scooted to the edge of the loveseat.

"Yep. Amelia needs my blood, well, your blood. Lauren wants to play around in our chi to see about usage or something that sounds equally weird and invasive, not that we'd ever feel it," Ruby spouted happily. Any progress towards switching them back jolted a spark of adrenaline through her. Emma and Regina might have been damaged by this particular experience, but she and Belle grew closer every day, and she ached to make love to the woman. She refused to feel guilty for that no matter how badly she felt for her friends.

"Amelia is mixing potions in the hospital?" Belle asked incredulously, redirecting her lover's thoughts from their situation.

"Eva apparently gave her a set of old lab equipment and had it set up in the basement to keep her from checking out and going home," Ruby explained with a little grin. She didn't have to like the neurosurgeon to see why Emma took to her instantly. Amelia Shepherd was nothing if not spunky and unafraid to toss her weight around… or a hissy fit, depending on the needs of the situation. Plus, she saved Emma's life and Katy's and never once questioned them, even when they'd accused her of betraying them. Loyalty oozed from her, along with promiscuity and a mouth and attitude fit for a toilet.

"That fucking idiot," Emma swore. No one expected Amelia to fix this immediately, just as they hadn't expected Lauren and Eva to drop everything and come running. Everyone needed a minute to heal, to breathe, to have an orgasm.

"Pretty much. Apparently she has a theory on the whole memory potion thing," Ruby agreed and then kissed Belle's temple. "Shouldn't be more than an hour, Baby. Think you can stay awake that long?"

Belle rubbed her sleepy eyes and grinned up at the wolf. "Will you cut some cantaloupe before you go?" She asked cheekily. She'd not stopped eating since dinner, nibbling ribs and green beans and bowl after bowl of fruit. She drizzled honey on it at one point, and Ruby nearly lost her shit, something she intended to revisit later.

"I think I cut extra last time. Let me go see," she murmured happily and kissed Belle's cheek before skipping towards the kitchen where Regina insisted on cleaning up after their little barbeque alone and in silence. Ruby eagerly fulfilled every whim and fancy, from reheating ribs on the grill to running out to the store to buy cantaloupe when Belle took a hankering for it. (Apparently, the store manager asked her not to return unattended after her little display of magic in the poultry section.)

Emma felt a twinge of jealousy towards the wolf and tried to let it go before it took root completely. Ruby took care of Regina during most of her pregnancy, and now she repeated it all over again with Belle. She might not have remembered not being there exactly, but the knowledge alone sent a spark through her, darkening her mood just a tad.

"Ma, can I go with you and Aunt Ruby to the hospital," Henry yanked her out of the spiral of dark thoughts, and Emma smiled at her son. He probably wanted to go see Caleb. Boy needed a man to spend to time with now that David kept his distance due to Emma's amnesia. If Caleb wanted the job, she gladly handed it to him.

"Sure, kid, go grab your shoes. Want me to call David and Mary Margaret and see if you can spend the night?" She asked, wanting her son's happiness more than anything. The boy needed some attention before he started acting out.

"That'd be awesome," he chirped, his voice cracking in adolescence, and took off towards the stairs.

Emma got up to make the call in the foyer, and Katy finally settled on a channel. "Ever watched this, Belle?"

"What is it?" The librarian asked, nose wrinkling at the depiction of the filthiest house she'd ever seen in her life.

"It's called Hoarders. Basically, these people have a compulsive disorder that practically disables their ability to throw anything out. It's morbidly fascinating," Katy explained, already entrapped by the images rolling across the screen.

"Alright, but if it makes me sick, I choose the next show," she bargained, and Katy nodded absently, acknowledging her even if she'd not heard her.

"I need popcorn," she blurted and propelled out of the sofa the moment a commercial started. Belle smiled up at her and shifted her eyes to watch the girl sprint towards the kitchen. Though she'd experienced and committed some horrible things, Katy still behaved as she always had, which led Belle to the tentatively hopeful belief that she'd never pretended with them, that her affections were genuine and always had been.

Ruby returned a moment later, smiling triumphantly. "My hero," Belle praised and buried hands in tangled, golden locks as Ruby leaned over the arm of the sofa for a kiss.

"Mmm, I like the sound of that," Ruby returned in the same playfully sensual voice and kissed her pregnant lover without hesitation. "I love you so much, Belle. I know everything is screwed up at the moment, but I've never been happier than I am right now, making pancakes and cutting fruit. Makes me almost wish I could stay in Emma's body just to spend more time with you."

Belle hummed and wrapped her arms around Ruby's neck. "As wonderful as that sounds, Sweetheart, I really…" she dropped her chin and voice, staring intensely into Ruby's now green eyes, "…really want you to occupy the proper body."

"You and me, a week in the library for a no-clothes-allowed marathon of activities," Ruby suggested, surprised by the sultry rumble that became Emma's voice. No wonder Regina went nuts in the bedroom.

"What about the diner?" Belle asked, not actually caring as Ruby peppered her jaw and scar with little kisses that left her aching for longer contact.

Ruby hummed, vibrating her lips against her windpipe. "You're right, we'll have to keep our strength up. Tink can bring room service across the street." Belle giggled girlishly. The woman she returned to after two months of virtually no contact more closely resembled the one she'd fallen in love with, doting and sweet and deliciously wrapped up in desire for her instead of the heavy responsibilities that usually weighed her down and made her distant.

"You cannot abandon your responsibilities, Darling. We've two children on the way," Belle reminded her gently and pushed her away with a soft hand on Emma's well-defined pectoral muscle. "Although, I believe I made us a nest egg in my absence."

"What do you mean?" Ruby stopped reaching for her neck with her lips and focused on her words.

"Did you know there are places you can visit for the soul purpose of placing money against the chances of dice or cards?" Belle asked, wonderment in her eyes.

"You went to a casino?" Ruby deadpanned.

"Yes, in Las Vegas. I was quite successful in my endeavors there. After a while, a manager from the establishment asked me if I'd like a suite in their hotel, and they offered free tickets to the most wonderful acrobatic performance with dinner and an escort," Belle described her night as a princess once more, mesmerized by what must have been an overwhelming experience for the reticent, introverted woman.

"Whoa, hold up. Now when you say escort?" Ruby prompted.

"Oh, well, this wonderful gentleman, an employee of the casino, offered to take me to dinner, but when I tried to explain that I already had a partner, he excused himself for a few minutes and returned with a woman. Honestly, I was befuddled by the entire experience, but she offered pleasant enough conversation. From what I gathered, not many genuinely nice people appear in her line of work." Belle frowned at the thought. She'd obviously formed some sort of attachment to this woman.

"Now when you say line of work," Ruby prompted again.

"She worked for the casino. Weren't you listening? She was paid to ensure that 'big winners' are satisfied in every way," Belle explained, exasperation clear on her features.

"Now, when you say satisfied," Ruby prompted her one last time before Belle threw her hands in the air. She finally understood.

"Ruby Lucas, are you insinuating this woman intended to seduce me?" Ruby nodded sheepishly, cheeks flushing with the thought of it. Belle rolled her eyes and crossed her arms. "Well, stop. We had a perfectly lovely evening together. She was highly intelligent, held a mastery degree in biology."

"Master's," Ruby corrected.

"Precisely. We nearly missed our show so engrossed were we in the discussion of astrobiology during dinner. I held her arm as she escorted me through the incredibly dense streets. We watched a wonderful show, and then she escorted me to my suite where we continued our discussion until daybreak. She fell asleep, so I left her a very large tip and then took my winnings and left." Belle smiled fondly at the memory and brushed her knuckles over Ruby's cheek.

"You talked about astrobiology all night?"

Belle laughed and shook her head. "Of course not. I spoke of you and Alex and Storybrooke and our family. Her listening skills were exquisite. Honestly, I believe she helped me begin my recovery with her insight. Sharmila is a wonderful woman." Belle smiled again. "Coincidentally, her name literally means comfort or protection in the language Hindi, or so she claimed. I believe her."

"Sharmila is from India?" Ruby asked, not feeling more comforted by the great comforter.

"Oh yes. Her father was from Germany, her mother from India. She had the most interesting features." She drifted to the world she'd left behind in that huge, loud, flashy city.

"Okay, so then where did you go?" Ruby asked quickly, unable to bear the flare of jealousy any longer. It felt pointless even as her chest burned with it. Belle returned home to her, she had nothing and no one to battle for her love's affections.

"I met Paul, the truck driver I was with when I called, the day after that and travelled with him for nearly two weeks. He even introduced me to his family and allowed me to sleep on his sofa for two nights. I left them two stacks of money on the kitchen counter with a thank you note and caught a bus to New Orleans."

"Belle, how much did you win and how?" Ruby asked very seriously with a hint of fascinated wonder. Would this woman ever cease to surprise and amaze her?

"Oh, I have no idea. They gave me the cash in a little black briefcase. Most of the little discs were grey if that helps. I must have had fifty of them or more. Is that a lot?" Belle asked seriously. "I suppose a photographic memory and my IQ worked to my advantage. I simply estimated the probabilities by the tracking the numbers of the cards and how often they appeared."

Ruby laughed. "Counting cards is illegal, Belle. You're lucky you didn't get caught. I have no idea what the values of the chips are, but if they treated you like a queen, I'm guessing it was an obscene amount. Where is it?"

"Oh, I suppose it's still in my car parked in front of Granny's," Belle said nonchalantly, not at all concerned about the fact that she'd left so much money exposed and vulnerable to the general public. Not that many in Storybrooke would have deigned to ever rob Belle French; those who hadn't feared her respected her.

"I will pick it up while I'm out," Ruby laughed, shaking her head at her flaky genius. She leaned in for another kiss, lingering on those soft lips as long as possible. A thumb brushed the jagged scar on her face, and Belle shuddered, her usual reaction. Either from the acute sensitivity of it or the sensation of the mauled flesh caressed so lovingly, Ruby couldn't be sure. She planned to ask one day, but that moment wasn't the appropriate moment.

"Yo, Casanova, you ready?" Emma called from the foyer, and Ruby groaned into her neck, frustrated by anything that took her attention from Belle. Katy returned in the same mad dash in which she'd left and plopped onto the sofa, already focused on the television. Ruby sighed in resignation and kissed her chastely once more before following Emma and Henry to the front door.

Belle pressed the backs of her fingers to her mouth and allowed the wonderful sensation of being loved to warm her from the inside out. Katy allowed her a moment of blissful fantasy before curling up next to her with the popcorn in the curve of her stomach. Belle pointed to her bowl of fruit, unable to reach it with the girl's head on her thigh, raised to the perfect height with her feet tucked beneath her. Katy handed her the bowl and settled down instantly, completely engrossed in the spectacle. Before long, the librarian shared her obsession for the unconventional form of entertainment.

They stared raptly at the television, each shoving their respective snacks into their gobs without so much as a thought. The pregnant woman nibbled cantaloupe and the teenager, popcorn. Almost a full episode played before another person interrupted them. Regina wrinkled her nose, confused by the captivation of watching people clear a house with an obscene amount of stuff packed into it.

"Oh my god, they found her missing cat!" Katy exclaimed suddenly, barely controlling the bowl of buttery goodness on her lap from spilling all over the floor. Belle paled instantly and covered her belly, but her wide blue eyes never flickered from the screen.

"What on earth are you watching?" Regina demanded, disdain for the depictions evident in her voice. She pinched the bridge of her nose and wondered for the umpteenth time if she should have let Eva and Lauren know of the severe and sudden onsets of the vicious migraines.

"Hoarders," Belle answered. "Fascinating disorder. Sit down, find out for yourself," she added in a monotone, twisting a wrist in the general direction of the smaller sofa.

"Katyline, I've come to fetch you for your lesson, Dear," Regina ignored Belle and spoke directly to her daughter. Katy's face slowly turned from the television, slightly downtrodden.

"It's been a good day, Regina. Maybe we could skip it for this evening?" She asked hopefully, her hazel eyes appearing younger than they had in months.

Regina crossed her arms dangerously and glared at the girl. "It's been such a wonderful day because I've begun teaching you how to control your anger. Do you honestly believe that you've made true progress?" Something about the tone of her friend's voice raised Belle's hackles, and she slowly leaned forward to set her bowl of fruit on the coffee table as Katy stood.

"I guess not. It's just been a really good day, and I'm tired… the good kind, I mean," Katy explained dejectedly and stood. She seemed as though the life had been ripped right out of her, and Belle grabbed her hand.

"Oh, finish this episode with me. There are only a few minutes left," she pleaded with the teen, her gut churning with the fact that she'd literally just torn her between her and Regina. Something wasn't right, and Katy obviously loathed the idea of doing whatever they did.

Regina's eyes narrowed at the librarian maliciously, but Belle pretended not to notice as she pulled Katy back onto the sofa and curled up next to her, hands wrapped around her toned bicep. Regina turned on the toe of her pump and stalked back into the foyer. Belle waited until her footsteps clicked onto the tile of the kitchen before speaking, even then she glanced over her shoulder first.

"Katyline, what has Regina been making you do that upset you so quickly?" Belle demanded, her voice deep and gravely serious. "Have you told her how much it obviously bothers you?

Katy's brow furrowed and a shoulder shrugged dismissively. "She talks about stuff, gets me all worked up, and then she tells me how to separate the anger and pain from myself and tells me how to… I don't know, she calls it spindling… It's not much different from the techniques Captain used to channel grief into focus and energy." She shrugged again, and Belle's heart reached for the girl. Captain had done what she believed right, but the poor girl never learned how to grieve properly. She decided to prevent a repeat of that mistake with Regina, no matter how much the elder witch believed she helped.

"Spindling? As in spindling energy in order to trigger magic?" Belle cut her off, a hint of fear in her voice.

"Why would Regina want to teach me magic?" Katy asked as confused as Belle.

"I don't," Regina's dark voice snapped irritably. "If she doesn't learn control of her emotions, she's never going to learn how to work through them. I've been sharing the same techniques to gather magic for entirely different purpose," she explained darkly. It sounded plausible, but something in Regina's voice, like a mocking indignity meant to appease her instead of tell the truth, brought Belle to her feet and pulling on magic of her own, passively but just in case.

"Katy, go upstairs and get Alex and Annabel and take them to the car, please. I'll meet you out there in a moment," Belle ordered cryptically, eyes never leaving Regina's. The girl slipped around the two women, freaked out to her core, and Belle added, "Also, call Ruby and Emma and tell them to call me as soon as possible."

"What is the meaning of this, Miss French?" Regina demanded in her best authoritative voice.

"Katy needs to grieve, Regina. She doesn't need another regimen of meditative techniques and instruction on how and when to feel what she's feeling. That led us to this mess in the first place," Belle took a stand, unafraid of the woman glaring Archimedes' death ray into her face from the frenzied expression in her eyes.

"Because you know so much about child-rearing in the ten minutes you've been a mother," Regina shot back sarcastically but gave no time for a response. "This is for the best. Katy is dangerous, a trained killer with unpredictable thoughts and actions. She must be contained and controlled, harnessed even."

"Harnessed? Controlled? What the hell is wrong with you? That's your daughter you're talking about, Regina. She doesn't need to be controlled, she needs everyone to stop treating her like she's some sort of leper. The only thing you will achieve with this method is to isolate her further." Belle crossed her arms self-consciously. She'd not been a mother nearly as long as Regina, but she understood people, saw the progress Katy had made that day since she'd laid into her that morning. Katy needed to see emotions, feel them, express them. Not hide them until they built up enough to produce the same powerful magic that coursed through Regina's veins.

"Tell me exactly how you believe your opinion of the situation is above my own. You abandoned your lover and child to gallivant across the country without so much as a telephone call now and then to let them know you hadn't been killed," Regina went for the emotional throat immediately, but Belle rolled her eyes rather than feel the sting of the words.

"Just stop. Your intimidation bullshit might work on Emma and Ruby because they prefer to live in a blissful state of denial half the time, but I'm not them. Something's not right with you. You haven't been yourself since the dreamscape, and I will not stand idle while you attempt to destroy what little emotional bonds and familial stability that girl has left." Belle fought right back, holding the ground she'd gained with everything she had.

"You self-righteous, blood sucker. You intend to turn them all against me," Regina theorized maniacally, and Belle finally shuddered in her presence. All was not well in Denmark.

Regina grabbed her head unexpectedly and stumbled into the arm of the loveseat, barely stabilizing before she fell over. She winced at the harsh light and then found Belle's wide, fearful eyes. "Bookworm, you need to take the children and leave. I can't control her," she whispered and then screamed at the lightening surge of agony that ripped through her brain.

"Control who?" Belle ejaculated and grabbed Regina's shoulders rather than obey her commands. "Regina, what's happening? Control who?" Fear slithered around Belle's heart, and she sucked deep breaths, attempting to stay calm enough to connect with the earth's energy.

Regina grabbed her arms in a bruising vice and yanked Belle towards her. She barely caught her descent and grabbed the back of the couch for support, hovering over the other woman. Not a moment to react, Regina drew a line across her palm, and a thin line of blood followed the seemingly innocent fingertip. Her hand shook, like she fought an unseen force, but she finally thrust it upwards into Belle's chest hard enough to knock the air from her lungs. The hot liquid soaked through the light fabric of her pajama shirt and squished onto her skin.

"Amelia," Regina strained around clenched teeth. "Tell her to contain me. That should be plenty of blood for the circle." Belle's eyes narrowed in confusion, her mouth working but nothing coming out. What the hell happened to Regina?

The click and whoosh of the front door distracted Belle, and Regina wrapped a bloody hand around her throat, using magic to lift the petite woman from the floor as she gained her feet. She gagged for air, and Regina dropped her hand a moment later, gasping and fighting the invisible demon controlling her once more. The slick fingers trembled around her throat loosely, and Belle sucked a deep breath.

"She's going to kill Emma, Belle. She's going to take my light," Regina whispered in a wet, hoarse, terrified voice. Belle touched her shoulders again, and the unhinged sorceress allowed it. "Eva didn't bring me back from the dreamscape. I've been fighting to break through since that night." Regina screamed and grabbed her head, crimson smearing over one side of her face.

Belle held her shoulders tightly even though every instinct in her body told her to run. "Regina, who did Eva bring back?" No response. "Regina!" Belle shook her, trying to break through to the nearly catatonic woman experiencing blinding pain. "Regina, who did Eva pull from the dreamscape?"

A sudden blast of magic knocked Belle backwards into the middle of the foyer. She landed hard on her back and gasped for air, her hands moving immediately to her stomach. Before her eyes, Regina's features transformed into a dangerously placid expression, smug and condescending, and fear gripped Belle's heart. Regina lost the internal struggle with the demon possessing her body and mind. A mocking laughter echoed off the foyer as she stepped into it slowly and leaned over to touch Belle beneath the chin with pointed fingers and sharpened nails.

"The Evil Queen, of course."


	16. Wolf's Blood

Hello, My Lovelies! So sorry for my sabbatical! The day after I posted the last chapter to this story, my laptop died. Just went to sleep and never woke, poor thing. SO, it's taken me a bit to pay off the new one, but I have and I'm back and here we are.

Also, pixip53 has informed me that I have addressed something in this chapter that was also addressed in season 4. I have no idea what they've done on the show because I haven't watched season 4 yet, so please no spoilers in reviews or cries of outrage for lack of originality. (Or as someone called it in a review for The Color Red "Pulling an A&E"). Anyway, I'm being vague because I don't want to give anything away, so there.

Enjoy, My Sweets!

Songs: This is War by 30 Seconds to Mars

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><p>Belle allowed one moment. One moment to hold her breath. One moment to feel the crushing anguish of the words Regina uttered. One moment to look into Regina's soulless black eyes where a soft, compassionate caramel resided for so many years. Those eyes disappeared with her friend's humanity. Only Eva and Lauren could have understood exactly how a past identity had been pulled to the present with the aid of a seer, but if it was possible, they needed to contain the knowledge before it spread. Could those who died have been brought back? Pan? Cora? Rumpelstiltskin before she'd softened his heart? James, the spoiled prince and David's evil twin brother?<p>

"Regina," she murmured softly, much more calmly than she felt inside. "No one here wants to harm you, so you needn't harm me." Pulling her body with both hands, she slid slowly from the close proximity of Regina's face and sat up, careful to make no sudden movements. Once upright with her legs still beneath Regina's bent over form, she placed her hands over her still mostly flat stomach. The fall hurt but jolted too light to really do any harm to her children, not while she believed in the love she and Ruby shared.

"I consider containing me in a magical cell and forcing me into another dreamscape harmful, Miss French," Regina declared in a maniacal, condescending voice that Belle hadn't heard since her internment in Regina's tower dungeon.

A shiver rippled down her spine, and a harsh exhalation pushed through her nostrils quick enough to leave a small, momentary throb behind her eyes. Memories she'd thought permanently dormant rose up. A flash of Regina's gleeful eyes watching from the barred square in a thick wooden door. The scent of moldy hay that constituted her bed for years wafted from nowhere, a figment of her memory as real as the blood tickling the skin of her chest.

"Regina," she croaked, angrier with the tears constricting her throat than scared of the reminder of exactly what the woman before her was capable of. She shook her head, dislodging tears and memories with the motion.

Regina laughed mockingly. Belle winced at the horrifying sound and covered her ears. She closed her eyes and breathed deeply, calming her racing heart. If Regina refrained from and attack in her weakened and shocked state, she intended to hold her hostage, use her against Ruby and Emma. If she failed to talk or fight her way out of this situation, Ruby and Emma's current position left them practically helpless.

With that thought, she opened her eyes to find Regina – no, The Evil Queen – studying her curiously. That scared, broken girl she'd abducted 30 years prior had grown into a woman unafraid to fight, unafraid to die. She'd paid for her sins, hadn't she? Spent over 30 years in self-inflicted confinement of The Evil Queen as penance for her crimes against humanity. A surge of power burned through her veins, settled in her heart. Foreign magic, natural magic. It scalded her insides and left her panting for air. She'd paid for her crimes. Blue eyes matched black in hardened determination and rebellion.

"Welcome back, little bookworm," Regina taunted, mistaking her shock of the new power for acute fear.

"You don't get to call me that," Belle snapped heatedly. That nickname belonged to Regina, and she'd be damned if she allowed this half-human creature to bastardize it.

Regina snorted in amusement at her insolence and stood upright completely. "I imagine seeing me in the face of your surrogate mother to be particularly painful. What is it about you that causes insanity in your mothers?"

"Shut up," Belle threatened coldly and found her feet. Regina allowed it, almost like she wanted an altercation instead of simple surrender. She wished for shoes and the comfort of her scratched and scarred leather pants, her swords. They proved ineffective against Regina's magic, but they inspired confidence in herself.

Regina giggled gleefully, almost sounding like Rumpelstiltskin, merciless glee. She knew exactly how to twist the knife. "Have I pressed a sensitive spot, dear?"

Belle gritted her teeth, determined not to answer. If she lost control, any chance of survival slipped away in the adrenaline. She touched the earth's energy, instead. It mingled with the new magic in her blood, an unbreakable helix of raw power. Her skin crawled, vibrated from the inside out with the urge to unleash this new force within her. Maybe the pregnancy affected her magic?

Regina pulled a deep, refreshing breath through her nostrils. "You've grown quite powerful in our separation," she purred, praising the other woman's initiative. She'd always appreciated initiative that matched her own – just before she brought it to its knees or annihilated it. Belle, however, presented a particularly interesting opportunity. On one hand, Regina's invalid wife and slobbering puppy loved this woman, making her the perfect bargaining chip. On the other, she imagined the reward from Rumpelstiltskin for returning the smarmy witch far outweighed the perks of keeping such a dangerous captive. And, somewhere in the middle, Regina recognized the potential if this defiant creature could be broken. An ally nearly her equal in power if not brutality, though the Massacre of Breck certainly proved her worthiness in that arena as well.

"Regina, I know you're in there," Belle said calmly, practically ignoring the other woman's words.

"Regina's not home, dear, and you'll address me as such. Your Majesty will do…" She smirked. "…for now."

Belle snapped her fingers and fell into a defensive stance as black leather wrapped around her toned thighs and bare feet. "I will never bow to you again. None of us will, and we know for certain Regina would rather die than allow you to destroy everything she's worked so hard to build." A swell of satisfaction warmed Belle's chest when Regina's face tightened in anger. She'd struck a nerve, and the more focused she remained on her, the less she noticed the turning of an engine just outside. Katy, smart enough to sense the danger, protected her younger siblings. Good.

"Is that so?" Regina saved face, but Belle already wormed into her mind. Of course, they'd do everything in their power to spare Regina's life, but this bitch seemed to believe they'd kill her in a heartbeat if given the chance.

"It is," Belle reiterated. "So, do not think for one moment that any of us will hesitate to incapacitate you should the opportunity arise."

Her center of gravity dropped low as she squatted and surprised Regina with an Akido roll past The Queen as she lunged for the insolent librarian. The momentum returned her to her feet, and Belle spun on the ball of her foot and jabbed the heel of her hand into Regina's lower spine with the force of her whole body. Regina cried out as her weak spot took a major blow, stumbling forward.

Unconsciously, Belle covered her belly with one hand, protecting what she carried within instinctively. She protected the children within and those currently in the hands of a 16-year-old girl with no supernatural abilities. Gut knotting with that knowledge, Belle saved her magical reserves for a quick teleport once Katy reached a safer location from the mansion. Hopefully, she drove to Lauren and Eva at the hospital. Lauren's succubus control probably offered the only real defense against The Evil Queen.

Regina whirled from the front door, too angry to notice the distraction for what it was, and flung a wild ball of energy towards the unexpectedly spry librarian. Belle anticipated the erratic magic from the woman who held her captive for so many years. Pushing past her fear of recapture, she rolled forward again, ducking beneath the fireball. She stopped the roll on her knee with a grunt and kicked the shin of the other leg into Regina's calves.

If Regina presented a normal threat, she'd have mounted and restrained her as her back hit the floor, taking the breath from her. As it stood, she rolled away and pushed onto her feet, preparing for another attack despite Regina's desperate gasps for air. Regina reached for her again, this time squeezing an invisible hand about her throat. Belle gagged and gathered her energy. She needed to speak the incantation in order to unleash her magic, but Regina's snake-like constriction prevented it.

"Enough," Regina muttered, done with game Belle played. "You believe your strength comparable to mine?" Slowly, The Queen gained her feet without lowering her hand or the grip on Belle's throat. "You are nothing more than a plaything that Rumpel tossed aside and I scooped out of a rut in the road."

Belle gagged, choking on the words that refused to roll over her tongue. Panic set in, and she felt her pupils dilate as the connection with the earth grew weaker with each second in Regina's control. Memories overtook training. The woman, tortured and debased in every possible way by the unhinged sorceress, eclipsed the warrior fighting for her family. The Evil Queen terrified her because, unlike most, Belle knew firsthand exactly the level of atrocities of which Regina was capable. She needn't buy into rumors when she'd felt the humiliation of rape and starvation at the hands of this deranged woman.

"You obviously failed to hold his attention, dear," Regina taunted her, enjoying the tightening of Belle's face. The pain that inspired such a rush of adrenaline like nothing else in this world, or any other. "Your own true love turned her eyes to me when you couldn't satisfy her." Regina clicked her tongue, lips parting slightly with the sound.

Anger rose up like slow-moving goose bumps during a particularly inspirational scene of a movie. Her senses heightened even as she gagged for air. "Belle!" Ruby's voice called to her, and the librarian vaguely felt another presence with her, not close, but definitely a shift in energy. Their connection. It had to be. Regina and Emma experienced something similar in Neverland, a connection of mind and soul though miles apart.

Struggling to hold the connection, blood rushed into her ears and stole the precious little oxygen faster. The world around her blurred, the edges fading into darkness as Regina slowly strangled her to death. Heat flushed her cheeks uncomfortably, even as a bizarre coldness settled against her skin. Somewhere, she found enough energy to glare arrogantly at her challenger.

"Even your mother fell on your father's sword rather than look at you one more day," Regina jerked the metaphorical knife upwards one last time before Belle collapsed to the floor, coughing and gasping for much needed oxygen.

"Don't," she croaked, glaring fiercely up through frizzy blonde hair where she supported her weight on both arms on the floor, legs sprawled uncomfortably. "Talk about my mother," she finished wispily, too breathless to be forceful in words.

"Aww," Regina cooed condescendingly, pursing her lips in mock sympathy. Belle hated the sound. The Evil Queen overused it. It was old.

"Go to hell," Belle scratched through clenched teeth, her voice raspy and deep from the no corporeal suffocation. You are nothing in this world but a pitiable, insolent child. If you think Snow White's army presented a healthy challenge to your authority, then you truly haven't a clue what I am capable of, you common, insignificant, blood-sucking tick."

Regina stooped faster than Belle's disorientation allowed her to react and physically grasped her throat. The librarian breathed heavily, not constricted by the mostly threatening gesture of dominance. Belle stared up into her eyes, a sneer to match The Queen's on her lips. "Give her back to me or go away and let us mourn in peace," Belle mandated regally.

"Tell me," Regina whispered, her only a few inches from Belle's. It might have been a lover's embrace if not for the undiluted hatred coursing through Belle. "What do they call such delusional behavior in this world? Post-partum Depression? Do you think you'll try to drown your little mutts? Such things are genetic, are they not? Alex isn't big enough to save them like you saved Bethany."

"How do you know that? Everyone was told she died in childbirth," Belle demanded, too shocked to hold tightly to the anger any longer. If The Evil Queen had known this the entire time, then Regina knew, too, but simply chose to keep it to herself until approached about the subject. Belle never wanted to look into those kind, repentant caramel eyes more than in that moment. Regina, her Regina, knew the deep need for a mother in a royal court. Only the mother advocated for the daughter's wellbeing. Not everyone lucked into a doting father like Snow White.

"I was queen. I knew everything that happened within my royal court, even to the expendable assets," Regina berated her spitefully, as though she should have known the answer already.

Before Belle formulated a response, Emma in Ruby's body leapt from the top banister, landing gracefully behind Regina. Ruby materialized in a swirl of pink haze. Apparently, Emma schooled her fast on how exactly to teleport. Emma grabbed Regina from behind and flung her towards the living room, not bothering to see where she landed and sprinted towards Belle and Ruby. The element of surprise united the three.

"Ruby, you have to leave. Regina is The Evil Queen," Belle warned quickly, using the fresh adrenaline to find her feet.

"We know," Emma said evenly, Ruby's usually youthful features an etched rock face, scored by the elements of their lives.

"Baby, are you okay?" Ruby asked, and Belle nodded. Relief shook her hands, and she placed them over her belly to hide the tremble. Ruby returned the nod with a curt one. "Ems, let's go. Recon and rescue only," she reminded them of the hasty plan they'd created as they watched the scene unfold between Belle and Regina, the new information of Belle's life a tiny ping on their radar until they reached safety.

A violet pulse flew towards them, and Ruby absorbed the ball of magic with Emma's. Electricity coursed through her veins, simulating her flesh ripping from the inside out as she added Regina's magic to the healthy stock within Emma's body. She gritted her teeth as the second pulse immediately followed and brought her to her knees. She'd endured many painful things in her life, but Emma's body was designed for Emma's soul, not hers. She took a third before Emma ducked behind her friend and tackled her to the floor to avoid a fourth. It flew over their shoulders and crashed into a side table in the foyer, singing the floor and blowing a hole in the drywall – another wound to match the broken cabinet door, dented tea kettle, splintered frame of the doorway separating the kitchen and foyer, and Ruby's scorch marks on the wall when she'd first unlocked Emma's magic on the other side of the room.

"There you are, Darling," Regina called to Emma, meeting the chocolate brown of Ruby's eyes over a shock of golden hair. She leaned over Ruby's form protectively. "I cannot harm you in the proper body without risk of killing myself due to my unfortunate decision to link our hearts, but the wolf is fair game."

Ruby tried to stand, convulsed horrifically from the amount of magic surging in her blood, and hit the floor with a thump. Regina grinned smugly, a pearly white canine emphasizing the expression in a terrifying way. Emma covered her friend, and prayed Ruby's wolf more powerful than the force of the energy ball preparing to fly at them once more. She glanced up, meeting Regina's eyes, insolent to the end.

"No!" An almost inhuman growl distracted both of them. Belle moved slowly, a predatory grace in her composure. Her eyes glowed an angry wolf yellow, and red magic crackled at her fingertips.

"Belle?" Ruby whispered, muscles twitching with the effort of turning her head enough to see her fiancée.

"Hey, relax and breathe, Rubes," Emma instructed quietly and molded her body to Ruby's, though her eyes never left the savage expression on the normally stoic and docile librarian. "Belle's got this right now, but I need you to calm down so you can get us out of here, okay? Stop fighting it." Ruby listened and sucked deep breaths through her nose, exhaling through her mouth. Emma rubbed her shaking shoulder and watched the showdown between the other half of their messed up foursome.

"Give me the wolf, and you may have your precious Ruby in my wife's body," Regina compromised playfully, overly confident in her ability to best all three women. She raised an eyebrow, enjoying the game they played. She wanted Belle as a companion. Intelligence and power rolled into one beautifully compact form, not to mention royal conditioning. Why had she never seen the potential before?

"I said, no," Belle repeated slowly as she stepped in between Regina and the two prone women who stupidly gallivanted to her rescue only to need saving themselves.

Regina steeled herself for the challenge and tapped into the bulk of her magical reserves. Violet shot forth, and Belle pushed back with a stream of crackling neon red. The new magic popped and snapped, like a hot, dry log on a fire. The two streams met in the middle of the foyer, immediately cancelling each other out with a thunderous explosion. Belle snarled and immediately flung another pulse towards the psychotic queen who disappeared in swirl of purple smoke a moment before the magic reached her. Belle sneered at the clearing haze, triumphant.

Emma slowly stepped around a still twitching Ruby and gave a wide birth between her and Belle as she inched into her line of sight. The bright yellow dulled immediately, flickered, and then returned to the bright blue of the princess.

"Emma?" Belle asked breathlessly, and Emma jumped forward when those same eyes rolled into the back of Belle's head. She took her up in Ruby's strong arms and cradled the unconscious woman close to her chest.

"Belle!" Ruby shot to her knees, ignoring the seizing in her muscles. Emma lowered her to the floor and transferred the unconscious woman to her lover's arms. "I think she just blacked out, Rubes. She's breathing." Ruby nodded and pressed gentle fingers into her fiancée's neck anyway, just to be sure.

"What the frilly fuck just happened? What kind of magic was that?" Ruby wondered and brushed unruly hair from Belle's face, her own aching body forgotten.

"Wolf magic," Emma breathed in a deep timbre. "Remember in Neverland, when I brought us back, I tapped into you wolf. It looked like that."

"How is that even possible? I mean, Belle isn't the first mortal woman to carry a wolf baby." Ruby's obvious concern and fear tugged at Emma's heart, but she had no answers to offer.

"I have no idea, but let's get back to Lauren and Eva. It will help dispel some of that foreign magic in your body right now," Emma explained, and Ruby nodded, taking the words at face value. Emma understood her body and magic. Who was Ruby to question that? Magic sucked.

"Belle and the babies need to be checked out," she murmured as if the thought hadn't already crossed Emma's mind and gazed down at the limp woman in her arms lovingly. Belle displayed her badassery with grace and ferocity, and Ruby loved her more for standing up to The Evil Queen when her past trauma dictated that she should have quivered in fear and surrendered.

"Rubes?" Emma touched her shoulder on the side opposite Belle's head, ducking her own to meet watery green eyes.

"What if Eva can't fix us?" She asked with the insecurity of a child. She wanted Regina. Regina always formulated ten contingencies before they completely plan A.

"She will," Emma responded automatically, but doubt shimmered in her eyes.

"But what if she can't?" Ruby sniffed and held Belle closer. A part of her panicked to see the resilient woman so pale and weak, but the rational part of her brain assured her that Belle simply passed out from a magical surge.

"Then we deal," Emma confided quietly. "Belle will get used to that body, and we'll get used to everything." She squeezed the well-developed shoulder in her hand… her shoulder.

"What about Regina?"

"My love saved her once, I'll save her again," Emma declared in true Emma fashion, bloody stupid, big-hearted savior.

"You don't even remember her, Emma." Ruby dropped her lips to Belle's forehead and squeezed her eyes shut against the burn of tears. She added hoarsely, "Your body cries easier."

Emma chuckled and raised onto her knees to press a kiss to Ruby's temple, resting her forehead there. "That's saying something coming from the most emotional person in this house."

Emma sat back but left a supportive hand on Ruby's shoulder. "Come on. Let's go look at your babies and find our other babies."

"Ems, do you think it's true? What Regina said about Belle's mom?" The lost little girl returned to Ruby's expression.

"I don't know. Belle's never said anything?" Ruby shook her head, and Emma sighed deeply, anxiety tightening her chest. "One thing at a time, right?"

Ruby nodded and pulled at Emma's magic, which came much more easily with Belle in her arms. Not bothering to stand, she cradled Belle protectively in one arm, touched Emma's shoulder, and focused on the hospital. With any luck, they landed in the position they started.


	17. Frozen

Here ye be, my lovelies! Thanks for the reviews! Oh, and something I forgot to mention in the last chapter, thanks for everyone who sent PMs in my absence. I think I answered everyone, but in case I didn't, your concern was really touching. It's nice to be missed, even from fanfiction. :)

And a huge thank you to pixip53 for constantly putting up with my neuroticism and reading each of these chapters and giving me feedback as quickly as I write them... and for also helping me with editing for the writing sample I am sending to an MFA program in creative writing and keeping me sane during the process. You're the best, girl!

Enjoy!

Song: Frozen by Within Temptation

* * *

><p>"No," Emma said simply and crossed her arms over her chest. The word barely rose above the chatter of the room, but silence almost immediately followed.<p>

Their entire crew gathered in Belle's hospital room. Annabel slept in a corner in one of the hospital cribs, Alex on the bed with a tiny arm across Belle's stomach. Lauren and Caleb occupied Henry in the break room down the hall. Katy sat near Alex on an uncomfortable plastic chair with her knees pulled to her chest. Every so often, when the toddler whimpered or shifted in her sleep, the teen reached out and rubbed her back, glanced at Ruby on the other side of the bed anxiously, and returned her hand to the safe place around her shins. Amelia fiddled with some potion at the wheeled table behind Katy, and Eva brazenly questioned Emma's authority with one foot outside the door, probably listening for any distress signals from Lauren. Snow and David went to the station to sound the alarm to keep everyone inside and gather Granny and Bethany. Everyone showed up to do their part.

But, thus far, no one tossed out a plausible plan. They needed Regina.

"Emma," Eva started, using her "rational" voice. As if the woman had any other.

"I said, no, Eva," she repeated softly, deploying a tactic Regina taught her a while ago. Those who spoke softly garnered the most attention because people actively listened. She searched for the memory of the event and came up empty. She possessed the knowledge but no feelings or images attached to it. Anger swelled in her chest.

"I'm with Emma," Amelia piped up. "I've never been comfortable with the idea of killing anyone, much less Regina."

"She's not Regina," Belle added hoarsely. Everyone stirred when she tried to sit up. How long had she listened to their conversation before orienting herself enough to speak?

"Hey Baby, Alex is on you. You're safe, so just lay there and relax for a while," Ruby calmed her immediately, and the fact that Belle allowed it chilled Emma to the bone. They could have lost three people that night. She swallowed thickly and glanced at her friend's belly. If she'd not been told and seen the sonogram pictures, she might have thought Belle had slipped into one of her weight fluctuations.

"Ruby, the babies?" Belle attempted to sit up again, but Ruby cupped her cheek and leaned forward to kiss her temple, calming the panic.

"They're safe. Addison did an ultrasound while you were out, two heartbeats and two little jelly beans," the wolf-turned-witch assured her, holding up the little rectangle picture in front of Belle's face. She opened her eyes, glanced at the picture, and relaxed into the mattress and pillows once more, still exhausted from whatever magic took over her consciousness when Regina threatened Ruby.

"Regina is in there," Belle added to the miniscule amount of information they'd gathered about the situation.

"Explain," Eva clipped, turning her full attention on the woman with her eyes still closed against the bright light of the hospital room.

Belle wrapped one hand around Alex's back and blindly reached for Ruby with the other. Ruby covered it with both of Emma's and pressed it to her lips, eyes never leaving her lover's ashen face. A faint smile tugged at the corners of Belle's mouth. Fluttering, her eyes opened slowly, and she swallowed before glancing around the room, clearly confused about how she'd ended up there. Ruby brushed hair from her face and tucked it behind her ear, soothing her fears.

"Hey, Baby," she murmered.

"Are you okay, Sweetheart?" Belle asked, completely ignoring Eva's snappy demand for more information. Only Belle really knew what happened between Katy's departure and their arrival, and the gap was huge.

"I'm fine, a little shaking from the magic, but fine," Ruby answered just as listlessly and smiled back the other woman carrying her children.

"Guys, everyone is super fucking dandy," Emma destroyed the moment without remorse. "What the hell happened in there, Belle?"

Blue eyes turned towards The Savior, tired and slightly disoriented but not irritated by her friend's impatience. "Before The Evil Queen took over completely, Regina told me that she intended to kill Emma and trap Regina in the dreamscape forever. She was pinching the bridge of her nose before that happened, and then she completely changed, like Jekyll and Hyde," Belle explained slowly, her speech slurred and labored.

"She's been doing that since the dreamscape. Any thoughts, Eva? How could this happen?" Emma asked, trying her best to remain calm.

"Because this is never going to end," Belle murmured, her eyes turned to the ceiling. She blinked away rapid tears, face contorting with an intense emotion unreadable on the usually slightly stoic face.

"Babe?"

"Ruby, get me out of here," Belle demanded, but it was spoken so softly and so dejectedly that it barely registered in Emma's body's less sensitive ears.

"Belle?" Emma turned her attention to the woman gently moving her daughter to the side. Katy scooped Alex up and held her tightly against her chest and away from the panicking mother in the bed next to her. Luckily, she slumbered through the mild panic attack.

"I've been in Storybrooke for four days," she babbled to no one in particular and reached for the IV stint in her arm. Ruby snagged her hands and whispered to her softly, but still she struggled.

"Enough, Belle," Emma snapped. She pushed Ruby out of the way and held Belle's shoulders into the mattress, forcing those piercing blue eyes to hers, to the familiar light brown of Ruby's harboring her righteous anger. Ruby almost intervened, surveyed the room to see that no one else questioned Emma's intentions, and fidgeted uncomfortably near Emma's shoulder, trying to stay within Belle's sight line.

"Enough. Yes, you've been back four days. I'm sorry life is shitty right now, but at least you can remember it and hold the hand of the woman you love when you get scared. Some of us don't have that luxury. So, I'm going to let you up, and you're going to hold your daughter and Ruby's hand and help me figure this out. Understand?" When put in that context, Emma effectively embarrassed the woman for her outburst, reminded her how lucky she was. Most of their issues in their relationship spawned from a lack of communication or individual problems that clogged the flow of the duo, a far cry from the hell Regina and Emma endured to stay together.

Emma glanced to Ruby when Belle closed her eyes and nodded softly. Ruby took up Belle's hand again and touched her hair as Emma moved away from the hormonal mother. Belle rolled towards Ruby and buried her face in her chest. Emma gritted her teeth against the intimacy of the moment. Emma's face burned as the inherent anger that accompanied the wolf swelled and crashed, challenging the suppression cape. Ruby was one damn powerful beast.

"Has anyone considered the possibility that Regina's… uhh…" Amelia waved a potion bottle around, looking for the right word, "…situation might be a natural occurrence?" Everyone looked at her like three pig ears spouted from her face, and she shrugged as she turned back to her potion. "The woman has been through more than any of you. The last time she lost her True Love, she spent 15 years terrorizing the land and killing hundreds of innocent people before casting The Dark Curse. If I had to watch those two knowing that Belle's pregnancy will be what mine should have been with the woman I love instead of my best friends, I'd go a little insane, too."

"Regina does not have a split personality," Ruby protested, angry at the suggestion.

Amelia set the pear-shaped bottle on the table gently and stood straight. With a wince, she changed her mind and lowered her exhausted body into a chair with the gentleness of a curator lowering an artifact into a velvet case. "I'm not suggesting that," she finally said, her voice tight with the pain in her stomach. "But if she got sucked into the dreamscape while on the verge, in an in between place, is it possible that she'd have to go back in to get everything put right, bring both Reginas out?"

All eyes flew to Eva who grinned with the possibility. "If that is the case, splitting a personality is unprecedented in seer history."

"There is no fucking way that Regina went homicidal because Belle and I are in love and together again," Ruby dismissed the idea with an angry wave of her hand and squeezed Belle's hand tighter.

"You're kind of nauseating. Even Emma wants to slap you right now," Amelia provoked the wolf, mostly because she could, but partially because she spoke a truth no one else seemed willing to think about.

"Amelia, I do not want to slap Ruby." Emma crossed her arms, puffing her chest out in a bluffing stance that looked all wrong on the wolf's body. She bowed her head and pinched the bridge of her nose, resting her elbow on the other arm over her chest. "Okay, maybe a little," she admitted, "but that's not the point. Ruby's right. It's not enough to push Regina over the edge."

"What if Annabel did it?" Katy tossed out quietly, almost to herself.

"Excuse me?" Emma snapped, head jerking to attention.

"Annabel is a magical being, and magical beings can sense other magical beings, right? Have I got that right?" Emma nodded. "What if she tried to trap Regina's Dark Magic and accidentally shoved the two of you into a dreamscape? Regina used Light Magic to heal Belle. She has both, and she needs both to be Regina, but…" Katy glanced to Belle, looking for support or at least help to explain her theory.

"Eva!" A different accented voice called from the doorway. Everyone flinched at the sudden invasion. The fact that the echelon tone unmistakably identified Bethany did nothing to ease it. They hadn't viewed her as a threat in weeks, but the woman was exhaustive to deal with.

The younger French stopped outside the door hugging a huge, dusty tome to her chest and seemingly quite oblivious to the rest of the group. "I think I've found something useful. I may need Belle's help with the exact translation, but what I deciphered…"

The words tapered off as she finally absorbed her surroundings. Emma tipped her head towards Belle and forced a sad smile. What if Regina told the truth about Belle's mom? Those sisters were so screwed up. Hopefully, Bethany knew nothing about it. Bethany shoved the book into Eva's chest and stalked to Ruby's side, heels tapping smartly on the linoleum. Her unrestricted mousey brown hair swayed in the breeze she created, a proudly displayed flag of change as much as the lack of a blazer atop her gray pencil skirt and wrinkled blue-green blouse.

"Why has no one called me?" She demanded, but no one responded in the split second it took Bethany to raise one knee to the bed and lean over her sister, kneeling with her hands on either side of Belle's thighs. "What happened?" She asked more softly, directing her attention to Belle.

"A magical fight between Regina and me. I'm not sure exactly how I ended up here," Belle answered honestly.

"She's splitting between good Regina and The Evil Queen, isn't she?" Bethany asked, not even slightly surprised. Belle nodded with a furrowed brow and questioning eyes, and Bethany sat by her calves with her legs tucked primly beneath her.

"There was a feral child. King Furhan found him while out riding one morning. They were able to civilize him, but the boy remained mute throughout his life, suffering from long bouts of depression and violent outbursts. Furhan's seer guided the boy through a dreamscape, but when they came out, he returned to the feral child they'd found in the woods. He eventually returned to the forest never to be seen again." Bethany held one hand elegantly in her lap and touched Belle's knee with the other as she spoke. The soothing caresses of her thumb weren't lost on anyone, just how much had changed so quickly, how easily Bethany went from being suspected as Jacob's accomplice to a trusted and accepted member of the family. They should have called her and Granny. Emma added the guilt the growing pile of shitty emotions in her mind and returned her face to her hand, rubbing painfully at her eyes with a thumb and forefinger.

"How is that helpful?" Eva sniped. "It tells us nothing of how to merge two identities into one again."

Bethany smirked, batting her eyes superciliously at the irritable seer. "I wasn't merely reading an account. It's Furhan's seer's chronicle. That entire book tracks the boy from his discovery to the moment he gave up hope of seeing him again. It reads like an experiment, like this person expected to find the boy in that condition. I believe it to be a cruel human experiment conducted by this seer."

"What's her name?" Eva demanded, familiar with a list of seers gone bad.

"Unknown. She never claimed credit, at least not any detectable by me, but I'm quite inadequate in this language," Bethany sniffed haughtily, clearly uncomfortable and insecure with her short-coming.

"Is it in Furhan's native tongue or Amkharian Dialect?" Belle asked, finally presented with a task at which she excelled and enjoyed.

"It fluctuates from one to the other as though this seer grew up in the Amkhar Province, learning the vernacular, and then moved to Furhan's palace where she learned the proper tongue," Bethany explained, but no one understood a damn thing she meant except Belle.

Belle soaked up the confusion and sighed. "Amkharian Dialect resembles Cockney Rhyming Slang in this world, a language created in a specific region that is difficult to decipher if you aren't native to it. Mostly criminals inhabited the Province, so it's unusual for one to be well-versed in both." The tension relaxed as everyone caught up, and Belle reached for the massive book.

"I'm going to go check on Henry," Emma blurted suddenly and stalked from the room before anyone responded, red cape furling behind in her wake.

"Have I said something?" Bethany asked like a wounded puppy. Emma offered her the first chance to really explain herself of the entire group. Though she'd grown closer with Ruby and Belle, The Savior held a respected spot in her heart.

"It's not you, Bethany," Amelia supplied and hoisted herself painfully from the chair. She ruffled Katy's hair and smiled down at the girl, distracting her from the fact that a deranged psychopath stabbed her because Katy refused to give up any information on her equally deranged boyfriend. Between the playful behavior and the toddler snoozing her arms, Katy managed a softened expression if not a joyful one. At least it wasn't brimming with self-hatred and guilt.

"Amelia, sit down before I put _you_ in a dreamscape," Eva ordered. Amelia rolled her eyes, snagged her potion, and followed Emma.

No one stopped her, and she made a painstaking trek down the hall, passing the nurse's lounge where Henry watched television with Caleb and Lauren. She knew Emma better than that. She may have peaked in the window, but the emotionally stunted woman retreated to solitude when she felt vulnerable. She ran. Only Regina held the power to stop that. She found her on the floor of the vending machine cove near the entrance of the hospital, knees pulled to her chest and hands curled into tight fists at her side.

"How you doing, Marshall?" She asked softly and leaned against a cool soda machine.

"Belle's right. This is never going to end," Emma replied in a defeated, monotone, which sounded bizarre with her inflection and Ruby's voice.

"So, we just give up? I can cover every surface of the town with the boom potion we made for Zelena, get Ruby to set it, blow Regina up," Amelia suggested nonchalantly and smiled at the spark of defiance burning in Emma's eyes at the suggestion. "There's my girl."

"Fuck off, Shepherd," Emma flung with no small amount of vehemence.

"So, what's the plan?" Amelia asked, smiling at the blaze of Emma shining through, an Emma who knew enough of her life to feel the giant hole left by the absence of Regina's memories.

"I guess we have to wait for Belle to read that book," Emma conceded to the necessities of their circumstance.

Amelia swilled her potion, holding it up to the light to study the liquid. "Or we could go get Regina now," she tossed wryly at The Savior.

"I have no magic, and she kinda wants to fry my liver right now and eat it as a snack." Emma sighed deeply and stretched her legs out in front of her.

"Magic use and consumption does deplete iron," Amelia joked.

Her eyes twinkled at Emma, and the wolf's brow furrowed. "What the hell is in that bottle? You've been swishing it around all night."

Amelia held up a finger and focused on the potion, smile growing with each circle the liquid made. When it turned a bright green, teeth glinted in the fluorescent light. "This," she extended the bottle to Emma, "is the plan."

Emma stared up at her, expressionless. Amelia stamped her foot like a child and huffed another sigh. "This is a potion that will confine Regina in the magic bubble. It's been brewing since yesterday evening, just waiting on a blood source. I took the blood on Belle's clothes. It wasn't hers, so I just took a wild leap."

"What if it was Gizmo's blood?" Emma deadpanned as she accepted the bottle from Amelia's outstretched hand.

Amelia snickered, "Then I suppose you won't be attacked when you go back to the mansion. Don't drop that. Damn stuff takes over a day to make, so there won't be another batch ready until tomorrow night."

Amelia wished for the ability to sit on the floor next to the hurting savior. She hated being incapacitated, but the mild painkillers helped. Caleb, Eva, and Lauren tracked her consumption like little medi-hawks, and Eva even revoked the use of her ID badge to access any medicine carts, cabinets, and restricted areas of the hospital (like the pharmacy).

"You should be in bed, Amelia," Emma berated the potions master tenderly. The only reason Amelia inserted herself into this fight prematurely was at her behest. More guilt slipped onto Emma's shoulders. Their actions had consequences. When the hell would The Heroines of Storybrooke figure that out?

"Are you going to try and find Regina or let her come to you?" Amelia changed the subject. She knew her limits, she was reaching them very soon, but at least she admitted that.

"It doesn't matter. You do know she wants to rip my innards out and make a necklace, right?" Amelia held her side and laughed lightly. It felt good, hopeful, and Emma scraped a hand down her face, revealing a small smile when it dropped to her lap.

"When she attacked Belle, was her method purely magical or a combination of physical and magical?" Amelia asked suddenly.

"Both. Why?"

"Lots of mindfucking threats?" Emma nodded, her thoughts shifting to the probable reality that Belle's mother committed suicide after giving birth to Bethany. Amelia nodded, relieved. Relieved?

"This was how Regina behaved in her later years. She's not beyond redemption. She's tired. She may have the knowledge of our Regina, but she's still in the same place emotionally," Amelia explained, happy to actually be sharing her ideas and opinions with someone other than Caleb. Though they accepted her as one of their own, Ruby tiptoed around interactions and Eva still hated her for not revealing her incorrect suspicions about Caleb sooner. She hated everyone more than Lauren for Lauren's abduction.

"As in, she might cast a Dark Curse state of mind?" Emma perked with the notion while Amelia's eyes slipped shut, practically writing the curse words going through her mind on her face. "Whose heart would she use? She doesn't really love anyone right now, does she?"

"If Eva plucked her from a memory before I blew up her lab, me," Amelia informed her. Fear should have filled her, but an odd sort of excitement to see her mistress again replaced the cautionary emotion. While she never dreamed of compromising the retrieval of the Regina that belonged in this world with her family, Amelia never felt like she belonged anywhere except in Regina's castle mixing potions and fulfilling the woman's every need.

"Of course she does," Emma muttered. Regina loved everyone but her, the younger version of her, the her without memories. Hot, shallow breaths moved her chest as Emma accepted this pain atop everything else.

"Emma," Amelia breathed, recognizing her mistake immediately. Gods, how screwed up were Regina and Emma going to be when all of this ended?

"Any more theories on my memories? I don't know if it will help, but do you think True Love's kiss can fix this?" Emma blurted, throwing ideas out, bouncing them off the injured surgeon without fear of a room erupting in disagreement. Mostly, she just wanted to change the damn subject."

"Emma," Amelia said seriously, and Emma tipped her chin upwards, meeting the shining brown eyes of a woman she trusted implicitly. "I have to tell you something. No one else knows, and I really want to keep it that way, but you have a right to know."

"Well, don't be ominous about it," Emma tried to alleviate the sudden tension between them, but Amelia only crossed her arms protectively and bowed her head slightly. Dark brown hair fell into her face, adding to the self-comforting body language. "Amelia?"

Red spread around the surgeon's eyes. She swipe a hand through her hair, wiped the back under her nose. "I really should have told you when you came to me before. I'm so sorry, Emma," she breathed. Her heart hurt with the fear that this kept secret might have destroyed the beautifully open and honest relationship they'd created.

"It can't be that bad, Miss Kitty, just spit it out," Emma comforted her friend with her nickname and scrambled to her feet, taking the woman's trembling shoulders in her hands.

"I think Regina gave you the memory potion," she whispered, unable to meet Emma's eyes. Her head bowed further, and Ruby's height prevented Emma from finding them even while stooping lower.

"What? Where would Regina get a potion that powerf…" The dots connected almost immediately. Denial rose like a flesh-eating plague. "No, you… Amelia?"

Tears dripped onto Amelia's cheeks as she raised her chin but angled it to look over Emma's shoulder. "Regina came to me about a week before Belle came back. She wanted a potion to forget you."

Emma released her shoulders in disgust and turned her back, one hand on her hip and the other over her mouth. She took a minute to shackle the majority of her anger, but still it broke through. "What the hell is wrong with you?" She demanded in a dangerously low growl as she whirled on the neurosurgeon.

Amelia dropped her head again, jostling more tears onto her cheeks and crossed arms. "She was in a really bad place, Emma. You didn't see her. She's been slipping since before you lost your memories, and after everything that happened, she wanted to forget the woman she married so that she could love the woman you'd become. She deserved a chance to be happy." The brokenness temporarily stalled Emma's anger. She understood that Regina had hidden a lot of pain from her in the past few months, from all of them.

"When did she give it to me?" Emma demanded, crossing her arms, distancing herself from the other woman physically and emotionally.

Amelia shrugged and ran a hand through her hair once more, a few strands catching in a knot. "It was in my potion cabinet a week ago, but I've obviously been here for the past five days." Her head fell against the soda machine with a tiny thump, and she swallowed audibly, fighting the crushing guilt of keeping this knowledge from Emma for so long.

"Fine, so The Evil Queen gave me a memory potion," Emma vocalized what they both feared to be true.

"Emma, I'm so sor…"

"Just shut up!" Rage tore through Emma veins painfully, and she altered the course of her punch a millisecond before it landed against Amelia's jaw. The soda machine screeched on the floor, a few bottles flying loose and tumbling to the cubby at the bottom. Emma left her fist planted in the indentation Ruby's wolf strength created in the cold metal. Amelia held her breath, eyes wide and terrified.

"I'm tired of people apologizing to me," Emma whispered in the small space that separated their faces. "Find a way to fix it. I don't have time or energy to deal with this right now," she snapped, storming off before she even finished the thought and leaving Amelia to cry in the alcove alone. If Amelia had approached them about Regina's request, they might have stopped this, might have saved Regina from the pain of living her worst nightmare.

She blew out the front door and into the cool night, sucking deep breaths of crisp, cleansing air. Even with the cape, Ruby's lithe body and superior physicality cut through the night like a bullet. When she reached the paved walking path near the small river in the park, she finally stopped and rested her hands on her knees, elbows locked to support her weight. Heavy pants accompanied the sounds of the night, crickets and gently swishing water, but they originated in emotion, not physical exertion.

"Okay, Emma. It's okay, it's fixable," she pepped-talked herself, but even the words sounded lame to her ears. Who she'd been died, and she feared inevitably accepting that. When should they throw in the towel? Call it quits? End on a good note before disaster strikes again?

"Never," Emma answered the silent question aloud and touched her chest. She felt it still, the pull towards Regina, the mysterious and ever-present love they shared, even without her memories.

The air pressure around her shifted, a slight static raising the hair on the back of her neck. Slowly, her spine straightened and she reached for the strings tied at her throat. Shit, of course Regina waited until she isolated herself completely. She wasn't stupid, and without remorse to keep her actions in check, Emma justifiably feared for her life and Ruby's. If she died in Ruby's body, would Ruby die, too?

"Hello Darling," The Evil Queen purred.

Emma whirled slowly, dropping the cloak to the ground as she faced the sorceress. Her eyes pulled instantly to the burnt fabric sticking to Regina's chest and shoulder and the sweltering blister on the skin in the middle of the hole. Belle's final attack obviously struck its target, burned her. Even in the dullness of the waning moon, Emma saw the dark blood stains and marred flesh clearly.

"You're injured," Emma said stupidly.

Regina sneered. "Flesh wound."

The face of contempt contorted into an expression of anguish, and Regina shook her head before grabbing it with both hands, seemingly unfeeling of the pain in her shoulder. "No," she whispered in a breathy voice.

"Yes," she answered herself almost immediately, but the voice changed to a gravelly threat.

Fingers slipped into her hair, tugging at the roots lightly, and leaned forward as if trying to curl into a fetal position while standing. "You don't control me anymore!" Regina screamed at whatever voice echoed in her mind.

Emma breathed rapidly, everything else frozen. The entire scene would have terrified Rumpelstiltskin himself. Regina truly fought with her inner self morphed into an independent entity struggling for control of her wife's corporeal form.

"Stop it. Stop it. Shut up!" Regina shrieked, squatting to hide her face between her knees. "Stop it," she whispered. "I'm not her. I'm not her anymore. I'm not her anymore."

Emma took a step towards the tortured woman, stopped. Reached for her cell phone, decided against it. "Regina?" Emma breathed, unsure what exactly to do.

She realized her mistake the moment Regina's head whipped towards her in tandem with a blood-stained hand. An invisible force wrapped around her neck before she thought to move, and Regina slowly raised to her full height, clearly dominated by the evil within once more.

"R'gin," Emma choked out and clawed fruitlessly at the flesh of her neck, hurting only herself and not the spectral vice that squeezed the flow of air to a stop in her windpipe.

"Time to go to sleep, little wolf," The Evil Queen informed her of her fate in a voice that sounded beyond the mental breaking point, even for the deranged murderer unleashed in her wife's mind.

The vial of potion slipped from her numb fingers and shattered on the pavement beside the cloak. The melodic ringing of it filled her ears before Emma succumbed to the lack of oxygen entering her body. She only prayed Belle and Ruby's combined magic created a force strong enough to stop this disaster before her own children became orphans.


	18. Choices

Thank you for the reviews! Enjoy and try not to yell at me too much, I know what I'm doing.

Song: Human by Christina Perri

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><p>"Reading anything good?" Ruby asked as she sat on the sofa beside Katy in the nurse's lounge.<p>

Katy snapped her phone to the black screen and dropped it to her lap. "Not really," she replied. Her voice carried obvious frustration and pain, but Ruby watched the walls slam around her faster than Regina's. "Belle sleeping?" The subject change benefited both of them. They had no clue how to speak to each other anymore.

"No, I just got tired of hearing her speaking that weird ass language," Ruby laughed. How had anyone taken that language seriously? "How long they been out?" She nodded towards Henry and Lauren leaning against each other across the room.

"They were asleep when I came in here. Caleb went to find Amelia." Katy's phone dinged, indicating a message of some kind, and the severe tension returned to the girl's red cheeks. She always splotched up when her blood pressure rose, exercise or stress. She flipped the tiny button on the side to vibrate and leaned onto her hip to shove the device into her back pocket.

Ruby's brow furrowed and she pulled a deep breath to ask Katy what bothered her, but Katy reacted first. "We don't have to talk."

"Okay," Ruby deflated and leaned forward, resting elbows on her thighs. Her shoulders slumped forward, which felt awkward in Emma's body, hands dangling between her knees. "I'd never keep Alex from you," she blurted because unlike Katy and Regina and Belle, she hadn't the discipline to keep her mouth shut. She functioned on emotion, embraced them rather than shut them down, at least now that she'd learned that they fueled her wolf. They made her who she was.

"Ruby, just…" Katy started hotly, covered her face with both hands, and held her breath. Her chest and shoulders dropped with her hands, and she murmured, "Thank you."

"You're mad because I didn't tell you I was in Emma's body when you tried to talk to her the other day," Ruby theorized, finding a nice spot on the wall to stare at across the room rather than look at the girl she wanted so desperately to forgive.

"Haven't I been used enough?" Katy whispered in a deadened tone that hurt Ruby's big heart while simultaneously flaring her anger.

"Haven't you used us enough?" She shot back, but the jab lacked the angry luster she strove for. It just sounded tired.

Katy crossed her arms over her chest and slouched into the corner of the couch. The lack of response made Ruby feel guiltier than a heated response might have. Stomach knotted, she closed her eyes, jaws clenched. Belle called her on this childish behavior. She was the adult. Katy was an emotionally stunted child who stumbled into a bad situation. If someone like Ben focused on her in the couple of years after she'd left Granny's cottage with Snow, Ruby harbored no doubts that she'd have been vulnerable to the same kind of manipulation, despite already having killed multiple times. They shared more similarities than Ruby wanted to admit.

She sighed in frustration, more at herself than the teen. "I'm sorry," she said a little stronger than necessary. It sounded forced but not insincere.

"You have every right to be mad at me. I messed up, Ruby." The phone beneath her buzzed again, vibrating the couch slightly, and Katy tipped her head towards the ceiling, fighting back tears that wanted to fall. She cried all the time now. An emotional purge, as Belle might have called it.

"Popular tonight," Ruby stabbed at something light, but the band of tension squeezing them tightened a bit more when Katy's face dropped any hint of emotion. Her hazel eyes stifled the thoughts behind them, effectively cutting off all communication.

"Okay," Ruby sighed and pulled a hand through Emma's tangled hair. "You hungry?" Katy gave no physical or verbal indication that she'd even heard the question. Ruby chewed her lip. "I'm going to go grab a drink. I'll bring you something back, okay."

She stretched her arms and back as she stood, arching towards the ceiling. She needed to find Emma and ask her how long the effects of absorbing magic lasted. Her muscles seemed to shake more the longer she waited, and she felt like she'd just run a 100 mile marathon without stopping or sleeping for three days. Maybe food helped, couldn't have hurt. With a backward glance at the door to watch Katy take the phone out of her pocket, Ruby left the room.

Two steps down the hall, a wave of dizziness blurred her vision, and she pressed a hand into the wall for support. A thousand little needles prickled the inside of her skin in a surge of feverish heat. A few seconds later the episode passed, leaving her panting and weak. As much as she hated magic, respect for those who wielded it cemented into her brain. It tricked them and controlled them and haunted them. Belle suffered frequent migraines with the use of it. Migraines plagued Regina if she used too little. Emma absorbed the magic of others, transforming it into her own which left her weak and shaking, not to mention the mere thought of Regina naked probably sparked a healthy swell of it. How had they managed to make love without blowing something up?

Not for the first time, she wished for her wolf. Though magic hummed and swirled beneath the surface, she felt separate from it, possessed. Her wolf felt natural, comforting, and without it, Ruby felt the firm hold she'd finally grasped of her identity slipping ever so slightly. As much as she'd denied it until her recent lessons with Granny, the wolf defined a part of her, created a piece of her personality. Even her instincts needed altered in this body. Emma's less resilient flesh bruised and injured far more easily. When they'd faced The Evil Queen a few hours ago, it took every ounce of discipline in her to fight with magic instead of using her body as a shield for those she loved.

"Emma, are you okay?" Someone asked, and Ruby jerked from the internal monologue to find a nurse a couple feet away with a hand stretched towards her just in case she toppled over.

"What?" She asked stupidly.

"Are you okay?" The woman repeated.

"Yeah," she rasped, cleared her throat, and forced a little grin. "Yeah, just a dizzy spell," she elaborated, enough to make the woman leave but not enough to reveal the hidden identity behind Emma's bright green eyes.

Before the nurse engaged her further, Ruby pushed off the wall and began the long trek down the hall towards the vending machines on quivering legs. Her heart skipped a beat when Snow, David, and Granny appeared at the end of the hallway, and before she thought too much about it, she sprinted towards them. The old woman grunted when she flung Emma's arms around her neck. Tears burned her eyes, so she squeezed them shut tightly and breathed in the comforting aroma of Granny's lemon-scented shampoo and diner grease. The scent of her young adulthood, of her life, the only scent that took her back to a five-year-old child on the older woman's lap.

"You've done lost your damn mind," Granny snapped, and Ruby laughed as she pulled back and wiped tears.

"Maybe," she agreed. She glanced first at David and then Snow. "Mind if I have a minute with Granny?"

"Is everything okay? Did Belle get worse?" Snow asked in the soft tone that Ruby used to love so very much, the voice that carried her through one of the darkest periods of her life.

"Snow," she cried and flung her arms around her former friend's neck. She'd not forgotten how close they'd been, how much they shared, but Snow's inability to forgive Regina tore them apart. Ruby's inability to forgive Snow ripped apart their friendship, and now that same ugly flaw threatened to shred her family apart. "I'm so sorry I've been such a terrible friend to you," she apologized and pulled back to hold Snow's shoulders.

"Emma, what's wrong?" Snow repeated, pulse rising with the oddness of the behavior.

"Nothing. Belle and the jellybeans are fine. I think we're mostly still here because all the kids are asleep," she reassured everyone before they panicked over her babies.

Granny broke the moment with a sharp smack on the back of her head. "When the hell were you going to tell us?"

Ruby laughed and hugged Granny again. This time the elder Lucas hugged her back, entrapping her safely in those stout arms that had always been there to catch her. A few tears escaped onto the scratchy wool sweater Granny wore, and Ruby buried her face in the damp spot, releasing more. A familiar, leathery hand rubbed a comforting circle over her shoulder blades.

"Go on. She's fine," Granny barked at the Charmings. When they moved out of earshot, Granny pushed her back gently but held her shoulders, not letting go. "How long?"

"Since the day Belle came back. Annabel did a weird dreamscape thing on Emma and Regina, and we got switched. And Regina is bouncing back and forth between Regina and The Evil Queen. And Belle blacked out from wolf's rage, except it presents as magic and it doesn't have to be the full moon to activate it. And… Katy." Ruby's voice cracked and she gasped for air, but Granny pulled her into another hug before she continued.

"It's alright, girl," Granny murmured into her hair. "Katy's tough as us Lucas women. She's going to pull through."

Ruby shook her head and pulled back. "I don't know how to forgive her, Granny. How am I supposed to be a good mother if I can't forgive my kids for everything, to love them unconditionally?" She sobered at the words as surprised as Granny with the emotional admission. Granny opened her mouth, closed it, and squeezed her shoulder when no sage wisdom came to mind.

"Did you forgive my mother?" She asked, casting a wary eye about for eavesdroppers.

Granny wiped her hot, wet face with hands far gentler than she'd ever remembered. "I try a little every day," she answered honestly.

"I put you through hell growing up. I still do. Do you forgive me?" Ruby pleaded rather than questioned, taking her grandmother's hands up in desperation. "I know you were just protecting me by keeping me so close. You didn't want the same life for me as Anita. I know that now, but I've still done horrible things, to you, to Belle." She needn't have elaborated; they both knew she referenced the day she tried to rape her. "I make it almost impossible to love me."

"Ruby Elizabeth Lucas," she berated with just the use of her name. She tucked hair behind her ears and held the sides of her head tenderly but firmly. "You are the best thing I've done with my life. You make it impossible not to love you. You understand?" Ruby shook her head, and Granny sighed, her face softening into an expression of endeared exasperation.

"You always make it right." She chuckled. "You're a disaster, but you're an honorable, beautiful disaster. Understand?" She repeated the question. Ruby nodded.

"You don't have to forgive her right away, I know I won't, but give her a chance to make it right," Granny advised, sharing the wisdom she'd always wanted to share with the still-young wolf. It felt nice to still be needed, especially since Ruby had grown up so much in the past few months without Belle and straightened out her priorities.

Ruby nodded and hugged her again. They stood together in silence, simply soaking in the warmth of the other. "How did you know it was me?" She asked, pulling back.

Granny grinned. "Been around a few years. When you and Emma Swan are involved, everything that might go wrong, will go wrong," she replied slyly, but Ruby pursed her lips and crossed her arms, silently calling her grandmother on her bullshit. "Not to mention, the day she worked in the diner, I recognized her handwriting. All the tickets were abbreviated incorrectly, and she set me straight about the way I've been treating you in a way only one of the three of them might."

Ruby's eyes widened. "Emma told you off?"

Granny shrugged. "Might have mentioned something about you needing recovery time after being abducted and tortured." She rapped her knuckles on Ruby's chest. "You follow your heart. If it's not in the diner right now, I've still got a few years left in this bag of bones."

"Mhm," Ruby hummed. "I think someone's a new woman now that Marco is coming over for dinner every night."

Granny tapped the side of her head again. "You mind your business."

"You really shouldn't hit an amnesiac on the head," Ruby jabbed again, and Granny rolled her eyes.

"Bring me a pack of crackers if you're going to the vending machines," she instructed and brushed passed her nosy granddaughter. Ruby smiled after her. "Gotta keep my strength up."

It took a second, but the double entendre reached Ruby's dirty mind quick enough. "Oh, ewww," she called after her, but Granny never turned around.

"She's pretty much like I remember her," a rumbling, male voice stated a few feet behind her. Ruby turned slowly and smiled at Jack, wondering how much of the conversation he'd heard while he obviously waited around the corner.

The good mood created by Granny's unconditional love faltered when Jack held up her red cloak. "I found this in the park and followed her scent back to the hospital. I think Emma's in trouble," he said without knowing the full situation.

Ruby touched the cloak reverently and then grasped the familiar fabric in her hand. She should have been with Emma. "You have no idea."

Without elaborating, she sprinted back to the triage room where she'd left Belle. Jack followed, respectfully trailing behind even though his wolf surpassed Emma's speed on a bad day. They blew past Granny who joined the dash, seeing the blazing flag of trouble in Ruby's hands. She rounded the corner and stumbled into Belle's bed with the grace of a newborn bird in Emma's clumsy body.

"Problem," she shouted, though everyone in the room already tensed at the sight of the red cape. Emma hadn't taken it off since her stint as a quadruped.

Belle, back in her leather pants and boots, slowly closed the book in her lap and slid out of the bed. "Ruby, we can't help Regina."

"What?" She glanced around the room. "Do you not see this? She has Emma," she yelled at them, an hysterical edge slipping into her voice. She waved the cloak at the people who practically kept this town from being destroyed with little outside help. If they were helpless, no one else stood a chance of survival or victory.

"Sweetheart," Belle eased into the explanation and covered Ruby's hands clenching the security hood. "Furhan's seer theorized that the split of personality occurred because there were two opposing forces within one being. Regina only just discovered that she could use Light Magic the night Annabel cause this debacle."

Ruby looked around again. Snow and David carried severely confused expressions, and she rolled her eyes. Why had they bothered to even attempt hiding their body swap? Everyone else either held their breaths or retreated into themselves, unable to cope with the reality of possibly losing one or both of the missing women.

"So, she has to choose between her lightness and darkness?" Ruby clarified, struggling for calm. Belle nodded. "But she's not Regina without both."

"That's what she meant," Belle connected the dots. All eyes turned to her in anticipation, and she bowed to their wishes with an explanation, "Before Regina changed tonight, she said that The Evil Queen was going to kill Emma and take her light. I thought at the time she referred to Emma as her light, but this makes much more sense."

Ruby flapped her arms helplessly, unsure who to speak to first. "But she's not Regina without both," she repeated, hands falling to her side. The red cape dangled from her fingertips like Ruby had gone numb.

"Let's hope her light side is stronger," Eva mumbled from her vantage point near the door, her usual spot. She leaned against the wall, arms crossed, expression forlorn and distant.

"Eva, why can't you fix her?" Ruby asked, barely resisting the urge to grab the surgeon by her scrub top and slam her into the wall.

Eva sighed and rubbed her fingers over the scars along the left side of her neck. "To take Regina into a dreamscape while this is happening would only create two separate entities on the inside where only one could be present in the physical form. The only probably solution I see is to guide her through a dreamscape that helps her accept both sides of herself, but I cannot guarantee it would work, not to mention…" She swung a hand towards the cloak by rotating her elbow and then let it drop to her side.

"That's why she gave Emma the Zambcurk Root potion," Amelia said from the doorway. Red surrounded her swollen eyes and spread over her cheeks. Caleb held her shoulders supportively but looked almost as angry as the flare that circled the room with the knowledge.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Snow interjected, the most clueless of them all. "Ruby is in Emma's body?" Nods all around. "What is Zambcurk Root?"

"It's the potion you took that erased David from your memories," Amelia supplied. "You really should know what you're drinking before you stick it in your mouth."

"Excuse me?" Snow squawked indignantly.

"Enough!" Granny commanded. "I want to hear the rest of Dr. Shepherd's explanation." The tightness in her face spoke more loudly than her words the amount of anguish she felt at the thought of losing Regina again.

Amelia wiped tears away, glanced over her shoulder at Caleb who nodded encouragingly. "I made Regina the potion. She asked me to about a week before Belle came home. She wanted to forget Emma because she couldn't move on from Emma's accident." Without conscious thought, Amelia turned scornful eyes onto Belle who had the decency to wrap her hands around her stomach and bow her head with guilt.

"Can it be reversed? The potion I took was broken," Snow offered helpfully.

Amelia chuckled harshly. "Anything Rumpelstiltskin gave you was half strength at best. He wants his potions to wear off to keep the customers returning. I worked for The Queen, which meant everything needed to work permanently. I can reverse most things by neutralizing the active ingredients with other herbs or the blood of certain animals, but I don't have access to anything in our world. I don't even know what I need." She shrugged dejectedly and leaned into Caleb.

"But why give it to Emma? She already struggled with her memories," Belle pondered aloud, not really expecting an explanation. Just another question that led to more questions than answers.

"I don't know, but without Emma, Regina's light side is obviously slipping," Amelia replied dolefully.

"So, it basically has to run its course like mine?" Snow asked. Amelia nodded against her boyfriend's chest.

"How the hell could you do this?" Ruby seethed, inconsolable. "I knew you had questionable morals, but I didn't think you'd be stupid enough to create such a dangerous potion right after someone stole all of your potions to try and kill us a few days ago, especially when Regina asked you. You should have come to us!" Ruby shouted, and Belle held her arm when she surged forward slightly.

"Oh come off it, you self-righteous, self-centered bitch. I saw what you didn't, and Regina came to me for help because none of you gave two shits about what was happening to her." Amelia threw both hands in the air, adrenaline and anger endorphins covering the pain in her side.

"And what is it you think you saw that I couldn't?" Ruby spat venomously, taking a menacing step towards the potions master. She understood that decking Amelia in her current physical state fell into the realm of off-limits, but Ruby reached her limit of secrets and lies and bullshit from everyone in their group.

Amelia held her ground and looked up into Ruby's eyes without hesitation. "I saw how broken she was," she said softly. It wasn't accusatory or angry or egotistical. It simply was, and the crushing honesty behind the statement left Ruby speechless and guilty. Amelia stepped away from the flabbergasted woman and hobbled two steps towards the door.

"Where are you going?" Belle asked, not quite sure how to proceed now that Ruby seemed floored and ashamed of her actions.

"I'm going to go make a damn tracking potion to find Emma if she's still alive. You can come or stay up here and look at your fucking useless books," Amelia tossed over her shoulder.

She glanced at Ruby to confirm, and her partner swung the red cape over her shoulders and nodded. "Let's go find Emma," Belle replied.


	19. Twisted Angel

So, this is about as dark as I'm going with this one. I did promise you a lighter story, after all. Not to mention, it's difficult to be dark and horrible when someone inspires that little flutter of your heart every day by believing in you.

Thanks for the reviews, Friends. (Anonguest, I love long reviews! So ramble away until your heart is content.)

Enjoy.

Song: Tears of an Angel by Amy Guess (beautiful cover)

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><p>"Fools," Regina muttered.<p>

Emma, in a confused haze, thought for a moment that she might have spoken to her, but the lower rumble of a continued conversation in two distinctly different pitches told her that Regina still spoke to herself, like Gollum. The scene of the cave-dwelling creature screaming at himself lost all of its hilarity. Regina argued with herself, with a voice in her head. Her own voice.

"They won't stop looking for her. You may as well give up," Regina mocked, her Regina. Her beautifully broken, wonderfully tragic Regina. A strangled sound of pain followed the bold statement, and a deeper, scratchier voice followed.

"If you won't let me kill her, perhaps the wolf will be an appropriate substitute. You nearly gave your heart to her, did you not?" The Evil Queen answered the taunt with a threat. Of course, she had. A harsh laugh followed a few seconds later, perhaps a condescending response to something whispered in her mind.

Emma cracked her eyes one at time to find Regina pacing near a stream in what appeared to be a cave of some sort. A few fire balls hovered near the ceiling, illuminating the black and white sand. A sickly sweet scent filled her nostrils, like the sweetness of rotten apples but less comforting and pleasant. Cold iron shackled her wrists to the wall but gave a long enough lead to rest comfortably on the soft if chilly sand. She stayed perfectly still except her eyes; they followed Regina's frantic pacing. Finally, she stopped and crossed her arms over her chest with a laugh.

"Do you honestly think Ruby Lucas swayed my heart after feeling the love of The Truest Believer and Savior of our people? My libido, perhaps," Regina conceded. One thin eyebrow rose and fell quickly, emphasizing her point with the expression. Emma had seen it a thousand times when Regina felt particularly frisky, in a playful way though. The admission surprised Emma; Regina never actually spoke the words aloud, probably for her benefit, though they'd always known it to be a reality. Why lie to herself though, right?

"I'll satisfy that soon enough," The Evil Queen answered. A few seconds later she grabbed her temples and yelled, the anguish echoing sickeningly off the damp cave walls. "Stop," she commanded.

"They'll never love you," Regina taunted coldly, overpowering her darker counterpart once more. "You cast the curse to stop fighting. If you harm Emma, you will never know peace." She smiled, dark and malicious. Emma had seen that smile on Mayor Mills dozens of times her first few weeks in Storybrooke. Regina fought dirty, and a swell of relief deflated her chest. Regina fought for her, even locked in some type of mystical stronghold, Regina fought for her.

"She deserves it," The Evil Queen snapped. "You'll never tell her what she's done. You'll never tell her how much she hurt you when she killed Zelena, the only blood kin left of our line. Everyone wanted her dead, just as they wanted me dead for so many years." Regina ran a hand over her stomach, stopping when her thumb pushed between her breasts. Her eyes fluttered and closed, like perhaps she listened to something Emma failed to hear. Every gesture of The Evil Queen carried a sexual undertow.

She grinned roguishly and turned her head slightly over her shoulder, bowed just enough to drop strands of disheveled hair onto her other cheek. "Well, I suppose I crossed that off your list of secrets."

"Emma," Regina whispered, suddenly present once more. The broken woman whipped her head towards The Savior, a beautifully tragic grief in those dark eyes. Slowly, the expression fell into a wicked smirk of the second entity within the same mind.

A shot of adrenaline knotted Emma's stomach, and she swallowed the excess saliva suddenly in her mouth. Regina never mentioned Zelena, not even when Emma settled down enough to help plan their wedding. They'd actually never spoken about the entire incident – switching hearts, interring Zelena's body to the Mills family mausoleum. Regina caused the smallest fuss possible. She'd not even honored her with a service, not even a private one for the family. She'd just buried her out of what felt like obligation and moved on to something happier, like their wedding and their daughter.

Regina shook her head, the vicious expression falling away once more. "It isn't necessary to dredge things that do not matter." It sounded convincing, but Emma felt the lie. She'd lied for months, pretending not to care, to mourn, the loss of someone who might have been saved if given a proper chance. No wonder Regina went through a crisis of faith and identity the past few months, especially with her memories erased and Belle's disappearance and Ruby's utter brokenness. She'd believed herself the target of Jacob's anger, her past misdeeds endangering her family yet again.

Emma tried to speak, but nothing rolled over her tongue. She closed her mouth. What could she have said that might have made a shred of difference in Regina's aching heart? Nothing. Regina simply slipped into the background in order to become the best person possible so they'd not turn on her, too. Even Ruby (who carried the darkness of her wolf) doubted Emma while she'd carried Regina's heart, jumping almost immediately to confinement and then execution rather than attempting to understand how two opposing forces might coincide in one person equally. Suddenly, confessing to The Council that she'd accidentally brought them back to this world and relinquishing her titles without a fight made perfect sense.

That's why she'd gone to Amelia, Emma realized.

Amelia Shepherd withheld judgment of The Evil Queen in The Enchanted Forest. She'd loved Regina then and she loved her now, though they'd grown apart, perhaps irreparably, but the loyalty remained, the easy acceptance of the faults of others because she had so many faults in herself. Everyone else obsessed over the progress Regina made, but no one acknowledged where she'd come from, who she'd been. Amelia never forgot because she'd lost a friend when The Evil Queen cast the curse, not a tormentor. It's what made Amelia different from them, why she couldn't quite fit no matter how much they loved her and considered her one of their own – or in Ruby's case, barely tolerated the mere mention of her name. They owed Regina and Amelia an apology.

Regina feared that they'd all turn on her if she embraced her violent tendencies and shut them off, becoming passive, settling for a shadow of herself for their benefit. Emma blinked rapidly, chasing away the tears of their error, their arrogance and narrow-mindedness.

The Evil Queen watched the mental cogs slip and grind in Emma's brain for a grip of understanding of the situation, and another sickening smile spread slowly as her eyes closed. "You could heal us," she suggested sweetly. "I'll give you five minutes with your wife."

"Only if you let me out first," Regina bargained and opened her eyes, as surprised as Emma that she now stood in physical form. She touched her face with one hand, turning towards Emma.

"Regina?" Emma whispered. This possibly ranked as the weirdest and most terrifying situation they'd ever faced. As scared as Emma felt, her heart compelled her more strongly than ever before to save this fragmented woman before her.

"Darling." Regina strode towards her, heels sinking in the sand awkwardly, and Emma sat up to meet her as she fell to her knees. "Emma, I can't control her," Regina cried, tears dripping onto her cheeks.

"I know." She tucked dark hair behind her ears and cupped her cheeks. Shackles rattled as she wiped at the wetness on her cheeks with tender strokes of her thumbs.

"Belle? The children?" She gushed, taking Emma's hands in her own. Fear looked wrong on the striking features, and Emma wondered how many times she'd actually seen it there. If it looked this abnormal without her memories, how scared should she actually have been?

"Everyone is fine. Belle tapped into some sort of Wolf's rage and blacked out. She just needed to sleep it off, like a wolf who hasn't learned control during wolf's time," Emma explained. Relief spread on Regina's features, and she bowed her head, shoulders stooping with the knowledge.

"Emma, when you get out of this, please tell her that I'm sorry for what was said about her mother," Regina begged. Remorse of the Regina she loved slowly eclipsed her features, and Emma tightened her grip on Regina's hands.

"No, you tell her yourself, Regina. I'm not going to just let you slip away," Emma declared in true savior fashion. Regina smiled sadly around a wet sigh and cupped her cheek, brushing a thumb over Emma's high cheekbone.

"I won't stop fighting, Emma. I won't leave you or my kids that easily," Regina vowed softly. "But, you must be prepared to do what is necessary if I'm not strong enough. Understand, Darling?" Emma nodded. She understood that Regina asked for her own murder rather than put her family at risk.

"Regina, I'm sorry. About Zelena. I'm sorry we never talked about her. I didn't…" Regina waved a hand and cut her off, more tears spilling onto her cheeks. Emma leaned forward and cupped the back of Regina's neck to bring their foreheads together. They sniffled quietly for a moment.

"When you find a way to free yourself, don't look back. She'll kill you if I let her," she whispered sweetly in a way only a lover could.

Regina smiled sadly and pulled back to brushed away the fresh tears on Emma's face, a thousand words to say but none that fell over her tongue. A stabbing pain attacked her shoulder, and she winced, leaning into Emma for support.

"Regina, this is really bad. It's going to get infected if it isn't cleaned." Emma ran her fingers over the burned shirt still sticking to the flesh of Regina's chest, melted by the new magic Belle wielded. Regina lifted the uninjured shoulder and smiled as if to say 'Good.' "Is Belle strong enough to take her down?" Emma asked, following her thoughts easily.

The older woman shook her head. "I don't know. It's possible if the pups carry the same amount of wolf magic as Ruby."

"Regina, what do I do?" Emma asked.

"Belle and Ruby are helping Amelia make a tracking potion. They're coming for you, but they won't find you. She's using the river as a looking glass to watch their movements. She's protected this cave, so you need to find a way out. They've almost figured out that you're…" Regina grabbed her head and leaned forward.

"That I'm what, Regina?" Emma ducked, trying to see Regina's face behind the veil of hair and arms that covered it.

"You're… Savior," Regina forced between clenched teeth.

Emma grabbed her shoulders and shook the woman roughly. "Stop it. You said five minutes and it's barely been two. Let her go."

"Oh," Regina clicked her tongue, pursing her lips in mock sympathy. "Dreadful how time passes when you're trapped in a memory."

"Give her back to us," Emma pleaded, even knowing this woman wasn't to be reasoned with in a psychotic break.

"What is it about her that you cannot find in me?" Regina grabbed her face with one hand fingers pressing crescents into one cheek, a hard thumb on the other. Dark eyes flicked back and forth, searching hers for something Emma couldn't have identified. After an extended moment of silence, Regina pushed her backwards into the wall, and Emma stayed there to figure out exactly what just happened.

This woman fulfilled every expectation Emma had of The Evil Queen, but she behaved so differently than anticipated. Much less angry than broken and pathetic, Amelia anticipated her personality perfectly. Emma felt much more sympathy than expected as she jerked a hand over the small stream and sneered at the image in the water. "Oh look, Scooby and the bumbling band of fools have arrived," she said with a lethal softness that sent a shiver down Emma's spine.

"Leave them alone." Emma yanked the chains holding her in place, but even with Ruby's strength, she failed to move them from the wall. Maybe The Evil Queen enchanted them.

"How quickly do you think the wolf would lose her mind should her princess fall under my power again?" The Evil Queen wondered aloud, but the words tumbled form her lips so quietly that Emma actually thought she spoke more to herself than taunted her prisoner.

"Regina, please don't hurt them," Emma pleaded just as softly, recusing accusation and anger from the words. Amelia called it correctly. This Regina seemed tired, on the verge of a change or suicide. "Please."

"Why should I grant mercy when none would be shown to me? Snow's bitch decimated half of my army," Regina spat odiously. "She'd have made a magnificent trophy." She ran a hand over her stomach again, obviously recreating scenarios from decades past in her mind.

Emma shivered and pressed herself into the wall, nauseous with the mere thought of what punishments she'd have inflicted if Ruby had been captured. If Regina wanted Ruby's body, she could have taken her without thought. Though she felt the supernatural strength and anger of the wolf in her blood, Ruby practiced for years to learn enough control to harness them properly and still struggled with it at times. Air caught in her chest when Regina stretched her chin over her marred shoulder and caught her eyes.

"Do I frighten you?"

Emma opened her mouth, closed it, shook her head, not trusting her voice to belie the fear they both knew lurked in her heart. Regina returned the distant gaze towards the vast expanse of blackness beyond the influence of the small fireballs floating near the ceiling that provide their light. "Yes," she finally croaked.

Regina exhaled a short burst of air loudly in the silence of the cave. "I should."

Emma's stomach knotted tightly again. "Regina, don't do this."

"The daughter of Snow White in the body of her best friend," an unrecognizable voice commented appreciatively, spinning across the soft sand and gusting over her body.

Emma closed her eyes, blocking the inhuman expression on the other woman's face. Part of her wanted to believe that Regina simply scared her to keep her docile and quiet, but the more realistic side prepared her for the hand that slid around her throat, the magic the paralyzed her body… but not for the laughter. The deliberately high-pitched, condescendingly tone that slithered over her eardrums and slowly penetrated her heart with a shard of frozen limpid stone. If Regina felt anything other than solace in the savage treatment of her body, she gave no indication, not micro expression of doubt, Emma wished for the ability cover her ears more than the desire to break free of the powerful magic holding her body prisoner.

"Regina, please," she begged. "Please don't destroy us." The words slipped out before she thought about them, and they resulted in a sharp sting on her cheek. The red handprint burned in the coolness of the cave. Emma's eyes slammed shut once more, unable to watch those deadened eyes devour Ruby's battered body.

"There is no us." Regina emphasized the words a magical knife on her shirt. The ripping fabric echoed repugnantly against the wet walls of the cave, but nothing followed, no bruising touch on her breasts or nails over her stomach. No brutal caress squeezed bile up her throat, just a chilling draft of clammy cave air that inspired goose bumps over the expanse of her chest and stomach.

Emma opened her eyes, and over her heaving chest, found something she'd not expected. Guilt. Perhaps even a reverence. Regina stared at the large patches of mismatched scars marking Ruby's skin. Lightly, the pad of her finger traced a jagged line across her stomach, eyes riveted to the bumpy white flesh.

"She did it for you, Regina," Emma whispered, voice quivering shamelessly.

It was the truth, and not even The Evil Queen denied the fact that Ruby allowed herself to become a human target in Neverland in order to rescue Emma, the only thing that saved Regina from the darkness that so often threatened The Lost Soul of the prophecy. She gingerly touched the neatly stitched tread of the Frankenstein-like scar left behind from Cora's torture. Her chest moved rapidly with shallow breaths that belied the emotions her eyes concealed.

Without preamble, Regina stood and stalked towards the darkness of the cave.


	20. Disenfranchised

This one went way longer than I expected, but I love it. If I don't get another update posted in the next couple of days, have no fears, I seem to have overextended or overworked my wrist at the gym yesterday. Don't want to work myself into an injury, so it might take me a little longer to post.

Til then, thank you for the reviews and new follows and enjoy!

Songs: Only a Memory by Icon for Hire, Carry on my Wayward Son by Rachel Rachel (this version just felt more right because it's all women. *shrugs*)

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><p>Ruby sighed and glared at her cell phone staring innocently up at her from the breakfast table in the kitchen. Weary, she rubbed her burning eyes, holding a thumb and forefinger atop them and sighed heavily once more. Emma's body struggled to maintain a normal function with the lack of sleep, but she'd traipsed through the woods a few nights prior and felt completely fine. Emma carefully maintained her physique, providing a hard-earned endurance that came almost naturally to Ruby's wolf, but not that night. Every muscle shook and quivered with the effort of simply sitting upright. She gulped another huge swallow of coffee and glanced down at the playpen where Annabel crawled about, stopping every couple of inches to stick something into her mouth. The infant stared up at Ruby with those bright green eyes that matched her own at the moment. She sat on her butt roughly and reached her tiny arms towards Ruby.<p>

"Mamamamamamamama." She said, followed by a string of indiscernible sounds and guttural noises. Drool dripped from her chin, something only adorable on babies.

"Yeah, that's exactly what you said before you stuck Emma and Regina into a dreamscape. No way I'm picking you up right now, little one," Ruby sassed the infant who had no clue what she said but apparently loved her soft tone.

"Mamamamamama," she babbled again.

"I know, okay," she argued back with the babe. "I should just butch up and call him, right?" She glanced at the phone and then back at the child as though she might have answered. When Amelia's tracking potion failed the previous night, they all agreed that they'd call Jack for help. That responsibility fell onto her shoulders.

Annabel clapped her hands and babbled at her excitedly. Ruby's smile spread slowly, her heart melting for the little girl. In seven months, she'd have infants of her own. The smile faded slowly as she remembered the late night feedings, the lack of sleep, and the constant delirium of that first month they had Annabel home from the hospital. Sure, Emma and Regina possessed the wrong hearts, but no one had the right to be that grouchy at five in the morning. Heat flushed her slightly heaving chest, eyes wide but no longer seeing.

"Sweetheart?" Belle said next to her ear, and Ruby jumped, glaring up at her lover.

She hunched over her phone again and mumbled, "You shouldn't sneak up on me. I don't have my wolf hearing anymore."

"I said your name three times from the door to here. Now, please drop your attitude and tell me why Annabel gave you a panic attack," Belle smacked her down verbally and wrapped her hands around her expanding hips. Neither of them slept the previous night, and irrational anger swelled in Ruby's heart and spilled onto her tongue.

She whipped back towards Belle, intend on telling her lover to leave her alone. The moment she connected with those compassionate and empathetic blue eyes, the ire melted away and she dropped her eyes to the fists clenched in her lap.

"What if I'm not a good mom to them? They're wolves, and they're going to depend on me to teach them how to be one. As much as you love them, you can't do that. That's on me, and I want it, but..." Ruby trailed off when Belle touched her hair and took a step into her personal space.

"Look at me, Ruby," she bade gently and waited until Ruby complied. "I understand what it feels like to love a wolf. When they don't understand why someone hates them for how they were born, I'll be there to explain everything. Our children will not be a burden." A slither of anger spiked Ruby in the heart, and she turned on her chair and squeezed Belle's hips lightly.

"Your hormones must have you off this morning," she poked fun. "That's not what I was thinking," she elaborated quickly when a flash of irritation flickered in Belle's eyes. "What if something happens to me? Or you or both of us?"

Belle smiled sadly and pulled Ruby into her chest, pressing her lips to the top of her head. "We'll bring them home," she promised. "They stayed in Neverland to save you, and I refuse to accept this as the end. This is just another test, Ruby Lucas. Now stop feeling sorry for yourself and worrying about things that haven't happened yet and call Jack. I have a house full of children who require breakfast."

With that, Belle whirled out of the embrace and flounced towards the pantry. She took two steps in, turned on the heel of her boot, and retreated towards the foyer. "There's cinnamon in there," she choked around her hand and then disappeared, probably to the bathroom.

Ruby chuckled lightly and picked up her phone to stare at it. Snow and Katy appeared a moment later. Snow offered to feed them since Belle incapacitated herself, and Katy jumped at the offer of helping. Ruby studied the two, especially Katy. She was shy and unsure, asking needless questions to gain Snow's guidance. She offered tiny, bashful smiles to the woman and ducked her head to hide them under the guise of concentrating on her assigned tasks. She soaked up the maternal attention in a way that might have been expected by a child Alex's age, not a teenager. Who better to help her than someone well-versed in the betrayal of the _heroines_?

Ruby ground her teeth at the ridiculous title. Most of what they'd done was required to stay alive and for each other, not for the general populace or some selfless heroic complex… well, except maybe Emma and Belle. Those two just kept giving. Growling under her breath, she jabbed at the phone until Jack's name appeared. She loathed asking the man for more help. He hadn't earned a spot in their inner circle yet, even if he offered to help and hadn't attempted to hurt any of them yet. She trusted him about as far as Emma's body could throw him, but they hit a wall and a wolf's nose looked like a pretty good solution to scaling it. They'd been so sure that Amelia's potion worked, but when Emma's shirt dropped to the ground in the middle of the woods without a shred of evidence to support Emma's location, they scoured the area in vain and then traipsed home in time for coffee and breakfast.

"Katy," Ruby called softly, and the girl looked up from the bowl of batter she dutifully stirred. A puff of flour had brushed her cheek, leaving behind a white spot, and Ruby smiled. "When you're finished, could you find the cinnamon in the pantry?"

Katy glanced towards the pantry and then back to Ruby, confused that Ruby trusted her with something, even something as insignificant as finding the source of cinnamon that Regina missed. "Sure," she clipped, already defensive but willing.

Ruby's brow furrowed as the girl turned back to the batter. Where was the attitude, the anger? Alex destroyed her concentration with a squeal of delight, followed by the pattering of her tiny feet across the foyer. Ruby smiled, knowing exactly what she was about to announce, and her heart soared.

"Kay, Toothless can fly!" She yelled and leapt upon the teenager. "H'cup put a wing on his tail and he's not broken anymore!" She loathed the idea of the television babysitting her child, but nothing consoled her when she woke up in the hospital room without Emma in her body. It only added to her anxiety to come home alive. How they hell had Regina and Emma functioned so long with children? How much of a sacrifice had they been willing to make by remaining in Neverland to save her? The though just now struck her like a hammer in the chest, and she wondered if she could have made the same decision with Alex waiting for her at home.

Katy swooped the girl up to straddle her shoulder and left her to hold onto her head, distracting Ruby from the darker thoughts. "I think I'll get a dragon," Katy said pensively, playing along with the little girl's fantasies as she gave the batter a final stir and handed it to Snow.

"Will it die on the road?" Alex asked, shocking everyone.

"What do you mean?" Katy asked, confused as the two adults.

"At Temma and Adgie's party, you said the dragon died on the road," Alex explained and tangled her tiny fingers in Katy's hair. Clearly, Alex remembered the awful story about Bartleby the two-headed dragon dying at the fork in the road due to indecision, even if they hadn't.

Before anyone could answer, she continued, "Is that where Wolf went?"

Ruby jerked to her feet, but Katy pulled the tiny body from her shoulder and hugged her tightly. "No, Baby, Wolf just had to go do something with Regina. They'll be back before you know it."

"Mommy and Daddy died," Alex blurted without thought to social propriety as children often did. She played with the wooden pendant resting on Katy's neck, crestfallen and quiet.

"Hey," Katy caught her attention with the peppy-sounding word. "Want to go play in the backyard?"

"Do I have to wear shoes?" The toddler slipped in the request at a mischievously vulnerable moment, and Katy glanced over her shoulder to Ruby, not chancing disobeying Ruby's wishes in any aspect. The wolf shook her head, knowing how happy going without shoes made the little girl.

Katy shook her head in kind. "Nope." She hoisted the three-year-old higher and carried her from the kitchen, leaving the patio door open behind them.

Ruby waited about a minute and followed when no sounds of gleeful squealing followed. Snow almost stopped her but kept her mouth shut when a dark glare pointed in her direction. Ruby stepped onto the patio and halted, cold and paralyzed by the sight she saw. Katy and Alex sat on the bench near the apple tree, the teen sideways with her legs crossed and the toddler nestled against her chest on her lap. Ruby took a couple steps towards the railing, but neither of the girls noticed her presence.

"Did you know that my mommy and daddy died, too, when I was just a little older than you?" Alex stared up at her, the necklace forgotten in her tiny hand. Finally, she shook her head. "They did, and my brothers. They were twins, like your mama is carrying in her belly now. They were almost the age I am now." Katy explained in terms the girl understood, careful to choose the rights words.

"Why did they die?" Alex queried, an expression of wonder on her little face.

Katy bowed her head and pressed her lips to the side of the girl's knotted blonde hair. After a long moment, she took a deep breath and sat up again. "An army came, and they fought them so that I could be free. They fought for me, just like your mom and dad fought for you. They gave up everything to make sure that you were safe."

"But they left you alone," Alex protested the wrong done to her in the way only a child might, and Katy wiped at her eyes discreetly. Katy recognized the tactic of focusing on her instead of admitting that she felt lonely, if the child understood what loneliness felt like. It'd taken her years to understand the intense emotions behind her family's death. Captain did many things for her, but explaining death and assisting her with the grieving process never made that list.

"They did, but a very nice woman found me. Do you remember Captain?" Alex nodded, her eyes focused on the pendant once more, dissociating but interested. "She made sure that I was safe and that I wasn't alone."

"Did she become your mommy?" Alex pondered, nose wrinkling in confusion at how such a thing was possible. Katy laughed at the innocent question, pulling herself through the fresh pain.

"No, not like your Wolf and Mama, but she was really good to me. She taught me how to protect myself and how to survive and keep going even though I missed my parents and brothers so much." Katy's voice cracked and caught in her throat, and she hugged the girl tighter.

"Will you teach me?" Alex asked innocuously, but the very real in pain her voice and the tears in her eyes spoke of the deeper anguish hidden behind the question. "It doesn't feel good."

Katy lost it.

She buried her face in Alex's hair and loosed a heartbreaking sob that Alex returned, clutching tightly at the shoulder of her big sister's shirt like she had nothing else in this world to cling to. After a few minutes of a much needed cry, Katy pulled back and smoothed Alex's hair and dried her tears while her own lingered on her cheeks. Alex reached up with both hands at the same time and dabbed at them clumsily. Katy smiled and kissed the tip of her nose.

"I'll teach you whatever you want to know," she promised. "You're stuck with me, kiddo."

"Captain was my friend," Alex confided, sharing even more of her secret pain at the loss of another person who had become a regular in her life. "I want her to come back."

"I want her to come back, too," Katy whispered, her voice a scratchy rumble that barely reached the patio.

"It don't feel good when friends die," Alex proclaimed as if it were the first time anyone had ever thought that thought.

Katy's chin quivered, and Alex caught the tears that spilled onto her cheeks. She knew the child understood grief, but her advanced understanding of human nature shocked her. How could a three-year-old comfort her by wiping her tears better than the adults of her family? "I lost a friend recently, too. He wasn't a very good person. He hurt me and a lot of people I love, but I loved him and I miss him."

"But he was bad?" Alex clarified, clueless to the fact that the people he hurt were those closest to her.

Katy nodded, unable to speak. Alex studied her face for a minute and then dropped her eyes back to the pendant on Katy's chest, fingering the wooden disc. "Mama hurt Wolf at Granny's and she had to go away for a while to rest," she revealed another secret, feeling safe and secure in the intimate space between them.

"I know she did, Baby, but you know that she would never hurt you right?" Katy floundered, not having expected the conversation to take this path. She tucked hair behind Alex's ear and ducked her head, leaning back to study the girl's face.

"I don't want her to hurt Wolf anymore. It makes me mad." She sniffed and then huffed, trying to control her emotions like she'd seen the adults in her life do so many times.

"She won't, and Wolf forgave her, so maybe you think you can, too? Sometimes, people do things that they think will make them feel better and they hurt the people they love, but you see, that's the great thing about family, they'll forgive you no matter how badly you mess up. It just takes a while sometimes." Katy bowed her head, resting her forehead on Alex's temple. She'd shared more with Alex in the past five minutes than she had with any of them in the past five days. Somehow it felt right to share her experiences with the girl before that anger took root in such a young heart. Alex deserved better than what had been unintentionally done to her. Conceal the hurt, hide the pain, feel nothing.

"I hurt Wolf, too. I hurt her real bad," she whispered.

"Will she forgive you?" Alex asked, more serious than any child should have been.

"I don't know. I hope so," Katy answered honestly, more tears tumbling onto her cheeks. "What I did isn't the kind of hurt that can be healed easily. Sometimes, people don't deserve to be forgiven, that's the kind of hurt I caused."

Alex raised her head slowly and touched her cheeks again. "But you're family. You're my sister. Mama told me. Wolf says that we do anything for family," Alex contradicted her statement with a more honest truth, the kind only children and drunk people achieved. It was simple and pure, and to Katy, it meant everything. She pulled the toddler into her again, and they cried together once more.

Ruby slipped away from the railing and returned to the kitchen, wiping tears of her own. Snagging her phone from the table, she tapped the screen until Jack's name appeared again and sent the call through without hesitation. She hated asking him for help. She hated feeling inadequate as a wolf because she couldn't track Emma and Regina, but she didn't matter.

His gruff voice rumbled through the speaker, and Ruby turned her back to Snow before speaking. "Jack, I need your help."

"I need your help, too. Do you think you could snag one of your doctor friends and meet me near Toll Bridge?" The question presented a thousand more in Ruby's mind, but something in Jack's voice conveyed the seriousness of the situation.

"Are you hurt?" She asked, not necessarily concerned for his wellbeing as much as their ability to find Emma and Regina without him. Granny's heightened senses had dulled over the years, and without a clear trail, she fell short.

"No, I'm fine, but my friend needs a doctor. She's hurt pretty badly. I think she has a broken arm and there are lots of cuts and bruises. She's in a lot of pain," Jack explained quickly without divulging too much information. "Just meet me here, and I'll help you find Emma and Regina once I know she's okay."

Ruby jerked, not expecting the bargaining chip he held over her. It wasn't like Jack who had done nothing but fulfill her every whim and wish in attempt to gain entry into her life. "Done. Give me half an hour," Ruby snapped and hung up the phone. She sent a text to Eva with the information and then went in search of Belle. She found her in the living room with her head in her hands, clearly miserable.

"Babe, I have to go. Do you want me to have David come over or will you and Snow be okay?" She approached the other woman with caution, physically and verbally. A hormone bomb exploding was the last thing she wanted right that second.

"I'll be fine," Belle muttered without raising her head, voice raspy from puking. Beyond acknowledging that she'd spoken, Belle remained uninterested in her plans.

"Jack's going to help me find Emma and Regina," she explained.

"I know. I heard," she snapped, pulling at her hair slightly to alleviate the anger swelling in her chest. "Your children are enhancing my senses," she added a moment later.

"Belle, I'm sorry," Ruby apologized and dropped to her knees in front of her lover. "I wish I could help you figure all of this out right now, but I have to go." The text tone of her phone sounded, punctuating her words, and she winced as Belle whimpered and pressed her hands harder into her head. Snapping it off, she tossed the phone to the floor and covered Belle's hands with her own and pressed a kiss to the crown of her head.

"Go be a big damn hero, Ruby Lucas. I've reached the end of my patience with this situation," Belle admitted. Five days, she'd been home five days. With a deep breath, she raised her head and met Ruby's eyes. "I'm sorry. Being here is hard enough without a crisis the first moment I arrive. I'm scared that the stress will cause another flashback. I don't want to be another burden to you."

"Never," Ruby dismissed the notion easily and cupped Belle's cheek. "Stay here just in case. You're the only one strong enough to protect everyone. Want me to call Granny and Bethany?"

Belle shook her head as she dropped it into her hands again. "I'll text them with an update and ask them to come over." Her stomach roiled and quivered, and she released a shaky breath.

"I love you," Ruby whispered, considering her lover's hyperaware ears. "I'll call as soon as I know something." Belle only nodded without looking up, and Ruby forced her body into motion before she changed her mind and remained at Belle's side.

When Ruby reached the Toll Bridge, Jack and Lauren had already arrived. At her questioning expression, Lauren shrugged and held up Eva's black bag she used during home visits. "She had a thing."

"Gee, that's specific," Ruby muttered, not at all happy about the vagueness of the statement. They fell into step behind Jack who led them down the embankment and across the river.

"Amelia pulled a couple stitches trying to recreate the confinement potion. It will be done by this evening and just needs some more of Regina's blood to activate it. She's fine but right now, Eva seems to be the only person she'll listen to. I don't think she's slept since Emma told her about her memories," Lauren explained. "Between the stress and the fact that she's been taking narcotics…" The statement hung openly, but it required no further words. A healthy dose of trepidation line Lauren's youthful features, and Ruby felt almost guilt for taking after Amelia like she had. Sure, they wanted to pluck the other's eyes out and feed them to squirrels, but they both loved the same people and sacrificed whatever necessary to protect them. Amelia was blunt, but thus far she'd only spoken the truth. The more she thought about it, the more her need to constantly bicker with the neurosurgeon stemmed from her own ego rather than founded arguments.

The rest of the trek passed in silence. Jack led them over a seemingly well-traveled path cut through the forest and up the moderately steep mountain side. Ruby huffed and puffed in an effort to keep up with the wolf in a mortal's body but refused to ask him to slow down. A few times he reached back and steadied her when she tripped over a lose rock or root, and she growled at him each time. She wasn't a child, even if she was his child. Nearly halfway up, he uncovered the entrance to a hidden cave and ducked inside.

Ruby glanced around, suddenly wary of the remoteness of the area. She hadn't trusted Jack to begin with, but her rising hackles told her to run. Lauren apparently felt it, too, because she stifled a shiver in vain and looked to her for procedural instructions. "Stay behind me. If this is an ambush, I can hold them off with magic long enough for you to get out of here and get some help."

Lauren chuckled. "Ruby, I'm a succubus and can sway any I wish to my will. You should probably stay behind me. I don't need magic, just chi. Save your energy." She ducked into the cave brazenly, and Ruby followed.

They prepared for an ambush. They prepared for the worse. But, nothing could have prepared them for the sight of dozens of people living in a single cave, dirt covering their faces. Thin beds made of linen and not much more lined the walls. A few fires heated the damp air, and a stream ran through the center of the large cavern. A few children splashed and squealed in delight, happy to have an activity and companionship. Even more disturbingly, on the innermost wall, shackles hung against the damp rock, the dirt beneath disrupted from a violent struggle.

"Jack, what the hell is this?" Ruby demanded, her heart aching with the thought of how long these people had lived in these conditions. She recognized none of them.

"After the entire town turned on you, Snow White's closest companion, did you think we'd reveal just how many wolves came to Storybrooke with the curse?" He sounded angry at the injustice, and Ruby, not for the first time, agreed with him. This was unacceptable. Everyone feared for their lives and families and would rather live in a refugee camp than in their town.

"Jack, who's hurt?" Lauren barked, clearly as uncomfortable as Ruby.

"Batch is over here." He directed them towards one of the sleeping places near the back wall where a woman laid still but the shallow wheeze of her ragged breathing.

Lauren dropped to her knees instantly and opened Eva's bag. "Batch, I know you're in a significant amount of pain right now. I'm going to give you some morphine to help you breathe a little more easily, okay." She spoke soothingly, undoubtedly already using her chi tricks to calm the woman. She injected her arm and then pulled more supplies from the bag.

Holding gauze and disinfectant wipes in her hands, Lauren studied the breathing and then raised her eyes to Jack. "She needs a hospital, Jack." He shook his head, and Lauren added, "Eva will not reveal her identity. She doesn't care if she's a wolf or a fairy or a fucking garden gnome. She just wants to help people, and if a rib has punctured her lung, you're lucky she isn't dead yet."

With a deep breath, Jack gave one curt nod, obviously fulfilling a leadership role within the camp. He ambled off to find volunteers to carry her off the mountain, and Lauren pulled out her cell phone to call Shay and Dawson. The operated in discretion, and an ambulance from the Toll Bridge to the hospital sounded much better than a stretcher.

"Rumpel…stilt…skin," Batch forced out between gasps.

"What?" Ruby blurted and dropped to her knees next to Lauren.

"Regina… and… Ru…Ru." A coughing fit stole her breath, and Lauren touched the woman's face tenderly.

"It's okay, Batch," she promised. "Did Rumpelstiltskin do this to you?" The wolf nodded, and Lauren met Ruby's eyes.

"Ruby, where's the dagger?" She whispered, but her voice echoed on the walls anyway.

"Emma hid it because she didn't want to carry it while she was in my body. Regina must have found it."

"You better hope Emma's as good as you think she is," Lauren snapped and leaned over the injured woman once more. Three steps up, one giant kick in the teeth back.

"Lauren," Jack called as he approached with two young men and antiquated stretched. "If you don't mind sticking around for a bit, I'll start the search for Emma. These people haven't seen someone with medical training in quite some time," Jack admitted with more than a hint of sadness while the two boys loaded Batch onto the stretcher.

Lauren only nodded, but her focus remained on her patient currently grasping her hand tightly, soaking up all the comfort the succubus offered. She smoothed the woman's hair back tenderly and left it there to stroke her thumb just above her eyebrow. "I called some friends. They're going to meet you at Toll Bridge with an ambulance. They're safe. They came to the line after Emma's accident." She grabbed a pack of gauze and a pen from the bag and scribbled a message on it and then slipped it into Batch's hand.

"Batch, give this to Eva Zambrano when you arrive at the hospital. Callie Torres will set your arm. You shouldn't need more than those two, okay? You can trust them." Batch nodded and covered her hand. Lauren gave her another moment of her time and energy, doing what she was obviously meant to do. Ruby had never seen her in action except on them, which never gave her the opportunity to really study the nurse in her element. Lauren could have ruled the world with her powers, but she chose to comfort scared and injured people instead. It was beautiful.

"Ruby," she said softly and touched the wolf's arm, wincing softly at the energy she found there. "Don't use magic if you can help it. There's something Eva and I haven't told you, but it's time. I thought we could fix this before it got this bad, but absorbing Regina's energy took a lot out of you. Don't ask any questions, just trust me. It's called soul poisoning. Your soul is dying because Emma's body is using up its energy faster than it can be restored. I can give you a boost of chi when you get back, but until then, just limit your magic usage, okay."

"What? Seriously?" Ruby deadpanned. At Lauren's pointed look, Ruby conceded to her wishes of not asking questions. "Fine, but when I get back we are also going to chat about when it is appropriate to keep secrets." She turned and stalked off behind Jack, consciously keeping her eyes pointed at his back instead of soaking up the heartbreaking scene any longer.

As much as it pained her, Ruby knew that other things took precedence to a cave full of disenfranchised wolves, so she stood and left them in Lauren's capable hands. Just one more thing to set right, but rarely one that slammed so close to her heart. She shut it down and followed the older wolf to the entrance of the cave. She'd save her people after she saved Emma and Regina.


	21. Understanding

So glad I bit the bullet and wrote this yesterday in spite of my achy wrist because we had a flood at work last night. Sprinkler system burst in the cold, so my beautiful 132 year old mansion now has three completely flooded rooms. Got home and my pet mouse had died sometime in the night. Ever feel like the world is against you? Thank the muse fairies for SQ!

Enjoy, lovelies!

Songs: Beneath you Beautiful by Labrinth and Emeli Sande, Classic by MKTO

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><p>Emma jerked to reality. She must have dozed off unintentionally at some point. Of course she'd conked out with nothing but a gentle swish and trickle of a dim cave surrounding her. Regina froze above her, holding a blanket halfway over her body. She lowered it over her torso and retreated a few steps backwards. Emma squinted at the woman, unsure of which version she currently observed. Without comment Regina turned toward the small stream and knelt in the wet sand. She'd changed from the skirt and heels to leather riding pants and boots sometime during the night, but the shirt stayed the same, probably because of the burn wound.<p>

"Thanks," Emma expressed her gratitude in a gravelly, sleepy voice. She pulled herself to a sitting position and worked the kinks out in only a few seconds – she would miss Ruby's body when they switched back – and pulled the blanket around her shoulders.

"You were shivering," Regina clipped noncommittally, still hiding which version she'd received upon waking.

Regina pulled gently at the shirt melted to her skin and winced harshly. "The little bitch refuses to heal us," she growled. Ah. That one.

Emma took a deep breath, dispelling the spike of adrenaline that the knowledge brought. She tugged the blanket around her more securely and cleared her throat. "Do you want me to help you?" Her stomach tightened when no immediate reaction followed. She expected belligerent refusal, but Regina's shoulders only tightened.

"Do you think I'd allow her out so easily?" She finally snapped, and Emma's chest dipped with the impact of the words. This woman only wanted someone to care, to love her. The bluster and bravado she witnessed at the mansion the previous night seemed just that. She'd never intended to kill Belle or hurt their children. The attempt to brainwash Katy looked more and more like a desperate stab at nurturing someone, being needed and loved in return. Her captivity, too, had been a snap decision made out of desperation to keep everyone else off-kilter than an actual threat to her, especially since she'd seen the extent of Ruby's scars. A part of her had to know that they loved the dark part of her as much as the light side. Both sides completed Regina, leaving an incomplete soul without the darkness. It hurt Emma's heart.

"No, I'll talk to you if you want to talk," she offered sincerely.

Regina glanced over her shoulder, and Emma shrugged with a lopsided grin on her cheeks. "It's the least I can do to repay you for the blanket," she added, hoping to show Regina that kindness begot kindness. It wasn't a contest or a mind game or a swap. Kindness simply was.

Suspiciously, Regina studied her features, gauging her intentions. "I do not wish to talk," she rumbled defensively and turned back to the river. She scooped more chilled water into a cupped hand and drizzled it over her shoulder, wincing again.

"Then I'll talk. Just let me help you," Emma compromised. "That's going to get seriously infected if you don't take care of it."

Regina exhaled sharply, shoulders dropping with the sound. "Fine," she barked and sent an echo throughout the cave.

Emma sat up completely, pulled Ruby's shredded shirt around her stomach, and folded her legs in front of her beneath the blanket bunched around her hips. Regina stood in front of her as though she still decided whether this sounded like a good idea or not. Decision made, she dropped to the soft ground and scooted close enough for Emma to touch her shoulder. Emma released the breath she'd unknowingly held and offered a nervous smile that she hoped conveyed encouragement instead of fear.

"Will you poof us some supplies?" She asked. "Gauze patches and some antibacterial cream and hot water, something to clean this with to start," she instructed The Queen gently, not wanting to offend her.

Regina waved her hand and the requested materials appeared on the blanket. "Thanks," Emma said brightly. She silently cursed her trembling hand as she reached for the wash cloth in the bowl of steaming water and prayed that Regina chocked it up to the cold cave air instead of the sliver of fear that spiked her adrenaline.

"You've cleaned my wounds so many times," Emma murmured before thinking too much about which words slid from her mouth. She'd promised Regina that she'd talk and intended to keep her word, build a rapport with this newly presented side of Regina. She'd always known it existed, felt certain that she'd seen it a few times. She certainly saw it when Regina killed Ben and destroyed his body and attacked Jason at the town line when he attempted to kidnap her.

Regina winced when the cloth touched her shoulder and gritted her teeth against the pain. "I'm sorry," Emma whispered, focusing on her task. She dabbed at the torn and ragged flesh. Burn blisters bubbled on the area, but most of the skin looked as though it'd been scraped away with a razor. How had Regina endured this injury without the assistance of pain medicine?

"Belle packs a helluva a wallop, doesn't she?" Emma murmured, more to herself than to Regina, but the women stiffened beneath her touch anyway. "Sorry, just caught me off-guard is all. I mean, that's got to be scary as fuck for her."

"It is unusual," Regina agreed. With a hum, she released a deep breath that moved her chest. "Perhaps the fact that her children were magically conceived is affecting the pregnancy," she suggested.

"That sounds plausible," Emma agreed with an absent nod as she focused on the task at hand.

Regina hummed again but remained otherwise silent. Emma glanced up every few seconds, but the usually expressive if slightly reticent face remained unreadable. Emma's brow furrowed, denting four little crevices there, but if Regina noticed, she refused to acknowledge by breaking the intense staring contest she competed in with the wall.

"I got into a scrape like this once before," Emma offered just to break the silence, not yet comfortable enough with this Regina to allow the quiet to extend. My friend Casey and I were running from this group of guys who got a little too frisky with us at a bar. She kneed him in the nuts and started a whole damn bar fight." She rinsed the cloth and wrung it out before continuing.

Instinctively, Emma touched Regina's bicep with her free hand as she dabbed. She froze for a moment, glanced up at Regina's carefully blank face, and left it there. Emma returned to her work and story. "So, this huge, beefy guy comes at her, and I, in all my glory, decide to bash my beer bottle on his head. Turns out, when a fucker is made of steel, bottles don't actually break on their skulls. He just kind of…"

Emma sat up straight and puffed out her arms and cheeks, growling in her best zombie impression while rocking from side to side to simulate how the man walked. Regina's mouth twitched like she might have wanted to smile at The Savior's antics but remained stoically neutral, but a lightness filled her eyes previously unseen. Emma laughed at herself and deflated to resume her task.

"Needless to say, we took off like rabbits jacked up on crack, but we obviously picked the escape route from hell because anything that could go wrong did go wrong that night." Emma kept her voice light as she tugged at the piece of shirt attached to Regina's skin. The Queen closed her eyes and swallowed audibly against the obvious pain, so Emma kept talking.

"First, we ran straight into a fucking construction site. I fell into a patch of wet cement and jabbed my leg on a piece of rebar. I was covered in the stuff. We kept going, but the cement dried on my clothes until I was basically a walking mummy. Couldn't move at all, and the shit burned my skin, which I later discovered."

Regina's mouth twitched again, and Emma gave her a moment to enjoy the feeling before tugging at the shirt again. It came loose with a jag of skin. Blood beaded in that spot instantly, and she covered it with the washcloth to clot it a bit. Regina sighed harshly and bowed her head slightly. It had to have hurt far worse than she allowed Emma to see, but The Savior expected nothing less from the emotionally stunted woman. Show no weakness, feel no pain.

She held the cloth there and brushed tiny, comforting caresses against Regina's bicep with her thumb, soothing her with what she had, which wasn't much with bulky shackles in the way. Regina gave no protest, so Emma allowed the moment to linger.

"So, Casey decides to cut my clothes off," Emma says in a voice too soft to be appropriate for this part of what was supposed to be a funny story. "She pulls out her pocket knife because we always carried one and pushes me up against the wall of this building and cuts my shirt in the back and made cut off shorts out of my jeans.

"Of course she cuts my bra, so she ties it in a knot, which just pushed everything up like a corset, and just casually forgets to tell me that she ripped my jeans too short so one of my ass cheeks is hanging out. So, I'm shirtless, pantsless, and I have these disgusting red splotches all over my body, and about that time, this cop rolls up."

"Were you arrested?" Regina asked when Emma paused to check the bleeding wound beneath the cloth.

Emma chuckled. "Actually, no. The guys chasing us rounded the corner about that time, took one look at the cop car and bolted in the other direction. The cop put two and two together and took off after them, but Casey and I never stuck around to press charges because half of what we'd done that night violated our parole. So, we just went home and called it a night. Took about a week before I could sit without my ass burning."

Regina snorted and raised an eyebrow. "You do realize that situation bears no similarities to this one."

"Yeah, well…" Emma left the statement open, concentrating intensely on a particularly nasty spot.

Regina craned her neck to see the spot on her chest that had turned cold from the now unpleasant cloth. Emma pulled it away with a steady hand, dabbing a couple of times at the spot. "I think I got the bleeding stopped," she whispered in the few inches that now separated their faces. She rolled her eyes upwards to meet Regina's without moving her head, quite conscious of the intimacy of their current position. The Queen blinked, shattering the moment.

"Flesh wound," Regina sassed in a sardonically high-pitched voice and raised her head, pulling them through the oddly sensual moment.

Emma chuckled and nodded. Anxious sweat dampened her dry palm and heated the other. "You're not like I expected her," she said suddenly, and the tension clamped around them again.

"What did you expect? A foul savage with no human qualities?" Regina snapped, retreating to the anger that protected her for so long.

Emma surprised both of them when she said, "Yes." Regina's face hardened further, brow furrowing with the painful honestly of the admission. Emma squeezed her arm, catching her attention even if Regina refused to look at her. "I was wrong," she added in a humbled whisper.

Regina's eyes shot towards The Savior, but Emma had already turned to the other medical supplies. Regina studied the calm confidence Emma carried now that she wasn't threatening to rape or kill her. She ripped open a sterile gauze pad and covered a finger, using the others to hold it tight while she spread the clear antibacterial substance over the tip.

"Ready?" Emma asked, catching her gaze in case Regina refused a verbal answer.

"I'm not a child, Savior," Regina snapped, insulted by the insinuation that she somehow needed coddled.

Emma only grinned cheekily and returned to the wounds, dabbing the cream over the area. "I'm not going to tape this down, but you should have enough on here to hold the gauze in place. It should breathe anyway, so your blisters can dry up." She spoke and dabbed, added more medicate gel, repeated.

"This is going to sound really weird," Emma started when she tossed the used gauze to the side and pulled open fresh packages, unfolding them to their thinnest layer, just enough to keep dirt out of the wounds. "This is the first chance we've really had to be alone since I lost my memories. It's kind of nice."

"Well, you certainly know how to romance a girl," Regina jabbed, glancing around the cave with a sarcastically raised eyebrow.

Emma laughed out loud and followed her gaze. "Oh come on, a little candle light." She pointed to the fireballs above them. "A nice, peaceful river." A nod towards the stream. "Handcuffs and a sleeping bag. It's like romance: 50 Shades of Grey style," she finished with a flourish of her hands in the air like a banner.

"What is 50 Shades of Grey?" Regina asked seriously.

"Uhh, a book. I think they're making a movie, too. It's about BDSM as far as I can tell, but I haven't read it," Emma answered bashfully. She and Regina must have played around with it at some point, but her memories failed her. "It's actually pretty popular, but I think most people just want it because it makes them feel dirty."

"That doesn't sound like proper literature on the subject," Regina dismissed the book immediately, sensing the inadequacy of its wisdom.

Emma shrugged. "It's just a cultural taboo that's becoming more mainstream, so people are flocking to it, even if it's bad or inaccurate. They like to feel naughty."

"Why not simply practice the acts?" Regina questioned seriously. The fact that Emma finished applying the gauze, forgotten, spoke to the trust Regina still held for the broken savior. "If people are interested in the subject, they shouldn't substitute such trash for useful facts. _Screw the Roses, Give me the Thorns_ is a wonderful resource." Regina lifted her uninjured shoulder and quirked an eyebrow when Emma's face's filled with a mixture of disbelief and curiosity. "I have your wife's memories, and she read plenty on the subject."

"Huh," Emma grunted, not really shock. Her eyes shifted over Regina's body without her permission, her heart calling to her dark captor. She felt less like a hostage in that moment and more like a partner. "I'd be game for some rough action, I think, but I don't know a whole lot about it," Emma flirted shamelessly, resting her forearms on her bent knees.

"You were learning," Regina assured her in a husky rumble that sent a shiver down Emma's spine. This woman behaved nothing like she'd expected. Though no doubt a tigress lurked beneath this calm and cheeky exterior, Emma felt no fear, no apprehension of choosing this side over the other side. The easy banter and lack of judgment for past deeds, Emma realized, left Amelia feeling nostalgic for her former mistress, not the destruction and recklessness of their lives together. She missed this woman and the brokenness of her humanity, not the glorification of her darkness.

"Really now? Is that why you were reading about it? Want to tell me about it?" She heard herself say even as her thoughts raced with theories of what made Regina Regina, quite enjoying the playfulness she seemed to have found in The Evil Queen.

Regina smirked, eyes darkening in pleasure. "No," she said simply, teasing.

"Guess I don't have to ask who was the submissive," Emma jabbed right back, more curious than upset about Regina's refusal. The refusal honestly came expectedly. That type of relationship required as much trust as a marriage, the trust that a Dom has enough control to stop when asked, the trust that a sub won't run from or judge the darkness or anger or need for control. This Regina trusted no one.

"Occasionally, I allowed you to… how is it phrased in this world… top from the bottom." Emma cocked her head to the side, and Regina smirked. "She allowed you to control the situation if she felt she needed your love more than control. I'd never allow such an undisciplined puppy in my house." She switched pronouns frequently, protecting herself from the lighter emotions embedded in the memories.

Emma's smile grew. "What else did we do?" She asked, genuinely curious but impish to keep the conversation light. If The Evil Queen took her memories, then she decided that she should be the one to give them back to her. Regina smirked, a twinkling defiance in her eyes that indubitably said, 'In your dreams, Savior.'

Emma's stomach protested, and they both dropped their gazes to the concealed organ. "How about breakfast then?"

"I suppose you're useless as a hostage if you starve to death," Regina snarked and pushed her body to her feet. With a wave over her shoulder, an apple appeared in Emma's lap. The Savior laughed heartily at the dubious meaning of the fruit and snatched it up. Regina smirked over her shoulder before disappearing into the darkness of the cave too far to see the expression.

Emma crunched into the apple without fear and leaned into the wall, grinning like a fool at the darkness. As far as hostage situations went, this wasn't as horrible as she'd anticipated.


	22. Human

Sorry, this took a bit longer than usual. Application deadline for an MFA program is coming up, so I'm trying to get writing samples edited to perfection.

Enjoy, my sweets, and hopefully this is back up to par of my usual writing angst.

Song: Beautiful Disaster by Jon McLaughlin

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><p>"This is where we lost the trail," Ruby lamented, coming to a stop where Emma's shirt still laid on the ground to mark the area. That patch of forest rested about a mile from the park. It meant nothing to Ruby, nothing to any of them – just a patch of pines.<p>

"There's no scent of her here, Ruby. I'm sorry," Jack informed his hopeful daughter, his heart pinching at the increasingly crestfallen features of a woman far too young to bear so many lines on her face, even one that belonged to another.

Ruby rolled her eyes towards the thick canopy of needles and then collapsed to the ground all at once. Jack jerked forward to catch her until her realized that emotion and not the soul sickness fevering her body brought Ruby to the ground. "I can't," Ruby choked as she pulled her knees to her chest and hid her face between them. The violent quivering of her shoulders and back and soft gasps indicated her tears.

Jack knelt on one knee, close enough to hold her if she wanted that but far enough to give her a respectful amount of space. "You can," he said softly.

She laughed self-deprecatingly and raised a red face to glare at him, unable to cope with wiping her tears. "Running away is in my blood. I'm not a hero. I'm not special. I'm just a stupid wolf who tried to live in a human world who ostracized her people to a fucking refugee camp in a cave." She lowered her head again as a fresh torrent of tears spilled onto her cheeks.

Jack bowed his head and accepted the overdue anger he'd expected weeks ago. Perhaps the soul poisoning loosened Ruby's tongue or exhausted her emotionally, frayed her resolve to pretend that nothing affected her. He grabbed her shoulders and held them tightly, undeterred by the snap glare she threw upon him. His wolf strength far surpassed Emma's if Ruby lashed out. He could take his blows.

"You have Granny in your blood, Child," he declared forcefully. The words slapped her hard. He never apologized or justified his mistakes or her mother's, he dove straight for the throat of what made Ruby so damn resilient. As much as she hated him for knowing her so well, the self-pity and hopelessness slipped away slowly, eclipsed by the determination she'd learned from the one person who had never given up on her.

"She'd slap my head right now," Ruby said in a slightly congested, nasally voice of tears. A curt laugh followed and then a tiny smile.

Jack allowed a lightness to fill his eyes, in awe of the transformation. "You good?" Ruby nodded and allowed him to help her to her feet. "So, now what do we do?" He asked, still holding her shoulders.

"We do the next step. A Heroines of Storybrooke crisis is sort of like rehab, you just do the next thing, take the next step. Everything usually works itself out." They shared a little laugh at her analogy. She grinned up at him, grateful.

"We make sure Batch is okay," she said as though it were the simplest answer in the world. To her, it was. She swiped sweat from her forehead with the side of her hand and spun out of the embrace to start the trek back towards town.

"Uhh, Ruby?" Jack called, still in the same spot. He jerked a thumb over his shoulder. "Hospital's that way."

"Right," Ruby replied and switched directions without a pause. Emma's body severely need a private session with nature to get in tune with it. Without Jack, she'd have been lost in the forest three times now. Eyes rolling with the thought, she forged ahead. Until Regina made another move, they lacked enough resources and information to plan a strategy. Regina revealed nothing about her plans, no demands, nothing to indicate what she intended to do now that The Evil Queen ruled her body.

They traveled in blissful silence to the Toll Bridge where Ruby left Emma's Camry. He shoved his hands into his pockets and hunched his shoulders, and Ruby immediately dropped the arm across her stomach that indicated her unease with the situation. They both pretended not to notice.

"You'll be okay to drive?" He asked when nothing else came to mind.

"I'm not dead yet," she joked. "Although when Eva discovers that I left Lauren alone with a bunch of strange wolves, she might make my brain explode."

Jack took the not-so-subtle hint and grinned in his charmingly boyish way. "I'll look after her," he promised.

"Thanks." She retreated towards the car, but Jack called her name once more. The tone of his voice spoke of his deeper anxieties, and she nodded before he said anything. "When this is over, we are definitely going to figure out what to do about that." She pointed to the mountain, indicating the cave and the gut-ripping scene inside. "And, I'll call when I have an update on Batch."

Relief filled his features, and Ruby's eyes narrowed. He'd wanted her to see it, wanted her to get pissed about what had been done to her people. "Good," he said with a sharp nod and then took off towards the embankment before she said or deciphered anything else.

Ruby slipped behind the wheel and folded her arms over it, resting her head for a moment. Emma's larger breasts pressed on the horn, and she jerked back, pulse thundering in her ears. "Okay, girls, you gotta stop doing shit like that," she berated the perky mounds of flesh that still felt foreign to her equilibrium. Belle must have been truly miserable if her already massive breasts were swelling, which was normal for the earlier and later weeks of pregnancy.

She wiped sweat from her forehead again and took a deep breath. They needed to find Emma and make this right. Taking another moment to simply sit and breathe, Ruby allowed the reality of her situation to sink in, not just the body swap but everything. Belle's pregnancy, their pending living situation, Alex's mistrust of her place in their lives, Katy's disaster. Somehow, the fact that Regina abducted Emma paled in comparison. If she intended to hurt her, she'd have used her as a bargaining chip by now. This queen worried her for the things she hadn't done, not what she had.

This queen reminded her of The Evil Queen's reclusive behavior in the months before she cast The Dark Curse. What purpose could Rumpelstilskin possibly have served? The heart in Ruby's body was protected against being crushed or manipulated, and only Amelia held the reversal potion in her memory – her heart also protected. Amelia and Belle protected the hearts of all the key players in their group, like big heart magic orgy.

Nose wrinkled at the last thought, Ruby sighed and started the car before she gave into her urge for a nap. No one could have possibly seen the ramifications of the curse, and guessing what came next only drove her a bit more insane. Still, as she drove to the hospital on autopilot, her mind wandered in a thousand paths. Barely registering the directions to Batch's room, Ruby walked the too-familiar hospital halls, a thousand images bombarding her.

Lacey's terrified eyes after Belle had lost her memories. Regina's tender hands soothing her after rescuing her from Cora's captivity. Henry reading to them as they recovered. Seeing Annabel the first time, Emma holding her up for them and telling them that they'd named her after her Aunt Ruby, even after the rift she'd torn in Emma and Regina's relationship. Katy, too shy to look at people as she sang, turned her back and hovered near her shoulder.

Ruby jerked to a stop outside the young wolf's room, afraid that she'd begun hallucinating in her feverish state. Katy sat by the bed in the dim room and held the girl's hand, thumbs hooked in sisterhood, and smoothed her hair with the other every ten seconds or so. A soft, melodic tune flowed over her tongue, and the injured wolf responded with a silent trickle of tears from beneath her closed eyelids. An intensity and wisdom beyond her years marked Katy's youthful features, and Ruby found herself powerless to do anything but stare and absorb.

"She showed up about 20 minutes ago." Ruby flinched at the sudden presence she hadn't heard approach. "I called Belle to let her know," Eva said softly at her shoulder. Ruby nodded, still too flabbergasted to speak and slightly unnerved that people snuck up on her so easily now.

"Batch is okay. No surgery, but I did insert a drain tube. She's young and strong, so she should be fine in a week or two," she explained the technical stuff quickly, sensing Ruby's growing emotional upheaval. The wolf had been growing towards a revelation since Belle left a little over two months prior, and the situation came to head now, it seemed.

"Has she said anything else about what happened?" Ruby asked, more comfortable focusing on the other wolf for the moment.

"She hasn't said anything, not a word. She's medicated, but I thought I'd have to restrain her to keep the tube in. She's settled since Katy turned off the light and started singing." A wistfulness penetrated Eva's usually clipped and irritated tone. She felt something deeper for the young wolf who couldn't have been more than a year or two older than Katy.

"Are her parents coming?" She asked when Ruby remained silent.

Ruby shrugged. "I'm not even sure she has any. It's really bad up there, Eva."

"Lauren told me she needed more supplies. I sent Shay and Dawson back to the Toll Bridge with them. Everyone is getting vaccinated for this world's dangerous but preventable diseases. Measles, whooping cough for the infants. She suspects that a few of them have bronchitis, maybe pneumonia by this point, so antibiotics. Torres went with them to have a look at a few breaks that have healed without being set."

Ruby jumped slightly when Eva touched her shoulder. The seer rarely touched them and never in a lingering and tender show of affection and comfort. Eva squeezed her arm tightly for a few seconds and then dropped her hand to hang at her thigh. "We'll take care of them, Ruby," she vowed, and Ruby nodded without removing her eyes from Katy.

The girl's voice came to a slow halt and then immediately started again. She fell silent when her phone dinged. She punched a few buttons, presumably changing the settings to silent because she tossed the phone towards the sink a moment later, uncaring if the impact or any residual water destroyed the device. Ruby's frown deepened. What the hell was bothering Katy so much on her phone?

Batch startled at the sudden noise, eyes flying open in a wild panic. Katy stood and squeezed her uninjured hand again. "Hey, it's okay," she whispered. "I just threw my phone. Sorry that I scared you. Are you feeling a little more comfortable?"

Batch nodded and then raised the arm covered in a plaster cast with one thin finger extended towards Ruby. Katy glanced over her shoulder, studied Ruby's eyes for a moment, and then gave her attention back to her charge. "Eva already yelled at me for sneaking out," she stayed the pending lecture with a presentation of punishment received. With a sly smile at the wounded girl, she added, "They can't keep track of me." Batch answered with a tiny smile and settled into the bed.

Ruby smiled into a breathy inhalation at the glimpse of the old Katy's attitude shredding the darkness. Something else happened right beneath their noses involving the girl's phone, but far be it from Katy to ever ask for help. Stubborn ass, just like the rest of them. "I know, but who's going to take care of her, Eva?" She asked, eyes raising slowly when she felt ready to absorb the beautiful scene before her.

"Batch is a wolf. She's strong, and even refuses to tell me where it hurts." Eva chuckled a little, the young wolf finally giving her a reason to read someone as she worked on them. She exuded a soothing energy despite her multitude of disappointments and pain throughout her short lifetime.

"Not Batch," Ruby

"Katy's tougher than you think. She got stuck in the angry stage of grieving, Ruby. You, more than anyone, understand how stupid anger makes people behave. Throw a cave of undisciplined wolves on top of it, and that's a recipe for disaster. You're an alpha, even Jack and Granny yield to to you. This is your responsibility." Eva pointed out in her annoying, radically honest but tender way.

Though gentle and quiet, the impact of the words left an ache in Ruby's chest that felt similar to the one Belle left when she'd bolted, even if she had carried two hearts for two months. She'd felt the excruciating emptiness because a huge part of her family disappeared. Regina's words floated through her mind. _Katy is my daughter. I feel it just as I felt it with Henry and Annabel._

Ruby's gaze shifted from Katy's frizzy blonde hair to the wounded wolf, blurring slightly from the fever only to clear a moment later. No matter how much she denied her connection and responsibility to her, Ruby felt it in her heart. Like her, the wolf had dark brown hair, the same long angular face that appeared far more youthful than her years, the same clear porcelain skin, the same wide smile and pronounced canines, a tall and lanky figure, but her eyes resembled Belle's in their glacial allure. The connection felt different from the one she shared with Alex and her new babies still in womb, but to deny that affinity felt like denying her entire identity as a wolf. Eva was right – well, she had an annoying habit of usually being right – Ruby needed these wolves, just as much as she needed Katy and Alex and Annabel and Henry. With that thought heavy on her conscience, Ruby stepped into the room. Batch stiffened at the sudden intrusion, and Katy winced at the amount of pressure on her hand. Damn, wolves were strong.

Eva followed and pulled a stethoscope from the pocket of her coat. "I'm going to listen," she said calmly, tenderly even. Ruby and Katy locked eyes over the surgeon's head, confused by the woman who generally took a stricter stance with patients and left the coddling to the nurses. "Is that okay?" Batch nodded and loosened her death grip on Katy's hand without relinquishing it completely. Eva lowered the instrument to her chest, careful to stay away from the tube.

"You sound much clearer now. Is it easier to breathe?" Batch nodded. For someone who had said only two words since Ruby met her, the girl's enigmatic presence filled the entire room with her huge personality and expressive eyes.

"That's great." Eva smiled brightly at the girl and hooked the rubber tube around her neck. "The bleeding isn't very bad. If you weren't a wolf, I'd do surgery to repair the damage, but your body is much stronger than the average human being." Batch's eyes lit up with what appeared to be an unsure pride. She studied Eva's face as the surgeon checked the bruises on her stomach. "The drainage rate has already slowed quite a bit. You're going to be okay, just got to keep you breathing."

"Eva, I need to know what she saw when Rumpelstiltskin attacked her. Any flashes that might be helpful?" Ruby asked quietly, but the wolf's ears picked up every word.

"Barn," Batch croaked, grimacing like speaking hurt her lungs and throat.

"Barn?" Ruby repeated, and she nodded.

Eva fixed her with a pointed stare, saying more with her irritated eyes than any words that might have rolled over her tongue. Ruby clamped her mouth shut and sat in a chair near the corner of the room. Sweat dampened her lower back and between her breasts. She wiped her forehead and leaned back in the chair.

"Are you hungry, Batch?" she said as her face melted back to that serene, relaxed state. This poor girl had been through hell and back. Eva should have been screaming in agony at the flashes she received. Perhaps her powers evolved, too.

The girl nodded. "Good, that's good. I'll have someone bring you some soup and crackers."

Ruby shivered hard enough to rattle the chair and leaned forward to rest her elbows on her knees, dropping her head into her hands. Eva frowned and touched her shoulder again. "How long have you been feverish?"

"I don't know. I got dizzy last night before Emma got taken, so I'm guessing sometime around then." Ruby stifled a shiver, and Eva set her face to stone cold determination a moment before her hand retracted to her chest. The seer also shuddered involuntarily, recovering from the influx of thoughts and emotions.

"Ruby, you cannot carry your rage in Emma's body," Eva instructed quietly. "I know that you know about the soul poisoning, so you know the importance of conserving what energy you have left. Go eat and calm down before you keel over and die like the idiot mongrel you are. I'll call Lauren and have her return immediately to give you a chi boost. She's the only one who can without Amelia's potion, and she is sedated for the moment."

"I don't know how to not be angry, Eva," Ruby growled, emphasizing her point with the grinding of Emma's teeth. "It's either anger or a straightjacket and bottle of happy pills on the fifth floor." Eva rolled her eyes at the dramatics but lost her chance to berate the obdurate woman.

"Oh good, you're back," a familiar voice called from the doorway. They all glanced over to find Stacy holding a huge manila envelope. Batch shifted in the bed once more, thrown by the stranger, though she knew by sight who Mayor Cochran was. Katy leaned over the girl once more and smoothed her hair back.

"Emma, I know you're in a bit of a crisis right now," she nodded towards the unfamiliar young girl in the bed clinging to Katy's hand, "but I need a word with you and Katy. It's terrible timing, but I thought the sooner this was dealt with, the sooner we might move on and heal."

Brows knitted in confusion and worry, the two followed her into the hallway, leaving Eva to tend to her patient in peace.

"What's up, Stace?" Ruby murmured, dropped her head to her hands, and breathed deeply. She felt sick all over, aching and nauseous and emotionally unstable, like any moment she'd have snapped and exploded brain matter everywhere.

"I thought this particular situation required a familiar face, and Belle said you'd be here." She handed one envelope to Ruby, the other to Katy, and clasped her hands in front of her hips. "I'm required to give it to both guardian and recipient since it was not a family member."

Ruby pulled open the envelope, read the header of the first sheet and dropped and hands to her side without digging further. "Katy is the executor of Ben's estate?"

Stacy nodded. "The letter arrived at Town Hall today from the law office in town. Gwen thought the news would be better received coming from me. She thought it was odd that he came in so hastily with a handwritten will about a week before his death, but with everything that was happening at the time, she simply figured that he feared for his safety since he often helped you out. There is a sealed letter in your envelope, Katy, which I am not required to let you see as acting guardian," she explained, halting Ruby's protests before they started.

Katy held the envelope towards her, hand shaking with the effort of controlling everything. "I don't want this," she said in a voice much smaller and weaker than the young woman attached to it.

Stacy glanced between the two sympathetically. "What you do or do not choose to do with it is your decision, but this is legal and it's yours, Katy."

"Thanks, Stacy," Ruby ushered the moment along as much for Katy's sake as to satisfy her urge to sit down again. Stacy took the cue perfectly, tossed another pitying look towards Katy (which the girl met with scorn and irritation), and then clopped away in her heels to return to her mayoral duties.

"Katy."

"Don't," she warned. "Just fucking… don't," Katy deflated, still holding the envelope an arm length from her body like a striking snake at her heart.

"Bacon," Ruby blurted. "I was going to say we need bacon. I missed breakfast. Want to walk to Granny's with me?" They both glanced towards Batch's room. "I think she's in good hands." Eva hummed that same haunting tune that she'd used to comfort Ruby after Regina rescued her from Hook's ship and smiled softly at the young woman who seemed content to simply hold Eva's kindhearted gaze.

Ruby snagged the envelope from her hands and left them in Batch's room with Eva. Katy shrugged and turned towards the entrance of the hospital. Ruby shoved her hands into denim pockets and fell into step beside the now brooding teenager. They broke into the warm June morning and left the parking lot before either of them spoke.

"So, why did you feel the need to sneak out again?" Ruby asked, hoping her tone remained light enough not to completely shut the girl down and thicken her walls.

Katy shrugged. "When Belle said that the other wolves were too afraid to come to the hospital, I thought she shouldn't be alone, so I came." The answered seemed so obvious to Katy – act and damn the consequence yet again.

"I can't say that I'm happy how you went about it, but…" Ruby revealed half of her thought.

"Just step off, Ruby. You've made it perfectly clear that you tolerate me for Alex, so you don't have to make an effort to punish me for screwing up again. Step away from the bowl, kid! Don't flush your life away!" Katy finished sarcastically, arms gesturing emphatically.

"I'm glad you did," Ruby completed her thought when Katy stopped ranting, halting their progress halfway to Granny's.

"What?" Katy blurted and stopped to stare incredulously at the previously angry wolf.

"I'm glad you were there for her," she repeated, wiped the sweat on her upper lip on the back of her hand and then pushed it through Emma's tangled hair. "I don't like you very much right now, Katy, and it's going to take a long time to regain my trust and earn my forgiveness, but I don't hate you." Ruby spoke mildly, taking Eva's advice and releasing her anger for the moment. It felt quite wonderful, to not feel anger. The need to run, silent. The tenuous control of her primal instincts, unnecessary. She felt human.

"Katy, I'm about to help Belle bring two wolves into a world where we've been hunted and forced into hiding or persecuted to the point of living in squalor simply to survive. I'm tired…" Ruby leaned against the wall of an apartment building, relishing the cool brick against her flushed skin. "I'm tired of fighting and barely scraping by and being scared for my life all the time. I'm tired of feeling so much hatred that I'm literally bursting with it, at the world and Granny and Jack and Belle and you…" Her head drooped in defeat. "Myself."

"Guess you're in good company," Katy murmured, scuffing her pink and grey running shoe against the cement.

"I'm tired, Katy," Ruby repeated, more exhausted than she'd ever felt before. "I just never knew how much until my physical strength, my wolf, was taken from me. It's a part of me, but it doesn't define me. I'm human, Katy. I'm just a woman, nothing more. I feel pain the same way, but no one sees that because outwardly, I'm so strong. I'm just a woman." The words grew in desperation, tears spilling over her cheeks. Her vision blurred, doubled, returned to normal, and Ruby pressed herself harder into the wall to remain upright.

"So am I," Katy connected the dots between them, tethering their heartache together.

Heat rushed to Ruby's head, a faint roaring in her ears. "Katy," she whispered and closed her eyes. "Take me back to Eva."

Katy stepped into her and dipped as Ruby lost her ability to stand upright independently. She grabbed Ruby's hand, slipped the other between her thighs, and hoisted the weight of Emma's body on her sturdy shoulders just as Captain taught her. Ruby moaned into her shoulder, letting her know that she remained conscious.

"Hold on, Ruby," Katy whispered and started the trek back to the hospital, determination and anger at the world keeping the wolf on her back. "I'm not losing anyone else."


	23. Fools

Here ye be, Lovelies. Finally ramping up for the final sprint. As interesting as this has been, I will never write another unplanned story. Just wanted to test my plot abilities without a crutch. I don't like it, but I think I'm doing okay. What do you guys think? The hardest part is keeping all the little nuances in my head.

Song: Fools by Lauren Aquilina

* * *

><p>Belle sat a steaming cup of coffee in front of Snow at the breakfast table in the kitchen and then lowered her aching body into a chair with a cup of her own. "Sometimes, you just need a good cup of coffee," she explained and sipped the comforting liquid. "Oh gods, I've missed coffee," she purred huskily into her cup and followed it with a sensual hum.<p>

Snow chuckled at the woman and sipped from her own cup. "You know how I take my coffee?"

Belle shrugged sheepishly and hid behind her own white mug with the black leaf design. "I notice things and just kind of store them for later." Her eyes dropped to Snow's stomach beneath the table just long enough to the other woman to notice before finding the designs of the cup overly fascinating.

"It's okay, Belle. I can't hide it forever," Snow admitted. "How long have you known?"

Belle shrugged. "It wasn't my place to say anything, but I will tell Emma if you don't in the next couple of weeks. You owe her that much." Protective claws extended slightly, and in true Belle fashion, she remained eerily calm and pleasant while tossing about very real threats.

"I don't know how to talk to her. We planned this pregnancy months before Emma lost her memories. It wasn't done intentionally." Snow rubbed her belly, unable to hide the genuine grin on her lips.

Belle scoffed and stood, taking the coffee with her. "Belle?"

"Why didn't you speak with her then? She went through hell to get back to us, and the second she gets the right heart in her chest, her parents decide they want a second chance at being parents. She gets amnesia and suddenly you disappear from her life. You don't get a do-over because you know how utterly spectacular this failure has been." Belle clamped her mouth shut and breathed deeply, but the anger crashed and swelled once more.

"What the hell is going on in here?" Granny demanded from the doorway, though they both suspected that she already knew because of her advanced hearing, the only thing really left of her wolf.

Belle closed her eyes and crossed her arms beneath her aching breasts. The swell of pregnancy hurt far worse than anything she and Ruby had ever done, perhaps because the sensitive mounds throbbed from the inside out, like a cramp rather than a bruise. Nothing ever came easily, not even children. Anything worth having came difficulty. Belle met Snow's wide and shimmering eyes, wet with tears of truth. No matter which way they spun it, Charming and Snow just damaged their daughter again, maybe irreparably.

"Nothing, Granny. I'm being grouchy," Belle answered after the pause had lingered too long to make the statement true.

"Mhm," Granny grunted. "Why don't you go sit with Alex and Henry while Snow and I finish lunch?" The old woman suggested in a tone that told Belle it wasn't a suggestion at all.

Snow opened her mouth to protest, clamped it shut, and found the floor utterly fascinating. Yeah, Belle thought, Snow's turn for a Granny talk. The woman certainly knew which buttons to push and what topics to steer clear of, the ones that sent already fragile nerves over the edge. Belle almost felt bad for the woman, but someone needed to address this and her anger prevented a rational conversation for the moment.

"Yes, Granny," she murmured in a very Ruby-like acquiescence and loped towards the living room where her daughter hopefully still napped.

The scene that greeted her looked much better. Henry sat in the corner of the couch at an angle with Alex stretched across his lap. A book hovered above her head in the boy's hands, and he read enthusiastically, voice changing with each character who spoke. It took a moment for her to recognize the book as Charlotte's Web. Fantastic, she'll have dreams about her mother dying for a week once they've reached the end. Belle concealed her thoughts with a forced smile and sat at the opposite end of the sofa, reaching for the book.

"Want me to take over?" Belle asked, and Henry handed over the book enthusiastically. Alex scrambled into his lap with the excitement only innocence offered. Belle smiled at them as she ran her fingertips over the bumps of the title on the worn paperback cover. She sniffed at the sudden tears in her eyes and grinned self-consciously at the two sets of young eyes looking up at her.

"Are you okay, Aunt Belle?" Henry asked. He'd never seen her cry before. She always walked around so stoically, like nothing ever bothered her. Even when they'd gone to war together, she rarely showed emotion, mostly to stay connected with the earth's magic.

"Yeah," she whispered wetly. "Just…" she released a shuddering breath. "I'm just happy. Remember the first time I read this to you, Henry? It was the only book we could find in the stronghold, and I spent most of the night reading the whole thing to the children. Do you remember, Alex? I think that was the first time I'd ever seen you laugh."

The child nodded enthusiastically. "You took care of us like Char-lot," she blurted, and Belle's happy mood slipped away in the connection. Charlotte died.

"Mama?" Alex scooted out of Henry's lap and crawled into hers. "Kay says you're stronger than Char-lot." The little girl obviously sensed the darker emotions rumbling beneath her mother's calm exterior. Maybe they had another little succubus on their hands, too in tune with the energy of others.

Belle wrapped her arms around her daughter and leaned to the side to find the girl's bright blue eyes that resembled hers enough to make her forget that Alex hadn't come from her and Ruby. "You talked to Katy about the stories I used to read in the stronghold?"

"She's my best friend," Alex stated matter-of-factly, staring up at her mother like she'd grown two heads, and Belle chuckled at the reflection of her own attitude. Gods, help them when she reached her teenage years.

"Of course, you've spoken to her about it," Belle reckoned, and the toddler nodded once, a sharp show of Ruby peeking through. Belle swore she heard the drawn out 'duuuuuh' in her head.

Belle handed the girl back to Henry, kissed her hair, ruffled Henry's, and then took her place in the middle of the room. "Chapter four: Loneliness," Belle read, opening to the spot where her finger slipped between the pages, marking Henry's progress. Within two minutes, both teenager and toddler cackled at her nasally, obnoxious goose voice and the quivering cadence of the lamb and Templeton's high-pitched, New York inflection. She strutted back and forth, her gait changing with each new animal impression, losing herself in the moment and world of the book that had brought them all together as a family in that god-awful place, even the other parents and older children.

"Salutations!" Belle squeaked enthusiastically, raising her arms and positioning her fingers like the legs of a spider.

"Salu-what?" Henry and Alex answered in unison.

"Salutations!" Belle repeated, happy that they'd remember the little thing they'd made up in the shelter she'd created for them during the war.

Granny allowed the moment to linger until the chapter finished in the next minute. She stepped into the room, holding out Belle's cell phone that had been left on the island in the kitchen. "Belle, it's Katy."

"Want to take over, Granny?" Belle asked. Her face flushed with the excitement of the moment, a brilliant smile on her face, beautiful despite the jagged reminder of torn flesh upon her cheek.

They switched objects, and Belle thudded into the foyer in her combat boots before pressing it to her ear. "Hello," she said breathlessly, still winded from her grand performance of the chapter.

"Belle, keep your tits on, but Ruby's in the hospital," Katy stated bluntly. No point mincing words or beating around the bush about it.

"What?" She digested the information, took a deep breath. "What happened?" The words sounded far more irritated than she felt. She felt fear, and her hand wrapped around her gently curving stomach preparing for childbirth.

"Do you know what soul poisoning is?" Katy asked.

"I'm going to kill that bloody seer," Belle seethed. "I knew there was more to this than we were told. Eva has been far too pleasant about helping us." Belle paced as she spoke, drawing Snow from the kitchen.

"Stay put, Katyline. I'm coming to you. What room are you in?" Belle demanded, seeing nothing but losing Ruby.

"Belle, Ruby wants to talk to you," Katy said quickly. Scratching followed, the distinct sound of someone else grabbing the phone.

"Baby?" Came the raspy voice of Emma Swan.

"Don't 'Baby' me. How long have you been sick?" Belle demanded and finally planted herself in the middle of the foyer.

"It doesn't matter. Look, I'm fine. Stay put, stay with the kids. Katy's with me," Ruby spoke quickly but calmly, assuring Belle as best she could.

"Ruby Lucas," she breathed, eyes closing as fear eclipsed the anger.

"I know, Baby. I should have told you, okay, but I didn't want to worry you. Lauren is going to give me a chi transfusion, so I won't get any worse. Stay put." Ruby sounded confident. No underlying fear reached Belle's ears. She knew when Ruby put up a brave front, knew when she was needed to quell the darkness surrounding her tortured lover, but none of that registered. Ruby worried, but she hadn't slipped into fear yet, perhaps her anger at Katy kept it at bay.

"Sweetheart, you and Katy together cannot lead to anything pleasant, especially if you're sick. You're a horrible patient," Belle attempted to uncover the sudden comradery that seemed to be budding between the two.

"Belle, I'm fine, really. Katy and I are being civil if that's your concern," Ruby joked, and Belle's entire face tightened into the epitome of confusion about the weird and unusual behavior.

"Listen, Batch, that wolf Lauren sent to the hospital, she mentioned something about a barn when I asked her about Rumpelstiltskin," Ruby said hurriedly, using most of the reserve strength in Emma's body and her frazzled emotional state to keep her fiancée calm and focused.

"I'll think on it," she promised, too distracted by Ruby's condition to worry about the new knowledge for the moment. "Ruby, I do not like this. I want to be there with you."

"I know, Baby, but I'm fine, really. The kids need at least one of their parents right now. Katy and I are fine, and Eva is here. Who's going to fuck with a seer as powerful as her, right?" Ruby pointed out the good aspects of their situation, and Belle sighed heavily, hating that Ruby outthought her.

"Fine," she concede reluctantly.

"Great. I'll see you soon, Babe. Love you." She truly sounded relieved, and Belle smacked away her paranoia. Ruby was strong. Emma's body was strong. Eva understood this issue far better than she.

"I love you, too," she said, unsure what else to say and ended the call.

"What's wrong?" Snow asked from the doorway of the kitchen, looking properly shamed and angst-ridden. Granny most definitely sunk claws into her.

"I think Ruby and Katy made up," she deadpanned, unable to take her eyes from the cellular device in her hand, confused and shocked.

"Isn't that a good thing?"

"Unless they're being nice because they're plotting each other's murder," Belle tried to joke, but the reality of that statement sank in slowly and blew air across the smoldering coals of fear and worry in her heart. She and Snow made eye contact and chuckled, both clearly thinking the same thing.

"No word on Emma and Regina?" Snow asked, changing the subject for the moment.

Belle shook her head and crossed her arms over her stomach again, supporting her breasts with her forearms. Swallowing the excess saliva in her mouth, she simply stared at the light-colored hardwood floor with Snow. Everything she'd said earlier, though correct, had been out of line. Who was she to judge Snow's methods as a mother? Her track record showed a less-than-promising string of mistakes.

"You weren't wrong, Belle," Snow finally murmured. "I just didn't know how to tell her. Our son is not a replacement for her, a do-over as you put it, but we did miss out on the joys and horrors of raising a child."

"Snow, you needn't explain yourself to me. I've made more than enough mistakes as a mother. I suppose you truly need to experience it to know the reasons behind the actions when children are involved. That's perhaps the hardest lesson in life, to realize that your parents aren't perfect." Her parents certainly left much to be desired. Even as wonderful as Snow's father treated her, he still abused Regina, still forced her into a marriage she never wanted, forced her and other servants under his immediate purview sexually.

Their thoughts synced, and both women fell silent once more, lost in their thoughts. Belle sighed deeply and stared at the floor as her body seemed to float above her, staring down upon her carefully blank expression and excessively salivating mouth. She swallowed again.

"My mother killed herself," she admitted without actually meaning to say the words – to Snow White of all people.

"Oh, Belle, I'm so sorry," the princess gushed compassionately.

The librarian shrugged, tightening her arms about her ribs. "After Bethany was born, she changed. I suppose her mind simply couldn't handle the thought of motherhood any longer. I have a history of depression and other major emotional disorders. Do you think I'll try to harm my children?" She raised her eyes to find Snow's big, doe-y, empathetic eyes studying her.

"Belle, this world offers far more support for women than The Enchanted Forest could have possibly dreamed of. Archie and Astrid will understand, not to mention, you have three of the strongest women I've ever met with you every single day. Even if you suffer from infant-detachment… what's it called in this world?"

She searched her mind for a moment. "Postpartum Depression?" Belle nodded. "Even if that happens, no one is going to let you harm yourself or your children."

"Do you think so?" Belle asked, more reassured than she cared to admit by Snow's presence. 20 minutes ago, she ripped into her. Now, all she wanted to do was hug her, substituting Snow's maternal attention for Regina's. She pressed her palms to her cheeks, patting away the wetness, wiping drool from the sides of her mouth. She hadn't felt sick in a while, why was there so much saliva?

Snow smiled kindly at the display of insecurity and nodded. "I know so," she answered in true optimistic fashion.

"Thank you," Belle whispered towards the floor. Snow knew them better than they liked to admit, and as much as it irritated her, she found comfort in it that moment.

"Does Ruby know?"

Belle shrugged and turned her gaze towards the streaks of sunlight filtering through the small windows on either side of the front door. "I suppose she does now. Regina's apparently always known," she answered, angry and grateful at the same time.

"The Evil Queen used it against you?" Snow asked, but the answer already shone in her eyes. Belle nodded anyway. "She must have felt incredibly threatened to bite that hard."

Belle exhaled audibly through her nose and nodded again. "She sensed the wolf magic in me before I even realized it had changed." Tucking hair behind her ear, she met Snow's eyes again. "That's why I'm here instead of searching for them with Ruby. We both know that Regina will not hurt her children, no matter which Regina we get."

"Are you strong enough to stop her?" Snow sounded more worried than surprised.

"I'm strong enough to kill her," Belle answered honestly, not even flinching at the ticking bomb of information she dropped between them.

"Belle," Snow breathed, clearly blown away by the calmness of the words.

"Regina and I understand each other, Snow, in a way you couldn't possibly fathom. She'd do the same for me if I lost control again, and I'll be damned if I allow her soul to blacken all over again because of my own weaknesses. Magic will never own either of us as long as the other lives." Belle dropped her gaze once more, steeling herself against the burn of tears in her throat. Saliva gushed into her mouth, and she swallowed twice, clearing the excessive moisture and ache of emotion. Her fingers turned into gentle claws protectively pawing at her tummy.

"How far are you?" Snow asked suddenly, and Belle smiled gratefully at the changed of conversation to something much happier.

"About eight weeks." She smiled stupidly and wrapped her hands around her belly. "I'm going to start really showing in a few weeks. Twins are incredibly hard on the mother's body."

"I think all babies are hard on the mother's body," Snow laughed and covered her own stomach.

Belle chuckled, choked on the excess spit in her mouth, and swallowed quickly. Snow covered her mouth as Belle slurped at the excess, wiping at her lips with the back of her hand. "Belle, I'm sorry."

"What?" Belle demanded, catching the extra drool.

"Excessive drooling can be a symptom of pregnancy, something to do with hormones, I think." Snow answered, more than a little surprised that she knew something Belle hadn't.

"You're kidding," Belle deadpanned, truly shocked. She swallowed again, already frustrated. Snow shook her head and covered her mouth, though her pinched and reddening face belied the laughter behind her hand.

Belle glared at her and then at the phone in her hand when it suddenly blared an obnoxious ringtone. It took a moment, but it finally registered in her big brain who exactly called her. "Oh my god, it's Ruby's phone." She punched at the buttons with shaking fingers. "Emma!" She yelled into the speaker, pressing the warm device to her head hard enough to hurt her ear.

"Belle, I need you to come get me," Emma said on the other end. "Something's wrong with me. I'm in the forest somewhere near the park, I think."

"Alright, Emma, stay put. I'm coming for you. Where is Regina?" Belle asked, already moving towards the living room, determined and slurping spit. Granny met her at the doorway, already up to speed on the situation.

"I'm not sure, but she has Rumpelstiltskin with her. She said that she needed him for protection where she was going. Belle, come and get me. We have to find her before she does something we can't fix," Emma yelled, clearly using the reserves of her strength to get her desperate point across.

"Ruby said that Batch mentioned seeing Rumpelstiltskin at the barn," Belle finally stuck all the pieces together. They were all idiots. More important things required their energy than a time portal no one really knew how to close.

"Zelena's portal," Emma rasped on the end, devastated, not even bothering to ask who Batch was. "Belle, come get me now! I'll start walking towards the park, just start there and work your way to me."

The call ended, and Belle shoved the phone into the tight leather pants around her hips. "Granny," she breathed, and the old woman nodded.

"Go get Emma. I'll make sure everyone is safe," she promised, already shoving the other woman towards the door, symbolically of course because Belle tapped into the new flow of magic in her veins and disappeared in a sparkling red haze of wolf magic.


	24. For the Love of a Daughter

Whooo, almost there, Doves. Thank you for the reviews and new follows! Enjoy.

Songs: Too Many to Mend by Libby Weaver, For the Love of a Daughter by Demi Lovato

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><p>Emma wiped at her forehead again and hunkered beneath the blanket Regina had provided. She felt fine when Regina disappeared into the cave, but like a magical flu, she shivered once about 30 minutes ago and hadn't stopped since. She checked her phone again, not surprised that the cell tower failed to reach her device in the cave. Disgusted, Emma tossed it onto the damp sand and leaned against the cool rock behind her. It felt wonderful. She kicked the blanket off, gasping from the sudden rush of cool air surrounding her body.<p>

"Regina," she called into the darkness, but only the echo of Ruby's voice answered.

If she were honest, symptoms of a fever concerned her less than the wild images flashing through her mind. The experienced felt totally surreal. She remembered not remembering her life, and now those events she'd sought so desperately to recover left her raw and aching. Huge gaps omitted Regina's presence, others disappeared completely. Neverland felt like a dream. The pain of the machine prickled beneath her skin. Pan's condescending laughter echoed in her ears. Zelena's neck snapped and cracked in her hands, reminding her of what had been taken from Regina. She shivered, rattling her shackles.

"Regina, something's wrong," she tried again, hoping the other woman cared enough to answer.

Emma grabbed the chains above her head and yanked with the remainder of Ruby's wolf strength. The cold metal held strong to the wall, not giving a centimeter to the supernatural tug of wolf strength. She tried again, face flushing with the strain of pulling against an unmovable object.

"Calm yourself, Savior," Regina's calm voice cut through the darkness. She sounded tired, defeated. The reason explained itself when she stepped into the dim light with Rumpelstiltskin at her side, his dagger in her hand. Emma's heart dropped into her belly like a brick.

"Regina, you don't need him," she started, but without her memories failed to find a good reason why he spelled danger for Regina. Whatever he'd done to her had broken her spirit, she knew that much, felt it in the anger that rolled from the imp. "Regina, please," she breathed, her voice barely constituting a whisper. With a surge of strength, Emma used the chains to haul Ruby's slight weight to her feet, swaying in her dizziness.

"If you wish to save yourself and the wolf, you must go to the hospital and allow Eva and Lauren to care for you. Your soul is poisoning this body," Regina explained calmly. A front, Emma realized. Just as she cast the curse to run from the mess she'd created for herself in the Enchanted Forest, Regina ran away from everyone again, this time protecting them from her dark side.

"Regina, don't do this," Emma begged, leaning heavily on the wall for support of her quivering body. "Whatever you're thinking, don't do this, especially with him."

Regina picked up Emma's phone and placed it gently into her hand. Emma stared down at the device, Regina's trembling fingers lingering on the sandy screen. "As long as I hold his dagger, I will be protected." She stepped back and flicked her wrist. A muscle in her neck jumped when Emma nearly fell over as the shackles released her wrists and took away the extra support of the chains.

"Follow that tunnel." She tipped her chin toward an opening in the darkness. "It will lead you to the surface."

"Regina," Emma called after her as she turned from her. "Regina, look at me. I know you still feel it. I know you feel me!" She surged forward, fell onto her hands and knees. "Regina, you don't have to run." The sorceress stiffened but never looked back. "Regina, stay with me. I'll protect you."

Regina bowed her head, and Emma thought for a moment that she'd finally broken through that thick stubbornness. "Emma, you're far better without memories of what I could have never given you," Regina whispered, wet and raspy with tears.

A sharp cry followed the thick haze of smoke, and Emma only realized it had come from her throat when a sudden dry ache followed. "Regina!" She yelled, but only Ruby's voice answered her call once more.

Gathering the resolve of Ruby's wolf endurance, she pushed to her feet and used the wall to support the trek towards the surface. She switched the flashlight of her cell phone on and followed the small light blue beam on the sand. Amelia believed their love capable of breaking the memory spell, and the tug in Emma's soul confirmed it. Regina felt it, too, even as The Evil Queen. More like the broken queen.

Stumbling, she caught herself on both hands, apparently still clumsy with the grace of Ruby's wolf assisting her. It felt familiar, and Emma allowed the feeling to spur her forward. Grabbing the phone, she forced Ruby's exhausted body to those agile feet and fumbled forward with the sheer force of her willpower. She refused to let Regina go without a fight. The woman held so much hurt in her eyes, so much pain. Her child-like behavior when Emma cleaned her wound spoke to the amount of suffering she'd actually endured as a child. How odd to think they'd switched places. Regina had mothered her and loved her and tended her wounds and distracted her from the pain. Had anyone ever done that for Regina until that morning in a damp, dirty cave with fireballs floating above their heads and shackles on her wrists?

She would, Emma vowed. Everyone slathered attention upon her because of her memory loss, but they'd not blinked at Regina's pain. Emma blinked, Emma cared, Emma promised to take it away, to kiss every inch of her body until Regina felt nothing but loved. She deserved to be treated like a queen after the hell she'd put her through, even if unintentional. Even when she'd behaved as The Evil Queen, they brushed it away, believing it to be a normal reaction. None of them truly knew Regina.

The anger dulled the pain of adrenaline in her veins. It hurt. Everything hurt. Ruby's body shut down slowly. She caught herself on the wall, barely feeling the jagged rock slice into the palm of her hand. This felt familiar. She'd saved Regina before, in the dark, and it hurt… a lot. Why couldn't she remember? It was right – fucking – there. Right there, locked behind a steel wall of memory potion, hidden from her mind but not her heart. She believed when no one else had, then, and she believed now. Beyond all reason, she had fought and scraped and grieved for the love that needed to be found then, and now felt no differently.

"Just hold on, Regina. I'll make things better. I'll take you to the cabin and watch The Golden Girls with you without complaining. Just hold on for me," she pleaded with her absent wife as though she might have actually heard her.

Anger swelled at her negligence, and Emma screamed in frustration and pushed from the wall once more, following the faint light that waited for her another quarter mile up a steep incline. It was tiny, almost like it'd been covered over with something. How the hell had Regina found this place? The closer she pushed towards the light, the smaller the cave became until she tucked the phone into her back pocket and crawled on hands and knees. The final piece, she shimmied on her belly, clawing at the earth, digging in with her toes. Rocks and dirt bit and pulled at Ruby's exposed chest, scratching and caking against the already marred skin. She had seen what Ruby's body was capable of and pushed it to the limits of the wolf's strength waning in her muscles.

"Move damn it!" She yelled at the protesting limbs, winded from the delirious dash to the entrance. With a thrust of her powerful legs, her head and torso burst through the tiny hole at the entrance of the cave.

Thankful that Ruby's tiny body slipped easily through the opening, Emma laid on the soft dirt and moss, lower half still in the hole. After three deep breaths of fresh air, she wiggled out of the hole and dug for the phone even as she toppled to the earth. She almost called Ruby, remember that she was in the hospital, and punched Belle's number.

She clamped her eyes shut against the bright warm sun filtering through the patch of pines surrounding the cave entrance. Her keen wolf senses immediately searched for a reference point as the call rang through. In the distance, children played and a stream trickled. The scent of people and food rolled towards her from the West. The park. Intuitively, she knew which way to go and trusted Ruby's wolf to lead her successfully from the forest, more connected than she'd ever been to the earth.

"Emma!" Belle's relieved voice filtered through the dirt-caked speaker.

"Belle, I need you to come get me," Emma demanded, just as relieved as the librarian. Her head spun as she tried to stand, so she laid still for another moment. "Something's wrong with me. I'm in the forest somewhere near the park, I think."

"Alright, Emma, stay put. I'm coming for you. Where is Regina?" Belle asked, and tears sprang to Emma's eyes at the concern in Belle's voice. They were with her this time. They weren't giving up on Regina.

"I'm not sure, but she has Rumpelstiltskin with her. She said that she needed him for protection where she was going. Belle, come and get me. We have to find her before she does something we can't fix," Emma yelled and rolled onto her knees and elbows. She needed to move, needed to find a place that Belle recognized and could teleport to without risk of injury.

"Ruby said that Batch mentioned seeing Rumpelstiltskin at the barn," Belle finally stuck all the pieces together. Emma's heart clenched, and she used the emotional pain to bring her to her feet and staggered forward.

"Zelena's portal. Belle, come get me now! I'll start walking towards the park, just start there and work your way to me," The Savior suggested and ended the call before Belle over-analyzed the situation with her giant brain.

Belle would come. She moved, one foot in front of the other, towards the sound of the park. Stumbled, screamed, picked herself up. If anyone happened upon her in those moment, they'd have thought Ruby had gone completely mad.

"Emma," that beautifully familiar, accented voice called to her.

She bent over, holding her weight with locked elbows on her knees. "Belle," she rasped. Raising her head slightly, she watched the tiny woman climb the slight incline with a speed and agility she'd not expected, especially in leather pants.

"Emma," the librarian repeated as she reached her, slightly winded. She ducked beneath her arm and held her upright with a hand around Ruby's thin waist. "Hold on. Teleportation is difficult on a body. You may end up on the other side unconscious. I'm uncertain how soul poisoning will affect…"

"Belle!" Emma yelled, silencing the anxious woman in the middle of an intellectual rant. "Just do it," she ordered, voice haggard and raspy.

Belle spit an obscene amount of saliva onto the ground, already tapping into the magic. The gesture looked so wrong coming from the prim and proper woman that Emma really had only met a few days prior. Belle shrugged at the surprised stare, and then they flew apart on a molecular level. Unlike the chalkiness of Regina's Dark Magic or the desert quality of Belle's Earth Magic or Emma's obnoxiously lilac-scented power, Wolf Magic smelled of fresh dirt, the sweetness of a full freshwater stream. It comforted the wolf body Emma inhabited, pulled her closer to the woman gripping her ribs painfully.

The moment they pulled together, Belle released the hold, and Emma fell to the ground to recover. The librarian sprinted towards the two figures already alert to their presence. Emma watched, the world moving in slow motion as Belle ducked a fireball and rolled onto her feet again. She returned one of her own and spun perfectly on the toe of her boot, narrowly dodging the second attack as her own flew towards the two powerful magic wielders.

The protective barrier that Belle erected around the portal had already fallen.

Rumpelstiltskin flew into the wall of the old barn. Regina sneered and Belle returned it. Emma watched it all fall down around her.

"Stop," she whispered, too weak for a more forceful command. All of them needed to go home, or none of them survived.

Belle skidded to a stop and returned fired once more, taking a more precise aim at her sister witch. Regina deflected the stream of magic with one of her own, recreating the thunderous crack that they'd heard the previous night in the mansion. Belle recovered first, wild determination and grief in her eyes. Regina spun bodily as the magic slammed into her chest. Her body cracked and thumped, stirring dust as it landing roughly.

"No!" Emma yelled and pushed to her feet.

Belle startled at the sudden movement and loud voice. A fireball crashed into her shoulder, giving her body the same agonizing treatment as Regina who still laid on the ground despite the return fire. Emma stepped between the two women, bouncing to a stop with her hands outstretched. Venomous hatred burned in Regina's dark eyes, too scared and threatened to stop, too close to what she truly wanted. An escape.

"Regina," Emma whispered and then dropped to the ground to avoid the powerful energy surging towards her head.

"Enough!" A familiar yet unexpected voice called to them. All three prone and aching women glanced up to see Granny tromping towards them. Ruby laid on the ground a good distance behind her, safely away from the immediate danger zone.

The elder Lucas strode directly in between her fighting daughters, unflinchingly staring down the eldest now on her feet again. "Enough," she repeated more quietly but no less firmly.

"Out of my way, old woman," Regina seethed, pulling a tight fireball into her palm. Belle reacted behind Emma, raising one of her own. Emma held up a hand that indicated for Belle to wait.

"Do you remember the day before you cast the curse, Child?" Granny said calmly, tenderly. "You came to me and told me not to be afraid because you promised to never separate me and Ruby. Do you remember?" Regina stiffened. Pain slowly eclipsed the anger in her eyes, but still the fireball held strong. Of course Granny broke through. She's the only person alive who had loved Regina in every stage of her life – child, broken queen, Evil Queen, tyrant, mayor, mother, child, sister.

"You don't have to fight anymore, my beautiful girl. My daughter," Granny declared proudly, unwavering in her stance against The Evil Queen. "My daughter," she repeated, a hint of tears in her strong voice.

The change happened almost instantly, the switch from evil to good within one woman. "Granny," Regina choked. Rumpelstiltskin's dagger fell to the ground first.

Belle stretched her arm towards the dangerous instrument, calling it to her hand in a moment. "Leave us," she ordered softly, and The Dark One disappeared.

Granny stepped towards Regina cautiously, more afraid to spook the woman than spooked herself. "The war is over, Baby," Granny cooed to the daughter that had replaced her own many years before Ruby came tripping along.

"It hurts," Regina confessed, touched her burned chest, jerked her hand away.

"I know," Granny empathized. "I miss Emma, too, if you can believe that. This isn't the answer. She's right there waiting for you to love her, Regina. Look at her."

Regina listened. Shimmering caramel eyes met the chocolate brown of the body her wife wore. "She's right there, Baby, fighting for you as she's always done. Why aren't you fighting for her?" The question blasted through the last battlement and kicked open Regina's emotional gates.

"I can't," she cried, head lowered in shame.

"Then fight for Henry and Annabel and Katy. They need you, Regina." She touched the broken woman's injured shoulders and murmured, "I need you," so softly that Emma might have lost the words if not for Ruby's superior hearing.

"I can't lose another daughter. I almost died when Anita left. In my soul, Regina, I almost died. You saved me, with that tiny gap you used to have between your teeth and that little chuckle that meant you'd done something you shouldn't have. Do you understand, Child? You saved me. Let me save you." They lowered as one to the ground, Regina sobbing heavily into Granny's abundant bosom. She spoke, but the words got lost in the indecipherable rasp and choke of violent tears.

Granny glanced at Belle. "Get those idiots to the hospital and get yourself looked at. I'm not losing any more daughters this day." Shameless tears dripped onto her cheeks, tears held far too long in her heart.

Belle nodded but simply stared at the surreal scene of Granny and Regina sobbing together. Emma took Belle's hand, and together, they climbed to their feet. Emma tossed her arm over her shoulders, leaning heavily on the smaller woman. Ruby never bothered to stand up from her place on the ground, legs sprawled haphazardly from the crash landing she brought upon them in her delirium. Emma and Belle followed her gaze to the other two women up the slight incline in front of the barn. Regina pulled back and said something to the woman who had become her mother, and Granny wiped her tears before pulling the sorceress back to her bosom, hand petting her hair lovingly.

"Ruby," Belle murmured. "I think it's time to forgive Jack." Neither of them tore their eyes from the scene above them.

"It's time to forgive a lot of people," Ruby answered. Her thoughts drifted to the young girl who'd carried her to the hospital and refused to leave her side, even as she screamed in agony from the chi Lauren forced into her body… enough to get her to the mansion and teleport here with Granny. She felt just as weak as she had before the infusion.

"Belle, will you call David and Snow when we get to the hospital?" Emma asked, just as absently and heartfelt as the previous two statements, attention split between her own needs and the scene playing out before them.

"I'll have her bring our children," Belle answered and tightened her grip around Emma's waist.

"Alex," Ruby whispered harshly as though she'd just remembered the little girl who held her heart in those tiny, mischievous hands. "Belle, we have to do better."

"We will," Belle promised. She spit again, receiving the same incredulous looks as before. "I'll explain later," she brushed away their shock and tugged on her magic as she handed Ruby the dagger and took her other hand.

"Let's go make things right," Belle said, determined, and glanced between them to indicate their bodies. "We've lost enough."

They flew apart in a red swirl of neon energy and left mother and daughter to grieve in the comforting embrace only they understood.


	25. Fight Another Day

Okay, my dears, this is not something that you can rush through and expect to understand completely. It's pretty dense, so take your time with it to avoid confusion later on.

Songs: Gift of a Friend by Demi Lovato, Rain by Patty Griffin

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><p>Ruby and Emma laid side by side in the hospital bed, hands clasped tightly between them. Belle sat near Emma's body with Ruby's soul while Eva dabbed at her injured chest. Snow and David stood near the door with Annabel while Alex climbed all over Batch's bed and Katy kept her from injuring the wolf more. Lauren and Amelia worked on a potion in the basement. Bethany and Henry read quietly in the corner. No one spoke. Either worry for Regina or a general wandering of their own minds kept the words from their lips.<p>

Emma squeezed Ruby's hand and turned her head slightly to look at the woman wearing her skin. "Hey Rubes," she said softly and squirmed a little on the bed, trying to get comfortable.

"What?" Ruby asked, not bothering to turn her head or open her eyes. "Quit wiggling," she sniped.

"I really hope Lauren and Eva can switch our bodies back when that potion is done," Emma answered the question and wriggled on the bed again. "There is dirt in cracks you never knew you had." Emma explained her inability to lay still.

"I hate you," Ruby deadpanned, but a hint of a smile tugged at her lips.

Emma laughed, surprising everyone when the sound infected them with a sliver of respite from the anticipatory anxiety of waiting for an update on Regina. "You did a striptease in my body in front of half the town. This is only the beginning of payback."

"Oh come on," Ruby laughed. "That was funny. I thought Snow's head was going to explode." They all chuckled at the princess' expense. "Did you see how red her face got?" They laughed again, including Emma and Snow.

"Wait, Aunt Ruby did a striptease in Ma's body?" Henry asked, more than a little mortified at the thought of his mother like that.

Katy covered Alex's ears, but she and Batch shared an amused look that almost reached their mouths. Katy snickered. "I suppose that's actually less embarrassing than everyone thinking that Emma blew up the frozen section at the grocery store for no reason."

Emma groaned, everyone else laughed. "Rubes, you've had my body for five days, and my reputation is destroyed."

"I'm fairly certain that's a truth for all of us," Belle interjected. "Sorry, Emma, but I think the town also believes we're having an affair now." Not that she'd had much of one when she'd bolted from Storybrooke just over two months ago. Everyone knew her soul blackened as horrendously as Regina's.

"What?" Emma shot out of the bed. Belle shrugged sheepishly and then spit into a trashcan, the bag rattling with the obscene amount. "And that is fucking gross, Belle. Seriously, how long is your spit thing going to last?"

"It usually only lasts a couple of weeks," Eva supplied distractedly without raising her eyes from Belle's chest. "But for some women, it's possible to last the entire pregnancy." Her head jerked at the cacophonous protestation of nearly everyone in the room. "Hey, fine, ask Addison if you think I'm joking. Personally, I think it'd do you some good," she bit towards Belle.

Belle's jaw unhinged, and saliva dribbled onto her chin. She growled, wiped her chin, and spat again. "Are you saying that I talk too much, Eva?" Belle demanded, offended in the haughty way only a former princess could have been.

"I'm certain my medical staff will be much more comfortable working on a patient who doesn't tell them how to do their jobs," Eva explained nonchalantly, back to her usual spikey self now that all secrets had surfaced.

Belle scowled, but Eva continued working, unscathed. "Scowl all you want, princess, but I can read your thoughts and emotions, remember? You may punch me for keeping my secret after I've finished. You know I'd never have endangered them beyond salvation," Eva clarified for everyone the exact intentions rumbling through Belle's exhaustingly cycling mind. The woman ran an intellectual decathlon.

"I hate chi readers," Belle declared.

"Mama, don't hit Zambie," Alex begged from Batch's bed.

"I'm not going to hit anyone, Baby," Belle clarified for her daughter who had seen far too much violence in her very short life. Alex climbed into Katy's lap and settled down to study her mother. The wounded expression jerked at her heart, and Belle wondered exactly what Ruby had meant when she said they'd have to do better. What horrors stalked that tiny mind just behind the smiles and endless list of questions?

"Hey, got room for two more in here?" Lauren asked from the door, breaking the tension that descended upon them. Amelia leaned on her heavily, looking drowsy and as sickly as Ruby and Emma. Batch tensed again at the new arrival. She trusted Lauren but hadn't met Amelia yet. She remained quite calm and placid considering the amount of people in her room, but sometimes, it felt nice to simply be included in something. Katy touched her hand, and the wolf laced their fingers together immediately in a vice.

"Hey, Miss Kitty," Emma greeted warmly as Lauren deposited the neurosurgeon into a chair by her head.

"Hey, Marshall, any news on Regina?" She asked quietly, and Emma found the strength to open her eyes.

"No, but Granny would have called at the first sign of trouble, so at this point, no news is the best news we have. Who'd have thought Granny would show us all up in the white horse category," Emma tried to keep her tone light, but a sliver of failure poked through anyway. They'd all failed Regina. Granny saw. Well, Amelia saw it, too, but she'd offered Regina the easy fix, the magically solution to a problem that required spiritual guidance and an emotional crutch. She meant well.

"Granny's always been a hero to me," Henry piped up in defense of the woman who had brought him back from the edge of self-destruction after he'd recovered the memories of Belle's war for Storybrooke.

"Me too, Kiddo," Ruby agreed with a nostalgic and appreciative smile on her lips. Everyone fell silent once more, slaves to their individual emotional turmoil.

Emma fidgeted in the silence, unable to cope. She needed distraction from the risky procedure Eva and Lauren intended to perform on them to set them right. "Happy news: my sordid affair with you is no longer the talk of the town," she joked to Amelia.

"Okay," Amelia deadpanned, not quite sure what to do with the information.

"Oh yeah, Emma and my fiancée are a thing now," Ruby clarified, amusement in her voice.

"Okay, so going back to that, Belle, why exactly do you believe the town thinks we're banging behind the wolf's back… who could smell me on you a mile away?" Emma queried, facetious. She tried to find some indignant anger towards the full story, but none surfaced. Who really gave a frilly fuck what this town thought after all the times they'd turned against them when they'd sacrificed everything, even their sanity, in order to save them?

Belle's ears turned red and Ruby stiffened tellingly beside her. Belle spit again, and Amelia gagged. "I cut into people's brains for a living, and that is seriously gross."

Belle cleared her throat, ignoring the neurosurgeon. "Ruby and I may or may not have also been discovered… ummm, in a compromising position near the stock room by Stephanie Lockly who works the checkout counter on weekends."

Emma slapped a hand over her face and groaned, "That's like telling Leroy. Terrible news, The Savior has strayed again!" She yelled in her best Leroy impression, which sounded horrible with Ruby's softer, higher-pitched voice.

Amelia chuckled and took Emma's hand away from her face and held it in both of hers. "Want to go spread one about me and Ruby? I mean, fair is fair, right? She did do a striptease in your body."

"One time. You dance on a bar one time and you never live it down," Ruby exclaimed, but laughter rumbled beneath the words. With the back of her hand, Belle smacked her shoulder from all of them. "Don't worry, Baby, I'll do one for you, too," Ruby promised, eyes opening long enough to wink at her lover.

"Seriously?" Katy and Henry blurted at the same time, mixtures of disgust and astonishment on their faces. From Belle, they expected those offhanded comments, but Ruby generally felt too self-conscious to say anything beyond a whisper in Belle's ear in front of them.

"Preferably in your own body," Belle brought them back to the situation at hand with a firm voice and pointed looked to the two unnerved teens. "Are you confident you can switch them back with the potion Furhan's seer created?" All attention trained on the succubus.

Lauren sighed and nodded, smoothing back her jet black hair. "I think there is a chance. I need to rest first. I've never channeled the entire chi of another person in me before, especially one as powerful as Ruby and Emma's. I'm not even sure that I can without killing myself."

"How can we help?" Bethany asked, finally making her presence known. She lapped up Lauren and Eva's attention like a big puppy who had been abandoned in the pound and finally found her new owners. The two chi wielders had spent a considerable amount of time with her since the switch occurred, since she and Belle were the only two people they knew who could read most of the languages in the library. No wonder Regina kept the library on lockdown for 28 years, she'd brought so many magical tomes.

"Honestly? I don't know," Lauren admitted. Eva touched her hand, and the succubus flinched, self-conscious of her missing finger. Another wound that healed physically without any emotional closure. The seer dropped her hand and returned to her work on Belle's chest as though the moment never happened. The wall between them had grown insurmountably. They loved each other, that much remained clear, but the pain… Eva attacked them with her powers, something Lauren stood firmly against. Sure, it cracked everything wide open, but it betrayed everything she thought they'd stood for, believed in without faltering. Eva faltered.

"Could you absorb some of our chi to make yourself stronger?" Bethany suggested, ever clueless to the emotional moment that passed before her eyes. Belle smiled fondly at the young woman who reminded her so much of herself when she'd first arrived in this world. Her sister lived. Sure, she'd grown up from that tiny thing that tripped over her lacy dresses and chased after her big sister every waking moment of the day… and a few sleepless nights during thunderstorms or nightmares when she crawled into her bed. Had Bethany retained her fear of storms all these years? Belle felt a sudden, inexplicable need to know.

Lauren nodded. "That would help," she agreed with a slight smile towards the young woman. As annoying as they all perceived Bethany, the girl only wanted a family like the rest of them.

Everyone jumped in surprise when Batch shifted on her bed, the whining of electronics bringing her upright. The young wolf hadn't spoken two words since the Swan-Lucas-French-Charming crew invaded her previous quiet hospital room, but Katy's presence continued to soothe her. She'd even thrown Katy's phone back to the sink when something buzzed and obviously upset the young woman who refused to leave her side for no reason except to keep her silent company. She'd stayed involved, though. Her keen eyes and ears absorbed everything from names to tiny little bits of fluff to painfully intimate details that they'd revealed, already accepting the energy of her presence as nonthreatening and, perhaps, inevitable.

She held out her hand to Lauren, eyes shifting self-consciously around the room. Lauren took her hand without pulling on her chi and held it to her chest as she stepped closer to the bed. With the other, she smoothed the girl's hair and smiled fondly at the bravery shining in her bright blue eyes.

"You're hurt, Batch. You need your strength to recover," she said softly in a tone that let the wolf know how appreciated her offer was.

"Wolf," Batch argued and touched her chest with the hand half covered in a cast. She knew just how strong she was. Ruby opened her eyes and met the icy blue of the young wolf who seemed to be awaiting her reaction. Batch nodded at her, an understanding passing between them. She needed to prove herself just as Ruby had, prove she wasn't evil. She deferred to the closest alpha, Ruby realized, and adrenaline zinged through her. With a deep breath, she accepted the responsibility onto her already full shoulders.

"Lauren, just take a little," Ruby encouraged the succubus.

Lauren glanced between the two wolves, smart enough to realize something deeper than her indecision occurred, and opened up her mind to accept the new energy. Batch gasped, and Lauren grinned as the tingling anger of the wolf filled her veins. "My god, I'd love to…" Lauren dropped the girl's hand quickly and stepped back, clearing her throat. "I'm sorry, that was inappropriate," she mumbled quickly to the young wolf who shrugged and laid in the bed, eyes already closing in exhaustion.

"You wouldn't be interested in switching bodies with me for a night, would you Lauren?" Belle ribbed the nurse mercilessly.

"Lauren, you can totally suck my chi and get a high when I get my body back. I thinks it's kind of flattering that a wolf can give you a special kind of kick," Ruby offered, wiggling her eyebrows lasciviously, which might have actually been slightly alluring if not for the pallid texture of her skin and greasy hair from the fever sweats.

Arms circled around Lauren's waist, and Bethany peaked over her shoulder. "Will my energy produce such a high?" Jaws dropped all around. Apparently, sexuality ran in the French family. Eva smacked the bottom Belle's chin when drool dripped onto her gloved hand. Belle spit and watched her little sister join the good mood that seemed to have found them. They survived.

"I'm flattered, Bethany, but I need you on that book," Lauren answered just as lasciviously. "Chi sucking can have unpredictable side effects. Exhaustion, sleepiness, delirium in some case." She cleared her throat and rubbed the length of Bethany's arm beguilingly with the tips of her fingers, settling into the good-natured flirting between the other female members of their group. "Other responses in other cases," she explained in an intentionally husky voice.

"Ow! Eva," Belle yelled when the seer ripped at a piece of skin far more roughly than necessary. She glared down at the surgeon, but Eva gave no expression that revealed her inner emotions, least of all guilt for hurting her.

"Nice to know you still care, Darling," Lauren mumbled and pushed Bethany away gently, letting the younger woman know the reaction spawned from nothing she'd done.

"Nice to know your blood still moves," Eva snapped back.

"Excuse me if the first thing I don't want to do after a crisis is jump into bed after watching…" She stopped abruptly, her eyes shifting to Katy's empathetically. Katy smiled sadly. Lauren had given her hope in that hellhole. She'd only loved her, never judged her, told her that the abuse wasn't her fault. Lauren's kind green eyes held hers lovingly, unflinchingly, as Ben raped her. Of course the effects of that lingered.

"What?" Eva snapped, not noticing the shared pain between the succubus and the young warrior. Apparently, Lauren blocked the memories from Eva's view.

Lauren shook her head, dropping her gaze. "Nothing," she murmured, suddenly hyperaware of the room full of eyes upon her.

"Shit," Amelia breathed and squeezed Emma's hand tighter, understanding the interaction perfectly. They'd known those two weeks probably created some of the worst memories of Lauren's life, but the guarded woman never spoke about it since her rescue, apparently not even to Eva.

"Who's next?" Lauren barked.

David stepped forward and wrapped the woman in a hug. "Take mine," he gave permission to cover the emotional support he offered freely. Lauren rested her head against his strong chest without returning the hug, but David's gasp told the room that she absorbed his excess energy without her hands. He stumbled backwards and caught himself on the wall when she turned abruptly.

"Lauren," Belle caught her attention and held out her hand.

"I don't want to risk your pups," the succubus passed on the largest source of energy in lieu of protecting the growing life within her. Belle nodded, frustrated but understanding.

Katy leaned over Batch's bed and stretched her hand towards the succubus. "Take as much as you need," she instructed. Lauren smiled sadly and sucked up the excess, leaving Katy pale and weak. She squeezed her hand for an extended moment and swallowed thickly as she allowed her connection with Katy to linger.

"Mine too," Henry offered his hand, and Lauren gasped a genuine laugh and graciously took the boy's hand but a very small amount of chi. Just enough to know that he'd done something.

"Mine too," a deep voice said from the door.

"Caleb," Amelia reacted first and pushed herself to her feet despite the obvious pain. Pinning that damn woman to a bed proved as difficult as keeping Ruby and Emma in one. "You came back," she breathed reverently, clearly not having expected the loyalty. The man accepted her weak body into his strong arms.

"Did you think I'd give up after one failed proposal?" He murmured into her hair with that adorable boyish grin beneath his scruffy beard. "That would sort of defeat the purpose of declaring my intention of spending the rest of my life with you, wouldn't it?"

Amelia laughed, wiped at her wet face, and punched his chest. "I'm sorry for being such an absolute terror the past two days, but the answer is still no," she confirmed.

"I know. I also know that your behavior wasn't about me but your fear for your friends, just took a few hours of driving around to realize it. I'm a patient man," he promised softly and kissed the side of head before guiding her back to the chair. "Now sit there before you tear something again." He offered one hand to Lauren and rubbed Amelia's back with the other. After a few minutes, he slumped into the wall and slid to the floor. Waving off their concern, he rested his head in Amelia's lap. She smiled down at him lovingly and ran trembling fingers through his thick dark hair.

"Remind me never to piss Lauren off," he grumbled with a healthy amount of respect in his voice. His expression, however, slowly loosened into one of blissful intoxication.

Amelia laughed. "I think that goes for all the women in this room," she teased, but the tears shimmering in her eyes told them all that Amelia's emotions stretched far deeper than the playfulness she displayed. She swallowed roughly and handed the potion to Lauren.

Katy flicked Henry's ear. "You should remember that statement above all else," she warned him. David nodded his head, confirming Katy's caution for the young teen. Poor kid needed more men in his life.

"Eva, are you ready?" Lauren asked without looking at her lover.

"Wait," Emma blurted. "We should wait for Regina and Granny. No offense, but just in case things go wrong." Emma tried to sound forceful, but the weakness of Ruby's body prevented that.

"There's no time," Eva clipped. "Clear the children, please. They don't need to see this." She left Belle's chest half-bandaged and pulled the purple latex from her hands. "I'll finish afterwards. Everyone out," she shooed them. After the first body switch, she left nothing up to fate, which meant everyone but she and Lauren left the room… and Batch in the other bed.

Bethany stayed put in the corner and pulled the dusty tome closer to her, but everyone else kissed Ruby and Emma and filtered into the hallway.

"Wait," Ruby said when Lauren closed the door behind the rest of their family. "I have one last request while Emma is in my body." When no one prodded or objected, she turned towards her friend. "I really need you to strip down naked and walk towards the bed. I really want to know what Belle sees when I walk towards her naked." Though made in jest, the rumbling of insecurity quaked in her eyes.

Emma laughed out loud, keeping the mood as light as possible. Ruby needed far more love and reassurance than anyone knew, maybe even Belle. "Maybe we should kiss, too, just to see what our lips feel like," she suggested jokingly.

Ruby shrugged. "We are the only two of our foursome who hasn't yet." She leaned towards Emma, eyes closed, intent on sealing the deal.

"Uhhh," Emma sputtered and put a hand in the middle of Ruby's chest. "I'll pass. I'm already having an affair with Amelia and Belle, no need to start one about you, too. Don't you think I'm a big enough hussy in the eyes of this town? No thanks to your little display," Emma reminded her, dark glee in her tone.

Ruby huffed and crossed her arms. "It was one dance. I'm sure you've done far worse."

"You put my jacket over Leroy's head, and then he left to go find Astrid," Emma deadpanned and crossed her own arms. "He's like my mother's first in command and now I keep imagining him singing the "Hi, Ho" song in a whole different light." The two laughed, leaning into each other for comfort from the scary procedure about to be performed on them.

"You all need couples therapy," Bethany muttered from the corner.

"What's that, Beth? Me and Belle?" Ruby asked, confused by the offhanded comment.

"No, all of you, the foursome of heroines who are more polyamorous than kings of The Bible," Bethany answered, amusement in her voice. Lauren laughed, and Eva snickered.

"You know, she's not that far off," Lauren backed up the theory. "We could leave you like this, and then you could each sample at your pleasure. Once they got hot and sweaty, too, they'd never notice the fever… though probably should keep Ruby away from flammable things when her magic explodes."

"I knew it," Ruby blurted, allowing the levity of the situation to alleviate her nerves. "You really do want Belle to murder me."

"She could probably drown you in the saliva she's creating," Bethany offered a jab at her sister's expense. A loud thump against the window startled all of them.

"I'm developing wolf senses," Belle yelled through the glass. "I can hear you, and I will defenestrate the next person who mentions my pregnancy," she threatened with a word her daughter undoubtedly couldn't have understood yet.

"What's that mean?" Emma whispered to Ruby who shrugged.

Bethany laughed. "It means to throw one out of a window," she supplied, enjoying the comradery and sisterly threat more than she should have in such a serious moment. Beth wasn't so bad, now that she'd begun becoming an actual person. Little pieces of her personality shone through a bit more each day as she stopped hiding behind her perfectly fixed hair and eloquent language. If her tireless effort to find the cure to their body swap indicated anything, she obviously carried her loyalty in high esteem. It reminded Emma of Belle's crusade to find a safe way to return the proper hearts to her and Regina.

"Okay, let's see if this kills me, shall we?" Lauren brought them all to center once more. "Eva, I think I'm going to pull Emma's energy first. She's weaker, so it should be less to hold." Lauren positioned herself at the foot of the bed and touched Emma's calf.

"Should we risk it, considering we need to break the spell?" Eva asked.

Lauren sighed, shook her head and handed Emma the potion. "What is it?" Emma asked, suddenly terrified once more. The succubus placed a hand on a calf of each woman.

"It's a sleeping potion," Eva supplied in her matter-of-fact way that usually comforted everyone. "I cannot risk sending you into a dreamscape so fragmented, that's asking for something to go awry, but I need your consciousness departed from Ruby's body in order to move it. Once you're asleep, Lauren will transfer Ruby's energy to the correct vessel and I will guide your consciousness while you sleep. Furhan's seer instructed that to be proper procedure, correct?" They all glanced towards Bethany who nodded.

"Is anyone else utterly perplexed by the amount of human experimentation the ancients performed?" Bethany blurted. "No wonder people are so afraid of magical beings." Emma and Ruby nodded, mouths too dry with fear to vocally endorse the young woman's concerns.

At Eva's irritated glare, Bethany stuck her nose in the book. "Once the potion has been consumed, another spirit form can be transferred to the vessel," she read from the book haltingly, translating as quickly as possible. "A chi-eater (that would be our resident succubus) may hold the life force of another in his or her mind and transfer such energies to a slumbering vessel." She stopped before reading the passage about the resulting death of the person a succubus or incubus drained. Lauren already knew the risks to her life force, and Emma and Ruby already resisted enough. That was one secret she felt comfortable keeping for the time being.

"Ruby, one more thing," Lauren said softly. "Once you're inside of me, we may… connect. Do you understand?" Ruby shook her head, too nervous to follow the subtle warning. Eva rolled her eyes, face flushing with anger towards Lauren's absolute need to make everyone completely aware of the effects of her powers.

"It means that we may share a connection similar to the one you felt when you carried Belle's heart. You may see my memories, hear my thoughts, or feel my emotions. I'm not absorbing your energy, I'm literally housing two souls in one body, and according to that book, my powers work similarly to that of a soul seer's. The difference being our connection will create a sort of two-way street between us. It might linger for a few days, maybe a few years, it may never go away, which means when we touch physically, the connection will reopen. Do you understand?"

Ruby nodded. "This way is safer than sending us back into a dreamscape?"

"Yes," Eva answered. "We have more control with this method, and eliminate the risk of fracturing your souls further by traveling from the realm of reality to that of dreams. The risk, in this case, is not to your souls but your bodies, which is why we have all the necessary equipment to revive you at the ready." Eva nodded towards the machines between the two beds – shock panels, syringes of epinephrine, intubation kits.

"Do you wish to proceed, Ruby?" Lauren asked, upholding the moral responsibility she'd placed upon herself.

"I'd rather go my life without hugging you than miss the chance to see my kids grow up," Ruby justified creating such a connection with anyone but Belle.

Lauren nodded and squeezed her calf, comforting her. "Whatever I see, hear, or feel shall remain between us. I'm trusting you to allot me the same courtesy."

"Of course, Lauren. That's not even a question here," Ruby answered sincerely and encouraged the nervous succubus with a kind tiny grin. "Let's do this."

Emma snagged Ruby's hand, lacing their fingers together. She met the wolf's encouraging eyes, took a deep breath, and downed the potion. As Emma's eyes fluttered and closed, Lauren pulled at Ruby's energy, draining her to the point of death and spindling her life force into her own body. Ruby filled her mind, her heart, her soul. The magic in her blood pushed her own life force to the side, filled the space with Ruby's, and then shoved at the already housed energy some more. Gritting her teeth, she nodded to Eva who touched the foreheads of both unconscious women.

"Lauren, on the count of three, pull Ruby from her body completely. I'm with Emma in the room of fire. She's taking my hand. I've got her." Eva provided them with a play-by-play of the magically created dreamscape. "One, two, three." Eva jerked away from Ruby's body, but stayed connected to Emma's while Lauren's hands stayed firmly on Ruby.

"I've got her, Eva," she whispered. "Her body is sleeping, but she's in there."

"Go get Belle," Eva ordered, still entranced with the work she completed inside Emma's mind.

Lauren heard the order, but her body crumpled to the floor at the foot of the bed. Pulling her knees to her chest protectively, she hid her face and wailed uncontrollably. Bethany jumped for the door and motioned to her sister in the hallway before dropping to her knees and accepting Lauren's weight against her chest. The succubus accepted the comfort without reservation. Whatever she'd tapped into while Ruby inhabited her body either scared the hell out of her or hurt beyond words.

"Come on, Emma. We're coming out now, just like before," Eva encouraged the other woman quietly.

Emma sat up suddenly, nearly knocking foreheads with the seer. She gasped for air, coughed, sputtered. She raised her eyes to Belle as the librarian entered the room. A cry of joy ripped from her throat when the slightly blurry image of the woman told her that the perfect vision of the wolf had disappeared when she reentered her own body. She'd never felt such joy of being nearsighted in her entire life. Her thicker hands touched her biceps, flexing them with the narcissistic appreciation of an extreme bodybuilder. She touched her breasts next and sighed harshly. "I have never been so happy to see you, ladies," she whispered to the fleshy mounds.

Ruby groaned at her side, awakened by her lover's kiss. "Keep nasty breasts," she growled in her best Smeagol impression.

"Rubes!" She flung herself onto the groggy wolf, rolling back and forth despite the muttered protests of the woman beneath her.

The spontaneous joy of feeling right again lasted only a few seconds as Lauren's horrid cries continued. Eva dropped from sight, and even Belle left Ruby's side to kneel by the young succubus keening in agony. Ruby looked nearly ready to follow Lauren's example, and Emma stopped her playful wrestling and allowed the wolf to snuggle into her side for comfort. She rested her head against Emma's chest and numbly tossed an arm over her stomach. After a few seconds, silent tears dripped from Ruby's eyes and soaked through Emma's thin shirt.

Emma glanced up as Snow almost entered the room. "Get out. Get everyone out of here, and close the damn door," Emma ordered her mother.

"Katy," Ruby called to Snow without raising her head or blinking. The girl appeared around the corner of the door frame and then shut the rest of them out.

Without speaking, she sat in the chair Amelia used earlier to be near Emma and touched Ruby's waist softly from behind. "I'm here, Ruby," she whispered and emphasized the words with a little squeeze of her hand. Katy met Emma's gaze above Ruby's head, but Emma shrugged her free shoulder and shook her head, telling her daughter silently that she hadn't the foggiest clue as to Ruby's ailment.

"Get off me!" Lauren yelled at the foot, and the three women trying to offer comfort removed their hands immediately and pressed away from the succubus without moving from their kneeling positions.

She clawed at her chest and stood abruptly, nearly knocking Eva over in the haste to find a place in the room with enough air to continue breathing. "Just stay the fuck away from me," she threatened towards all of them, but her eyes stayed locked onto Belle's. It ended in the briefest of moments, but everyone saw it. Belle saw it. She turned away from all of them near the corner at the foot of Batch's bed, chest clutched, head bowed, shoulders heaving.

"Low-ran," Batch whispered, not quite capable of pronouncing her name fully. No wonder the girl barely spoke, she couldn't.

The young wolf lifted her hand slowly as the succubus turned her head over her shoulder to look at the injured girl. In a heart-melting gesture, she flicked her sharp blue eyes to her hand and then back to the red-rimmed green of the nurse's. Shocking all of them, Lauren moved slowly towards the proffered limb and slowly sat beside her. Bowing her head over their clasped hands, she resumed crying, quietly this time. Batch touched the crown of her head with three fingertips of her other hand. Sometimes, accepting comfort from a perfect stranger felt more compassionate. They aren't required to care, they care for the sake of humanity.

Cautiously, Eva moved the round, wheeled stool she'd used while cleaning Belle's wound to the other side of the bed to sit beside her grieving lover. Insecurity and fear rolled off of the seer palpably, and she sat perfectly still while Lauren allowed her within a two foot proximity.

"Eva," Lauren whispered without raising her head, undoubtedly sensing the closeness of her partner's energy. Hesitantly, she reached for her surgeon's skilled hand, reacting with a shudder and harsh gasp when Eva took it.

"I'm here," Eva answered softly and slipped a loving hand around the back of Lauren's neck. "I'm here."

Emma caught Belle's attention over Ruby's head. "I know you're really worried, but I've got her. Katy and I won't leave her. You should go check on Alex and Henry. I'm sure they heard Lauren screaming."

Belle nodded reluctantly and leaned over Ruby's body. "Sweetheart, if you need me, just call for me. I won't be far. I love you." She kissed the hair just above Ruby's ear and then forced herself to leave the room with Bethany's arm linked in hers.

They'd known there would be consequences. Magic this powerful demanded such sacrifices for the simple act of being unleashed. It hurt, but they survived. Hoped lived on. Their pain pulled them closer, healed wounds, sparked forgiveness. They lived to fight another day.


	26. Embers

Alright, Lovelies, we're edging towards the finish line of this behemoth. It IS called Restitution, so it's been about fixing and sort of dull as far as my grand plot go. Trust me, I feel it, too. So, stay with me, keep the reviews coming and enjoy the angst of our family being stitched back together… don't worry, I'm sure I'll rip 'em apart again before you know it.

Enjoy!

Song: Thinking out Loud by Madilyn Bailey and MAX (beautiful cover)

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><p>"Got your bullshit out?" Granny asked gruffly and wiped at her own tears as Regina pulled back and sat upright on the ground of her own accord.<p>

"You have never prolonged a meaning in your life, have you?" Regina insulted her vernacular in the way only possible of The Queen. Granny chuckled but remained otherwise silent. Regina cocked her head to the side and studied the odd reaction. The woman remained very much as she'd remembered her, a bit older and gruffer, but more or less steady and true to her morals and values. Granny had never judged her for the mayhem she'd caused but merely attempted to understand her pain. Just as she strove to understand her reasons now.

"I can't control when I slip from one to the other," The Queen admitted, angry at the perceived weakness within herself.

"That's because you're both," Granny figured. "Both sides of you make up the woman you are. You can't have one without the other, understand?" Granny struggled to her feet, and Regina stood to help the old wolf onto her creaky knees. Regina digested her words, holding her forearms though the elder wolf had stabilized on her own feet several minutes earlier. Granny allowed her the time to gather her mangled thoughts, never pushing or demanding she speak more quickly.

Regina tensed, pulling on her magic, and Granny touched her arm. "Why don't we walk? I've had enough teleporting for one day," she suggested.

"Granny, I can't go back," Regina said, sullen. The self-isolation harmed her far more than she cared to admit, but Granny always saw straight through her facades as any mother worth her salt might have.

"Why not?" She barked, parking her fists on her hips and staring down the supposed Evil Queen. Bunch of idiots overreacted one again. She just needed a little understanding, not attacked. She already planned to have a long talk with the other three once things settled a bit.

"They can't… I can't," Regina started haltingly, searching for the right words. She felt something, not love necessarily, but a fondness for the people she'd cursed into oblivion. She bowed her head, shoulders stooping. The old woman smiled.

"Welcome back," she greeted Regina warmly but no more warmly than she'd just spoken to the darker half of her. "They will," Granny assured her. "Whatever's going through that fool head, they will, and your wife needs you. Pretty soon, the biggest idiot of them all is going to tell her that she's having another child, and your Emma is going to get destroyed, you understand?"

"Granny, I can't help anyone right now," Regina admitted honestly, looking every inch of that scared and innocent girl she'd left behind so many years ago. Even her voice sound softer, younger. Granny almost saw the double braids and light blue jacket she'd worn during her horseback riding lessons.

"Well, at least one of you is smart enough to ask for help when you need it," Granny muttered and started down the hill, leading the way to town. Regina fell into step but remained silent, bouncing lightly on her feet.

"I've been watching the four of you for years now, running amuck in my town. "I've seen your tears and fears and triumphs and failures, but I've never seen any of you ask for help, not even from each other." Granny babbled, more to herself than Regina. The younger woman listened.

"We didn't know how," Regina confessed and stopped walking to meet Granny's firm but compassionate eyes. "We're all fighting our own demons, but they've never coincided like our enemies."

"Enlighten me," Granny played along, though she already suspected that she knew the answer.

"Ruby is fighting herself. That's easy. She cannot reconcile her savagery with the principles you instilled within her. Emma sacrifices herself to the point of ruin because she believes if she gives enough of herself, no one else will abandon her. Belle has spent her entire life conceding to the wishes of others because it's the only way she can be certain they won't abuse her. Until released from the curse, the woman had been nothing but an object passed from hand to hand. Though her empathy and inconceivably large capacity for forgiveness is real, she also grapples with her need to lead, her desires for the extraordinary."

"And you, Child?" Granny prodded.

Regina eyes hardened, and Granny sighed deeply. "Welcome back, Majesty," she clipped sarcastically and continued walking towards the town.

"I fear being alone," The Queen answered in a deeper, more commanding voice. "I fear being unloved. It's the reason I sought a child instead of a lover during my years within the curse." The brutal honesty surprised Granny enough to stop cold in her tracks and slowly face the younger woman. She'd prepared for more bluster and bullshit from the difficult and suspicious aspect of Regina's personality.

"I thought I could blind a child to what I truly was as my mother blinded me. I loved her until she crushed her heart in my hand." She raised the appendage in question, staring at it as though she'd never seen it before, failed to recognize her own skin and fingers. "And I love her still. I thought I could instill such loyalty of heart in Henry, but he remained true to his bloodline."

Granny's face softened into something resembling sympathetic pity. Regina's anger flared, but Granny's crossed arms smoldered it. "You're all fighting for the same thing, Regina. Love, family, a place to belong. It's why our little troupe keeps collecting outcasts for leading roles in this little melodrama."

Regina mulled the thought, and Granny resumed the trek towards town. Regina ran to catch up with her, the spring returning to her step rather than an irritable stalking. Granny sighed deeply and shook her head at the emotional whiplash Regina must have felt to continuously switch from one to the other. So much pain. These women deserved a break, but even after they emerged victorious from battle, their individual shortcomings generally wrought more disaster and heartache upon them. Silly things.

Belle putting the wrong heart in Emma's chest. Emma embracing the dark arts. Ruby fighting herself and her wolf day in and day out with Belle riling her at every possible moment to hide her own insecurities. Whatever in the hell had begun blossoming between Ruby and Regina during Emma's absence (That was a helluva a mess). Regina's request for the memory potion. None of those things were meant to intentionally harm any of the others, but they had with dire consequences. No wonder Katy screwed up so royally, Granny harrumphed in her mind.

"Might I… reside with you temporarily?" Regina startled her from the grouchy inner monologue, hands clasped behind her back, head bowed slightly. She looked 13 again, and Granny heard Cora reprimand the young princess for walking like a man but complimented her breasts. Sheer will and determination brought that girl through adolescence alive – with heavy scars gouged into her morals and sanity that left her vulnerable to the manipulation of anyone with a stronger will or slyer tongue.

Granny nodded and wrapped a stout arm that all old people of her generation seemed to possess. "Of course, if that's what you think you need in order to heal." Maybe, just maybe, she'd not lost her chance to heal the old wounds wrought upon her soul at this age. Perhaps this journey belonged to her as much as Regina.

Regina smiled bashfully up at her without fully raising her head. "I think I require a place where I feel safe. You've always made me feel safe, Granny."

Granny squeezed her shoulder, pulling her frame tighter against her bosom. It created an awkward walking pattern, but neither women noticed, comforted by the contact. "Does your more powerful half surface when you feel threatened?" She asked carelessly, not pushing the girl one way or the other. She carefully avoided trigger words like 'evil side' or 'dark side' or 'The Evil Queen.'

"Yes," Regina answered easily, trusting her elder implicitly. They walked on in silence for a few moments. "I struggle in the presence of The Savior," she elaborated.

"Is that why you gave her the memory potion?" Granny asked in that same disinterested tone that kept the girl at ease.

Regina nodded, slightly ashamed by the grievous decision. "She was the most formidable threat," she whispered, pragmatic even in her guilt.

"Because she's the only person truly capable of breaking your heart again," Granny stuck all the pieces together, pieces she'd puzzled together in her mind from the moment Regina began acting strangely.

Regina nodded and fell silent. Granny allowed it. They'd progressed enough for one day, and she already foresaw many sleepless nights in her immediate future. Regina always despised the night, choosing to stay awake rather than fight her demons in the dark. Even as a child, she struggled with the night a few months after Cora's mental abuse began. Granny strove for the age of the girl at that time but came up empty, little… six or seven, maybe. She'd wrapped herself in the problems of Anita and Jack and allowed this gem to slip through her fingers, and then a few years later, Ruby suddenly became solely her responsibility. Her honor and privilege, she amended silently, even though no one else heard the thought. She prayed Ruby learned from her mistakes and cherished her children before her absence damaged them beyond repair, made them fear the night.

She'd failed Regina to save Ruby, made an impossible choice that she hoped Ruby finally began understanding.

Time passed in a blur, and Regina only fully acknowledged that they'd returned to town proper when she stood before the sliding doors of the hospital. Granny hugged her tighter and walked her thru the doors, head up, ears alert. No one knew of the almost disaster that nearly occurred, the loss the town and its people nearly suffered by taking Regina's guiding hand from it during such a vulnerable era. She guided the young queen to the proper room that Ruby dictated before they'd gone to the barn.

Regina stiffened, digging in her heels when their family came into view outside the room. Granny rubbed her back, glancing between the group looking at them expectantly and Regina's petrified eyes. David rested his hands on Snow's shoulders in comfort. Belle held Alex on a hip and held her arm over Henry's chest to squeeze his shoulder and hug him simultaneous from behind, barely tall enough to be seen over his recent growth spurt. Bethany cuddled Annabel to her chest. Further back, Amelia and Caleb sat in a couple of plastic chairs. They all waited, praying, hoping.

Regina tensed, and Granny thought for a moment that she'd lost her. She halted their progress abruptly and rubbed Regina's arm, telling her silently that she'd not ask more of her that day.

"Alright, girl," she murmured. "Stay right here. I'm going to go let them know that you're okay, and then we'll go to my apartment at the diner. Stay right here," she repeated with emphasis, looking over her glasses with stern eyes.

Regina nodded and held perfectly still as Granny left her side and approached Belle and Henry. They said things that her mortal ears failed to hear. Everyone relaxed visibly and glanced in her direction. Belle said something to Granny, and the old woman's shoulders drooped in what appeared to be relief. Without leaving her sight, Granny poked her head into the room and pulled back with a happy expression on her cheeks now rosy from the hike and excitement. She said something else to Belle, touched her cheek, and then marched back to Regina.

"Come, Regina, we've been charged with making a wonderful dinner for our family. Caleb will pick it up at the diner when it's ready. Thought he'd be the safest choice, hmm?" Granny cooed at her like a child, and Regina felt that familiar desperation for maternal affection swell in her chest. Granny wanted her. Granny hadn't abandoned her. Granny returned without ordering the sad-eyed group of heroes to attack her.

Henry raised his hand as a parting call, and Regina slowly returned it as she leaned into Granny's stout figure once more and left the hospital without glancing over her shoulder. Eva and Lauren emerged from the room in time to see the underwhelming departure of the broken woman.

"So, that's it. We're just going to let her leave, not even try," Henry yelled at the group, his adolescent voice cracking and squealing with the increased emotions of the moment.

"Henry, your mom needs time to herself right now," Belle explained, but the words sounded hollow even to her.

"No, we have to do something. She shouldn't be alone," Henry demanded. They all felt the boy's pain, but the reality remained that no one but Granny possessed the power to help Regina right now.

"She's not alone, Henry. Granny won't leave her, and we'll try to go see her soon, okay?" Belle tried again, unable to really touch the boy with Alex sprawled across her chest. "She needs this, Henry." She reached out with her free hand, but he smacked it away belligerently.

"What do you know? You promised you'd never leave any of us. You promised that you'd always be around to protect me. Where have you been, Belle? People were dying. Aunt Ruby, Granny, Lauren was missing for weeks. Katy tried to kill herself. Where the hell have you been? What the hell do you know about what people need? We needed you here!" His chest heaved, face flushed, as he ran out of steam enough to feel embarrassed about the tears in his eyes.

"Henry," Belle tried to reach out to him again, but the boy barreled through the group of adults and sprinted down the hallway. His punched Belle in the chest, and she felt herself move forward and extend her daughter towards the first person with available and capable arms. She'd understood that her actions came with serious ramifications, but she'd not expected one of those to be Henry's angry. She'd taken his blind faith in her for granted and trampled all over it.

Before Belle handed a drowsy Alex to David, Caleb stood and held out his hands to stop her. "Stay by Ruby and Emma. I'll talk to him. Can someone help Amelia get back to her room?" David stepped up and allowed the woman to lean against him as the other man jogged down the hallway after the upset boy.

Belle sighed in frustration and turned her back to the group, seething as privately as possible at her failure, "I used to be able to calm him with just a look." He'd never left her side during the two months his mothers traipsed about Neverland. She had always served as his comfort, his solace, his rock. She hugged Alex to her just a little closer.

"Perhaps you should have thought of that before you abandoned your family for no apparent reason," Lauren snapped and stalked towards Amelia and David to offer her assistance. Amelia needed sedated and put to bed for a week. She'd gone above and beyond the past few days, and they needed her sharp in order to understand the memory potion currently keeping Emma broken in half as much as Regina. One thing at a time. Today was finished in regards to progress, only healing remained.

Belle turned slowly to face the rest of the group, too shocked by the sudden vehemence tossed at her. "Have I done something to upset her?" Belle asked Eva quietly and hiked Alex further on her hip. Maybe she became the most convenient target to blow boiling steam at because everyone already harbored anger towards her for bolting in the middle of, literally, a life and death situation. Their entire family ached and throbbed with the daunting task of somehow moving past this ordeal.

"I'm certain it's less to do with your actions towards her than towards Ruby," Eva answered cryptically. "Emma and Ruby would like to go home," she changed the subject before Belle pried any further.

"Of course," the crestfallen librarian responded, taking the hint easily.

"Belle, we can take Annabel for the night. It's no trouble," Snow offered graciously, but Belle shook her head.

"Why don't you and David come over for dinner later? Emma could really use your support right now," she counteroffered. Her focused shifted quickly to something beyond the hateful words that sliced through her heart.

"Nothing serious, just a nice evening of being together," she added pointedly, and Snow nodded slowly, understanding the meaning without pressing for more details. Emma needed to know about her baby brother soon, but not that day, not with Regina like that.

"I'll call Granny and ask Austin to bring dinner to the mansion," Belle plotted the rest of their evening, uncertain exactly how all the executive decisions about the children and dinner fell into her hands. Regina usually handled it. She pressed the tips of her fingers between her eyes, fighting the migraine with a little extra pressure, and sighed deeply. She could do this. She wasn't flashing back, her hormones felt balanced for the moment, Alexandra had stopped fussing a half an hour ago, her stomach remained settled for the moment. Her turn to take charge fell upon her suddenly.

"Okay," she settled into her role once she saw Ruby and Emma emerge from the room, leaning against each other for support. Ruby found a hospital gown that wrapped around her stick-figure enough to tie the strings in front through the jagged holes someone created on one side. It looked like a wrap instead of a gown. Ruby needed to eat. Snow snapped her from the silent rant when she went immediately to her daughter and slipped an arm around her waist.

Belle nodded in approval. "Where's Katy?"

Ruby jerked a thumb over her shoulder. "She wants to stay with Batch. Austin can bring her and Caleb some dinner or Caleb can go get it or whatever. I'm sure Lauren and Eva are going to go home and crash. Right?" She turned her eyes towards the seer who nodded once in response and then returned to the room.

She reappeared a moment later with the manila envelopes and Katy's cell phone. "She keeps throwing the damn thing in the sink, so just take it and save her the misery. I'll loan her mine for the night since I have my pager. Ruby, you need to call Jack and get information about this girl. She looks underage, and I'm bound by law to report her to child services if I can't find a guardian."

Ruby stiffened, pulling herself to her full height. "She's a wolf, Eva."

"I'm aware, but that doesn't change the laws of this world that I am bound to follow," Eva argued. "This hospital has suffered enough loss and disruption recently, and I will not damage the fragile balance we've found again by allowing The Council to demote me and put someone like Whale in charge again for failure to follow protocol, especially where a minor is concerned. Regina cannot protect us in this state," Eva explained her stance calmly, and Ruby knew her decision already stood firm. This hospital was her baby.

"How about a compromise? She deferred to me as her alpha more than once in there. I'll assume responsibility until another guardian comes forward." Ruby made it look so easy. Just like that, she's a wolf, she's mine.

Eva pressed her lips into a thin line and then nodded once. "I'll take that for the moment. The situation is unique. I'll check on her periodically throughout the night, and I imagine Caleb intends to stay with Amelia two doors down. If you need to contact me, remember to use Lauren's cell phone. With her healing abilities, I'd estimate her stay no more than two days before her lung is healed enough to be discharged."

"Thanks, Eva. I'd give you a hug, but I think you've been in our heads enough today," Ruby joked. Eva narrowed her eyes and disappeared into the room.

"Do you think it's wise to leave Katy unsupervised?" Belle addressed the concern at the forefront of everyone's thoughts.

Ruby glanced over her shoulder and fingered the objects in her hand. "She'll be fine. Caring for Batch can only make her feel good about herself, give her something to focus on that isn't the insanity of the past two weeks."

Everyone looked at Ruby like she grew two heads and danced an Irish jig wearing a fluffy pink princess tutu.

"I'm with Ruby," Emma piped up, putting the subject to bed. She stared forlornly towards the entrance of the hospital, somehow sensing that Regina had been near. Of course, she knew that she stood outside her door not five minutes ago, but she felt it. In her soul, she felt her.

"Snow, I need a favor," Emma whispered to her mother, not that it helped. Everyone crowded so much around them that she should have spoken normally, but whispering felt right.

"Emma," Belle warned, sympathetic but firm. "She doesn't want to see us right now. We've all had our breakdowns, it's Regina's turn." She hiked Alex higher, transferring the deadweight of her sleeping child onto her shoulder and chest, wincing slightly at the painful pressure she put on her breasts and the second degree burn left behind by Regina's fireball. Gauze separated the tender flesh from the tiny girl's scratchy Dalmatian decal on her red shirt, but the human shelf took a bit of the weight off her trembling arms.

"No, Belle, we haven't. Just because I haven't been here does not mean that I've had the luxury of a breakdown. Everything I've done has been a fight to just get back to her because I feel her in my fucking heart, but I can't even remember who the hell she is!" Emma yelled. Alex startled in Belle's arms, whimpered, glanced around in a panic and then settled into Belle's neck to cry softly.

"Shhh, it's alright, Alexandra," Belle comforted her daughter with a soft tone and soothing hand on her little back. She glared at Emma who glared right back.

"Welcome to our mornings, naptimes, and bedtimes for the past two months," Emma snapped. "I'm glad you're back, but you've lost the right to advise me on the appropriate course of action where my family is concerned. Or do you forget that I was willing to lose my memories and possibly die to go The Enchanted Forest with all of you?" The Savior ripped into her friend viciously, reverting to Young Emma's defense mechanisms to prevent more pain. Belle reeled from the onslaught, falling silent for lack of any sort of response that might have diffused the situation. What the hell was this? Punch Belle where it hurt the most now that crisis had been averted?

Snow grunted when the brunt of Emma's weight fell onto her. Ruby snapped, "That's enough, Emma," quietly, too quietly. Emma banged the drum to the beat in everyone's mind, but it only ripped them further apart. She touched Belle's hair, kissed her temple and then Alex's. "Enough," she whispered against her daughter's head, and the girl settled down at the gentle command.

Without preamble, Ruby disengaged and clomped towards the entrance, quiet and still despite the obviously huge amount of energy buzzing beneath her surface. Something obviously transferred from Lauren to Ruby and vice versa, but they'd sworn each other to secrecy, as it should have been. Still, the sight of the strong, hardheaded, proud wolf walking away with the subtle energy register of the tender succubus worried them. Ruby exuded energy, like the good little overly emotional extrovert she was. Lauren absorbed it, and the abrupt change definitely merited monitoring.

"She okay?" David asked as he and Lauren rejoined the group.

Belle shifted Alex again. How long had she hefted 35 pounds of sleeping toddler while they waited for Ruby and Emma and Lauren and Eva to recover? At least 45 minutes. David took pity on the pregnant woman and reached for the girl.

"Alex, want to go to Uncle David for a little while?" Belle asked, leaning her head back to try and see the face of the tiny monkey clinging to her neck. Alex shook her head vehemently and loosed an animalistic shriek. Belle's face pinched tightly in a pained expression from the ringing in her increasingly sensitive ears.

"Okay, okay, okay," she promised the toddler who settled down to sniffle quietly once more. "You can stay right here, Baby," Belle promised and pressed a lingering kiss to the side of her head. With a glance to Emma and then Snow and David, Belle sighed heavily.

"David, will you call Caleb and ask him if he wouldn't mind watching Henry and then go with Snow and Emma to the diner to see Regina?" David nodded and pulled out his phone, sensing the storm brewing beneath the other woman's usually placid surface. He'd learned the hard way not to press a pregnant woman. "Thank you," Belle breathed.

"Bethany," she started, but her younger sister merely held up a hand and pulled Annabel closer.

"This is my charge for the night," she assured Belle in her own clipped, regal way, and then softened as she cooed at the slobbering infant. With all their power, royals still refused to speak plainly, Belle noted with a hint of disgust in the language she used to find elegant and proper. Why couldn't Bethany simply have said, 'I love you, Belle. You're obviously going to need help tonight, and I'm with you all the way.' Like Emma or Ruby would have? She beat away the thoughts racing through her brain and focused on David's moving mouth.

"Caleb says he'd be more than happy to hang with Henry for a couple hours."

"Great, so Henry is with Caleb, Katy is staying with Batch. Jack is coming to sit with them. Shit, did Ruby call Jack?" She glanced around, but no one knew.

"I'll call him," David offered helpfully.

Belle nodded and continued her list. "You, are going with Snow and David who will bring you by the mansion for dinner." She met Emma's eyes. "Beth is going to babysit Annabel with me and Ruby at the mansion. Amelia is probably passed out in her hospital bed, and you and Eva are going to your apartment to get some sleep. Have I missed anyone?" She asked, not quite trusting herself to have handled everything. "Wait, who has the damn dagger?" Belle slapped her hip and snorted at herself. She never thought the power of The Dark One such a burden, constantly worrying about the beautifully ornate but incredibly deadly object that Ruby packed around on a daily basis.

"That's Wolf's dagger," Alex protested, pushing back on her shoulders to glare at Belle in an adorable way only children managed.

"It is," Belle promised the tiny ball of attitude. "I'm just holding it for her until she's better." Alex nodded in satisfaction and resumed clinging to her neck. Belle released a slow, deliberate, silent breath in response to the aversion of that small. She'd been home six days. They'd resolved their catastrophe in time for Bethany's surgery the following morning, another mind fuck altogether.

After a quick reassurance from Katy that she'd stay put all night and a stunted goodbye from Lauren, Belle led them away from the room. When they reached the entrance of the hospital, Ruby slowly exited the Camry she'd pulled to the front and helped Bethany get Annabel buckled into the back, though Alex clung to Belle until the last moment to release her Mama. Bethany nearly swore in the vernacular trying to figure out Annabel's car seat, the "infernal contraption," and Ruby patiently showed her how to hook it properly. Everyone watched the interaction with fascination but withheld comment. Whatever Ruby saw and felt while hosted in Lauren's body dug deep and rutted a gorge into the ever-present angry energy surrounding the wolf. She looked far older than her 29 years, and yet somehow younger without the pinched lines of rage marking her face.

Belle stared blatantly, not even bothering to study her discreetly like the others while they waited for David to bring his truck to get Emma and Snow. Ruby crossed one arm over her stomach and held the other elbow, and Belle smiled fondly at the gesture she'd seen a million times. Ruby was still Ruby.

"What?" Ruby blurted, diffident under the scrutiny.

Belle smiled, scar stretching with the wideness of it. "I forgot how beautiful you were, that's all," she answered bashfully, acutely aware of the extra eyes on the private moment. She'd forgotten how much she loved watching Ruby move. The natural fluidity and physical dignity clashed with Ruby's insecurity as a woman – despite the fact that she was still the most gorgeous creature that ever graced the earth in Belle's opinion.

Ruby flushed and dropped her head, heart lifting with the attention she'd so desperately sought from her lover for far longer than the brief hiatus Belle felt she needed. She'd not really felt attractive since her internment on Hook's ship at Cora's hands, but if Belle continued looking at her with that look in her eyes, Ruby thought maybe, just maybe she'd feel worthy to be looked at again. Belle smiled wider, her cheeks aching with the effort. Suddenly, the ache in her arms faded to the background, and she brushed her cheek over Alex's hair without taking her eyes from Ruby's.

"Would I completely destroy that feeling if I spit on the ground?" Belle asked, laughing at herself alongside Ruby's light chuckle. The wolf shook her head, and Belle at least turned from the rest of her the group to expectorate the excess drool pooling beneath her tongue and in her cheeks. She smiled up at Ruby and happily tucked beneath the arm she offered. Ruby's body hadn't taken half the beating or energy loss as Emma's. She just felt like she'd not slept for a day or two, not really like Emma's soul slowly killed her body. Poor Emma looked like death warmed over with a fresh side of refried kick-to-the-teeth.

So, Ruby gently pried Alex from around her mother's neck, relieving her fiancée's quivering arms of their precious load. The transfer went far more smoothly than the one she'd attempted with David, and Alex resumed an identical position of hiding in Ruby's hair, arms wrapped around her neck. Belle dropped her tired arms to hang loosely around Ruby's thin hips and rested her head against the other side of Ruby's neck. Belle gasped lightly, breaking under the sudden emotion of the moment, and ran her hands over Ruby's back and hips and ribs. Explanation of the reaction seemed trite at that point. She held the right soul in the right body, and everyone saw the perfection of that moment as much as they felt it.

"Have you always smelled like this?" Belle asked, suddenly aware of a faint musk mingling with the lingering scents of Emma's shampoo, forest and dirt from Emma's captivity, and hints of Regina's sandalwood lotion which probably transferred from Regina.

"Is it a sort of… ummm, primal scent, like you can sense me on a molecular level almost?" Ruby asked, and Belle nodded. "Then yes, I've always smelled like this, you just couldn't pick up the scent before."

Belle pressed close and inhaled a healthy breath near Ruby's throat and then laid her head on Ruby's collarbone, content to hold her lover's hips for another moment. "I like it," she whispered.

"You two are making me want to slap you again," Emma muttered, shattering the overwhelming, nauseating adorableness of the moment. Ruby only smirked and pressed her lips to the crown of light brown and bottle blonde hair tickling her chin, and Belle smiled contentedly but opened her eyes to make sure Emma only jested. She'd pissed everyone off enough for one lifetime.

Luckily, David saved them from an awkward moment by pulling up in his truck. He hopped out and rounded the front to open the door for his wife and help Emma climb into the higher vehicle. Ruby and Belle reluctantly parted so Ruby could strap Alex into her booster seat beside Bethany in the back.

"David, do not let her drive. She's fucking blind," Ruby jabbed one last time at Emma who flipped her the bird with the hand dangling out the window.

"That's because you wouldn't wear my glasses or contacts, dumb ass," Emma sniped, not really upset but tired enough to sound irritated. David smiled at his daughter and then pulled away from the hospital.

"Do you think she'll get through?" Ruby ask Belle over the hood of the car.

"We can hope. Regina is a very broken woman," the librarian answered sadly. A stab of guilt burned through her chest, and she met Ruby's eyes. "Do you think I did the right thing? Attacking her, I mean?"

Ruby's face softened, forehead scrunching a bit, eyes wide and empathetic… the first Ruby-expression Belle fell in love with that day she'd wrapped an arm around her shoulders and led her towards the inn entrance the day Emma saved her from a complete memory wipe in the mines. How could she have known where that one compassionate expression on the features of the most beautiful woman she'd ever seen would lead her three and a half years later?

"Would you have expected Regina to do the same if you lost control?" Ruby asked, wishing for the ability to read Belle's thoughts. She felt off, but there… more _there_ than usual but less readable. She felt new, Ruby realized, and her heart fluttered.

"Absolutely," Belle answered with an introspective smile. She and Regina solidified that unspoken agreement the moment she protected Belle's heart while Zelena terrorized Storybrooke to avoid a forced magical showdown between them. "She'd have preferred that to unleashing something else in Storybrooke."

Ruby nodded with an effacing but somehow charming smile that completely removed her opinion from the question and left the answer up to Belle's big brain. Belle pursed her lips, still unable to place her finger on the change in Ruby. Whatever she'd seen during the soul exchange had centered her again, healed something that had been broken, maybe something that Ruby hadn't even realized had cracked until it mended once more.

"Let's go home. I've been in leather pants for two days and I have places that require air flow," Belle pulled them through the moment with the surprisingly raunchy comment, and Ruby actually rolled her eyes at the supposedly eloquent woman as she sank behind the wheel of Emma's Camry.

The moment the shifter moved into the "D" slot, Ruby's hand found Belle's and laced their fingers together. They'd be okay, Belle realized, wondering briefly if this was the sort of faith Emma always felt in her love for Regina. Ruby was her touchstone, the hearth ever-burning, and while she finally realized that never changed with time, she also accepted her own responsibility for stoking the embers.

With an extended sideways glance that pulled her head down slightly, Belle studied Ruby's face as she concentrated on the quiet, nearly-empty streets that they both loved so very much. "Ruby Lucas, I want to make you my wife before I get too big to make love to you."

Ruby smiled, surprised but not shocked by the bold statement. "Name a date, and I'll be there in whatever attire you deem appropriate," she vowed. She thought about suggesting the courthouse right then and there, but Belle wanted a wedding, a commitment ceremony. It shocked her when she realized that she maybe (kind of, sort of) wanted one, too.

"I wonder if The Evil Queen will wear a bridesmaid dress," Bethany pondered from the backseat, and the couple shared a knowing smile.

Of course she would. Because everything would be okay. Everything would heal, including Regina's fractured mind.


	27. Self-Destruct

Ye of little faith… it's boring at this point in the game.

That little rant aside, Thank you for the reviews. I have finally reached the destination I've striven for since the start, so yay for planned things.

Huge shout out to my girl pixip53. This girl gives me feedback as quickly as I throw things at her, which is at least 1-2 chapters a day, so she kicks all the ass.

Enjoy!

Songs: The One by Terri Clark, Fix You by Mysha Didi

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><p>"David, I need to stop at the pharmacy," Emma blurted quickly. Panic set in not 30 seconds after they pulled from the hospital parking lot. Belle thought of what Regina needed, and they all knew that she required some time to sort out a possibly permanent situation. She'd thought only of her wife, and she'd verbally assaulted her. Ignoring Belle's feelings for the moment, she focused on her logic.<p>

"Everything okay?" David asked patiently. She really liked her dad. Her relationship with Snow felt strained and awkward because of her friendship with Mary Margaret, but David's affection felt easy, less critical.

"I can't just show up for no reason when Regina obviously wants to be left alone," Emma sulked. Why couldn't it be easy? Not that she remembered, but it felt like it'd always been hard with them. Anything worth having came difficultly, she reminded herself.

David dutifully followed his daughter's wishes, helped her hobble around the small store – one hand on her back and the other holding a small red basket full of gauze and antibacterial cream and a small golden bag of hazelnut Lindor Truffles. That one confused the prince, but he allowed Emma to toss whatever she deemed necessary into the basket and paid for it without hesitation since Emma had been left without anything but a cell phone and the sweat-stained clothes on her back.

She clutched the bags to her chest after climbing into the truck beside Snow once more. The teacher smiled at her encouragingly and squeezed her knee during the brief ride to Granny's diner. Both of them nodded and smiled when she looked to them for guidance and support.

"We'll wait ten minutes before we go home just in case," David offered. Emma smiled tightly, more of a grimace really. "Call us when you're ready to go home."

"I am going home," Emma murmured, gaze fixed forlornly at the entrance to the new establishment that Marco replicated beautifully for the woman he apparently loved. Still wrapping her head around that one. Her parents shared an understanding look. They, too, had been tested time and again without losing the burning need for the other. Regina felt like home to Emma, even without her memories. She'd lost them before and dreamed of Regina, loved the phantom woman haunting her, and she loved her now.

With a deep breath, Emma opened the creaky door and slid from the truck. The tiny jolt shot tendrils of pain throughout her aching body. She hoped Ruby felt better. Her body ached like it had in the weeks following her accident at the town line, and she felt even worse after running about with wolf strength for five days. Plastic rattling in the salty breeze wafting from the ocean, Emma stalked towards the door, figuring the direct approach best. Remove the band aid in one swift motion. She expected people, customers, employees, guests at the inn.

She found Tink sweeping the floor near the back of the dining room, chairs sat upside down on the tables at the front near the door. The fairy turned waitress glanced up, smiled sadly, and then returned to her duties without a single word. Emma stepped towards her, intent on uncovering Regina's location, but the woman in question emerged from the kitchen, having heard the ding of the bell above the door.

"Hello Emma," she greeted quietly.

"Hey," The Savior returned almost shyly. Something felt different, calmer yet exciting in a completely different way than fighting The Evil Queen.

Granny watched the interaction from the window between the kitchen and dining area, not even bothering to hide the blatant stare. She slid a plate onto the small counter there, heavy porcelain scratching over vinyl too loudly in the unusually quiet diner. A second plate joined the first, and still Emma and Regina only stared at each other.

"We anticipated your arrival," Regina blurted but remained fixed in her spot holding the door open, half-in in kitchen.

"That Granny is a smart woman," Emma praised almost playfully. Regina's face lit up, but the smile in her eyes failed to reach her lips. She controlled those expressions, but she failed to control the lightness in her eyes. Emma stepped forward. Regina stepped back. Emma stopped.

"Do you want to get your plate and sit over there?" Emma pointed to the booth in the back. "And then I'll get mine and sit here?" She pointed to the very first stool at the counter, the two points separated by the most distance. Regina studied the plan for a painfully long moment and then nodded. She grabbed the first plate and kept a wary eye over her shoulder as she moved to the booth. Tink respectfully disappeared into the kitchen.

Emma crossed the room slowly, acutely aware of Regina's cautionary gaze. When she reached the other end of the counter, she set the bags down with a faint rattle. "I brought some gauze and stuff so Granny can clean that up. I mean, she probably has her own stuff, but…" Emma clamped her mouth shut, grabbed her burger and fries, and returned to the front of the diner.

"Thank you," Regina said politely. When Emma glanced over her shoulder, she found soft caramel eyes studying her. They wanted something, something Emma felt incapable of providing without her memories. Regina blinked rapidly, destroying the moment, and lowered her gaze to the salad on her plate.

Emma allowed it to slip through her fingers, content to simply be in the presence of her wife without being shackled or under magical fire. She perched on the blue upholstered stool and chomped into her burger. Regina felt different, she noted again. The longer she remained split, the more opposite her personalities seemed. This Regina behaved timidly, bashful and embarrassed and innocent. The other Regina attacked her and Belle again, but it felt different. If Granny hadn't broken up the fight when she had, Emma felt no comforting certainty that Belle and Regina wouldn't have taken each other apart bit by bit. She'd seen the darkness in Regina's eyes, she wanted them both dead.

"I hate birds," Emma blurted.

Regina giggled, almost inaudible across the room. "What?"

Emma flashed a lopsided grin and shrugged. "I hate birds. They smell. They're loud in the morning and always find a perch right outside my bedroom window. They poop on people and follow you down the street. I swear, I'm stalked by the birds of Storybrooke." Emma smiled at Regina's girlish smile and soaked up the warmth of her laughter.

"I imagined the daughter of Snow White genetically predisposed to delusional conversations with winged companions," Regina barbed, still sweet and a bit naïve, but obviously still Regina.

Emma leaned over her plate, the corner of the bar biting into the length of her forearms. "Guess nurture beat nature on that one," she answered, downtrodden and slightly defeated. What made her believe this valiant gallop on her white steed would end any differently than all the other attempts?

"I never knew this about you," Regina admitted, still grinning in a way that made her look like a bashful teenager, not the almost-40 former mayor and current head of their council. The gleeful expression faded the moment she realized how deeply the words sliced into Emma.

"When I was younger, I used to stare out my bedroom window and daydream of transforming into a bird. I'd watch them play in the higher currents of air and chase their mates around the orchard. They always seemed so free, capable of anything because their wings never failed them," Regina confessed the silly childhood notion reticently, scared of rejection from this woman who wanted her so greatly.

Emma's head rose slowly at the connection Regina just made, not only between them but her and Snow's similarities. She studied Regina's whimsical expression, distant with nostalgia and something sweeter, something Regina had lost over time. She opened her eyes, practically glowing with the force of the life within them. Emma smiled again, encouraging the other woman. "I could see the appeal in that," she agreed and popped a fry her mouth. "Still fucking creepy creatures, though."

Regina giggled again and pushed salad around her plate, disinterested in the food but distracting herself. Emma floundered for something to say, something that wasn't a stupid quip about birds or apologetic or accusatory. The list of possible sentences that left dwindled to a single digit number. Emma sighed, eyes focusing on the dessert board behind the counter with 'Apple Pie' written brazenly at the top.

"You had an orchard?"

Regina nodded enthusiastically. "Oh yes, one of my father's main sources of income. He provided many jobs for the people of our province with his industry." A brilliant smile spread on Regina's lip, vein popping in her forehead. "Every year during harvest season, I'd gaze out my window and watch the people toss the sweet fruit to the catchers on the ground and the wagons constantly rolling in and out of our estate. I thought the entire ordeal quite exciting as nothing hardly changed during the rest of the year, but harvest season…" Her gaze turned distance, sweetly so, and Emma couldn't have helped the smile aching in her cheeks if she'd tried.

"Sounds amazing," Emma agreed, picturing a very young Regina with her face and hands pressed to the glass.

"It was," Regina agreed. "Every year, my father and I sat by the fire and dried slices of the juiciest apples. It drove Mother to distraction, the hours we wasted in front of that old hearth in Father's study. And every year, I always asked him why he wasted a piece of his land. You see, there was this large circle that he'd cleared supposedly in the year I was born, but no one ever really knew why. He always answered with the same words."

She narrowed her eyes and pointed slyly, perhaps making the motion of tipping someone's nose. "_That ground is sacred. Something special will grow there one day,"_ Regina imitated her father, and Emma hoped it was a terrible impersonation because she'd never have held a straight conversation with her father-in-law otherwise. She sounded more like Popeye like a man of the royal bloodline.

"Did he ever tell you what it was for?" Emma asked when the channeling of Henry faded away and Regina returned.

She smiled brightly, and Emma knew that it'd been something wonderful. "One evening, as we sat by the fire, I asked the question as he knew I would. Instead of answering me that night, he persuaded me to walk with him in the orchard. When we reached that barren circle, I noticed two tiny little apple trees in the center. The space offered far more room than that of two trees, so I asked why only two. He led me straight to those little trees, a Honeycrisp and Black Oxford as they're so called in this world."

"Why two different kinds?" Emma asked, totally enchanted by the tale of Regina's first apple tree, half-eaten burger and fries forgotten.

"Pollination. The Honeycrisp Tree, though more resilient to cold and human influence than any other tree, cannot produce fruit without the pollination of another tree with a similar bloom and harvest cycle," Regina explained, completely oblivious to the little backwards jerk of Emma's neck and fluttering of her eyes. Well, if that wasn't a metaphor, she wasn't sure anything was.

Her father had known, Emma realized. He'd known the trajectory of his daughter's fate under the guidance of her mother's hand and tried to warn her, to prepare her, to instill something beyond greed and power-lust. Regina smiled sadly and dropped her gaze to the plate once again. The emotional recall of the moment told Emma that she'd not understood as a child, but an older, more reflective Regina had figured it out at some point. She'd kept the trees with her every day since then, though.

"I always wondered why you had two different types," Emma commented, pushing through the moment before Regina became trapped in her memories.

Regina shrugged. "It cannot bear fruit without its partner," she tossed out nonchalantly, consciously choosing not to acknowledge the powerful meaning behind that statement. Chewing a bite of salad, she studied The Savior pensively until she swallowed. "Why did you come here?"

"I wanted to see you," Emma answered easily and popped a fry in her mouth.

"You know what I did. You know I gave you the potion. Why would you want to see me?" Regina asked, a sliver of self-pity shaking loose the softness of her voice. Emma sensed the switch, held her breath, watched those innocent brown eyes harden into crystalline obsidian. Emma waited for the transformation to complete before speaking.

"Because I love you," she said simply and bit into her burger.

Regina scoffed. "Then you're a bigger fool than your mother."

"And you're an insecure bitch, but I'm okay with both of those things," Emma threw an insult right back. It felt wrong to say anything of the sort to Regina, but this form of the woman in her heart needed the challenge or she'd shred Emma before they ever began a conversation. She ached for something to break the monotony of constantly winning.

Regina clicked her tongue condescendingly. "My, my, quite the dashing hero. How do you rescue the damsel and slay the monster when they inhabit the same body?" Regina slid from the booth and sauntered towards Emma, hips swaying sensually with each predatory tap of her riding boot and creak of leather pants.

Emma turned on the stool and leaned her elbows against the counter, not giving Regina a hint of fear or apprehension at the less-than-friendly approach.

"Tame the beast and corrupt the girl," Emma answered sarcastically, throwing Regina off her step. The Queen stopped a few feet from her, eyes narrowed in a threatening glare.

"Hey," Granny called from the kitchen window. "You going to help with this lasagna or undress The Savior with your eyes all day?"

Regina tipped her head over her shoulder. "That old bat closed down her entire business until further notice. Think our girl Tinker Bell will turn to the world's oldest profession to make rent?"

"Are you offering your coffers?" Emma lobbed, disinterested. Though the thought struck a pang of grief in her chest, she also realized that this possibility loomed in the background. Regina needed sex to control her anger, and Emma obviously fell pretty low on the list of people she wanted to fornicate with in such a situation as theirs.

Regina smirked lasciviously. "I'm certain that lonely little fairy would give of herself freely to me. She'd always been such a lonely one, a pariah in search of comfort," she described Tink perfectly. Regina always knew how to read people, manipulate their weaknesses, so the statement itself shocked Emma very little. The underlying suggestion, however, sliced her to the core. Regina and Tinker Belle? When had that happened? Why had Regina never said anything? They'd both harmlessly flirted with the highly attractive and available woman, but it'd never seemed more than friendly banter. Maybe she had, but it'd been erased.

"Oh," Regina pursed her lips in mock sympathy as soon as the realization crossed Emma's face and stepped into her space. Emma swallowed roughly and tried to contain the hurt surely dancing behind her eyes as Regina pinned her to the bar with a hand on either side of her ribs. "I'd forgotten how clueless you were, dear. Memories really are slippery notions," she taunted, twisting the knife.

"Regina," Granny demanded harshly, now standing in the middle of the dining area.

"Coming," Regina answered, not rushed or eager to please or apologetic to avoid trouble. She enjoyed her ability to rile both women simultaneously but in different ways. Leaning forward, she parted her lips and slowly licked Emma's upper lip, toying with the other woman. The Savior held her breath, waiting for the goading to cease. That's all it was. Regina wanted a reaction, not just any old reaction either. She wanted Emma to hurt, to cry, to beg her stop being who she was, but this person only represented half of who Regina had become.

"Emma, maybe you should go," Granny suggested in a tone that indicated a command more than a request.

"Why?" Emma barked. "Run from this fraud? I don't think so," she pushed Regina back and sprang to her feet to push her again. The shock of the sudden ire in The Savior electrocuted her system enough to silence any retort or call upon her magic for defense.

"I know what you're doing, and I'm not taking it anymore, Regina," Emma explained calmly, a calm lethality in her eyes. She wanted to hurt Regina back. She'd _given up_ on them.

"I've gone to hell and back for you. Not even this twisted, half a person pet you've become, tripping along behind your granny, can change that fact. You wanted to forget me because you knew how much you needed me. Well, I'm done trying, Regina." Emma threw up her hands for lack of anything else to do. She needed to move, to run, to flee this clawing beast scratching and shredded from the inside out. Grief. She centered herself once more, crossing her arms defensively, the only barrier between her and the emotional ruin awaiting just beyond Granny's door.

"If you want to live the rest of your life bouncing back and forth until you go insane, that's your life. But know this, you will never see your children, you will never know them, know what they did with their lives, who they became. Belle, Ruby and I will take care of them and love them like you should have been loving them."

Her words remained calm, controlled, a testament to the intense emotions floating through her system. Regina's eyes misted slightly at the thought of losing those dearest to her. Sure, she'd tried to abandon them, but being denied access and watching them grow from afar sliced into her heart with a different type of anguish. Emma might have stopped there. She might have hugged her wife, but betrayal burned brightly in her heart. Regina _had_ given her the potion. Regina abandoned her, first emotionally and barely thwarted physically by her and Belle.

Emma lunged for her throat with a sneer.

"Amelia can take your place in my bed. I'm pretty sure the reason she won't marry Caleb is because she has more than friendly feeling towards me. Maybe I'll use Belle and Ruby's pendants to make a little Amelia with blonde hair and big, dark brown eyes, not like yours, like hers. She and Annabel would never know they weren't siblings. Amelia and I could pull that off with our physical characteristics, and I have the same kind of magic as Annabel." Emma ran out of steam, chest heaving, chest and face flushed. The maelstrom of emotions swirled and clashed, ringing sounds of battle in her mind.

"If you want to be simply a memory, Regina, not even that, then that's exactly what I'll make you," Emma threatened, too tired to feel the thrust of grief, too emotionally battered to feel guilty. Regina pushed, and she snapped.

Behind Regina, Granny's mouth unhinged, eyes wide. Shock, both women stared in shock, unable to speak or process Emma's words. Emma crossed her arms and widened her stance, feeling more like herself than she had in months. "You had everything, Regina, and if you aren't willing to fight for that, then I am done fighting for you."

Emma stalked towards the door and wrenched it open but halted on the top stoop. "Maybe you need to fight for me for a change," she tossed over her shoulder without looking back to watch the spear hit the center of the target and gave no opportunity for a response as the door slammed behind her, bell jangling violently.

She glanced up to see David sitting in his truck sans Snow, watching the interaction curiously. With the subtly of a bullhorn, she ripped open the door and hopped inside. Anger, adrenaline, and determination fueled her body, the only things keeping her upright after the few exhausting days she'd just survived.

"Emma?' David said cautiously.

Emma crossed her arms, throwing up any and every piece of flotsam available to keep the man out of her thoughts and emotions. "Take me to the hospital, David. My son needs at least one of his mothers."

David nodded, choosing silence to an actual answer and started the truck. Whatever just went down between his daughter and her wife either started the healing process or a slow self-destruct countdown. Only time revealed which one.


	28. Chats

Thank you for the reviews, Friends. Enjoy!

Song: Who You Are by Jessie J

Emma held Henry's shoulders and walked the boy up the sidewalk to the mansion. He'd not said much yet, but Caleb pulled her aside and let her know that he talked to him. He hurt but stood strong. It was something at least. If tensions mounted too high or too quickly, Caleb agreed to take him over to Amelia's house, about four doors away, and keep him calm for the next couple of days until reality began manageable.

"Henry, you don't have to apologize to Belle right away, okay. She understands," Emma encouraged the boy when he started digging in his heels.

As if the words held magically properties, the door to the mansion flew open and Belle appeared on the stoop. Henry scowled and pushed past her, fleeing to his room. The librarian crossed her arms beneath her breasts, apparently her new nervous tick, and swallowed the pain.

"Belle," Emma greeted warmly and wrapped the woman in a light embrace, trapping her arms between them. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have taken our issues out on you."

Belle returned the hug and sighed heavily into Emma's shoulder. She'd become intimately familiar with her body, and somehow it felt more comfortable to hug her now. They'd grown closer physically if not emotionally. "You need a shower," she responded, all levity and no anger.

Emma laughed and pulled back without releasing the shorter woman from the loose arms around her back. Belle flashed a cheeky grin up at her. "You need a bib," Emma jabbed playfully, and Belle rolled her eyes, wiping sheepishly at the dribble that escaped the corner of her mouth.

Belle turned her head and spit without stepping out of Emma's personal space, and The Savior wrinkled her nose. "Come on, really?"

Belle rolled her eyes. "Of the things we've seen and done, spitting a bodily fluid… not even a gross or smelly one, might I add… turns your stomach?"

"Well, when you put it that way, I guess it does sound silly, but it's… I mean, you're you. I'd expect that from Ruby, but it just looks worse coming from you." Emma tried and failed to control the grimace pinching her face. Belle huffed and pushed her away.

"Take a shower before your scent completely destroys my new wolf nose," Belle ordered, pointing towards the open front door, every bit the sassy librarian that kept a healthy list of maintenance requirements of her fiancée. Poor Ruby. Emma shoved her hands into her pockets and dutifully loped towards the foyer. She really, really wanted that shower, but sometimes she just needed to be obstinate.

"Emma," Belle called when she reached the first step. Leaving one foot on the stair, Emma turned to find Belle's arms crossed over ribs again, solemn and pensive once again. "It's okay," she said simply. Forgiveness granted. It'd always been like that between them, easy to forgive and forget. Maybe because they expected so little of the other in regards to emotional support or maybe because like Ruby and Regina, they intuitively sensed when the other needed a friend and when they needed left alone.

Emma nodded, flashed a little lopsided grin, and then left Belle to her own thoughts on the stoop. She breathed deeply the new scents of the world around her. Things she'd never noticed. The sweet nectar of a flower blooming down the street, the remnants of a dog that passed by a while ago with its owner, harsher chemicals of exhaust wafting in from the town, somewhere along street a fresh banana peel. Belle closed her eyes and smiled, inhaling deeply.

Almost silent footfalls registered behind her, not just in her ears but also in the subtle vibrations beneath her feet. About 105 pounds, long strides, hands sliding into jeans, long hair brushing a soft cotton shirt. Her smile spread wider. Ruby. She inhaled again, happy when her lover's musk infiltrated her nostrils, confirming what her ears already knew, what she'd sensed intuitively. Ruby felt like this all the time. So connected to the earth and the people around her. Emma's limited body must have felt torturous and very lonely.

"It's amazing, isn't it?" Ruby asked as long, thin arms wrapped around her waist and a deceptively frail-feeling body pressed into her back.

Belle leaned into her lover and raised a hand to Ruby's neck, holding it tenderly. "Yes."

"Alex finally went down. She'll probably sleep till dinner. Poor kid's exhausted." Belle nodded in agreement. "I'm going to go check on Henry," Ruby whispered into the ear she nuzzled. "And then we need to talk."

"That's cryptic," Belle responded, unable to stop the tightening of her chest.

"Good. It's not a happy subject," Ruby revealed. "Katy's being bullied. I totally broke into her phone. It's all anonymous numbers, but… some of the things that people are saying – texts, Facebook, Twitter, other things I've never even heard of," Ruby's voice deepened in the type of sorrow only a mother could feel.

"Kids?"

Ruby shrugged and pressed into her neck a little tighter. "Could be anyone. Katy gave out her number and contact information to the public when she was campaigning for the youth center, remember? All the pamphlets and flyers, everything."

"What sort of things are being said?" Belle asked, not really certain she wanted to know.

Ruby sighed and pressed a kiss to her shoulder. "Most notable are the ones pretending to be Ben and describing how else she might hurt us."

"Oh for fuck's sake, hasn't the girl been through enough?" Belle exploded.

Ruby pulled her back when she tried to squirm free. "Just think about solutions while I go make sure Henry is okay. I think Eva gave me her phone on purpose so that we'd find out, so let's do this in a way that won't make Katy feel more violated by invading her privacy, okay?" Belle nodded, ire fading to a simmer but not cooling completely.

"Okay," she agreed. Ruby wrapped a hand around her throat and tipped her head up for a kiss which Belle reciprocated eagerly. She hummed, grinning too widely to extend the kiss beyond a few seconds. Her windpipe vibrated against Ruby's fingertips, and she stroked the underutilized erogenous zone with a tender thumb.

"I've missed you," Belle elucidated and pressed into those wide, plump lips she could have spent forever kissing. "Go get our boy," Belle bade wistfully. She impatiently awaited the moment she and Ruby finally closed themselves behind a locked door. Ruby heard the need in her voice, hated denying that to her lover, squeezed her belly tighter in understanding. With one more chaste peck on Belle's wet lips, Ruby forced herself to release the tantalizingly soft body in her arms and forge a path between them and the son they'd accepted as their own a long time ago.

Ruby thought very little about what she wanted to say. Maybe nothing. Maybe Henry just needed a comforting presence. She knocked softly at his door, tuning her ears into the muffled sounds of sniffling on the other side of the wood.

"Go away," he barked.

"It's just Ruby, bud," she called back, hoping it made a difference. Shuffling. The lock clicked a moment before the door cracked. The young teen glanced around as if confirming that Ruby hadn't tricked him into seeing both her and Belle.

"Can I come in?" She asked lightly, letting him know with her intonation and body language that she harbored no anger towards him.

"I don't want to talk, Aunt Ruby," he admitted honestly. She saw the need to hold himself together in those red-rimmed brown eyes that tore at her heart.

"Then don't," she offered easily. "But… will you listen?" The door opened further. Compromise accepted, she slipped inside and made a show of locking the door behind her. Just them, no need to hide. She winced at the pile of books he'd obviously torn from the shelves, destroying the presence of Belle in his sanctuary.

He flopped on the bed and leaned against the headboard, sulking petulantly with a handheld video game instead of a book escape. Ruby folded one leg beneath her and sat on the edge of his bed, facing him but not crowding him at the foot. She chewed her lower lip. Sometimes being an adult sucked, especially when she lost all the words because they seemed trite, redundant.

"We'll make it right, Henry," she finally murmured, glancing up to find the boy staring towards his window.

"What difference does it make? Maybe if we stop fixing everything, stuff will stop happening," he seethed, using anger to cover his pain. "If people just stayed gone, it would stop hurting when they left."

"True, but I wouldn't be nearly as happy without them in my life, even temporarily," Ruby agreed, offered an alternative, prayed. Belle's abandonment cut the boy so deeply, more than anyone anticipated. They should have. She'd become his rock, his best friend.

"Why did she leave?" Henry asked, more to the universe than to Ruby. He sensed she had no answers that actually offered any sort of resolution. "Everyone leaves me. Emma didn't even want me. She should have just gotten rid of me before I was born."

Ruby exhaled harshly, completely floored by the excruciating admission. The statement churned her gut so soon after Katy's suicide attempt. "Henry, look at me." He did after a long moment of indecision. "We will never stop fighting for you. Surely, you know that. Look how hard Emma has tried every single day since you walked back into her life. Do you honestly believe that she'd go through all that pain if she just stayed because she felt guilty about giving you up?"

The words touched him, presented doubt to his theories. A start, but not nearly enough. Tears dropped onto his rosy cheeks, and he wiped at them furiously with his forearm. "It's okay to not be okay, Henry," Ruby comforted him softly and touched his shin. After he accepted the physical contact for a moment and allowed more tears to fall onto his face, she applied a minuscule bit of pressure on the leg.

"Are you okay? Because you act pretty okay all the time," he tossed in her face, but Ruby saw the defense mechanism for what it was. He believed the words and felt isolated in his misery because she sat there without tears, without trembling hands.

"It's different for me. Sometimes adults have to put their own feelings aside until things start moving forward again." Ruby tried, not really understanding the concept herself. It just sounded like a bunch of bullshit. When had this mature person emerged and overly-emotional, irresponsible Ruby disappeared? She remembered what Belle said about Katy. Kids needed to see the pain in the people they depended on, looked up to, or they felt alone.

"I hurt all the time, Henry," she admitted when he failed to respond to her previous spiel about responsibility. That got his attention. "I'm mad at Belle, too. I'm mad at Regina. I'm mad at Amelia and Katy, and sometimes I'm even mad at Alex because she requires so much attention that I don't have the energy to give." She smiled sadly, allowing the tears of her grief to join his in plain sight. "I'm not okay, Henry."

Either her confession or his unbreakable hero spirit punched through. He scrambled to the foot of the bed and threw his arms around her neck under the pretense of comforting her. Ruby knew better and straightened her leg to allow him the room to lean his head on her shoulder. He cried but not quite sobbed or wailed, little hiccups here and there, soft grunts of breath against her collarbone. She cried silently, pushing her own grief aside while sharing it with the boy.

"Are mom and… Emma going to… be okay?" He asked between jerking hiccups, and Ruby rubbed his shoulder blades in a slow, soothing circle while she gathered her answer.

"I don't know," she deadpanned, not even bothering to spout hopeful, unrealistic prattle at the boy too smart to believe it anyway. "They have a lot to work through, but I know that they still love each other and they love you and Katy and Annabel. No matter what happens between them, that's not going to change."

"I hate them," Henry seethed, and Ruby refused to correct him. If that's how he felt in that moment, she accepted it without judgment. "I hate Belle." Another pause. "You and Granny are the only people I can count on. Everyone else just leaves me."

"Henry," Ruby sighed, but nothing else followed. She just held him and let him feel.

When he finally pulled back, she wiped his tears and ran fingers through his shaggy hair. "You need a haircut," she murmured, giving him something else to focus on.

"Yeah, I guess," he rasped, not really meeting her eyes.

"Want to go with me tomorrow and get one? I need a trim and my dye job fix." She held up the faded tendrils of red that became her trademark, the only thing she really kept from her wild Ruby days. She needed it as much as she needed her guitar.

"Okay," he smiled, happy to just be included in something. Ruby returned it and ran her hand straight through his hair, making it spike out in random directions. "Can I be alone now?"

"Sure," Ruby allowed easily. "Just promise me that you'll come to me if you ever need anything, to talk or sit or whatever." She held his gaze intensely, wide eyes flicking back and forth, looking for something in his. It took a few seconds, but he got it.

"Relax, Aunt Ruby. I'm not going to do what Katy did. I haven't even thought about it. I mean, I haven't thought about it beyond wondering why and how bad she must have felt, ya know." He shrugged a little, and Ruby nodded.

"I get it, Kid. I felt that badly once, couple of times, actually," she admitted. She'd never really talked about it because everyone assumed her attempts linked directly to the situation and not a deeper-rooted glitch in her mind. "She's going to struggle with it for the rest of her life. Now that she's tried, it's always going to be a solution, even if only the back of her mind. So, she needs lots of love right."

"What do you mean? When did you…" The boy's whole world just shattered, and Ruby took a deep breath. He needed this, needed to be seen and heard and trusted and spoken to.

"Remember when the curse first broke and Billy was killed by Spencer?" He nodded. "I thought I'd done it. I chained Belle in the library and went to find the crowd that night because I couldn't cope with the thought of what I held inside of me, that darkness that consumed me sometimes."

"Your wolf?" Ruby nodded with a sad, tight grin. She loved her wolf now that she'd accepted it, loved herself. "And the other times?"

"When Cora controlled my heart," she answered honestly, and he dropped his chin to his chest.

"So you tried to leave everyone, too," he integrated the new information into the fully formed opinion of the world around him.

"No, Henry. I wasn't running from the people I loved. I was running from myself because I knew if I didn't, I'd hurt them, and I couldn't bear that thought. I'd rather be dead than hurt you or Belle or any member of this family, you understand? And, I think that's why Regina needs to stay with Granny right now. She's scared, kid. She's scared of losing control of her magic, of hurting the people she could never live without. You understand?"

He nodded. "I think I'm starting to." He raised his head and met her eyes again, the life returning to his young but wise face. "It still hurts," he admitted, fighting back tears again.

"I know," Ruby empathized. He dropped his face towards the bed again, and Ruby kissed the crown of his soft brown hair. "Want me to leave you alone for a while?" He nodded without looking up. She kissed his head again, lingering for an indeterminate amount of time. Finally, she stood and crossed to the door.

"Aunt Ruby?" She half-turned to face him expectantly. His head remained bowed and he sighed deeply before speaking again. "If I pack up my books, will you carry them to the storage room in the basement for me?"

She opened her mouth to protest, knowing he removed Belle from his life further. His head jerked up. "I just need to do this right now, okay?" He glanced at the books, looked more disgusted than he'd ever looked at The Evil Queen, and dropped his gaze to the dark blue comforter wrinkling at his knee. He expected Regina to flake, Ruby realized. It wasn't fair to him, but he'd expected it and accepted exactly who his mother was. Belle knocked him off balance, took him completely by surprise and devoured the confidence he felt in their relationship with each mile beyond the town line. He needed this.

Her mouth clicked shut, and she nodded, agreeing against the pangs in her heart. Belle shoved her off balance, too, but in the absence of the crutch of Belle's love, she'd found someone inside herself that surprised her, someone strong and sure and steady. Focused. Belle needed to go, and she'd needed her to go. But, the kids… Ruby shook her head.

"I'll come get you for dinner," she murmured and pulled the door shut behind her before she sank completely into the pit of anger at this entire fucked up situation. She glanced to the other side of the balcony and found Belle standing at Alex's door, gazing wondrously at the little girl napping in her bed after such a long few days. Quietly, she traversed the rounded path that looked over the foyer from the front of the house and led to the small balcony over the front door.

Belle leaned into her almost before she ventured close enough to catch her weight against her chest. Ruby wrapped her arms beneath Belle's, adding extra support to her aching breasts. They swayed back and forth slightly. Ruby rested her cheek against Belle's soft hair and sighed contentedly.

"Ruby?" Belle said after a moment. The deep concerned in her voice sounded warning sirens in the wolf's mind. She hummed a response, and turned her lips into Belle's temple. "Are we being selfish by bringing more children into this world when we've clearly failed to protect Alexandra from this pain?"

Ah. That. That question she handled well. "The magic in our necklaces wouldn't give them to us if it wasn't right. It's the magic of The Truest Believer, remember? Emma gave it ground rules, only if we were ready."

She kissed the side of Belle's head again. "Plus," she mumbled against her temple before lifting her mouth, "this world is full of so much hurt that it's impossible to protect them from all of it. The important thing is that we're going to teach her how to survive it and take care of herself and those she loves. Sparing her pain is important, but not nearly as important as picking her up and letting her know that she's not alone when something or someone hurts her."

Leaning her head against Ruby's bony shoulder, Belle smiled up at her. "I thought I was supposed to be the smart one," she joked lovingly.

Ruby grinned. "I have my moments." She kissed Belle's forehead. "And I learned from the best."

Belle hummed her approval of that statement. "Granny does have a special ability."

Bethany chose that moment to stumble from Annabel's nursery beside Alex's room, ashen and anxious. They raised their heads, confused more than concerned. Bethany straightened her shirt and spine, gathering what dignity she had left from the incident. "Ah, Regina's here," she informed them.

Ruby lunged for the nursery faster than Belle's big brain functioned, fully expecting a knock down drag out with The Evil Queen. The wolf stopped abruptly, and Belle bumped into her back, barely moving the physically superior creature. Regina certainly had visited, but which Regina remained to be seen. She stood near the window, clutching the infant close to her chest, either a shield from them or a shield from the pain in her heart.

"Please allow me a moment with my daughter," Regina pleaded politely.

Ruby crossed her arms. "Only if you let me stay in here with you."

"I'd prefer Belle's company," Regina compromised in a small voice that told them she knew she held no position of bargaining aside from the baby in her arms. She looked broken.

"It's alright, Sweetheart," Belle assured her fiancée even as she heard the pounding of Ruby's heart increase.

"Belle, she has tried to kill you twice in as many days," the wolf protested, but Belle's sharp glare shut her mouth and sent her out the door with her tail tucked. Belle closed the door softly, mindful of the sleeping children and leaned against it warily.

"Did I injure you terribly?" Regina asked, eyes glancing to the burned shoulder beneath one of Ruby's baggy t-shirts she wore to bed sometimes.

"Nothing I can't handle," Belle clipped. "How about yours?" She nodded towards Regina.

Regina sighed her relief and moved to the rocking chair. "I believe I'll survive," she answered the question nonchalantly, and they shared a smile. No one else quite understood their relationship, but they both followed the darkness of their powers. They checked the other when it got too close.

"Thank you, for stopping me. I'm afraid Granny would not have arrived in time without your interference," Regina admitted and then smiled cheekily. "Your powers have become quite impressive."

Belle laughed. "Just say it. I was totally going to kick your ass."

Regina sucked her upper teeth and glared playfully. "I think I'd have made a comeback in the end." They shared another light moment before Regina's features darkened, and she returned her focus to the infant in her arms. "I imagine Emma will not be pleased with this arrangement."

Belle shrugged. "Annabel's your daughter, too. You should see her when you want to. What happened at the diner? Emma looked really upset when she came home." She wanted answers, but if Regina refused them, she'd not push her. Regina needed their support, too, and if they kept pushing her into Evil Queen mode, no one benefitted.

"She's truly not herself without her memories of me," Regina answered vaguely without taking her eyes from her daughter's face. She brushed a hand over a shock of black hair, her hair, and kissed the infant's forehead. Belle allowed the silence to stretch with the passing minutes.

A commotion outside caught Belle's sensitive ears, and she sighed apologetically. "Emma knows you're here," she informed her friend.

Regina nodded and stood. She kissed Annabel's head again and murmured, "Until next time, my beautiful girl," as she crossed to the crib and replaced the little body in the rightful spot. She set a plushy orange monkey over the girl's arm for a sleeping companion and covered her tiny body quickly before she noticed the absence of her mother's warmth.

"Thank you," she said graciously.

"Anytime you want to see her, Regina, just call me. I'll sit with you," Belle offered, her heart tugging aggressively at the thought of a mother denied the right to see her child, especially when she'd done nothing to harm that child.

Regina's eyes softened dramatically, tears shimmering in the dim light of the covered window. "Granny will be sending dinner soon. Please make certain Henry eats. He loses his appetite when he's upset, but he's never been able to refuse my lasagna so far. I made it for him." Belle blinked rapidly and wiped at the wetness suddenly on her face. Regina hurt so much, needed so much attention of her own right now, but whatever Emma had said or done slapped some sort of sense into her.

"I will. Emma, too," she promised. Regina tipped her head gratefully and then disappeared in a swirl of light blue magic. Light Magic, the magic of love.

Belle gasped. Regina literally split in half. One light, one dark, even in the channeling of magic. She touched the pendant between her breasts beneath Ruby's shirt and bowed her chin to her chest as heavy but silent tears fell onto her hand. She longed for that earlier time just after the wedding when they'd all been relatively at ease, working through their issues, before Ben and Jacob (and Katy, a voice in the back of her mind added) terrorized them. She'd been living at the library and dealing with the surfacing trauma of murdering her friends and enemies alike, but they'd been happy. They'd been happy enough to create two more little lives growing in her unworthy womb.

How could she possibly have reassured her children that Emma and Regina would survive this, too, when she failed to find enough hope in her heart to believe it herself?


	29. Acceptance

So, I'll admit, the reviews to the last chapter had me scratching my head. I rechecked the posting three times to make sure I'd not put up the wrong document. Regina and Emma weren't paired with anyone. *scratches head* Also, the backhanded comment about Tink a couple chapters ago referenced their time in The Enchanted Forest, not since they've been in Storybrooke. Don't go hating on characters I haven't even had a chance to introduce properly yet. Apologies if I failed to make that clear. We like Tink, Tink keeps the diner running in Ruby's absence with the wolves.

Anyway, this is about the halfway point in this behemoth. You wonder why the first half was so RB oriented… well, because the second half is SQ oriented. I fixed the easiest couple first. This entire story is about healing of the entire family. Those of you who have read my other stories know that I am not really influenced by bad reviews, I just tend to get super excited that people are really into it and just do what I want… soooooo… have some smut with this double post of awesomeness. (I'm super in love with this chapter)

Enjoy, my lovelies and keep up the deliciously tense reviews. Means I'm doing my job if you care so passionately. Also, about three more chapters (including this one) until we start the SQ portion of this tale if anyone is wondering. Second chapter will be up later today.

Song: Till I Fall Asleep by Jayme Dee (because it's beautiful), Up Here by Terri Naomi (Because… haters)

* * *

><p>Belle rubbed her face as she walked into the room she shared with Ruby at the mansion. Her hands hit her thighs, but she stayed still, staring at the bed that offered up so many memories, so many emotions, so much pain. They needed to move into their own place. She needed to move, she corrected in her endlessly cycling brain. <em>Shut up<em>, she ordered her thoughts. _Just stop. _

Determined to distract herself while Ruby showered, she snagged the book from her nightstand that apparently hadn't been moved the entire time she'd been away from Storybrooke, from Ruby, from the pain she so desperately hoped still wandered aimlessly in the vast world she'd only begun to explore. She caressed the faded dark brown cover, remembering the contents, allowing the meaning of its placement to warm the coldness in her heart. Ruby truly never stopped believing she'd return, she left it there for her. Opening the book to the first page, she ignored the daunting feeling that those whispering shadows of grief followed her home where love and understanding awaited her.

"Belle?" Ruby called from the doorway, toweling her hair with another wrapped around her thin body and tucked between her breasts. Belle stared at the book, but her eyes stayed focused on one point and a warning flag ran up a pole in Ruby's head. Belle's eyes moved faster than any human being could have possibly digested the information when she read. She stared at a solitary word without blinking when she tried to escape the overbearing and inexhaustive thoughts that often plague her brain. No one but Ruby really understood how destructive and terrifying Belle's thoughts really were to the genius, the sleepless nights and anxiety attacks and migraines. She processed information faster than most people acknowledged that there was information to absorb, and it trapped her with effects as toxic as Rumpelstiltskin's brainwashing.

"Belle," she tried again, a bit more forcefully. Wild blue eyes jerked to hers, and Ruby tossed the fluffy blue towel towards the hamper and closed the door, shutting out the rest of the house.

"What?" Belle snapped. "I'm reading."

Ruby smirked and slid onto the bed on her side, long wet hair falling over her chest and shoulders. She snagged the book, closed it, and tossed it back to the nightstand. Belle searched her face with those tempestuous eyes, an animal cornered and ready to fight, run, or freeze. Ruby sighed, pulling back immediately before Belle slammed her emotional doors and locked the shutters.

"Did the kids go down okay?" She asked the safe question and leaned forward, kissing the side of Belle's bent knee, a beautiful leggy barrier between them.

"Bethany took some time with Annabel, but Alexandra nodded off pretty quickly once I'd started her story." She tucked an arm beneath her breasts, clad comfortably in nothing but Ruby's old, ratty work shirt (that probably swallowed her naturally thin lover) that she'd found in the back of the closet. Resting the elbow of her other arm atop, she pressed scarred knuckles to her mouth.

"Henry and Emma?" Ruby pried each reluctant finger loose slowly. Belle shook her head, shaking a few tears loose from her quickly filling eyes. They'd come home for dinner, but Henry acted up so badly towards Belle that Emma decided it best for them to get out for a while.

Belle sniffed and bowed her head, wrapping the second arm around her ribs protectively. "She called. They're staying at Amelia's house for the moment since she's still in the hospital."

"Good, that's good. That boy needs some attention from her." Ruby loved the idea of them camping out in front of Amelia's fireplace, roasting marshmallows and dissociating from the fucked up situation that served as the reality for their lives. "Baby," Ruby started, but the harsh sound that ripped from Belle's throat as the flood finally broke the levy stopped her cold.

"I had to go, Ruby," she shrieked so loudly that Ruby turned her ear towards the door to listen for any signs that she'd roused the children.

"I know. You were hunted and hurting and you were scared for our children. I get it," Ruby empathized, checking her own anger for the moment. Belle went through hell that night with Henry. Though he basically said everything that everyone else wanted to say, the way he'd screamed at her and cut at her venomously with the intention of causing more pain crossed so many boundaries that Emma and Ruby eventually removed him from the house by physical force. It wasn't a very pretty night in the mayoral mansion.

"You don't get it, Ruby!" Belled yelled and pushed off the bed, taking a few steps towards the wall. She stared at it so long that Ruby almost thought she'd retreated back to her thoughts without realizing that she stood in their bedroom. Slowly, she pulled herself up in bed and knelt primly, grappling with the urge to reach out to her wounded lover.

Finally, Belle spun slowly. An icy deadness eclipsed her eyes, and she shook her head, trying to clear the numbing haze. "I'm sick, Ruby. I have a legitimate misfire in my brain that I'm uncertain can be corrected. Those other reasons were valid factors, but they weren't why I left. I didn't need a trip across the country to find something in our love worth believing in."

Ruby swallowed carefully, unable to blink. "Then why?" She asked softly.

"Because when I woke up in this very bed, I wanted to kill them. I wanted to set this town aflame and watch it burn so that no one would ever threaten our family again. I understand exactly where Regina's mind is right now. Violence is much easier than fixing everything. It's why she erased Emma's memories. Something hurt her, so she eliminated it. It's logical and destructive, but it's the way she thinks and it's usually the way I feel. I left the safety of the cabin that day to tell you that I was pregnant, to tell you that… what you did," she swallowed the pooling saliva but kept her eyes carefully pointed towards the comforter.

"Belle, I'm sorry. I'll never…"

"I know," she cut Ruby's apology short. They stared at each other for a moment, and Ruby believed her, believed that Belle had truly found forgiveness in her giant heart for her deplorable loss of control that day. "I came to tell you that I wanted to find a way to move past that. I wanted to help you because that was the logical option. Love has never been an issue between us or Emma and Regina, but we're all screwed up individually and that gets in the way. Logically, I knew everything could work out since we had something to work towards."

Wrapping her arms around her ribs again, she dropped her eyes back to the cover. "But when I woke up, and I saw you sitting there next to me, I wanted to kill you, too." Belle fell silent, allowing the shock of the words to sink into Ruby's scrambling brain. She glanced up again to find Ruby's eyes suddenly distant but honest as the weight of that brutal statement settled onto her heart. Ruby heard the truth in the words.

"Of all the things we've done to each other, emotionally… sexually…" They both recalled some terrifying animalistic nights, close calls. One in particular stood out to Ruby, the one when she'd accidentally choked Belle until she passed out while she fucked her fast and hard with a strap-on without any regards to her pleasure, safety, or emotional wellbeing. "Even that night," Belle whispered and touched her throat, following Ruby's thought as easily as if they'd never been parted.

"I'd never felt like an object until you held me against that freezer." Another pause for Belle to swallow the result of her latest pregnancy symptom. She met Ruby's eyes again, so open and honest that Ruby thought she dreamed the entire conversation.

"I liked it when you hurt me. It made everything quiet." Ruby knew Belle meant her thoughts, her memories. Hauntings might have been a more accurate word. "And it was my choice. That …wasn't. I know you've used me before to quell the anger, but I liked it too much to care that it wasn't about me or us or even you, but your wolf. We used each other. I'm not really sure I knew how to be anything but an object at that point, but we were working on it. When you stopped yourself at Emma and Regina's wedding, I thought… I thought maybe we… I." Belle swallowed the liquid in her mouth and hugged herself tighter. She struggled still, in her heart, with the words that Ruby needed to hear.

"You made me believe that I could be more that night, and then you ripped that away from me. I tried to forget what you said to me, to simply forget that you'd made me feel more human than I'd ever been. For the sake of our children, I was willing to become an object again. I was trained to be one, and being anything else felt wrong. It only felt right when it hurt. I needed your darkness to make me feel right."

Ruby opened her mouth to speak, to tell her how wrong she was to feel that way about herself, but she closed it, opting for listening. Belle seemed oblivious to her internal wrestling match. She swallowed again, gathering her thoughts or maybe her resolve.

"But, I opened my eyes that day with enough anger pent up to blow Storybrooke off the map. And then…" she laughed through a burst of wet exhalation and raised her eyes. "You smiled at me." She shrugged, head moving back and forth like she herself was unable to grasp the concept of that simple gesture.

"You smiled at me, Ruby, and my entire world turned around." She licked her lips, pulling them into her mouth with her tongue and shook her head again, tiny little movements to and fro. "I wasn't the object anymore. You were mine. You turned your back on your people for me, attacked the hospital, found the strength to transform in broad daylight. You'd have done anything for me. You were mine. Do you understand? I'd done exactly what he'd done to me. Why shouldn't I? I learned from the master, right?"

"Belle," Ruby finally breathed and rose onto her knees, walking towards the edge of the bed. She halted when her knees touched the harder strip along the side of the mattress and searched for something to say.

"Just let me finish," Belle pleaded. Ruby nodded but remained as close to her lover as possible. "I left to find a way to make myself right. I knew there would be consequences, and I accept them and the amount of work required to fix them. But I'm not sorry I left. Rather I break a few hearts than kill someone, which was exactly what would have happened. I felt if before Breck and I felt it then.

"I spent the first days of my trip holed up in a hotel room, pretty much delirious from the nightmares and the flashbacks. I'm not even certain how long I stayed there. When I wasn't cowered in a corner from the fear of my own thoughts, I curled up into the smallest ball possible on the bed or floor. Because that's how I felt, small. Every time I tried to stand, I remembered that stupid, beautiful smile and I fell down again. I grieved," she finished, looking almost as surprised as Ruby.

"I grieved," she repeated, rolling the words around her mouth. "It should have been for all of the people I murdered. The child I killed, my child." She touched her stomach.

"But it wasn't because I could live with those choices, the people I took from this world didn't haunt me out there. I grieved for that smile because a part of me… because I killed that smile." She panted hysterically, a wildness in her eyes that Ruby hadn't expected. "I killed your smile, Ruby."

Unable to stand the distance anymore, Ruby grabbed her arms and pulled her bodily until their torsos flushed. She expected Belle to fight, struggle, scream, cry… something other than stand there, a willing victim to what she believed she deserved. Ruby wrapped her arms around shaking shoulders, not from tears. Just shaking, like the rest of Belle's body.

"You didn't kill my smile, Belle. You gave it life. You gave me life, and honestly, as angry as I was, your leaving gave me the strength I needed to finally stand up and stop hiding behind my wolf. To stop denying my wolf. My wolf is not something I should apologize for or be ashamed of. That's the key to control. The key to containing my wolf isn't controlling it, but giving up control, just like I gave up all the control I thought I'd had over my life, over us. I allowed it to become a part of me. I'd always felt violated by it because I'd never wanted it. I was _its_ object, its plaything, but now… I'm glad you left."

That got her attention. Belle jerked her eyes up once more, but this time, they stayed locked with Ruby's chocolate brown. "Was I depressed? Yes. Was I pissed? Yes. Do I still feel those things? A little bit. No one likes to be abandoned, especially when they're hunted by a psychopath. But, you're right. You had to leave. You had to leave for both of us. We were in each other's way. Everyone else can be mad at you if they want, but I feel it, Belle. I feel you again. I carried your heart for two months, and I never once felt you. I tried but…"

Ruby brushed frizzy hair from Belle's wet face and smiled. "I feel you now," she whispered, the words barely audible even to their sensitive hearing.

"I feel you, too," Belle returned just as softly.

Ruby bumped her forehead to her lover's and held it there as she reached between them and loosened her towel. "Ruby," Belle protested, tried to pull away. Ruby grabbed her wrists and held her close.

"Touch me, Belle. Touch me how you want to touch me, not the dark sorceress or the object or the curious woman who stumbled upon a lonely country wolf in a diner. Those are a part of you, but they're not _you_. I want you, Belle French, mother of my children, love of my life, insane genius librarian to touch me like you finally know what you want because I think that you do." They both glanced down Ruby's scarred and battered body.

"Touch your wolf," Ruby encouraged breathlessly, already flushed from the desire racing through her veins. She unfurled a hesitant hand, pressed a kiss into Belle's palm and then guided the soft fingertips over her bumpy sternum, between her tiny breasts, over every jagged ridge of white tissue standing out on her body between her throat and her destination.

Two sighs filled the room when Belle's fingers grazed the smoothness of her freshly groomed mound. Brown and blue eyes flew open wildly at the first caress of the liquid heat already blooming in the velvety pleats. Ruby's eyes fluttered though Belle only held a hand against her.

"Make love to me for the first time as Belle French, and accept the darkness as a part of your soul as I've accepted mine. I'm a wolf. I am the wolf," Ruby stated without reservation or shame or any of the usual accompanying feelings of guilt that she used to associate with that facet of her personality. "And you're a murderer." Belle gasped at the disinterested tone used with such a harsh and ugly truth.

"No objects, no ownership," Ruby continued, barely stopping her hips before she pressed herself into Belle's hand. They weren't there yet. "I accept you as you are. I want you as you are. I love you as you are. Your incredible compassion, your hauntingly beautiful darkness." Before Belle ran, this moment never stood a chance. Ruby ran from the darkness in Belle, afraid to let herself fully admit the undeniable similarities in them. She hid behind her friendship with Regina, pretended that no darkness touched her beautiful lover. She cowered in the face of what she and Belle might have become if she'd let them. Ruby stopped cowering.

Belle barely jerked the shirt to her chin before Ruby's tongue circled her hypersensitive nipple. She gasped at the mixture of pain and pleasure and grabbed Ruby's head. "No biting. They're really sore," she instructed even as she pulled Ruby tighter against the aching mound.

The wolf nodded and dragged her tongue from the swell of her breast to her collarbone. Adrenaline zinged through her body when teeth and a hot tongue latched onto her throat, and Belle embraced it, embraced what Ruby had given her with her terrifying confession. Freedom.

Unafraid, she shoved Ruby onto the bed, reveling in the shock that registered in Ruby's wide eyes. She licked her lips and devoured Belle's body as the woman stood before her, naked, wanting, the smoky darkness of primal desire in her glacier blue eyes. Belle allowed her an extended gaze and then raised one knee to the bed, revealing the apex of her thighs. Ruby licked her lips, chest heaving. She had allowed the hair to grow back, neatly trimmed in a little triangle, the way Belle preferred it rather than smooth.

Ruby moaned when Belle's heat joined her own, the slight weight of her lover straddling her hips adding pressure in all the right places. Heavy, swollen breasts dragged across her stomach, enlarged nipples tickling the ridges of her ribs. Belle's mouth descended upon hers in a desperate, heavy kiss. The world around them faded, Emma and Regina and their whole fucked up clan. Nothing mattered more than the shared heat of their mouths and muffled moans as their bodies slid together, forging one being as their souls had already done.

A whimper vibrated Ruby's throat when Belle's lips disappeared. An unrestrained cry replaced it the moment teeth clamped onto her throat. She thought briefly of waking the baby girls sleeping down the hall, but that, too, faded away beneath the hot palm on her breast and wet tongue soothing the sting of teeth imprints at her throat.

"Make them quiet," Belle moaned huskily, lips brushing her jaw. Her thoughts, Ruby deciphered easily. Belle desired to be set free.

Ruby followed her lover's lead without missing beat and flipped Belle onto her back. Delicate nails trailed over the scars marring her back, sending a wave of goose bumps over the sensitive flesh. Teeth clanked, tongues slipped and slithered in a never-ending dance. No fear swelled in Ruby's chest, that shaking need to maintain control. No mistrust swam in Belle's smoky eyes. No second guessing.

Belle cried out when three fingers entered her without warning, without preparation. No, not a cry. This was deeper, more primal, and when Ruby thrust into the slick walls again, the sound repeated. Something awakened in Belle, something driven by instinct, need, lust, love. Wild blue eyes locked with an enchanted brown as she shared the very fast but small orgasm with her partner.

"Bite me," Belle ordered.

"What?" Ruby almost stopped, but velvet walls gripped fingers, urging her forward. Fingers pushed into long, damp brown hair, and Ruby thought for a moment that Belle wanted something softer, something closer to the gentle love they used to make before the wolf got in the way. Something they'd done before they accepted who they were and exactly what they wanted. They loved the carnal mindlessness of losing their civility at the hands of the other.

Belle jerked sharply on the strands in her fist and pulled Ruby's mouth to her neck. "Bite me, Wolf," Belle ordered.

"Belle," Ruby warned her, fingers stilling between her legs.

"No ownership," Belle reminded her and raised her hips, fucking herself on Ruby's fingers. "I want your mark on me. I accept you, too, Ruby Lucas. Just as you are, and I want the world to know." She jerked her hips upwards, sighing into the gentle self-stimulation.

"Bite me," she demanded a bit more forcefully. Ruby loved biting, loved marking her. No holding back, not this night, not this moment. She wanted all of her.

Ruby growled, unafraid of herself as the wolf clawed inside of her. She embraced herself and sank her teeth into the supple flesh supplicated before her. Nails ripped at the scars on her back, and Belle stilled outwardly while the taut muscles within pulsed and squeezed painfully in climax. Ruby remembered too late her missing fingernails and pulled at the skin still clamped between her teeth, alleviating her pain by causing Belle's.

A hollow sound of pain and pleasure rang in their ears as Belle arched from the bed with the crash and roll of her third orgasm slamming into her a few breaths after the second one as Ruby fucked her straight through it, taking her to the highest peak possible.

Ruby stayed with her and supported both of them with a strong arm around Belle's back, sucking and pulling at the bruised and aching skin captured in her jaws. Belle clutched her closer, nails pressing crescents into her back. A predator and her prey, but Ruby wasn't sure which of them fulfilled what role in that moment. Belle jerked again, sweating and flushing and pressing into her with each painful arc of her back timed perfectly with each wave of fresh pleasure searing the excruciating thoughts from her mind. She looked possessed. She looked beautiful. The thought slapped Ruby in the face, and she pulled back to fully observe the once timid woman in her moment of true freedom.

Freedom from herself.

Belle barely began the descent from oblivion before her lips found Ruby's again. The wolf lowered them to the bed, reveling in the feeling of sweat-slick skin sticking as they slid and rolled against each other. They'd never get close enough, not nearly enough to feel as close as their souls. Belle pinned her arms above her head, thighs clenching and releasing against her hips. Ruby moaned and pressed into the delicious torture of stimulation a few centimeters off to actually take her to the precipice of oblivion that Belle seemed caught in.

Nails dug into her wrists. Her body throbbed to be touched, taken, marked. "Belle," she managed around the sloppy, demanding kiss. "I need you."

Without a verbal response, Belle scooted lower and captured an agonizingly taut nipple in her mouth. Ruby jerked in response, finally. Finally, stimulation in the right areas. The primal howls within her soul stretched against her insides, churning and swirling, begging to be unleashed in the hands of a woman who had embraced them already in her soul. It felt like the uncontrollable desire to run, feel the forest become one with her senses, except this was Belle.

Belle inspired this feeling, this simultaneously familiar and foreign yearning. She'd never yearned for another as much as she yearned to run. So, she ran straight into Belle's receptive arms. Snagging her hair in a similar treatment she'd received, Ruby removed the torturous stimulation from her nipple and forced Belle to meet her eyes. No fear, just desire. A need to please, to fulfill.

"Now," Ruby growled, and Belle pushed against the bed until her body rested between Ruby's parted thighs. Already, she glistened in the faint moonlight streaming through the window.

Belle inhaled deeply, entranced by the deeper musk she'd previously missed due to her inferior mortal senses. The need to taste that new scent overwhelmed her, and she moaned louder than her lover when it exploded over her newly improved taste buds. Stiffening the muscle, she plunged her tongue inside those already tightening walls and lapped greedily of the undiscovered flavor she found there.

Ruby bucked and squirmed, and Belle tossed an arm over her bony hips to steady her enough to keep up with them if not stop their dance completely. A string of indecipherable curses fell from her lips followed by a series of deep, raspy moans surely loud enough to alert anyone awake in the house to her obvious ecstasy. She cared nothing for their comfort. She'd waited so long to share this connection with her fiancée, her salvation. She'd waited so long to be seen, truly seen. Now that she had, she refused to hold anything back anymore.

Belle replaced her tongue with three fingers, forcing her open despite the powerful clench of her already shaking muscles. With a crook of her fingers and flick of her tongue over her clit, Ruby flew apart and jumped off that terrifying cliff with Belle as her only tether to reality.

Maybe it wasn't reality. Maybe they'd both gone insane and dangled over that edge. Numb. They'd committed suicide together and now resided in a blissfully frozen limbo where nothing existed beyond this moment. As quickly as the thought arose, it shattered when Belle slid up her body. Reality slammed into them and desperate hands sought out the comfort of the warm body that housed the soul to which they'd never get close enough to feel completely whole.

Ruby accepted Belle's weight atop her eagerly and entrapped her in strong arms as lips descended upon hers once more. She tasted herself on them, proof that they weren't dreaming. Belle dropped onto her chest and burrowed into her neck, panting and shaking in tandem with her utterly dumbfounded lover. Ruby stared at the ceiling, waiting for the backlash, waiting for the regret that sometimes came when they'd gotten too rough, which sparked guilt. She waited for the urge to slink off into a darkened corner and hide from her true self.

What came, however, was a tiny sniffle. "Ruby?" Belle whimpered. There it was. Cold fingers gripped Ruby's heart. Belle regretted it.

"Yeah," she answered, forcing the word out with no air left in her frozen lungs.

"It's okay if I still cry, right?" Belle asked, voice strained like she held back the emotion.

Ruby craned her head to the side and studied Belle's face. The librarian rolled to the side and stared down at her, face and eyes still open and honest and _there._ No regrets, just an overwhelming abundance of emotions that generally exploded within Belle after sex. Ruby suspected that the emotions correlated with her lack of racing thoughts than the act, but if Belle felt good and wanted to purge her tears, she supported that. It's just who she was. "Yeah," Ruby whispered, mouth spreading slowly in a smile. No regrets.

Belle returned the smile and kissed her softly, tasting of Ruby and the salt of tears. "That was incredible," she murmured against Ruby's lips, and the wolf hummed in response.

"You're incredible," Ruby whispered reverently, tracing Belle's lips with a thumb. "I love you."

"I love you, too," Belle answered easily and pressed a kiss to the pad of Ruby's thumb.

It wasn't forced as it sometimes had been. No awkwardness followed. Just the mingled pants of their recovery and two wildly thumping hearts, giddy to travel the new path they'd uncovered in the dense wilderness of their often painful journey.

Belle panted a few seconds and then pressed her lips to the teeth imprint at Ruby's throat. "Ruby," she murmured, "make love to me."

In an instant, Belle's back hit the comforter softly, the fall controlled by Ruby's superior strength. Tender kisses fell over her chest, slid down her stomach, as they gave into each other again without the wolf and sorceress taking charge. Ruby's mouth found her flushed center, and a hand fisted the blanket by her head, the other buried in silken brown and red locks. Acceptance of themselves came easily that night, and they spent the rest of it surrounded by breathy sighs and harsh gasps, strengthening each other for the challenging days to come.


	30. Screwed Up

As promised.

Warning: Like two paragraphs of non-con event, nothing graphic and not even enough to make me feel not silly putting up this warning, but there ya go.

Enjoy!

Song: Let Her Go by Jasmine Thompson

* * *

><p>"Ruby, will you lick these," Belle asked, holding out two envelopes. Ruby glanced below where Tink worked on installing the frame for the kitchen door while she held the top in place.<p>

"Uhh, what is these and can it wait a couple of minutes? Why don't you lick them?" She queried distractedly.

Belle looked at the innocent little envelopes and blanched. "My stomach doesn't like the taste of the adhesive. I can't even think about it. Since Bethany decided to postpone her procedure again, I wrote Paul and Sharmila," she explained nonchalantly, but Ruby's attention suddenly spiked. "I think her fear more than our situation prevents her from completing it."

"Tink, you got that on good enough for me to let go?" She asked her diner employee turned minor home repair buddy while Granny deemed Regina too unstable to open their doors to the general populace. Tink needed the money, and Ruby wanted to keep her. She worked hard and rarely complained and hadn't set anything on fire since the new diner opened, which had only been a week ago, but still… for Tink, that was a damn fine stretch.

"Yeah, go be jealous," Tink ribbed her boss without looking up. Ruby rolled her eyes and swaggered to the middle of the foyer to do just that.

"You wrote Sharmila?" She tossed, trying to be nonchalant.

Belle grinned up at her with twinkling eyes. "Well, I wrote her, but I addressed it to the casino because I'm uncertain how else to reach her. I hope she receives it," she explained, not the slightest bit perplexed by Ruby's obvious discomfort with her desire to remain in touch with the high-class call girl who escorted her around Vegas. She'd not even realized the woman attempted to seduce her – the little touches, the throaty laughter, the smoky gazes. At the time, she'd only seen a highly intelligent woman fully focused on her, and yes, it felt good to be the center of someone's world for a few hours, but sex lingered farther from her mind than anything else. She quested for healing, not liaisons. Although, their liaison the previous night restored something, healed something she couldn't quite figure out yet.

"I'm sending Paul and Tammy a picture of Alexandra," she added, clearly anxious that Ruby might have objected to perfect strangers having a photo of their daughter.

"You can trust them, right?" Ruby checked calmly.

Belle nodded. "I spent two weeks with him cooped in a space smaller than my closet and never once felt threatened. He's a good man, and his family is beautiful. Plus, I promised to let him know when I made it home safely." Ruby nodded, accepting Belle's judgment easily.

She snagged the envelopes, gave them both a good lick with a snicker. "Your copious spit would come in handy right now."

Belle tried to be offended, but Ruby's sweet smile and easy-going demeanor set her teeth on edge. "That's it? No longwinded lectures about strangers or cultivating a friendship with a woman who is obviously very attractive?"

Ruby pressed her lips together and shook her head, tussling the streak of red freshly redone that morning over her shoulder. "Nope."

"Why?" Belle asked, still skeptical even as she sealed the letters.

"Dude," Tink exclaimed. "Just take the damn win, give her a kiss, and let it go. Why do you people have to analyze everything to death? She's not upset because you're here carrying her babies, kissing her mouth, eating her pancakes, and wearing a mark on your neck that looks like you were attacked… well, by a wolf, not Sharmila's. God, for a genius, you're thick."

Everyone within earshot slowly emerged to stare at Tinker Bell. Katy and Batch raised from their quietly perched positions over plates at the island where they'd been since they'd grown bored of pounding the drums in Katy's room, Ruby and Belle stared down at her. Even Amelia peaked around the corner of the living room because she simply wouldn't listen and stay put on the couch since she insisted that she leave the hospital to support Emma.

"Okay," Belle deadpanned, surprised by the outburst but not angry. "Thank you for licking my envelopes," she said, still a bit unsure of the moment.

Tink rolled her eyes again. "And for the love of your perky tits, please stop saying that," she snapped in frustration, smacked her hand on the door frame, and sat back in a sweaty triumph. "Haaah," she sighed audibly and glanced up to Ruby. "Door's fixed. Should I start on the cabinet in the kitchen or take down the dry wall that needs replaced?"

"Uhh," Ruby sputtered.

Tink shrugged. "Cabinet it is," she decided for herself and pushed to her feet, the tool belt at her waist falling over the cute denim overalls cockeyed in a sexy farm girl sort of way.

"You need to get laid," Katy harassed the young waitress only a few years older than her.

"You offering, Blondie?" Tink lobbed flirtatiously. Katy flushed under the attention, and Ruby's anger at the remark receded at the glowing grin on her niece's lip. Katy trusted Tink, apparently, and accepted the harmless bantering and warm attention for what it was. Now that Ruby thought on it, Tink and Katy pretty much always interacted in such a manner. It provided some normalcy for the teen to flirt with those she deemed safe. Batch grinned between the two women with almost identical sandy blonde hair, and Ruby allowed the rest of her protectiveness to melt away. Two of the toughest teens she'd ever stumbled across smiled at the same time. Something was working.

"Katyline," Belle laughed and rubbed her forehead, alleviating the pressure there, probably reaching the same conclusion as her lover 10 seconds sooner. At least she'd stopped beating those damn drums for the moment.

Alex saved her big sister from a lecture when she shrieked through the house, screaming holy terror and moving as quickly as her little legs allowed. Everyone froze for one split second until they realized that Emma chased the toddler like a moderately fast zombie, and Alex laughed in delight when she got caught and gobbled up for zombie food. Emma bit at her neck, teeth covered with her lips for protection, and then dropped to the floor as the girl fell and gnawed at her belly, grunting and snarling for the pleasure of the tiny zombie enthusiast. 24 hours had passed since her throw down with Regina at the diner, and since then, she'd been the model parent, flinging herself into healing their children.

In Regina's physical absence and the lack of memories, Emma seemed relatively content with her life. Occasionally, a yearning crossed her eyes when she stumbled across Belle and Ruby having a moment or just a simple touch in passing, those sweet stolen moments of lovers. When that expression eclipsed her smile, she disappeared to the back porch for a while, to cook on the grill or stare at the darkness. Sometimes, Henry sat with her, hurting as much as her and avoiding Belle.

"Wolf!" Alex called, tearing Ruby from her musings. "Wolf, save me!"

Ruby howled and play tackled Emma carefully away from the tiny figure squirming beneath her. They wrestled for a minute, and then wolf versus zombie commenced. Belle rubbed her forehead again, wishing not for the first time that she felt comfortable taking a medication with the pups growing inside of her. She never realized how horrible her migraines felt until she simply saw no alternative but to grin and bear it.

"I'd have run, too," Tink blurted distastefully as she stopped her work to watch the shenanigans of the Ruby and Emma comedy show. Belle clicked her tongue and tried not to take offense to the blunt jab. She'd received those a lot since Emma and Ruby claimed their proper bodies. "Glad you're back," she tossed like it was nothing more than a remark about the weather and returned to the kitchen. Belle squinted after her, never fully understanding Tink's personality, but Ruby liked her well enough and trusted her to watch over the diner.

She blissfully thanked the doorbell when it rang, providing a valid reason to escape the loud foyer. Austin waited on the other side, a box of something in his hand. "What is that?" She blurted at the boy, feeling her stomach turn immediately.

"It's…" he started, but Belle threw up her hand.

"I know what they are," she snapped over her shoulder on her way to the bathroom in the foyer. The poor boy looked so confused that Ruby took pity on him and pulled him into the house. He probably wanted to see Katy anyway. She flipped the note taped to the top of the box open, a pale green check slip from the diner. It read two words and one letter, and Ruby's face changed dramatically.

She pointed towards the kitchen, and he slipped away lest Belle returned to yell at him some more. "What's that?" Emma asked.

Ruby extended the box slowly. "Chocolate chip cookies with cinnamon," she mumbled, smelling the food as easily as Belle but without the nausea.

"Throw them out. They're probably cursed," Emma snapped, mistrusting the seemingly sweet gesture from the woman she never wanted to see again.

"G-g-granny said to t-tell that she w-w-w-watched her the whole t-t-time," Austin stuttered from the kitchen door, finally understanding the cryptic message Granny charged him with delivering.

Vexed, Emma grabbed the box and raised the check slip to find, "_I'm sorry. R," _scrawled in Regina's elegant script. The muscles in Emma's jaws jumped as she ground her teeth. Without glancing up, she stalked into the kitchen, tossed the foam box onto the island between the three teenagers, and mutter, "Enjoy," before storming out the back door.

Ruby flinched at the thump of the sliding glass and moved to follow her friend. A soft hand on her arm stopped the noble act, and she glared down at a hobbling Amelia. "I've got her," the surgeon declared and followed The Savior at a stunted clip. That damn woman wanted to pull something again. That'd get her slapped by Eva for sure.

Amelia snagged a couple of the cookies being demolished by the growing hormone bombs surrounding the container like vultures. "Save one of those for Alex," she ordered, and Katy happily set a smaller one aside for the tot lurking about somewhere, no doubt.

The patio door closed much more softly than the previous time, and Amelia hobbled to the stairs, cursing her need to care for these damnable women. She turned to the side and stepped down with both feet before moving to the next stair. At least something had broken loose, she reminded herself. Between Emma's anger and Regina's terrible habit of being stubborn as a damn donkey in winter, she wondered if they'd ever breech their stalemate. Pride started more wars and ended more relationships than anything else in this world. When she reached the bench beneath Regina's apple tree, she gingerly lowered herself beside the sulking savior and placed a cookie on Emma's jean-clad thigh.

"Eat a damn cookie," she sassed and chomped into her own. "They're still warm."

Emma stared at the tree without acknowledging her order. "Did you know that not even a Honeycrisp Tree can survive for long on its own?"

"Uhh, why would I know that?" Amelia asked, cocking her head to the side and wrinkling her nose sardonically.

"Damn it, Amelia, I'm trying to tell you something here," Emma lashed out, swiping the bribe from her leg in a fit of anger. Amelia stopped mid-bite and slowly lowered the hand holding the cookie to her lap.

"Listening," she promised and busied her mouth with sucking bits of cookie from her molars instead of talking. Emma slouched into the bench and stared at the tree again. A few seconds later and without warning, Emma raised off the bench, wrapped a hand around her neck, and pulled Amelia into an impassioned kiss.

"Hey, whoa," Amelia whispered and pushed on Emma's shoulders until the woman leaned back enough to catch her gaze. "That potion has boiled, Emma."

"Oh come off it, Amelia. I know the only reason you haven't made some sort of move on me since then is because you know it'd be the end of any sort of respect any of them have for you." Emma leaned forward again. "I know you want this," she goaded the neurosurgeon.

"Emma, I'm with Caleb, and I'm really trying to take it seriously," Amelia switched tactics and smacked her hands on Emma's solid shoulders as she leaned forward again. The reverberation jolted her healing stomach, eliciting a hissing groan.

"That didn't stop you when I was with Regina and trying to take it seriously," Emma dethroned that great idea, too, and surged forward once more. Their mouths connected. Amelia turned her head.

"Emma, stop." She kissed her neck in response. "Emma, stop," she repeated more firmly, real fear bubbling inside of her. "Ruby!" She yelled, knowing the wolf would hear her. She clawed at Emma's shoulders.

"Come on, Amelia, I thought you liked it when The Savior broke the rules. Makes you feel dirty to corrupt the incorruptible, right?" Emma lost herself in it, remembered how wonderful it felt to say fuck all to the rules and settle into the comforting darkness of Regina's heart magic.

A hand slid along the inseam of her jeans, a thumbnail scratching the lump of hem at her crotch. Amelia angled her arm awkwardly and punched Emma's eye socket, not enough to harm her, but the message finally flashed in giant neon letters before The Savior's eyes. If Amelia felt threatened enough to smack her on the head, knowing how much damaged remained in there, she'd crossed a serious line.

She pulled back just in time to see Ruby jump the banister and sprint inhumanly towards them. The wolf grabbed Emma under the shoulders and hauled her over the back of the bench, using her superior strength to wrestle her to the ground with an arm pinned behind her back. Amelia watched for a moment, but her eyes drifted straight ahead after a moment of wriggling from a completely incapacitated Emma. Her friends were so screwed up.

"Amelia?" Ruby called over her shoulder, most of her focus on restraining Emma without actually harming her. No response. "Amelia, answer me, damn it. Are you okay?"

Amelia nodded, not realizing Ruby couldn't see her. When the sounds of struggle stopped, she sniffed and wiped her nose with the back of her thumb. "Let her up, Ruby," she ordered softly. Sounds of rustling grass followed, footsteps, but no physical altercation. Suddenly, Ruby appeared in front of her, kneeling, touching her knees. They'd never liked each other, but they always came to the rescue when necessary.

"I did this," Amelia confessed, head bowing under the weight of her guilt.

Ruby grabbed her shoulders, supporting her if she fell forward completely. "I have no idea what just happened, but I'm not stupid, blind, or deaf. Emma was forcing you."

Amelia shook her head. "It's not her fault, not really."

"Amelia, it's not yours either. Hey," she shook her shoulders firmly but not violently. "What is this? You spout the least bullshit of any of us. Why are you blaming yourself?"

"The Zambcurk Root potion, it… it does stuff to people," Amelia purported. "It's not like The Dark Curse where new identities are written or a complete memory wipe like some potions. It's different. It…" She dropped her face into her hands and breathed deeply, desperately searching for control of her emotions. Slowly, her fingers slid into her hair and her palms pressed into her temples. She held them there, looking as miserable as she obviously felt.

"It changes people. I made the damn potion, but I was never going to give it to Regina. Not to forget Emma, anyway. When you carve out memories like that, you take pieces of the personality with it. You take away the things the forgotten person taught them, the happiness they gave them. If Regina had taken it to forget Cora, for example, she probably would have undone a lot of the anger she still holds in her heart. If used correctly, it can be a powerful healing tool when the mind is too broken to heal itself. I've seen that potion take abused women or children from paranoid, asocial hysterics to relatively functioning and productive people. Like all other magic, the intention not the existence makes it good or evil.

"But she lost Regina. She lost her love, Ruby. The only thing that is keeping Emma from completely going off the deep end is the fact that their hearts are connected in a blood oath, but even that won't be enough if she completely gives up on Regina."

They shared a deep understanding and grief-filled look. A switch flipped inside Ruby. She understood this woman in that one moment of clarity. Amelia never meddled. She'd made the potion because Regina asked her to. She'd done a favor for a friend without judgment or commentary on her life or her decisions, just as she guided Emma into the darkness of magic. She'd never criticized her feelings of loneliness and isolation. She simply absorbed it as reality and allowed Regina to fall apart in the comfort that someone cared enough to do something, just as Emma fell into her arms when she'd been unable to cope with Regina's heart in her chest, all that anger and grief. As unorthodox and questionable her actions were to the rest of them, Amelia ventured to the dark places to help others save their souls without regard to her own reputation.

"I'm sorry, Amelia," Ruby apologized without really knowing what she apologized for. Ruby saw the confusion but supplied no answers. She squeezed Amelia's shoulders and then left the woman on the bench to sort out her own thoughts and went in search of Emma.

She waved off the confused looks of the teenagers, though she suspected Batch heard more than she revealed. Tink leaned against the wall in the foyer where Regina's magic blasted a hole the night they discovered The Evil Queen had returned, one foot propped against it, arms crossed. Ruby stopped in the middle of the foyer and just breathed in only the presence of her most-trusted employee… maybe even someone who had become her friend during those late night clean-ups after they'd flipped whipped cream at each other and laughed until their sides ached.

"You good, boss lady?" Tink asked more gruffly than one might have expected from a former fairy. The years of exile and solitude hardened her.

"I just want this to be over," she admitted, emotionally exhausted. While everyone knew that she would never have stopped fighting for Emma and Regina, she also felt other responsibilities breathing down her neck. Her children to start, the tenuous balance she'd found with Belle, the wolves still in a cave, the secret she shared with Katy about Ben's estate that they'd not yet addressed, the memories implanted in her brain during the brief moments inside Lauren's body.

Some of them comforted her, like Eva's loving gaze that revealed so much more than the seer ever seemed to feel except in the privacy of their bedroom. Some felt boring but important, like trying to fix dinner but burning it. The succubus apparently sucked at cooking. Others twisted her guts into knots, the ones in the old asylum – the trauma of having a body part cut from her while she remained awake and able to feel every single second of the agony without any type of painkillers in her system, the strength it took to hold Katy's gaze each time Ben saw fit to rape the girl in front of her, long hours of delirium from whatever medication Ben pumped into her system, days of crying out for Eva to save her. Ruby only ruminated and theorized, but she assumed she got the largest dose of those memories because they were freshly burned into her mind and incredibly powerful images associated with overwhelming emotions.

Ruby had grown closer with the quiet nurse during their meditation sessions, but she'd failed to see the pain Lauren wore so blatantly. Everyone missed it because no one really looked at her. That usually worked in Lauren's favor. She preferred to work in the shadows, taking no credit or spotlight for what she believed to be her life's mission. Healing, not hurting.

"Ruby?" Tink called suddenly directly before her, startling her from her thoughts.

"What?" Ruby snapped, embarrassed.

Tink cocked an eyebrow in a 'Really, bitch?' position and put her hands on her hips. "I asked if I could do anything to help," Tink repeated with far more attitude than the first time.

"Uhh, yeah, I was just getting ready to fix lunch before crisis struck. Think you can make something? And maybe air out the kitchen, get the cinnamon scent out of there as much as possible," Ruby added hopefully.

Tink grinned wryly. "Only for you."

"Great, thanks." Ruby turned to leave, stopped two steps away and then faced her friend again. "Actually, I need a bigger favor, not immediately but soon." Tink sighed dramatically, but Ruby only smiled at the familiar gesture. Tink enjoyed playing the drama queen even if she never actually behaved as one.

"I want you to take over the diner, as sort of a manager. Belle and I are set financially for a while, and I have too much on my plate right now to even think about…"

"Yes," Tink blurted before Ruby even finished her explanation. "Fucking Christ on a pogo stick, girl, I thought you'd never ask." She smiled a true, genuine smile, one that Ruby had only seen less than a handful of times.

"Really?" Tink nodded. "It would only be temporary until we get everything back on track, and then I'd like to start expanding with you as head of our catering service. I'm thinking about trying to pull outside business in, some Internet ads of the inn. Romantic getaways, birthday parties, hell I might even throw in one for bachelor parties if I can get hooked up again with those girls Belle and I found for Emma and Regina's wedding party."

"You mean, the ones that molested Granny and taught Belle how to give a proper lap dance?"

Ruby laughed. "Those be the ones."

"Awesome," Tink rasped, clearly excited for Ruby's myriad of ideas for business growth.

"In the meantime, do you want to start working on some ad campaigns and throwing together a catering menu and some prices and stuff? We can pretty much do anything as long as we have time to order the materials, but…"

"But we need a place to start," Tink finished the thought, and Ruby nodded.

"Exactly."

Tink surged forward and threw her arms around Ruby's neck in a rare display of physical affection and then stepped back awkwardly. "Thanks, Ruby. I won't let you down. You and Granny have done so much for me since Blue refused to grant me access into the sisterhood. I'm not sure I would have figured out how to…this world is very bizarre," she laughed instead of delving deeper into the emotional gratitude she'd attempted to express.

"You're welcome," Ruby returned warmly. She'd overlooked Tink so long because of her ability to set a wet block of ice covered in a steel coating on fire without touching it, but she really depended on the young woman in regards to her business. She'd earned that trust and respect. "You can do a trial run with the catering thing at mine and Belle's wedding. How's that sound?"

"Really? You're going to trust me not to set your huppah on fire?"

They shared a knowing smile, and Ruby punched her arm lightly before commencing the search for Emma. "Kids are hungry," she tossed over her shoulder and sauntered towards the living room.

She found it empty, so the search continued into the rest of the house. Finally, Ruby cracked the door to Annabel's nursery and glimpsed Emma sitting in the rocking chair with Annabel in the crook of one arm, the other thumb clasped tightly in the sleeping girl's tiny fist. Ruby slipped into the room and closed the door behind her softly.

Without taking her gaze from her daughter's sleeping features, Emma said, "It's easy to forget all the shit we've done when you hold her, isn't it?"

"Yeah," Ruby agreed and slipped her hands behind back as she leaned against the door, feet together in front of her to create a perfect point of her toes like the mom from Dexter's Laboratory. Ruby rolled her eyes at the thought, she so needed to watch adult shows beyond The Golden Girls.

"Is Amelia okay?" Emma asked, raising her eyes to the wolf's.

"She's hurting, Emma, and what just happened didn't help," Ruby answered honestly, wishing someone had the gall to tell it to her straight her entire life rather than sugarcoating everything. Emma nodded, returning her gaze to the infant in her arms. She'd be walking before long. They'd missed so much of the tiny girl's life already just fighting to stay alive and together.

"Wanna talk about it?" Ruby tossed out a lifeline to her friend but expected very little bites at the hook. "What caused you to go all Evil Savior out there?" Ruby added, blunt and direct. The people in her life needed to start talking because she had other shit to do.

"Regina's note," Emma answered sullenly. "I'm fighting like hell to get back to her. She gave up on us, not me." The unbearable pain filled Emma's face quickly, too quickly to stop or hide. "I'm just trying to move on and do what's best for my kids, for myself."

Ruby understood that better than most. "I think her note means that she's trying to fight, too. Regina isn't like us, Emma. She doesn't know how to woo or romance or say she's sorry. Hell, we don't even know how to say sorry half the time without beating the hell out of each other. Maybe she's ready to fight. Whatever Granny is doing seems to be working because she hasn't killed, maimed, or stolen anyone's heart yet." They shared a brief and painful smile at the tiny quip.

"Yeah, I guess," Emma agreed and resumed the tender staring at her daughter's face. Ruby suspected Emma felt closer to Regina while holding Annabel. They'd fought so hard for her defied the impossible. "You might be the literally worst person to ask, but… what should I do?"

Ruby scoffed. "Thanks pal, I think I'm doing a damn fine job at the moment."

Emma glared up at her, and Ruby sobered. Right, serious moment. She sighed and considered Emma's question properly. "I think you should give her a green light. Let her know it's okay to continue doing whatever it is she plans on doing. If you don't, she may never reach out again. What the hell happened between the two of you anyway?"

Emma chewed on the suggestion for a long moment, gaze distant and blank. Suddenly, she came to life. "She queened out on me, and I got mad. Like really mad, like Evil Savior mad, and I basically told her that I was going to erase her from our lives if she didn't get her head out of her ass. I may have gone overboard when I told her how easily Amelia could take her place in my bed."

"Jesus," Ruby breathed. That explained a bit.

"Will you call David and ask him to buy another bag of hazelnut truffles and take them to her?" Emma asked suddenly.

"Sure. Want to include a note?" It was a start, Ruby reminded herself. No matter how juvenile it seemed, Emma and Regina needed some form of communication right now.

"No, she'll know it's from me. She's addicted to those things, but she only keeps them in the bedroom where no one can see her eat them, especially the kids because she's always talking about eating right and stuff, but those things are her weakness," Emma explained, a nostalgic smile on her lips. Thankfully, Emma seemed to retain the memories of Regina after the amnesia incident. She remembered her as Young Emma, but nothing before.

"I… did not know that," Ruby said, slightly surprised but not overly so. With as many goodies as Regina baked, she knew that the older woman had some sort of sweet tooth weakness concealed behind all of that broccoli and asparagus. "Consider it done," she promised and left Emma to calm herself by the gentle presence of her daughter. It wasn't lost on Ruby that both Emma and Regina sought comfort with the child they'd made together. In a way, they reached out to each other indirectly.

They were so screwed up.


	31. Fight for Me

Enjoy, lovelies!

Songs: The Story of Beauty by Destiny's Child, Stay with Me by Madilyn Bailey (so much better than the original)

* * *

><p>"I think you should learn this song for Belle," Katy said from the shadows of the kitchen. Ruby jumped, not having realized that anyone else roamed the house at that hour.<p>

"What is it?" She snapped, covering the surprise with a question as she opened the fridge door. Silently, she berated her wolf for sleeping in and allowing her to be caught off guard.

"It's called Play it Again. Henry probably could have written the lyrics, but beyond that it's annoyingly catchy and something that Belle would probably love," Katy stated her opinion and extended Belle's Ipod, the only piece of technology they owned without Internet capabilities. Ruby had smashed her cell phone to smithereens and supplied her with it so that she'd not be without music but protected from the horrible abuse of ignorant people.

Ruby stuck a bud in her ear and turned down the volume before starting the song. She finally settled on making a sandwich from the left over chicken roast she and Belle prepared for dinner. As the song continued, she found herself smiling at the chicken she shredded. Katy called it right on the money. Easy lyrics, easy guitar chords, but catchy as hell. She pulled the bud from her ear and tossed the device back to the teen.

"Want a sandwich? You didn't eat much at dinner," Ruby asked, breezy. No pressure but concern. It came far more easily than she ever imagined kindness towards Katy would ever come again.

"Sure," she answered and went to the cupboard to grab two glasses. "Milk, tea, water, juice?"

"I'd like to have a bourbon and Dr. Pepper," Ruby muttered without actually meaning to, but the words passed between them too late to retract the very true statement. "Milk," she answered seriously and grabbed the bread.

Katy allowed the moment of yearning for Ruby's favorite vice to pass without judgment and poured two glasses of milk. Ruby had a lot on her plate, addiction reared its malicious form when stress rose. Ruby's resilience to it astonished her, especially when Regina kept her damn apple liquor and cider in the house.

"So, are you going to learn it?" Katy pushed a little when Ruby completely ignored the musical inquiry.

Ruby stiffened at the counter, the tension in her shoulders visible even in the dark with her puny mortal vision. "I can't play," Ruby confessed almost too quietly to hear.

"What?" Katy blurted. Ruby without her guitar felt like Regina without magic or Belle without her books.

"My fingers don't work right," Ruby explained with a shrug and flexed the digits in question. Jacob ripped out two fingernails on her left hand, leaving the very tips numb and lifeless and the rest of the skin to the first joint overly sensitive. Playing not only hurt, but she plucked the strings incorrectly. Silently, she set a plate in front of Katy and sat across the table from the staggered teen.

"Will they heal?"

Ruby shrugged and bit into her sandwich. She realized that the late night meal indicated the start of her stress eating but couldn't bring herself to care. She needed to put on a few pounds anyway, which was a task much easier in theory for a werewolf. She shoved the repetitive thoughts away and focused on the teen picking at the edge of her bread.

"Batch still out?" She asked for lack of anything better to say. She worried about the young wolf. She rarely spoke, even then only in one or two syllables when she positively needed to get a point across or ask for something. Beyond that, she helped with chores, entertained the children without being asked, made no fuss about Lauren and Eva checking her wounds, and happily befriended their severely damaged teenager. She noticed how expressive her face became around Katy, Eva and Lauren, too. They looked like a family when they sat together. Plus, the two chi eaters required no words to communicate with the almost mute. They looked at Batch the way she and Belle looked at Alex before adopting her. Ruby smiled to herself and refocused her attention to Katy's words.

"I swear that girl runs in her sleep like a wolf, whimpering and jerking. It's much less adorable in human form," Katy bitched. Ah, the reason for her isolation in the kitchen. Katy struggled with sleep anyway. If she'd been awoken, Ruby doubted very much her ability to return to the world of dreams.

"She misses her pack," Katy said suddenly. "She said 'cave' tonight when I asked why she couldn't get comfortable enough to sleep. I think she knows it's not safe for her to return until her wounds heal to prevent infection, but she's definitely getting homesick."

The weight of the world fell onto Ruby's already drooping shoulders, and the chicken turned to sludge on her tongue. She swallowed it anyway, stretching her throat painfully with the half-chewed bite. "I need to help them," she confessed to the girl more mature than half the adults she knew.

Katy shrugged. "Then help them and quite bitching about it." Ruby smiled a little at the direct rebuttal to her lament. Bits and pieces of that snappy personality emerged everyday away from the horrors she'd experienced, their Katy slowly returned, battered and scarred but whole.

"If only it were as simple as that. They live by a pack mentality. Jack's their alpha. I'm an interloper who integrated into a society they despise." Ruby dropped her sandwich to her plate and took a large drink of milk.

"I want you to take me to get birth control," Katy blurted and then squawked when milk sprayed over her face. She held her arms out, white droplets sliding onto her chest and the floor.

"What?" Ruby squeaked. She grabbed her heart, certain that the damn thing done tucked tail and bolted from the room and back to the safety of Belle's arms where the scary things faded to the background.

"Just putting things into perspective. You're far less freaked out by the wolves," Katy grumbled and stomped to the stove to grab the towel. She wet a corner and cleaned her face and chest and then the floor and table as best she could in the practically pitch black room beyond the faint moonlight outside and a safety light at the edge of the property. Because they needed safety lights in Storybrooke at the residence of the scariest bitches she'd ever met.

"Wait, wait, wait. Is this one of the things that you do for shock value to give us all conniptions or a serious request?" Ruby clarified, unsure which explanation she wanted more to fall from the girl's lips. Shock value meant Katy wasn't thinking about sex, which soothed her maternal instincts, but Katy requesting help meant that she trusted her enough to ask instead of figuring it out on her own.

Katy shrugged apathetically, and Ruby had her answer. "Do you want me to talk to Regina and Emma about getting an appointment with Dr. Montgomery?" Katy shook her head, closing down. "Katy, I can't read minds and I'm trying to help."

"Can't you or Belle get it?" Katy mumbled, crossing her arms over her chest protectively.

"I'm sure it could be arranged due to our unique situation in regards to guardianship of you, but legally they're your parents. The Council is leaning on Eva hard since…" _Since Ben._ "Recently."

"Yeah, well they're not here, are they?" She muttered darkly, and finally Ruby understood. It still confused her a bit about why Katy asked her and not Belle. Belle's reaction promised much less freak and a lot more solution, but there it was.

"Katy, is there someone you're thinking about getting involved with? Is that why this is so urgent?" Ruby asked as softly and tactfully as possible. The request slapped her around, keeping her just off-balance enough to prevent a strong foothold. Surely, after everything that'd happened over the past few months, sex remained on the bottom of the list of things Katy wanted to do.

"No, I just…" She crossed her arms and slouched into the chair in a huff. "I liked it, okay." Guilt. "I know some messed up stuff happened, but before that it was… I liked it." Shame. "So, I want to be ready next time. The last thing I need is a fucking baby."

Smart, Ruby agreed. The mother in her warred with the woman in her. Though young, she'd also found the joys of sex early in life, around Katy's age, but she also knew retrospectively she'd been far too young to be ready for it. When had she become this person? What happened to fun-loving, free-wheeling Ruby? Reflection had never been her strong suit.

"Okay," she agreed quietly, channeling her grandmother. "It's nothing to be ashamed of, Katy. Sexual urges are as natural as breathing, okay? Far be it for _me_, of all people, to tell you not to want it, but I just want to make sure that you're prepared emotionally for something that might be more detrimental than pleasurable right now. That's all," Ruby explained her position as best she could. She just wanted to protect her, to lock her away where no one could ever hurt her. Like Granny, she realized in a gut-twisting moment of clarity. Fuck, she was becoming her grandmother.

Katy's eyes rose to hers, still dark and tortured, and Ruby forced her panicky mind to focus on the girl. "You saw, didn't you?"

Ruby bit her lip and clicked her thumb nail on the plate. "I promised Lauren not to talk about any of the memories or feelings I saw in her head." She thought she'd cut off the stampede at the pass. The horror on Katy's face told her that she'd spooked it towards the cliff.

"You weren't talking about… that, were you?" Ruby asked haltingly. Katy shook her head very, very slowly, eyes and mouth wide open. Ruby winced and found her half-eaten sandwich very interesting.

Two Grannys forward, one giant Ruby fuck-up back.

"My phone," she clarified in a raspy voice, tight and scraping in her throat. "The colorful descriptions of what those perverts would like to do with my 'tight, athletic body' since I'm apparently a whore now."

Ruby's mouth formed a perfect 'O' but remained otherwise still and silent. Katy shifted uncomfortably, and Ruby thought for a moment she moved to leave the kitchen, either in embarrassment or anger or shame. When she raised her head to stop her, she found Katy still sitting there, staring, unable to speak, fear shining brightly in her eyes.

"I saw your phone, too. I broke it," she finally admitted the very much needed invasion of privacy.

"Good," Katy grunted, not affronted at all. Secretly, she hoped someone saved her from the mental and emotional torment but unable to stop torturing herself. She deserved much harsher punishments.

"We've all been there, Katy… people are stupid," Ruby offered the bit of immature but very truthful advice, but it only seemed to piss her off.

"Have you been raped?" The girl asked bluntly. "Because unless you know what that feels like… I mean, who is going to rape a wolf… and then to have people just… say shit, all the time. Yes, I chose to have sex with him, but I didn't chose to be abused."

Ruby closed her eyes slowly as Katy ranted, mouth parted slightly. She'd only ever really spoken to Regina and Belle about it, but the time of that small luxury ended because the common ground she'd found with Katy slowly slipped away in a pit of quicksand and she needed to freeze it again. "Yes," she forced out before she lost her nerve and opened her eyes even more slowly than she'd closed them.

Katy's rant stopped short, shock stealing her voice. For a moment, they merely stared across the table, neither really breathing. "What did you do?" She pushed gently. She asked how to cope, not for specific details, Ruby noted. Katy respected the difficulty in speaking of such events.

"Had an emotional breakdown," she answered honestly. "Other things were factors also, but this almost tore me and Belle apart. It took me almost a year before I told her what happened and that was only after Emma laid into me about how I'd been treating her."

"Can you… I mean, I know you can, obviously, but does it bother you still?"

"Depends on the situation and the person. Sometimes a fucktwat at the diner will say something inappropriate about my 'tight, athletic body' that takes me right back to that place. Not to my face, but wolf ears." She pointed to the side of her head. "The biggest obstacle I had to overcome with Belle was the feeling of losing control when I…" Her ears burned. "When I felt myself starting to… ya know," Ruby stuttered.

"I do," Katy blurted quickly, saving the poor flabbergasted wolf. They both shifted uncomfortably, letting the new intimacy between them settle. "It wasn't all bad with him." More guilt and shame.

"No?" Ruby asked, not sure what else to say but understanding the need to get things out when the urge struck because it may never strike again. Katy needed to know that the enjoyable experiences weren't something to be ashamed of, not for the simple fact that she'd enjoyed them.

Katy shook her head. "I really liked him before we ever had sex, and the first time, he… I don't know. He sort of… talked me through it. It wasn't gentle or what I imagine making love feels like, but I felt safe and I don't mind pain, so it was okay." At least the first time hadn't traumatized her. A fucking pathetic thing to cling to for comfort, Ruby seethed in her mind but held her tongue.

"You're mad at me," Katy concluded, smart enough to decipher the emotions on Ruby's overly expressive face. She always wore them so blatantly.

"Not at you," Ruby amended quickly, explaining rather than denying the emotion. Katy nodded and took a deep breath.

"The first time he forced me was right after Amelia's apartment blew up. I was so mad at all of you and I admit that I wanted to fuck with your heads, but I didn't sign up to kill any of you. I wanted out, but he beat me down so much that I didn't even know how to function without his orders. I still don't." She bowed her head and released a shuddering breath. Ruby's brow furrowed in compassion, but she sat quietly, waiting, letting Katy know she had the floor completely.

"I used to play with Jacob as a kid," she murmured, her thoughts fractured and nonlinear. Ruby remembered that overwhelming experience of speaking about trauma for the first few times. She'd jumped from one topic to the next without explanation or reason, just speaking as the thoughts flitted through her mind.

"When Peter sent him to live with his uncle," Ruby finally fit all the pieces together. Katy nodded. "I didn't know it was your village."

"He disappeared one day, not too long before Snow's army butchered and burned my village. I wasn't aware he'd survived until I started actively searching for other kids orphaned by the war to help with the youth center." Katy breathed heavily, completely detached from the horrors of her life as she described them.

"Did Jacob…?" Ruby failed to spit out the word 'rape,' but Katy understood.

"Once, the night we hung the flyers. That was the night I found out Ben was taking orders from someone else. I just didn't know it was Jacob. He…" Katy cleared her throat and tightened her arms around her ribs. "I couldn't see him. One minute Ben was behind me holding me down, and then he's in front of me and someone else is holding me down and..." Katy shrugged, her voice growing more and more distant with each word, dissociating for the sake of her sanity.

"I was drugged so it didn't really hurt that much, but it made me too afraid to say anything. Even when Ben forced me, he never brutalized me physically, ya know. I think a part of him really cared, but he was too fucked up or scared of Jacob to not follow orders. He refused this one time, and I paid the price by being defiled in every way possible." Ah. Ruby finally got what she'd poked at but felt unable to say. Anal could be painful, especial if done improperly. She only imagined how excruciating it must have been without preparation and consideration. Not that she'd felt guilty about killing Jacob before, but that moment actually made her wish he'd suffered more.

"Lauren begged me to let her go," she said suddenly, monotone and dead, jumping subjects again. Probably the way she felt inside, dead and jumbled. "I gave her a syringe of morphine if things got too much for her, more than enough to kill her, but Ben caught me. It's where I got the idea to… to kill myself." She fell silent, but finally life returned to her in the form of a small sniffle and a frustrated swipe at her face.

"A part of me still wishes that it'd worked. A few more minutes, and it would have been over." Regina almost lost the chance to save her. Technically, she had died, but Amelia and Eva saved her life. "Do you think they'd have saved me if they knew I was the reason they almost died, the reason Emma forgot all of us and Belle left and Lauren got abducted?"

"I do," Ruby answered honestly. "Amelia is pretty nonjudgmental when the person isn't me." They both smiled faintly at their continuous rivalry. "And Eva is more noble than vengeful. They'd have had their own reasons beyond loving you to do it, but I think they would have."

Katy nodded absently, taking the words at face value. "Every day after my morning drills, I stand in front of the shower, just staring at the water coming down, steam rising up to meet it. And every day, I ask myself the same question. What's the point? I'm never going to feel clean again, so what's the freaking point. But every day, I step into the water and let it burn my skin until I go numb because somehow not trying feels worse than fighting this war of attrition with myself."

Ruby swallowed thickly, afraid to breathe too heavily lest her barely controlled tears break lose and try to wash the girl clean with their salt. "Does anything help?"

Katy chewed on the question for a long, tense moment, gnawing the inside of her jaw. "Alex," she whispered.

Ruby smiled, and tears dropped onto her cheekbones. She left them to roll down her face untouched. "Does Batch or Austin help?"

"I think they could, but not yet," she answered honestly. She raised her face again, unashamed of her own tears when she saw Ruby's. "What are you going to do about the wolves?" She asked out of the blue, completely turning the flow of conversation on its head.

"A fine question," a grumpy, accented voice complimented behind them, and they both sighed in relief for the distraction before things became too uncomfortable. Katy just spilled her guts, and Ruby suspected it more to do with exhaustion and stress than actually feeling ready to discuss everything openly.

"Why is it being asked at 4 in the morning?" Belle demanded, clearly irritated and ignorant of the previous line of conversation if her snippy tone indicated anything.

"Couldn't sleep," Ruby answered, turning towards her lover. "Why are you up?"

"Had to puke," she slapped back and banged the kettle in the sink.

"Can I do anything to help?" Ruby approached cautiously, not quite sure what the protocol for late night vomiting called for. Belle wasn't a sick child. She carried two wolf pups in her belly.

"Just shut up and stay away from me," Belle scratched, and Ruby froze. Katy covered her mouth, finding far more humor in the command than she should have, probably distracting herself from everything she'd just revealed. Belle slammed the kettle on the stove, lit the burner, and then spread both arms wide to support her weight on the island. She looked exhausted.

"I'm sorry, Ruby," she apologized without actually sounding too apologetic. "I feel like my insides are being put through a blender and extracted from my throat with a vacuum attachment. I just want a cup of tea and silence from your foolywang."

She and Katy locked eyes at the odd word, both trying to frantically cover their giggles. "Do you want us to go to the living room?" She dared to query. Belle nodded and dropped her head between her shoulders.

The other two wasted no time grabbing their forgotten sandwiches and scrambling from the kitchen. Thirty seconds after they set their plates on the coffee table and settled into the couch, Belle appeared at the door. She hesitated for only a moment before bursting into the tears and staggering towards Ruby. The wolf opened her arms and pulled Belle onto the couch, butt on one side of her lap and feet on the other. She burrowed into Ruby's chest and cried softly. Ruby wrapped her up in a hug without really understanding her sudden emotional episode.

"Baby, what's wrong?" She whispered softly into Belle's hair. Katy met her eyes over Belle's head and shrugged, as freaked out and worried as Ruby.

"We…" Belle hiccupped. "We're… there…" She cried harder for a few second and then wailed, "We're out of peppermint tea."

Ruby bit the inside of her jaw hard enough to taste the iron of blood, but she refrained from laughing out loud at her exhausted, hormonal fiancée. "Do you…" She stopped to clear her throat to cover a giggle. "We have ginger, right? That helps with the nausea."

Belle pulled back and stared up at her like she'd just ask her to piss in a cup and drink it. In a huff, she pushed Ruby away and stomped to her feet. "You have no sympathy for what I'm going through. These are your fucking wolves," she yelled harshly, stamping out of the living room.

Ruby looked to Katy who flailed her arms wildly, gesturing for Ruby to follow the distraught former princess. She caught her at the door between the foyer and living room and grabbed her arm, spinning her carefully into another embrace. "I'm sorry, Baby. We have some at the diner. Do you want me to drive over there and get it?"

"You don't have to," Belle answered coyly.

An indignant squeak bubbled in Ruby's throat, and she shoved it down. With a deep breath, she managed, "I want to," in a steady, compassionate voice.

Belle threw her arms around Ruby's neck and kissed her hard. "You're the best," she praised against Ruby's lips and then practically sashayed back to the kitchen, like the past few minutes hadn't happened.

Ruby stood there, completely dumbfounded. Katy slapped her between the shoulders. "Come on, I'll drive. Wouldn't want you to wreck and make that foolywang worse, although it is one of your more attractive qualities."

Ruby glared at the girl, but she'd already descended the foyer steps and started slipping into her running shoes left there. "What the hell does that word mean anyway?" Ruby asked the teen and followed her to the door, thankful that the moderately warm night required no more clothes than the boy shorts and tank top she wore.

"I have no idea, but it's really fun to say," Katy offered as an answer.

Ruby rolled her eyes and stuck her bare feet into a pair of flip flops Belle used to check the mail because she refused to walk that far barefoot on a pristine path of smooth stone. The sole barely reached to the arch of her foot, but she snagged her keys and dutifully braved the early morning dew barely dressed for the sake of a happy pregnant fiancée.

Tossing the full ring to Katy, Ruby rounded the front of the car to the passenger side. "Seriously?" Katy exclaimed, not having expected Ruby to go along with it.

"You know how to drive, have your license and are with an adult. What's the problem?" Ruby snapped, but no ire or real irritation filled her voice.

Katy took no longer to question the decision and slid behind the wheel of Emma's Camry. The drive took the usual five minutes, and Katy followed every single traffic rule with attentive caution. Ruby suspected more so to impress her than to display her good driving habits. Captain taught that girl to drive. Ruby knew that she'd equipped her to handle any situation from whiteout snow conditions to magical fire.

When they arrived, Ruby keyed into the front door of the diner without reservation. She'd missed it, the thick scent of grease and the subtler scents of her healthier items. Katy followed, and they both stopped abruptly when they found Regina sitting at the counter in the dark nursing a cup of coffee and staring at an opened bag of hazelnut flavored truffles – little balls of plastic and foil neatly piled in front of the bag. Ruby knew instantly that her thoughts revolved around her wife, probably as puzzling and troubling as her own about the wolf situation.

"Katyline," she greeted her daughter first. "Ruby, what are you doing here?" She slid from the stool, looking more than a little spooked by their presence.

"We just came to get some peppermint tea for Belle," Ruby explained quickly, hoping to avoid an altercation, even just a verbal one. "I'm sorry we interrupted you, didn't think anyone would be up. We'll be gone in 30 seconds. It's just right there." She pointed to the tea display behind the counter beside the coffee machine."

"Oh," came the simple answer. Regina rounded the far end of the bar and reached beneath the counter and retrieved an unopened box of the desired flavor. She took two steps towards them, stopped, smacked her palm absently on the end of the box.

"How are you, Katyline?" She asked, hesitant and unsure.

"I'm…" Katy glanced at Ruby and then back to Regina and then back to Ruby, unsure how to proceed or answer the simple question. "I'm worried about you," she chose honesty above platitudes.

"Our situation is unprecedented," Regina responded sadly. As quickly as she'd fallen into the dark mood, she snapped out of it and forced a smile towards her daughter. "Would you sit with me a while?"

Ruby started. Katy sputtered. Regina's shoulders drooped in disappointment.

"Tell you what, let me run this back to the house, and I'll be right back to pick you up if you want to stay," Ruby gave the girl and Regina the best compromise available, one that Emma undoubtedly would flip shit over when she found out.

"Sounds good," she spoke to Ruby, but her eyes stayed on Regina.

Ruby stepped forward and reached across the counter when Regina extended the tea. She took the box, careful not to touch or startle the woman in any way. "You have ten minutes, Regina. I really can't give you more than that."

"Thank you, Wolf Pup," Regina whispered graciously. The pet name caught Ruby around the heart and squeezed it tight.

"Are you okay?" She asked her friend who had literally lost her mind.

Regina shrugged one shoulder, looking far younger than her age, but her eyes glazed in a hauntingly beautiful way in the dim light just starting to brighten with the promise of the sun. "Granny is very attentive and patient," she answered, indirectly telling Ruby that, for the situation, she received the emotional support she needed and firm but kind guiding hand. Probably the best answer the wolf hoped to get out of her.

"I'm glad," Ruby said sincerely and then glanced over her shoulder. "Don't screw this up or it will never happen again, okay?" Regina's eyes went wide, and she nodded slowly, unable to articulate a proper response. Ruby sighed heavily, already thinking of all the things that could go wrong in ten minutes. "Okay."

She bolted out the door, and Regina knew she'd been granted less than ten minutes. Ruby's wolf reflexes and excellent night vision allowed her to drive much faster than a human. "Would you like some coffee?" She asked, keeping things simple, content to be in the presence of her eldest if only for a few minutes.

"Okay," Katy answered and sat on the stool beside the one where Regina had been perched upon their arrival. Regina poured the liquid caffeine and set it in front of her and then leaned against the server's counter, maintaining a respectful and safe distance from the girl.

"Would you like a chocolate?" She pointed towards the gold bag with one elegant finger, palm towards the ceiling. Katy reached into the bag and snagged one of the balls of deliciousness. She fiddled with the plastic and foil tabs on either side but didn't open it.

"Emma is really messed up, Regina," she blurted, unafraid to push the woman obviously fraught for her attention. Regina lowered her eyes, guilty and wordless. "She needs you," Katy tried again.

"Emma made it perfectly clear that my presence in her life is neither needed nor wanted," Regina disputed the claim, biting back the hurt, fighting to remain calm for the sake of her daughter.

"Bullshit," Katy grunted. "You're just scared that that might actually be true, so you're sitting here in the dark hiding because you can't cope with the thought of being abandoned regardless of what that is doing to the people you claim you love, to your kids," Katy finished weakly, revealing the pain behind her anger.

"Katyline, I'm so very sorry that I've caused you pain, but I cannot risk your safety. You understand that, surely," Regina threw out another excuse, and Katy rolled her eyes, dropping the candy to the counter.

"You don't get it, Regina. You're not going to get any better unless you try. We've all been dangerous to be around at one point or another. Emma's messed up magic. Belle's PTSD flashes. Ruby's wolf. I'm still not sure they completely feel safe sleeping in the same house as me." She scrubbed hands over her face in a very Emma gesture and growled at herself. "The point is, we make plans for those possibilities. Even if you're only allowed in the house while Belle is there because of her wolf magic stuff, it's a better plan than hiding here for the rest of your life."

Katy rolled her eyes when headlights pulled up in front of the diner and slid off the stool. She'd had enough of Regina for the moment anyway. "You really have no clue, do you?"

Regina raised her head, eyes shimmering with tears. "What?" She asked wetly, voice thick with the emotion constricting her throat.

"We don't care if you come as this Regina or Evil Regina as long as you're not trying to kill us. We just want you to come home because we love both parts of you. I'm not sure you could understand any of us without your dark side. We're all fucked up, we've all done horrible shit." Katy sniffed but held her head high.

"We can't love you if you won't let us, and I do, Regina. I know I can't say it very well, and I'm horrible at showing it, but…" She exhaled sharply and crossed her arms as she bowed her head protectively.

"I love you, Mom," she said quietly and then bolted for the door before Regina even thought to respond. The title kicked the breath from her chest, and she grabbed the skin above her wildly pounding heart as if the gesture might have stilled the temperamental organ.

"From the mouths of babes," Granny murmured at the edge of the hallway that led to her apartment. She wore slippers and a housecoat over her nightgown. Gray hair spilled over her shoulders, and her face carried a softness without the strict glasses conspicuously absent from the bridge of her nose. She crossed behind the counter and poured herself a steaming cup of coffee.

"I don't know what to do, Granny," Regina pleaded with the woman to help her.

Granny raised the scalding coffee to her lips and took a healthy swig as old people seemed to have the miraculous ability to do without burning their mouths, staring at her over the cup the entire time. She topped off her mug. "I think you do," she offered as the only sliver of guidance she had to offer at such an early hour and disappeared into the hallway again.

Regina stared at the slowly disappearing darkness long after Granny left her sight. A part of her expected Granny to pop around the corner and frighten her, but she never returned and Regina never moved. Even as the sun rose and tossed burnt amber streams through the closed blinds, she stared at that spot, acutely aware of her solitude. It's what she'd wanted, right? No one around to hurt her, to be hurt by her.

To love her and then leave her aching in their absence.

_Maybe you need to fight for me for a change._ The last words Emma spoke to her bounced around her head, taunting and hollow as she sank to the floor behind the counter and pulled her knees to her chest. She buried her face in them and cried quietly in the safety of her solitude. It felt secure and familiar as it always had, but somewhere between casting the curse and adopting Henry, being alone failed to bring any sort of solace or comfort.

_Maybe you need to fight for me._


	32. A Start

Thank you for the reviews, Lovelies. I spent a little extra time with this chapter, so I missed my usual posting time.

Thank you for the reviews and new follows! Enjoy!

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><p>Song: Roger Rabbit by Sleeping with Sirens (again, thank you to the reviewer who suggested this song to me during The Color Red. I love it. It's so perfect for them. If anyone else has any song suggestion, hit me with them. I love finding new music and have no aversion to any genre.)<p>

"Alexandra Lucas, you need clothes!" Belle scolded the tiny child currently streaking through the house in only her big girl pull-up, tangled hair flying behind her. Belle felt her patience slipping. She'd turned her back for two minutes – two minutes! – while she got her nausea under control, and in those two minutes, her escape artist managed to find a way over the baby gate at her room door, climbed down the stairs (which terrified Belle) and blitzed through the foyer practically buck nekkid.

After her late night puking and Ruby's brilliant idea to leave Katy alone with Regina at the diner, Belle desired nothing but a bath, a bed, and no children for 24 hours. Alex howled in response to her mother's snappy command and headed towards the living room. "I'm a wolf!" She declared and howled again.

Ruby helpfully stepped from the kitchen and scooped the girl up, barely keeping up with the tiny body baying at the moon and squirming to get free from her wolf grasp and reflexes. Emma laughed in the background but stayed put with her own baby girl happily sucking a fruit towel to alleviate her swollen gums. Before long, she'd be running along behind Alex. The doorbell sounded as Belle stalked across the foyer. She scowled at her child and her annoyingly amused lover and tossed the shorts and t-shirt at Ruby's face, easily caught with her reflexes now that Alex had settled a bit.

Belle huffed, disappointed, and happily answered the door in lieu of coping with the incredibly noisy house. Katy, Batch, Henry, Emma, and Ruby all carried on in the kitchen while she'd been banished upstairs because of Henry's sensitivity to her presence. The solitude suited her for a little while, but the longer she wanted to come downstairs to be with her family, the more it hurt. She shoved the pang aside and ripped the door open.

"What? It's seven o'clock," Belle snapped before checking to see who bothered them at such an ungodly hour. She used to love mornings. The door opened fully and revealed the last person she expected to see.

"Regina," Belle blurted, a lot of her previous irritation slipping away to make room for shock.

Regina's eyes widened dramatically at the greeting, her body coiled and taut with tension. She compacted her muscles just a tiny bit more at the ire in Belle's angry blue eyes but remained otherwise still and silent, waiting to see the reaction before she acted.

"Hello, Belle," Regina returned, reserved. She tapped her fingers on the container in her hands, indecisive and anxious. Plastic wrapped in thick layers covered it. "I made bear claws for everyone. I hope the cinnamon doesn't reach you through the plastic. Perhaps if we ate them on the patio, you may be spared?"

Belle snorted. "Not sure cinnamon would make much of a difference in how I feel this morning." Her stomach hated her, hated her with a seething, dripping, venomous passion. Wait, "We?" She finally processed Regina's words. Belle's ears picked up the approach of another. Slightly heavier than Ruby, shorter gait. Emma. Regina's eyes raised over her head, confirming what she already knew.

"What do you want, Regina?" Emma snapped from the top of the foyer stairs.

"I'd like to have breakfast with my children," Regina answered, firm enough to let everyone know she intended to push if necessary but respectful and apologetic enough to be sincere. "With you," she added, the façade of strength slipping in her frantic need.

Emma scowled and crossed her arms. Belle saw the rejection coming.

"Emma," Belle caught her attention. "For your kids," she pleaded, hoping she'd not just overstepped a boundary. Though, what exactly constituted a boundary in their family? They practically co-parented the four, and none of them wanted it any other way.

Emma softened slightly, like she'd just remembered how deeply the connection in their hearts touched her. Hardened again when she remembered Regina's unforgivable betrayal. The kids needed this, especially Henry. "Whatever, but if you Queen out on them once, I'll use one of Amelia's potions to keep you out of this house for good. Got it?" The Savior threatened her wife, eyes stormy with the grief she refused to acknowledge.

"I understand and accept your conditions," Regina answered diplomatically.

Belle stepped aside and waved a hand for Regina to enter ahead of her and then leaned heavily on the door to watch Regina climb the stairs with an eerie fluidity. A part of her wanted to slide to the floor and sit there with her knees pulled to her chest until her stomach stopped hurting. Kicking the toe of her chuck against the hardwood, Belle followed reluctantly. She should have known that day destined to be bizarre when she longed to wear the flat shoes she'd bought during her hiatus, better for walking long miles and aching backs caused by retching over a toilet for several hours.

Sticking her thumbs into the first loops of the jeans that felt too tight to truly be comfortable anymore, Belle followed to see if the mansion actually exploded this time. The kitchen fell blissfully silent upon Regina's entrance, and Belle retreated to Ruby's side at the stove to watch the scene unfold.

"Mom!" Henry exclaimed and rushed to hug her. No matter how angry he may have felt, he loved his mothers more than anything. Regina patiently accepted the hug and brushed fingers through his freshly trimmed hair.

"You've needed a cut for some time," she commented, sticking to safer subjects.

"Aunt Ruby took me with her yesterday when she got her streak put back in," he explained, tossing a toothy grin in Ruby's direction. "You like it?"

"Very handsome," Regina praised and extended the box of sweets. "Please open those on the patio. There's cinnamon," she cautioned and relinquished the box to his excited hands… at least up to the moment she mentioned the courtesy towards Belle.

"Why do I care if she pukes all over the place?" He snapped, glaring at Belle at the stove. Everyone suspected that she received the brunt of his anger because she was the most convenient target. In a way, he felt secure enough in their relationship to push her away without fear of further abandonment, but his mothers' feud terrified him, so he lashed out at the safer target. Belle understood enough about psychology to allow the verbal lashings from the young teen.

"Henry, come on, man," Katy called from the island, giving the adults of her life a break. "Let's not fuck this up," she scolded the boy, and he stomped onto the back porch without another word.

"What's in the box?" Ruby asked, curious and a bit miffed that appetites were being spoiled but too happy to see her best friend to care that much. Mostly, she just distracted Regina from Henry's anger.

"Granny and I made bear claws this morning," she answered, but her eyes stayed focused on the frizzy-haired warrior studying her from the other end of the island. It wasn't lost on any of them that she'd made Emma's favorite breakfast sweet, but they remained silent, watching the silent interaction between Regina and her eldest. "Hello, Katyline."

"Regina," Katy snipped, obviously still pissed from their chat that morning but unafraid to point it in the right direction like Henry.

Everyone tensed when Regina crossed the kitchen with sure and pointed steps. Emma almost stepped between them, but Katy fell into Regina's soft embrace as the hurt beneath the anger surfaced. She cupped the back of the girl's head softly, allowing herself to feel. It terrified her. "I love you, too," she whispered and then pulled back abruptly.

"I need a moment," she explained, her eyes already darkening as the threatening presence of her family pulled that protector buried deeply within her psyche. Katy nodded, and she whirled gracefully and bolted from the kitchen with long strides. Emma glanced around at the expectant faces and then grumbled under her breath as she followed at a more subdued pace. Between Belle and Ruby going behind her back and allowing Regina visitations, the damn tug in her heart, Regina's obviously fractured mind, and the fact that she somehow found the intestinal fortitude to show up at the mansion in broad daylight… using the front door… Emma realized that the ball bounced into her court. She either allowed Regina the chance to fight or shut her down and kicked her out.

Unenthusiastically, she chased Regina across the foyer and into the living room. She prepared herself for The Queen. She prepared to yell for Ruby and Belle to help her throw out the dangerous creature threatening her children. What she'd not prepared for stood before her with arms crossed over her stomach, head bowed, eyes closed. "Don't change," Regina murmured quietly. "Don't change. Don't change."

"Regina," Emma said without thinking, and the other woman's head jerked, probably causing a kink in her neck with the force. The wild eyes only lessened the anger more in The Savior's heart.

"I can do this, just give me a moment," Regina pleaded, believing the same things Emma had prepared for an inevitability.

"Do you remember what the other half of you does when you switch?" Emma asked curiously, catching them both off-guard. Even if she never trusted her again, she needed to understand the other woman for the sake of their children. They needed Regina, and it wasn't fair to use them as a bargaining chip because she despised Regina in that moment.

"The images become clearer each time," Regina answered honestly. She'd not remembered anything at first, but as the two distinct parts of her personality became more defined, the more she remembered of each.

"Does it hurt?"

Regina studied the sincerity of the query in her lover's eyes. She saw curiosity but nothing condescending or angry. "If I fight, it often causes severe head pain."

Emma nodded and crossed her own arms, not sure how she was meant to feel in that moment. "I'm glad you're here," she mumbled, not able to look at the other woman. "As pissed as I am at you and as violated as I feel in regards to the memory potion, our heart connection doesn't… I don't know… palpitate, maybe?" Emma snorted at the disarticulation and raised her eyes to find Regina grinning. "The kids want you here," she finished because nothing else felt right.

"I'm trying to," Regina blurted when the silence stretched uncomfortably. She bowed her head, coiling tighter. Her muscles vibrated with the physical manifestation of holding herself together.

"To what?" Emma clarified.

"To fight for you, Emma, but I need to know that I'm not fighting in vain. I know you're angry, justifiably." Regina released a shuttering breath and turned her back to meander further into the living room, needing to move, to distract herself. Emma waited impatiently. She'd never been patient.

"If I try, will you be receptive?" Regina asked over her shoulder, afraid to find rejection in Emma's eyes instead of compassion. In her life, people took. They'd taken everything from her, and Emma threatened to rip everything away from her. If that remained the inevitable outcome, she and the children would all have benefitted from her continued absence.

"You're in the house, aren't you?" Emma clipped sardonically, but Regina heard the deeper undertone of fear and yearning. Emma hadn't meant those horrible things she'd said, just as Regina (Evil Regina) hadn't meant anything she'd said. They clawed at each other in self-preservation, not hatred. Emma feared abandonment, and Regina abused that fear in the worst way, far worse than giving her the potion. She'd tried to leave this world to an unknown realm with no guarantee they'd have ever been reunited. Regina closed her eyes slowly, realizing just how deeply her mistakes cut Emma.

"It's going to take me a long time to forgive you for fucking with my head," Emma added a moment later, real anger intoned in the biting words. She used anger to cover the deeper emotions she'd allowed Regina to read, loathing herself for the moment of vulnerability.

"It took me two lifetimes to find you, Emma. Contrary to my demanding personality, I'm a patient woman." Regina turned slowly as she spoke and faced the blonde woman again, surprised to find red growing around the rims of her eyes. Now that she'd gain a modicum of control as her lighter half, she finally saw the clarity of her mistakes. As long as she remained in control of her actions, not her dark side, she intended to spend the rest of her life repairing the damage in her wife's heart. "Emma?"

"Just…" Emma held up a hand, telling her to stay put. "You can't just change me because you didn't like what you saw."

"I wasn't… Emma, can't you see what I tried to do?" Regina pleaded, taking a step forward, arms uncrossing to welcome Emma into her heart again.

"Stop!" Emma yelled. Regina recoiled, the life that sparked in her eyes flickering. Emma's anger died with it. "Stop," she repeated more softly. "I'm not ready to hear your explanation yet. I need time to digest this now that I'm not slowly dying of soul poisoning, okay."

"Of course," Regina granted, more hurt than angry.

"Regardless of how I feel, I had a really long talk with Henry last night and Ruby this morning. We need a game plan because our kids are getting battered by our stupid mistakes, and that's not fair to them." Emma promised to put them first, to put her feud with Regina aside for his sake. The kid asked so little of them that acquiescing came far easier than Emma liked. Her kid hurt. They caused it. They were required to fix it.

"Perhaps breakfast is the place to start," Regina suggested hopefully.

Emma nodded. "Yeah." She turned from her wife and searched for a happy face, something beyond this endless grief.

She retreated to the moderate safety and comfort that Belle and Ruby offered, hoping her friends protected her shattered nerves for a little while longer. Regina followed. Belle and Ruby looked up at them expectantly and detangled from the intimate moment they'd fallen into in the absence of kids and other adults. Ruby straightened her shirt and wiped at her mouth.

Emma rolled her eyes. "How can you kiss her when she's slobbering worse than Annabel?"

"Think carefully upon your answer, Wolf," Belle threatened, but no one quite deciphered if she intended to follow-thru or joked.

Ruby cleared her throat. "Because she is beautiful, brilliant, sexy as hell, and I love her," she opted for a very safe answer, but the intonation told the other three that she'd already plucked a sarcastic jab from her mind and chose not to utilize it. Belle nodded, satisfied despite the obvious desire to say something else.

"So?" Ruby asked, gesturing between the two of them.

Regina stepped beside Emma but kept a healthy gorge between them. "I believe we have reached a compromise of sorts, though the details remain undiscussed," she answered regally.

"Breakfast is a good start," Emma repeated the words, and Regina's heart lifted slightly. "Maybe every morning?" Emma bit her jaw and tossed an askance look towards Regina for confirmation. "With Belle's puking keeping her up all night, we really could use an extra set of hands. It almost takes two of us to keep up with Alex," she added, keeping the arrangement about the kids.

"I'd like that," she agreed easily.

"Great," Ruby exclaimed, genuinely happy in spite of what she needed to tell her friends. "When are we going to sit down and talk about what's going on with your kids?"

"Has something happened?" Regina asked, more comfortable with that subject than anything between her and Emma.

"Something's been happening," Ruby responded, slightly angry at all of them for not catching it sooner. "Plus, Belle and I are done being in the middle of your custody issues. You know that we're here for both of you all the way, but not like this. We need to know exactly what you expect us to do because Katy and Henry need both of you right now, and we don't feel right denying either of you the chance to see them."

Regina and Emma shifted uncomfortably, glanced at each other, looked away. Belle rolled her eyes. She'd been so very wrong in doubting them. The need to be closer practically radiated from them in a blinding ray. The darker side of Emma that emerged in the incident with Amelia the previous afternoon faded as their hearts sought reconnection. Regina's Light Magic side obviously loved her, the yearning and desire evident in those apologetic caramel eyes.

"Okay, enough," Belle took charge as she'd been doing recently. "Regina, you're not stable. That's not a secret nor is it something to be ashamed of. I moved to the library when I thought I might hurt someone. Ruby wore her cape until she learned control. We all possess lethal powers that can get out of control given the proper circumstances. Being at Granny's is the right thing to do." Belle took a moment to make sure that everyone listened intently. They had.

"That said, perhaps supervised visits with the children would be prudent until you obtain better control of your halves," she suggested. After thirty seconds of watching the other three navel gaze, she huffed in frustration. "Is this agreeable? Emma?" She deferred to the one most likely to object first.

"As long as it's you or me supervising," Emma hesitantly agreed. "Or maybe Lauren," she added quickly. "No one else is strong enough to stop you if you get violent," she addressed Regina directly. Progress. "Sorry, Rubes," she spit with a little shrug.

"No objections from me. I don't have any magic, and I can only take so many fireballs to the chest without dying," Ruby relinquished her babysitting rights. It bothered her that as powerful as her wolf had become against Regina she'd have been useless. It was the right thing to do.

Regina nodded the green light to proceed. "Has Eva made any progress on how to reconnect my identities?" No one knew the answer. "What of Amelia's work to reverse the memory potion?" Everyone shifted uncomfortably. Emma's face fell. Regina's eyes darkened.

"Regina, calm down," Belle jumped into the fray. "There was an incident, yes, nothing of note and no injuries to speak of."

"What happened?" Regina demanded, glaring at her wife.

"I had a moment, okay. No worse than your little stunt with Ruby at the Rabbit Hole or in the cave. Just let it go. It was stupid, and I just wanted to hurt you. I came onto her, got shot down, and then tackled to the ground, literally. Can we move on now?"

Regina's nostrils flared, mouth twitching in a hateful snarl. "You belong to me," she declared and grabbed a fistful of Emma's shirt, jerking The Savior into her bodily.

"I don't belong to anybody," Emma declared right back. Her voice remained deep and steady, challenging but not goading. The staring match lingered. "Let me go," Emma said when the heat simmered, slowly dying.

Regina unfurled her fist and smiled prettily at The Savior. "As you wish." Her voice pitched condescendingly, and a smirk tugged at one corner of her mouth.

"Regina, may I ask you a question?" Belle interjected before the tension spiked again. Regina turned her head slightly, eyes on the librarian, but remained firmly planted in Emma's personal space – both too proud to move first.

"When you're this part of Regina, do you experience love or empathy?" Belle asked, unsure she wanted the answer.

Regina's brow furrowed slowly, and relief washed over Belle that she took the question seriously. With painstaking caution, Regina lifted her eyes with excruciatingly paced control and shook her head. "No. I want to possess the things I'm supposed to love."

"And your magic changes from Light to Dark each time?" Regina nodded.

"What's going on in that big brain, Belle?" Emma demanded.

"I refuse to believe that Regina is the first sorceress of heart magic to contend with both sources," Belle explained, her words tripping and bumping in her excitement.

"Let me guess, you're going to the library." Ruby smiled brightly, loving the sight of Belle excited for research.

"No, you and I are going to go talk to Rumpelstiltskin while Emma and Regina get reacquainted and eat their cinnamon-infused monstrosities. Please let Alex know we'll return soon," Belle instructed and tried to pull a reluctant Ruby from the room.

"Baby, I'm all for finding a solution, but him?" Ruby disentangled her wrist from Belle's tight grip and took both of her hands, listening but requiring more information. Asking him for help kicked them all in the gut until it ached like Belle's. Ruby suspected Belle's perky attitude towards it showed a braver front than she felt.

"Beth and I might spend days or weeks searching for leads in my books, and as enjoyable as that'd be, I'd much prefer to cut directly to a source of information. He's lived centuries as The Dark One. If anyone possibly knew of a solution without scouring my books, he does," Belle explained her position, an edge in her voice that indicated she'd already made up her mind whether they liked it or not. She needed Regina, too, and the thought of leaving her friend like this for the rest of her life scored her heart.

"Sweetheart, you hold his dagger. It's silly not to take advantage of his wealth of knowledge. I've never known him to forget a sorceress of note, and one with such abilities would certainly have captured his attention," Belle added more softly, tapping into her lover's anxiety. "I'll be fine. He doesn't control me anymore."

With a sigh and a nod, Ruby gave in, "Okay." They left without further discussion, and Regina listened for the whoosh of air pressure as the front door closed behind them.

"She seems much more herself since her return," Regina commented absently, still staring towards the foyer. The softness returned to her features during Belle's exit, and Emma reminded herself that this Regina's heart remained tender and vulnerable. This Regina hadn't hurt her, fucked with her mind. Evil Regina gave her the potion.

"She is," Emma agreed. "She fucked up a lot of people's faith in her when she took off like that, but she obviously knew what she needed wasn't in Storybrooke." If she were honest with herself, which she wasn't able to be in that moment, she envied Belle's ability to run away from her demons. Sure, Belle and Ruby would have taken care of her kids, but she would have broken them too badly to ever reunite properly again. She had no choice but to stand still and fight for them while they could be saved.

"Henry," Regina easily deciphered the meaning. Emma hummed an affirmative response. "Do you suppose we'll ever be that happy again?"

Walls flew up before Emma escaped her anger. "I don't remember us ever being that happy," she scathed and distanced herself to the other side of the counter under the guise of retrieving the stack of covered pancakes Ruby made for breakfast.

"We were, Emma," Regina swore breathlessly. Emma's shoulders tightened, no other indication she'd heard the words. Emma's memories of their glorious time in Boston got lost in the potion.

"Em, I'm sorry," Regina apologized softly, lovingly even. "I know you're not prepared to speak of this, but I'm truly sorry. The other half of me... _I_… I thought I'd spare you pain if you ever recovered your memories completely in my absence. I'd decided to use Zelena's portal to leave this realm the night of the dreamscape. If I'd known Ruby's body capable of healing your mind, I never… I'm sorry."

Emma sniffed, shoulders heaving. "Regina, please. I can't even begin to process how much you betrayed me."

"I wanted you to forget the horrible things you saw in my memories," Regina pushed forward, confidence growing in Emma's brokenness. "I wanted you to forget that I'd abandoned you so that you had a chance to be happy."

"Katy's being harassed," Emma changed the subject abruptly to something safer. Regina acclimated quickly. "Ruby cracked into her phone and saw a bunch of messages that people were writing to her. Threats. Perverts. We've limited her Internet usage and Ruby broke her phone, but I really think she'd benefit from speaking to you about it. You're the only one of us who really has any experience dealing with this kind of backlash." Emma laid out the situation, focusing on progress actually capable of transpiring.

"If she wishes, I'd happily listen," Regina agreed without hesitation, without thought. She loved her little warrior just as she loved Henry and Annabel.

"It's really bad. Ruby showed me some of it. There's a website and everything. I hacked it and gave it a virus, but the damage is done." Emma flexed a fist. If she ever found out who anyone of those people were, minors or not, she knew that Evil Savior ached to make an appearance to those soulless freaks with nothing better to do than emotionally torture a 16-year-old rape victim.

"Perhaps I should allow my other side free reign to search out the creator," Regina suggested, and Emma slowly faced her.

"Was that a joke?" Emma blurted, incredulous.

"Too soon?" Regina lobbed back easily.

Emma laughed out loud, startling both of them. Regina thought it the most glorious sound she'd ever heard. "I wouldn't suggest using that tactic when you talk to Katy, but…What?" Emma stopped mid-sentence at the funny expression on Regina's face.

"I've missed your laugh," Regina mumbled bashfully, cheeks flaming under the scrutinizing gaze of The Savior.

Emma smiled, head mirroring Regina's in an embarrassed bow. The days to come brought more than a few scuffles between the two, they knew it, accepted it. But this… this was a real start, a step towards healing they'd both been too afraid to take for fear of getting burned again. This Regina hadn't hurt her. This Regina loved her, fought her darker half to get back to her, and in that moment, Emma clung to the hope that maybe she loved her, too, even if her trust flopped and gasped for life on the floor.

"We should…" Emma cleared her throat and picked up the plate of pancakes, tearing the foil in her haste to remove it.

Regina picked up the stack of plates with forks on top and nodded. "Perhaps after breakfast, we might take the children to the park? Dear Alex is desperate to be outside, and Katyline and I would have a moment to speak while the girl is occupied."

"I think they'd like that," Emma agreed.

A good start.


	33. Sunshine

Thank you for the reviews, my lovelies. Enjoy!

Songs: Don't Let Me Go by RAIGN, Fix You by Mysha Didi

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><p>Regina paced the diner floor. Granny knocked off in front of CSI hours ago, but her mind twisted and flipped. The thoughts seared images behind her eyes, haunting images long-forgotten. Pain. Fear. Grief. She needed her. She needed to talk to her. She wrung her hands against her chest, pulling at the skin painfully. No, that monster committed the horrible acts flashing behind her eyes. She was a good girl. She tried to be good, for Cora, for The King, for Rumpelstiltskin. What had being good ever gotten her but more heartache? She'd been good for Emma. She'd given up everything for Emma, every shred of emotional protection she'd built for herself, and what had that maladroit savior done?<p>

She'd left her.

Emma chased Belle and left her alone in a crisis with her heart torn open for everyone to pluck at like the self-involved vultures with which she'd filled up her life. That credulous librarian piss ant. She caused this, she took Emma. Regina grabbed her head, greasy hair falling through her fingers to leave the blurred edges of insanity in her appearance. She loved Belle. Belle had become the sister she'd never had, the one Emma killed. No, Zelena needed to die. But they'd not killed her for her past misdeeds. They allowed her to live. Why? Because The Savior deemed her worthy of loving? Would they kill her now that Emma refused to love her anymore?

"I need you," she whispered to the darkness.

_Had enough, Princess? _The mocking voice answered within her mind. The deposed title struck her sharply, but she ignored it. The voice never falter, never left her. Her darkness waited patiently until she needed it in order to survive. It wrapped itself around her, a shawl against the harsh and biting winds of her pathetic life.

"We've harmed so many," she spoke to the soothing voice, her voice after years of torture and heartache.

_Fun, wasn't it? _The voice answered.

"No," Regina whimpered. "Why did we do that?"

_Let me out. I'll protect you from them._ Promises. That voice kept its promises. It always had, made her strong, made her safe. Took her from Emma. Took her from Henry and Annabel and Katy. But…

"I can't. The sun will rise soon," Regina explained, not wanting to anger the only protector she'd ever had. Rage. Hate. Violence.

_I'll behave in front of them. They'll never know. _The voice reasoned convincingly.

Regina considered it, grabbed her head as the pain started. "No!" She yelled and dropped to her knees, bruising them on the speckled linoleum. "I can't. Emma will know. She always knows."

_Emma hates you. Why do you care what she wants? She'll only leave you broken, Regina, like every other person you've trusted. Every person you've loved. _Taunts. Mockery. The dejected, sorrowful tune of her heart song.

"I love her," she admitted. The voice remained silent. "Did you hear me? I love her!" She whimpered and fell onto her elbows hard, hiding her face in them but not fighting the tears.

"Don't leave me," she pleaded, divested of every shred of dignity she'd retained. "Please don't leave me."

_I'll never leave you._ Honesty. Regina released a shaking breath, relieved.

"I thought you'd gone." She rolled onto her back and stared at the ceiling. "Could you sing to me?" She asked like a small child with a wounded knee begging for comfort. She smiled when a haunting ballad from her childhood softly started in her mind. A part of her realized that the voice couldn't possibly have added the tribal drum rhythm or the soft strings of a lyre, that she recalled a memory of her own, but she needed the comfort of her protector.

"Katyline needs me," she said softly, barely hearing herself over the tune in her mind.

_Shhh, sing with me, Darling._ The voice bade her, distracting her from the helplessness of the situation. At this point, only Katy knew what she needed and when. Maybe she needed Regina to stay far away from her. She had attempted to brainwash her in order to take the girl through the portal. She chose Katy because Henry would have known, would have seen the darkness in her eyes as he always had.

Regina squeezed her eyes shut and waited for the familiar chorus to repeat. "I am stretched on your grave, and I'll lie here forever. If your hands were in mine, I'd be sure they would not sever. My apple tree, my brightness, it's time we were together for I smell of the earth and I'm worn by the weather." Her voice carried clear and true despite the slight quiver of grief that added a beautifully tortured quality to the slow tune.

Tears trickled to her ears, and she allowed them to clog her hearing. She'd sang this very tune so many nights looking upon the vast black sky spotted with the brightness of stars in The King's palace after he'd wed her. Daniel's grave rested so far away, just as Emma's heart remained locked behind a steel vault. She placed it there and covered it up, no better than a bone to be retrieved at her whim like a stupid slobbering dog. She had no choice, right? Emma, her Emma, - The Savior and Truest Believer – would have killed The Evil Queen, like Zelena, like Cora if her mother hadn't crushed her own heart.

"Why did you give her the potion? The real reason," Regina added to the question, clarifying the exact response she wanted. She blamed her evil side instead of acknowledging her own thoughts as reality.

_You know why, Princess. _

"I don't," Regina protested like a child in trouble. "I swear I don't know." Silence. "Please tell me."

_You know why. She was dangerous to us, to you. She left you, Regina, and she was going to kill for your crimes, just as she killed Greg Mendell and Zelena. Had Rumpelstiltskin been mortal, she'd have killed him in Neverland. She's The Savior, dear heart. You cannot have expected her to love you unconditionally until the end of time, completely blind to the monster you truly are. You've begun sounding like your tragically naïve step-daughter. You were justified for attempting to enter the portal._

"No." Regina shook her head, confused by the ideas placed into her mind by the darker half of her soul. "We've all killed. I killed Pan and Ben. Ruby murdered Jacob far more savagely than I've ever taken a life." Regina shook her head again, fighting the inner demons no one would ever see. "No, that was you. You gave her the potion. You wanted to go through the portal. I had no choice. You gave me no choice!" She screamed at the voice and sat upright quickly, scrambling to her feet to pace once more.

_You tell yourself such silly things, Dear. Tell me, if you possessed such little control, why now have you seen fit to lock me away that I am of no use to you? Now, that our plan has been spoiled? Hmm?_

"Shut up!" Regina grabbed her head "You did those things. Not me. It wasn't me!"

_Laughter._

"Shut up!" Regina screamed and whipped about to send a pulse of magic crashing into a booth near the back of the diner, her hands still pressed to her temples. Fluff and metal skittered around the floor, smoking from the light blue pulse send sent into it. Her hands lowered slowly from her head when Granny's steely gaze filtered into her confusion, providing clarity. Of what, Regina failed to stick her finger on exactly.

Without words, Granny crossed behind the counter and calmly started a full pot of coffee, but even in the dim light of dawn, the trembling of her leathery hands registered easily. "You finished?" she snapped over her shoulder, not yet turning to face the insane sorceress.

"I wasn't aware you were awake," Regina mumbled sheepishly. Granny knew she'd never harm her, even as The Evil Queen, she'd never dreamed of touching her in violence. But, the darkness…

"So, you thought you'd destroy my brand new diner while I snored?" Granny snapped, more concerned than annoyed or angry.

_Silence that insolent hag!_

"No!" Regina rebelled. "No, Granny," she corrected her outburst. Granny knew. Surely, she had to. "I was angry. I'm sorry. I'll fix it." Words continued falling from her lips, but she barely understood them. She waved her hand, erasing the damage with magic.

Granny raised an eyebrow. "When are you going to tell me what's going on in there, girl?"

_Yes, dear sweet Regina. Tell her about me. Tell her that you dream of ripping out her condescending throat and feeding it to her granddaughter in a shepherd's pie._

"Shut up!" Regina grabbed her head again. She needed to run. No, she needed to sleep. No, she promised Katy and Henry that she'd join them for breakfast. Her thoughts grappled for control, and Regina shut her eyes tightly as she wavered on her sweaty pumps.

"Regina," Granny started, sighed. Her wrinkled face softened as she searched for words that fit the situation. "Regina, when you're ready to face what's happening to you, I'm here to listen."

_Do it now. Do it quick and then remove Emma when she's not looking. She still loves you, still trusts you even if she doesn't want to. The children could be ours forever. Children would never leave you._

"I think I require sleep," Regina admitted reluctantly.

"Then sleep. I'll wake you by 6:30 to get you to your babies at 7," Granny offered.

Regina shook her head vehemently. "No, I'm okay. I'll rest after breakfast." She just needed sleep. This voice spawned from delirium cause by sleep-deprivation, nothing more. That's all, she swore. She'd simply gone through a trauma when Emma lost her memories, and she failed to care for herself properly.

"How long you been talking to yourself?" Granny asked, breezy, no pressure, but Regina saw the need in her dark eyes unprotected by those wire-framed spectacles.

"Just getting some thoughts out," Regina explained with a nervous smile.

"Mhm," Granny grunted but allowed the subject to fall dormant for the moment.

_She'll tell them. You must silence her. She'll tell them our secret. They'll take the children from you. _The voice goaded her, and she closed her eyes against the dark urges it planted in her mind.

"Haven't you ever desired to simply say something aloud?" She tried a different tactic beyond denial.

"Course," Granny grunted and leaned against the server's counter and crossed her arms over her bosom. "Never told myself to shut up before. Why would I when I'm the only one around here with any sense?" If Granny joked, the darkness in her eyes and the tightness of her features hid it.

_She knows, Regina. You must eliminate the threat._

"What…" She cleared her throat and stepped against the bar directly across from the older woman. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Granny shrugged and grinned in that knowing way that pissed her off no matter which form had control. "Speak, old woman!" She demanded, feeling her control on her darker urges slip.

_Now Regina!_

"It means those damn kids have been through enough, and I've just about sit back long enough and let you idiots screw 'em up," Granny smacked her down, gave her head a spin with her words.

The voice spoke but faded. "You were going to intervene?" She sounded scared, but she felt nothing of the sort inside. She felt angry and relieved simultaneously. Granny understood why she pushed herself, why she needed to speak to herself, to her voice.

"Thought about it," Granny admitted gruffly. "You fools always seem to get your shit together before they're screwed up permanently, but I'm starting to think you never will. Those damn fool necklaces those kids are wearing are flawed."

The words paralyzed Regina. Granny spoke of them as if they were nothing better than muck she scraped from the bottom of her boot after gathering eggs in the chicken hutch. Granny's eyebrows rose and a bursting sigh vibrated her lips, but nothing more rolled over her tongue than air. She turned her back and poured two cups of coffee. Granny witnessed as much grief and inhumanity as the rest of them. She'd protected Ruby her entire life, knowing exactly what she'd done, what she could do, the beast within. She protected Ruby and sacrificed her, Regina concluded in a moment of blinding pain that undercut everything she believed about Granny. Even then, as an innocent child, Granny saw nothing worth saving.

_Now, Regina. Do it now._

"You're wrong," Regina defied the woman who had become her safe haven. "Are you suggesting it'd have been preferable to allow people like Cora and Zelena to destroy Storybrooke because our children became collateral damage? Everything we've done has been for their future, to ensure they have one."

"And now? There's no threat, Regina," she reminded her and leaned over the counter to slide a mug to her slowly. "There's just you. Belle and Ruby seem like they got it right for a change. You poisoned your amnesiac wife and attempted to leave this realm with The Dark One whom you probably intended to kill for his power once on the other side. I'm no fool, girl. Do not treat me as one," Granny pushed her a little harder.

"That wasn't me," Regina insisted. "I wasn't in control of my actions when Emma ingested that potion, nor did I desire the presence of The Dark One or to leave this realm at all. It was her."

"Evil Regina?" Granny clarified sardonically.

"Precisely," Regina snapped, glad that they finally landed on the same page.

Granny chuckled. "Girl, your denial stinks more than cow shit in July."

She turned to walk away, sipping her coffee, and Regina slung the mug of steaming liquid at her back. It splashed Granny's housecoat and hair but narrowly missed her. Regina lowered her hand, brown droplets slipping from her fingertips and merely stared at the women who had pushed her too far.

"Clean up that mess," Granny ordered and continue in an unhurried pace towards her apartment.

_Kill her, Regina!_

"Don't walk away from me!" Regina demanded. "Elizabeth, I order you to stop!"

_Reach out your hand and wrap your magic around her throat. Squeeze until the life drains from her eyes. You miss it, don't you? You miss the thrill of the kill._

Granny actually stopped and turned at that one, chuckling at the petulance. Regina stamped her foot, and Granny shook her head. "Glad to see _Good Regina_ has found her anger," she tossed over her shoulder and stepped into the darkness of the hallway, clandestinely relieved to be out of sight. She'd wondered how far Regina could be pushed before snapping. Her tolerance grew every day.

_Kill. Her. _

"What is your meaning?" She demanded, but the older woman never returned.

_Burn the diner to the ground again. You know her lungs haven't recovered completely from the last one._

"Elizabeth!" Nothing. "Granny, what do you mean?"

_Kill her!_

"Shut up!"

In a fit of rage, Regina rounded the counter and swiped a tray of coffee mugs onto the floor, followed by the neatly arranged tea display, scattering prepackaged packets to the hallway. Still, Granny remained unseen, unheard, and the voice also blissfully slipped into the abyss of her mind, locked away until she needed her again. Regina slid to the floor amongst the shards of porcelain, defeated and exhausted. Her chest panted, releasing her thoughts in breaths that her mind gratefully needn't focus on.

Gradually, that same burnt amber lifted the solitude of night. As if no time had passed, her phone blared an obnoxious sound in her pocket, and Regina came to life robotically, completing only the minimal effort necessary to kill the alarm. After a few seconds of silence, she pressed her hands into the floor to lever her body upright. A shard cut into her palm. She should have jerked, should have responded in some way towards the pain beyond fascination of the red dripping over her fingers and onto the floor.

If she chose, the light magic in her soul could have healed it easily. She almost gave in. "No," she whispered against her addiction. Everything became jumbled in the magic. Magic did this to her. Magic destroyed her over and over again, but it resided in her blood without any possible hope of extraction, only control. Magic was her oxygen, not her addiction. Even without the influence of Rumpelstiltskin, her magic eventually would have surface. Perhaps, without his influence, she'd have wielded Light Magic.

She wrapped the wounded hand in a white towel with an orange stripe down the center and closed her fist around it, holding pressure on the wound and keeping the towel in place. She waved her hand in front of her, stopped, dropped it to her side, and walked out of the diner wearing the same clothes she'd donned yesterday. Everything she owned remained at the mansion. If she received odd looks, Regina never noticed as she walked numbly towards the only place she really wanted to be. With her children. With Emma.

Emma.

She rang the doorbell and waited, jerking fingers of the uninjured hand through her hair and smoothing her clothes. Katy yanked the door open enthusiastically and pulled her into a hug. She behaved more and more like a teenager and less like a warrior every day. It soothed Regina, minuscule in the grand scheme of things, really. Progress. Any progress indicated a step in the right direction.

"You came," she said as if they'd expected her to forget or change her mind. "Your hand." She pointed to the wounded limb as she pulled back.

"I broke a mug, and I didn't want to be late," Regina explained routinely.

"Are those the same clothes you wore yesterday?" Henry asked from the top of the foyer stairs.

She swallowed her hateful remark and met the boy's eyes, remembering why she'd just walked two miles in high heels. "I'm limiting my magic use, and all of my clothes are here."

"Oh," Katy deadpanned and finally stepped aside to grant her entrance to the house. "I'll grab the first aid kit while you change."

Regina stepped through the door and swallowed thickly. "Thank you, Sweetheart." She climbed the stairs and dropped a kiss to the side of Henry's head. "I'll be down momentarily once I've changed," she promised and crossed the foyer to climb the stairs.

Emma stared from the kitchen door, Annabel in her arms gnawing on a fruit towel. "Katy, could you take Annabel? Her gums are really hurting, so keep the towel in her mouth, please," she instructed kindly and handed the infant over to their eldest.

"Should I get ready to drive?" Katy asked seriously, and Emma's heart clenched. One moment she bounced around like a puppy barking at a rope and the next she slipped into warrior mode, such was the life they'd created for her. Emma shook her head. "Should I call Belle and Ruby? I'm sure they're up."

"No, they need this time with Alex and each other. Let's not bother them until we know what's happening. I think she's okay. I just want to make sure." Henry and Katy looked skeptical and anxious. "I'll handle this. Okay?" She glanced between her two teens, shared a three-way hug with them, and then went in search of the first aid kit.

She wiped her sweaty palm on her jeans and then dialed Ruby. Though she set Katy's mind at ease, Emma also realized the potential lethality of the situation. No chances, no surprises, all bases covered… that sort of thing. Ruby picked up on the second ring. "Hey Rubes, I need a favor. Regina's off this morning. I'm about to go in and talk to her, but I want you on the line in case this turns into a shit sandwich so Belle can poof over here from the library. If it sounds okay, just hang up. If not, tell her to flash to the kitchen and get the kids, okay?"

"You got it, Ems," she piped and then a muffled voice told her that she relayed the message to Belle. "Anything else we can do?" She asked because she was Ruby, and Ruby's loyalty never died.

"You've done enough. Regina and I need to fix this ourselves. Just go talk to Stacy about that house and the wolves, and enjoy the day with your family if this goes okay," Emma let her off the hook despite how easily they would have come running. Their support was welcomed, but she and Regina eventually needed to learn how to cope with their issues without their help. After much deliberation, they'd decided last night after dinner while the kids watched a movie and they cleaned up the kitchen that Belle and Ruby needed to be scarce in the coming days unless Emma absolutely needed backup.

They agreed hesitantly, especially with Katy and Henry opening up to Ruby so beautifully, but it wasn't as though they intended to stay at the library until they got the house ready. That upset the tenuous balance and stability Alex had found in their home. So, they spent the night at the library. If Emma got technical, this house belonged to Belle and Ruby because Regina gave it to them when they'd moved to Salem. They made Regina live here after they'd returned from The Enchanted Forest so she wouldn't be alone during her pregnancy, then Emma just moved back in without one word to them about it upon her return, and then they adopted Katy without speaking to their friends first. The other two never complained, just found enough room in their hearts to love everyone and kept everyone fed and full of coffee. How much of that rang true even if she recovered her memories? They were crap friends if that she'd gotten all the facts straight.

"Emma, you still there?" Ruby's voice jerked her from the silent rant.

"Yeah," she rasped and cleared her throat.

"Okay," Ruby sounded a bit relieved. Too much responsibility weighted her thin shoulders already. They needed to get their own shit together before their pups came, and their issues held them back.

"Thanks, Rubes," Emma said quickly and stuck the phone into her back pocket, twisting about to make sure that she'd not ended the call.

Wiping her sweaty palm again, Emma knocked lightly on the door of the master bedroom. "Regina?" No response. "Regina, I'm coming in." Emma opened the door a few seconds later to find Regina simply sitting on their bed staring at the red spot on the towel, hand resting limply in her lap.

"Regina?" Emma said again and the shut the door behind her before dropping to her knees one at a time in front of the zombie. "Regina." She touched her knee with a fingertip, very non-threatening.

"Emma?" Regina breathed, confused about why her wife suddenly appeared before her.

"Regina, what's happening?" She asked, feeling genuine concern swell in her chest. She hated it, she hated Regina for making her feel that way.

"I'm sick, Emma," Regina whined as if she'd only just realized how terrifying and impossible her situation actually was. "I'm sick. She won't stop. I try to make her go away, but I become frightened of the silence and call her back."

"What the hell are you talking about? Who is she?" Emma prayed Ruby still listened while at the same time wanting to protect Regina's privacy. Ah, hell who was she kidding? Nothing remained private between the four of them for long.

"The voice. My voice. In my head," Regina explained and touched the aforementioned area with both hands. Emma retrieved the injured one before she pressed blood onto her face.

"What does the voice say?" She asked compassionately and unwrapped Regina's hand. The sorceress barely seemed to notice the rudimentary medical attention Emma gave her. She winced at the deep gash, knowing instantly that it needed stitches or magical healing, but neither of those were options at that point.

"She wants me to hurt Granny, to make her stop. She told me to hurt you," Regina confessed breathlessly but remained otherwise still and calm. Emma carefully pulled a shard of porcelain from the wound with a pair of tweezers, checking Regina's face every few seconds to ensure she'd not spooked the other women into making her a crispy critter. "She's evil, Emma. She'll kill all of you and dance on the hot coals of your pyres to desecrate you further."

Emma dabbed at the cut gently, blanking her face despite the jolt of adrenaline that surged through her at the poetic description of her dark thoughts. She looked up at her wife. "What kind of things does she say, Regina? Does she say how she wants you to hurt me or Granny?"

Regina shrugged. "Sometimes. She sings to me sometimes, when I'm afraid. She takes care of me. She's always taken care of me, protected me." She smiled sadly and closed her eyes.

Emma opened her mouth to respond, but a sad lament in the form of a song flowed over Regina's tongue. "I am stretched on your grave, and I'll lie here forever. If your hands were in mine, I'd be sure they would not sever. My apple tree, my brightness, it's time we were together for I smell of the earth and I'm worn by the weather."

Emma's eyes misted over, and she wiped her nose on a bent wrist discreetly. "That's a really beautiful song, Regina. Is there more?" She squeezed some antibacterial gel onto a nonstick gauze pad, pressed it onto Regina's hand, and then wrapped it with a roll of gauze tightly to clot the bleeding as the sorceress sang another verse of the ballad. If the bleeding hadn't stopped completely by the time Regina returned from this unnerving disorientation, the wound fell beyond her purview and into Eva or Lauren's. Maybe Lauren. At least the succubus' powers promised to keep Regina calm and comforted. She wondered briefly how Batch faired with the two chi wielders. She seemed more than happy to go with them.

Shaking her head, Emma ground her thoughts into a sharp point that poked at finding a solution to this situation that prevented bloodshed and more trauma to her children. "I only know one song that isn't by an 80's hairband," she kept the conversation going as she removed Regina's heels. "The Sunshine Song, the one I sing to Annabel."

A smile twitched one corner of Regina's mouth. The poor woman looked ready to pass out from exhaustion. "I always enjoyed listening to you sing that song," she admitted bashfully, eyes drooping either with emotion or enervation. "Emma, will you sing to me?" She asked without opening her eyes, and The Savior thought perhaps she fought tears. The anger she harbored towards the dark sorceress punched much deeper than this moment. Seeing Regina's brokenness eased it in that moment, but it lingered still in the back of her mind. For the kids, she justified the tenderness with which she handled her wife.

"You are my sunshine. My only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are grey." She touched Regina's shoulders lightly and guided the other woman to the mattress as she sang, terribly but Annabel liked it.

"You'll never know, dear, how much I love you." She covered Regina with the comforter she'd left at the foot of the bed without bothering to make it. Sitting on the bed, she dropped her head to both hands and pressed lightly against her temples, mindful of the surgical area from a few months earlier. A hand touched her thigh, and Emma grasped it tightly in both of hers, hunching over it to cry soundless but violent tears. The already slumbering woman never even notice, not that Emma expected it. Regina clearly needed to sleep, she needed to feel safe, and that happened to be in their bed.

"Please don't take my sunshine away."


	34. Boundaries

So, I have to ask all my fans who are mothers or fathers: How am I doing with Belle's pregnancy. I've never been pregnant, will never be pregnant, have not spent a significant amount of time around a pregnant woman since I was 9 or 10, and have no desire to be pregnant or have children. Thank the gods for my UG thesis advisor, I've been texting her with questions since WTD when Emma put the power into the pendants and I started pregnancy research, and she has patiently, honestly (sometimes too honestly), and quickly answered each one. She, also, randomly and luckily for me, dealt with the drool thing, which isn't overly common but I used for comedic relief.

Thank you so much for the reviews and new follows. We're getting into the meat of things, and I'm super excited about where we're going from here. Slightly different on my usual storylines with these two, but I promise there will be a resolution.

Enjoy!

Song: Innocence by Halestorm

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><p>A faint rattling pulled Regina from her slumber. Her body jerked forward, and Emma barely got the tray onto the edge of the nightstand in time to catch her before she leapt off the bed and made a run for the door. Regina struggled slightly, disoriented and scared.<p>

"Regina, calm down before I knock you in the fucking head," Emma harangued the spooked woman, irritated now that scary dissociated Regina disappeared in the clarity sleep brought.

Still grasping the sleeves of Emma's t-shirt in white-knuckled fists, Regina allowed The Savior to press her shoulders against the bed, not trapping her, just… securing her. Deep breaths filled her lungs in a conscious effort to calm her racing thoughts and gain control of her actions. Emma waited, more patient than she deserved. Sensing the end to her panic, the blonde released her and twisted to grab the tray.

"We made sandwiches for lunch because I can't really cook anything beyond bacon, pancakes, ramen, and mac and cheese," she explained and unwrapped the turkey and cheese with mustard on wheat bread with tomato and lettuce. She'd not expected Regina to wake up while she entered and wanted the food fresh for her when she had. "Henry told me that you liked it like this. He made it," she gave credit where it was due and set the two triangles of food on the plate without bothering to remove the plastic that separated the two.

"They must be unnerved by my strange behavior," Regina murmured and braced her hands to pull her into a sitting position. She winced, forgetting her hand for a moment, and clutched it to her chest as she used only one hand to complete the task.

Emma retreated to the rocking chair they'd moved into the room when Annabel was born, distancing herself from the other woman. "They're fine. I told them that you had a rough night and wasn't up to breakfast but that you'd be down to make dinner for them." Regina's eyes jerked up in shock. "They want lasagna and cookies," Emma added with a smirk.

Regina's mouth also twitched. "It's always been Henry's favorite since he grew old enough to eat it." An uncomfortable silence followed. "You've been very generous with your time this morning, Emma. Thank you. My head feels much clearer."

Emma shrugged and kicked off the floor, rocking the chair slowly. When it stopped, she repeated the motion. Regina picked up one half of the sandwich and dutifully bit off the tip but took no obvious pleasure in the act of eating. Emma watched her carefully as she disdainfully forced the sandwich down her throat and sipped from the bottled water. She seemed fine, in control. Swallowing the last bite of the half, she finally refocused her gaze on Emma.

"Where are the children?" She asked tightly with emotions Emma couldn't quite decipher.

Emma shifted in the rocking chair, slouching to the side to prop her head on a fist. "Annabel just went down for a nap about 10 minutes ago. Alex went to the park and wanted Katy to come, so she and Henry met up with them there. They'll be with Belle and Ruby the rest of the day. Apparently, Belle wants to teach them how to roller skate this afternoon, so they're at the rink until 5. I told you they're fine," Emma snipped defensively, and Regina dropped her gaze.

"Of course, I didn't mean…" She stopped, dejected, and picked at the crust of her bread. "I never meant to imply they weren't. I don't want them to see me in such a state," she admitted, embarrassed.

Emma nodded, and another silence overcame the room. Regina sipped. Emma rocked. Finally, Regina scooted further towards the headboard and sighed. "I received a phone call yesterday afternoon from the school. I intended to discuss it this morning, which is why I refrained until now. Katyline missed her final exams due to recent events and will be forced to repeat the 11th grade if she cannot take and pass them in the next week."

Emma slammed the flat of her hand against the smooth wood, and Regina flinched. "Sorry," The Savior muttered and ran a hand through her hair. "Just… people piss me off. The poor girl has been through enough. There were extenuating circumstances."

"I explained this to the principal, but given our current positions as Head of Council and your unique heritage, he feels it's important to follow a strict guideline in regards to Henry and Katy to avoid cries of favoritism. I must respect his ethic, even if I do not agree with his decision." Regina gave praise and criticism in equal force, and Emma admitted that she agreed with her assessment of the situation.

"I'm sure we'll be getting one about Henry any day now. Maybe we should call and set up a meeting with the middle school principal. I'm sure they can pass him if we can set up the same arrangement as Katy's. They're super smart kids. Too smart, sometimes," Emma added sadly, and Regina nodded as she chewed another bite of her sandwich, a thin finger poised against her lips.

"We fucked up, Regina. We dropped the ball," Emma accused both of them angrily. They should be angry with themselves. They had no business with kids. She'd sworn her entire life to be better than the crap foster parents she got stuck with. They cared enough to get their checks, which meant she barely made it to school the minimum amount required to avoid truancy and barely passed her classes. No one else cared, why should she have cared? She never thought she'd have a future beyond working at McDonald's or repeating time in prison for stealing or breaking and entering. She behaved just like those people, thinking of herself above the needs of a child.

"We'll correct our mistakes, Emma," Regina soothed the other woman calmly, switching emotional positions with her easily. "So much of our lives the past few months since Zelena's attack has been about meager survival. We cannot be expected to behave as though nothing affected us. I regret that a boy as brilliant as our son may have to spend a year relearning everything he already knows, but I also believe that we've done the best we could in the situations thrust upon us by the ambitions of others."

"No, just stop. God, we don't get to do that. We don't get to sweep our failures under the rug and shrug our shoulders and say that we did our best." Emma came to her feet and paced frantically. That's what they did. _Emma's a difficult child. We've done the best we could, but it's just not going to work out._

"Emma, I'm sorry. Please calm down," Regina tried to break through Emma's sudden anger, but The Savior only paced. "Emma?"

"When are you going to take responsibility, Regina? When are you going to stand up and admit to what you've done without blaming everything else for your fuck ups? I'm right here with you, telling you that I fucked up just as badly, and still you can't even fathom the possibility that we've been terrible parents because we're selfish, not because of extenuating circumstances. Fucking hell, Belle did a better job of keeping Henry on a schedule during a fucking war than we're doing now."

Emma's chest heaved. Flush crept up her neck and pooled in her cheeks, an emblem and promise of more rage lurking just beneath the surface. When no response followed the outburst, Emma shook her head sadly and murmured, "You make me sick," before charging from the room.

The words hit Regina's chest with a sledge hammer, and for a long time, the only thing she felt capable of doing was breathing in and out. The pain reminded her that she still lived. Something wiggled in the back of her mind, that voice. "No," she told it.

"No," she stated more firmly, but the pain started in a slow throb anyway, one that increased with the pounding of her heart. "She's angry. I betrayed her. Leave her alone," Regina pleaded desperately, still the pain increased.

She grabbed her temples, rocking back and forth. It wouldn't help. Nothing helped once that darkness sunk its vicious claws into her heart. "Leave her alone. Don't hurt her," Regina begged shamelessly. Tears burned her eyes from the physical anguish, perhaps a manifestation of her inner turmoil.

Suddenly, the pain stopped, and Regina raised her head slowly, stretching her neck to one side. "Of everything you've done, you're concerned about me harming her," she said to the now weaker voice in her head, pitching to mock and worry. The words came out in a harsh accusation instead of a question, and The Queen clicked her tongue at her counterpart.

_Don't hurt her._

Regina sneered, wishing for the ability to physically strangle that voice. "You forget, dear, that The Savior is not a child. Everyone tiptoes about her as though she were a fragile piece of china about to fall off the shelf and hit her pretty head. She's not as fragile as you perceive her to be, you spineless prude. She's an incredibly strong and powerful woman. I'll prove it to you, would you like to see?"

With the patience of a cat, she carried the tray down stairs and placed it on the island. A snap of her fingers transformed her clothes into pressed black slacks and a crisp white shirt. Knee-high boots wrapped around her calves, compressing them in a comforting and familiar way that made her feel powerful. Closing her eyes, she reached out with her intuition, seeking Emma's presence by locating her magic in the immediate vicinity. She grinned maliciously and poured a cup of coffee that Emma obviously just made before bringing lunch because not one drop had been consumed yet. On a whim and to drive home her point, she poured a second cup for Emma, preparing it to her preference of milky syrup.

Emma glanced up from her hands when Regina entered the patio and sat on the wicker chair across from the small table off to the side from the eating area. Readjusting her elbows on her knees, Emma lowered her head again. "Not now, Regina."

"I'm terribly sorry for y behavior, Emma," she apologized sweetly and sat Emma's cup near The Savior's knee. "You're correct. I've been avoiding responsibility for my actions."

Emma raised her head slowly, a faint grin on her lips. "I wasn't expecting that," she admitted a bit sheepishly. She'd underestimated Regina. She fought herself like hell. She wanted to be here, to get better.

"You're right, Emma. I've been afraid to accept the consequences of this situation. Given my spectacularly terrible decisions, I was afraid I'd be alone in bearing the brunt of our current positions. I see now that you're mature enough to stand at my side even if you'd rather gnaw it off at the moment." Regina smiled tightly at her, covering the expression a moment later under the guise of sipping her coffee.

Emma looked suspiciously at hers. Regina rolled her eyes, leaned forward, and took a large enough gulp of the sugary liquid to prove that she'd actually swallowed some. She crossed her legs prettily and played the part of ashamed sorceress. Damn fools. Her magic set kingdoms to trembling with the mere mention of her ruthless ambition. She should have been worshipped, not tapped on the nose like a naughty puppy who chewed her owner's favorite pair of shoes.

"Regina," Emma started, unable to stop the smile on her face. She sipped the coffee pointedly, crossing the bridge of forgiveness just a bit more. "That means so much to me. I'm really trying here. I'm really pissed at you, but I don't want the kids to see that, y'know. I think we can both agree that they need us to do better."

Regina nodded and sipped her coffee, allowing the seemingly comfortable silence to surround them. Playing her lighter counterpart proved easier than expected. So much for The Savior always detecting which side she presented. In a grand show, she switched seats to share the loveseat Emma currently occupied but kept her distance to the very edge, not crowding her too soon.

"Emma," she started, stopped, picked at the mug with a thumbnail. "Will you tell me what you're feeling? I know you're angry, but I've never been skilled in apologies or coping with wounded pride. Will you tell me what I can do to help this situation?"

Emma studied the tight shoulders, the distant eyes. Regina looked nervous and sorrowful. She sighed deeply and followed it with a gulp of coffee. "I don't know. I think I'm still in shock about the whole thing. I mean, you actually gave me a potion. You poisoned my food or drink or whatever. When?"

Regina touched her shoulder and set her mug onto the glass table simultaneously. "The day after your wolf experience. I slipped it into the broth I gave you. You became so much happier in that moment. Do you remember? When we spoke of ending our marriage and you suddenly felt so much hope and wonder in your connection to me?" Emma nodded. "That's the moment the potion seized your memories."

"Shouldn't I have felt empty?" Emma pondered, not quite sure what Regina wanted her to learn from this explanation, maybe nothing. Regina scooted closer, just a smidge, and took Emma's hand, setting the injured on top lightly. Emma accepted the comfort with a tiny squeeze of her hand. Anger only exacerbated the situation, so she sought answers while Regina gave of them freely.

"I presume that you forgot the memories gleaned in the dreamscape or perhaps something darker from our past. We've been through so many ordeals in such a short amount of time. I'm so sorry, Emma. If I'd only known Ruby's body capable of healing you, I'd have waited. Perhaps my mind might have been spared," she added quietly, and Emma squeezed her hand again.

"Yeah, I can't imagine how scared you must be. You really freaked me out earlier. I had Ruby on the phone the whole time. She's pretty weirded out, too." Emma leaned her shoulder into Regina's, rocking the queen a bit.

"That silly mutt worries far too much," Regina sniped but maintained a playful demeanor.

Emma smiled. "I'm really happy for her and Belle. Her pups are going to be adorable, and have big mouths when they learn to speak," she laughed. Regina hummed and smiled at the image of Belle and Ruby with two infants plus Alex. They'd definitely be distracted for a while.

"I'd like to see you pregnant," Regina blurted suddenly, and The Queen almost dropped her façade when she realized how much she actually meant it. Emma stiffened and started pulling away. They were having a moment, but she doubted very much their ability to find enough stability to bring another child into this world. "Relax, it's merely a thought, not a request," Regina assured her, and Emma left her hand between Regina's.

"Perhaps, true love's kiss will repair my mind," Regina suggested, and Emma's heart tugged towards her wife. "You do still love me, don't you?" A flicker of panic crossed Regina's eyes, and Emma bit the inside of her jaw as she nodded tightly, barely moving her head in the rapid succession. Despite the darkness, Regina's heart pushed her closer to Emma. She felt their blood oath, even this part of her mind. It made sense. She shared the heart with her doppelganger, same heart but different magic.

"Could it hurt to try? I know that it does not erase all that I've done, but I'd rather spend the rest of my life making it up to you as a whole person than two halves of a broken woman." Regina's dark eyes flicked to her mouth, her own lips parting slightly. "Please, Emma, may I kiss you?"

Emma swallowed in hesitation but felt her body leaning towards Regina anyway. "Regina, I have never hated or loved anyone so equally in my entire life," she whispered, her coffee-scented breath puffing over Regina's mouth.

A pink tongue peeked out, wetting her lips before she said in a husky rumble, "Perhaps, this will sway you towards the stronger emotion."

"Regina," Emma whispered, those older emotions surging forward to seize her heart.

She closed the distance between them, unable to stop the tension from leaving her body upon first contact. They simply held their lips together for a few seconds, and then Emma moved first, suckling at Regina's upper lip. They knew this dance. They'd always sucked at talking, but this, their bodies spoke beautifully. A callused hand sank into Regina's hair, pulling her closer. Regina's held the side of her neck tenderly, thumb brushing her jawbone.

When Emma moved forward to either lay her back or straddle her, a bark of laughter broke the kiss. Emma pulled back, confused but willing to overcome the new obstacle. "What?" She whispered, a bright smile on her cheeks.

Regina laughed again, harsh and mocking this time distancing herself from the softer emotions Emma made her want to feel. Those emotions were never meant for the likes of The Evil Queen. Emma's heart sank. "A few words and carefully placed touches, and The Savior yields to the woman she claims to loathe. Tragically poetic, isn't it?"

Emma registered her actions after the fact. She never remembered snagging her coffee cup or the reverberation of the solid object hitting Regina's jaw. Not until they both sat covered in coffee and blood dripped down Regina's cheek from the slight split just below and to the side of her dazed right eye had Emma's brain fully reconciled with her actions. She stunned the other woman but hadn't knocked her unconscious, which took far more strength than most people thought, but she got her point across. The abrupt assault caught Regina off-guard and left her head ringing. She'd expected Emma to lash out physically but not quite so brutally. She'd crossed a line even she felt bad about.

"Get out," Emma hissed and dropped the cup to the deck to shatter as she left the still silent woman on the back porch and locked the patio door behind her.


	35. Mothers First

Hopefully this clears some confusion. My god these two have so much psychology. Enjoy!

Songs: Super Psycho Love by Simon Curtis, Untouched by The Veronicas

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><p>Emma flipped her wedding band again. The wide silver band with the swirling, crisscrossing designs spun a few times, fell over, made large swooping ovals on the table, and then fell silent, dead, probably cool. She glanced at Annabel happily playing within her pen. She gnawed a set of plastic rings, held it in her mouth to move to a new spot, then fell back on her butt to repeat the process all over again. She smiled at the infant, who grinned back like a little possum, laughed at something she deemed hilarious, and then threw the set of keys against the mesh siding of the pen.<p>

The smile faded when the air pressure changed suddenly as the front door opened. Henry sprinted to the foyer, skidded to a stop and hooked a hard right into the kitchen. "Ma, Aunt Belle is awesome on skates. She and Aunt Ruby did a lot of cool tricks, and she used her magic to keep me from falling the whole time, but Katy faceplanted. It was awesome," he summed up their entire trip to the roller rink succinctly in two sentences spoken almost too quickly with his cracking and shaking voice that had been changing for a while now. He'd sound like man soon.

"Where's Mom?" He asked, finally noticing the absence of his other mother. She swiped her wedding band from the table quickly and slid it onto her finger as she hid them between her knees. He wasn't stupid. He'd seen the movement, knew what it meant.

Katy, Belle, and Ruby with a groggy Alex over her shoulder filed in with ample time to hear the question, and Emma looked at the other two adults helplessly. "You're mom's not coming for dinner tonight. We had a fight." She figured honesty the best policy for all involved. She pinched the front of his shirt between her thumb and forefinger and tugged gently, hoping to soothe him.

"What about?" He sought understanding. Why couldn't they just get along like they used to? Emma did stupid stuff, Regina thought it endearing. He knew they had lots of sex, had secretly purchased his big headphones to drown it out when their need became greater than sparing his innocent mind.

"We…" Emma cleared her throat. "The Queen and I had a disagreement about how exactly to break the memory spell and put her back together." Guilt burned hotly in her chest. Her stomach hurt from it, churning and swirling with the image of Regina bleeding by her hand. She'd forced herself to pick up the phone and call Regina a thousand times and talked herself out of it a thousand and one. She expected these sorts of tricks and games from The Queen. If she'd been in the right headspace, she probably would have found the whole thing funny.

"Hey, Bud, let's go put that movie in that we bought. Belle and I will make some dinner, okay?" Ruby stepped up, sensing the deeper rumblings in her friend. More happened, she knew it, but it involved something she felt unable to tell her son.

"Any requests?" Belle asked. They'd gone a long way that day to putting his anger and mistrust of her to bed.

"Yeah, Mom's lasagna," he muttered dejectedly and pushed through his family to leave the room. He doubted that she'd shared that recipe with any of them yet. Ruby knew Granny's but Regina put a special ingredient into all the recipes she learned to make them her own. Ruby met her gaze sympathetically and then turned to chase Henry.

"Sorry, I'm late!" A raspy voice called from the foyer, and everyone startled.

"Mom!" Henry yelled, and they made it to the foyer in time to witness the happy embrace. "What happened to your face?" He asked as they separated, horror on his features.

"Oh, this?" She waved her hand and smiled. "I went to see Archie earlier and accidentally tripped over Pongo. That lazy dog didn't even move." She gave a little laugh, and Belle, Ruby, Emma, and Katy almost believed her story. Regina had perfected her acting skills. Better than expected. Maybe they all wanted to believe it so badly that she fooled them, even though they knew the truth.

She hugged him again. "I suppose your mother's clumsiness has finally rubbed off on me," she jabbed at Emma lightly, selling it, and even Katy grinned tightly. "Would you like to help me in the kitchen? It seems I am in need of a hero tonight. And you, Katyline, would you like me to teach you my secret sauce recipe?" Regina set her caramel eyes upon her eldest and smiled brightly when Katy's spread on her cheeks. She nodded enthusiastically.

"Excellent. Everyone else, out," Regina ordered as she entered the kitchen flanked by her kids tucked beneath her arms. "Oh, and perhaps we should make brownies instead of cookies tonight to spare poor Belle the scent of cinnamon, hmm?" The kids murmured their disappointed agreements, and then something happened that had never happened in the history of the Swan-Lucas household. Regina unlatched the swinging kitchen door and closed it, protecting her recipe as much as her time with the children.

"You may check on me every five minutes if you wish, but I'd like to cook in peace with my children," she explained. Emma only nodded silently and then…

"Regina, show me your magic," she instructed just as the door swung shut. On the following swing, Regina poked her head around the corner and held out her uninjured hand to produce light blue sparks. She fooled Emma earlier, but her magic told the truth. Emma nodded again, granting her permission for what it was worth and then glanced between her friends.

"What the hell just happened?" Emma wondered rhetorically.

"That's what I'd like to know," Ruby said darkly and rubbed her daughter's back, refusing to ask what she really wanted in the girl's presence. She loved her Temma and Adgie.

"I'll explain later," Emma promised. "Or you could go put Alex down for a quick nap while Belle and I go sit on the front stoop and she can tell you later." Ruby nodded in satisfaction and climbed the stairs with her grumpy little girl.

Belle patiently waited until they sat knee-to-knee before speaking. Pulling in a deep breath of the fresh evening air, she reminded herself to keep an open mind. She and Ruby scuffled physically more than once. "Are you okay?"

Emma snorted and rested her forearms on her knees. "I hit her with a coffee cup two seconds after I fell into the emotional trap The Queen set and almost suggested we go to our bedroom to work out our issues in orgasms," she explained, monotone.

Belle touched her arm. "The Queen pretended to be… we need a better name for Regina's halves."

"Exactly. I thought I was about to make love, which could have gone so far right now. It… she feels right, Belle, and when she's this person, everything feels better, like the past few months never happened. I can't remember her, but I feel her. Her dark half…" Emma sighed harshly. She'd seen that side of Regina before, she felt certain of it.

"You feel her in a different way?" Belle probed hesitantly.

"I want to hurt her," Emma confessed, even as the guilt of that statement shot bile up her throat. A part of her wondered if her stomach would ever feel settled again. "I want her to pay for what she did to me, but it's more than that. Our hearts are still connected, even when she's The Queen, but it's… I have no idea how to describe this." Emma dropped her head between her knees and covered the back of her neck with trembling hands. She'd assaulted the mother of her children.

"Primal," Belle supplied like she knew exactly what Emma wanted to say, and The Savior raised her head. "Ruby and I just had this conversation a few nights ago. Her wolf and my sorceress aren't that different from Regina's magic and your darker half that you try so desperately to hide."

Emma glared. "I'm not hiding anything."

Belle's eyebrows shot towards the pink and orange sky. "You hit Regina with a mug for playing what equivocates a practical joke in the mind of The Queen, and I haven't seen Amelia in three days." Belle held her ground against the deepening anger flushing Emma's cheeks.

"Yeah, I fucked up, okay. I'll make it right," Emma sulked and crossed her arms.

"Maybe that's your problem, Savior," Belle muttered and wrapped her arms around jean-clad thighs. She needed bigger clothes.

"The fuck is that supposed to mean?"

"My entire life, I've always believed that if I did the brave thing, the right thing, then bravery would inevitably follow. So, I never ran. I stood and fought until my mind broke and my body failed me. I ran, Emma. I ran because I didn't know what else to do. I knew it was the wrong thing in the eyes of so many people. I knew that I hurt people, that the consequences of that one decision would follow me for a long time once I'd returned." Belle smiled as images of their night of acceptance filtered through her brain.

"I really hate you for being able to run like that. I've fought that urge since I woke up with amnesia," Emma admitted honestly. Belle could take it. The librarian squeezed her forearm again, not the slightest bit affronted by the harsh words.

"Then find the equivalent that works for you." Emma leaned into her, loving this new and improved Belle. She felt closer to the woman now that she wasn't being so damn good all the time.

"If I had the chance to make the decision again, I'd make the exact same one." Emma's brow furrowed in confusion. She'd really not expected that. Belle squeezed her arm warmly and then took her hand. "I found something out there, Emma. I behaved oppositely to everything I believed in, everything I'd ever done, and I found something in my heart that had been missing my entire life."

"Maybe I need to explore these urges?" Emma asked for clarity of Belle's insightful sharing session. Belle shared very little, just bits here and there when it boiled over the rims of that incredibly forgiving and compassionate heart.

"I'm not suggesting you run about bashing people with glassware, but maybe you need to stop being The Savior and just be Emma. Emma Swan, before all this savior nonsense, was gruff and physical and violent with provocation. Regina's not the only person who has been denying her darker side." She smiled again and tucked hair behind Emma's ear as Emma sprinted off into the labyrinth of her jumbled thoughts and feelings. "If Regina is what you still want, in your heart, then perhaps the potion has been a blessing in disguise. You've been through far more than any couple should be capable of withstanding, and I've watched it slowly rip you apart to the point of being unable to even speak to each other properly. Maybe this is the fresh start you've both been seeking."

Belle fell silent, and Emma dissected her words. They made so much sense, and yet the anger in her heart rutted deeper. Her friend sensed the need for privacy and gave a one-armed hug around her shoulders in support.

"Do the unexpected, Emma, and you might find more than you expected within yourself," Belle offered as parting wisdom and kissed the side of her head. "I'll check on our kids."

Emma nodded absently, hearing the words without actually acknowledging them. Her eyes fixated on a piece of stone in the walkway until it blurred and meant nothing. Everyone expected her to be angry and then eventually forgive Regina. Hell, she expected that, too. Wasn't it supposed to be that way? She knew what she felt. Lost, not angry. Not really. If she knew the exact reason why Regina gave her that damnable potion, maybe she'd have felt differently. Even for The Evil Queen slipping that into her food seemed backhanded, something a coward had done.

"So, why did you do it?" Emma wondered aloud.

"You talk to yourself these days as well?" A raspy voice teased behind her.

Emma glanced over her shoulder. "Why did you give me that potion?" Regina sighed and stepped onto the stoop, closing the door and prying wolf ears inside. She leaned against it but offered no further explanations.

"You've been staring at the ground for an hour, and that's the only thing you wish to say?

"Let me see her," Emma said suddenly, not even aware the words were in her mind until they flowed out of her mouth. Standing, she faced her worst nightmare, Regina without a soul. At least part of her.

"I cannot, Emma. She's cruel. I'm so very sorry for her behavior," Regina apologized, sincere, kind, compassionate. Everything Emma expected it to be. Belle was right, usually was.

"Why?" Emma repeated, and Regina dropped her chin to her chest. In an instant, Emma had her hands pinned above her head, bodies pressed tightly. "Let her out," she demanded.

"Emma, please stop," Regina begged. "The children are waiting." The tactic might have worked an hour ago, but Emma accepted her anger, embraced it for the moment. She wanted answers.

"Let her out." She pulled Regina's wrists away from the wall and slammed them against the door.

Regina smirked, and Emma felt the immediate energy shift. "Always knew you wanted to top, Savior."

"Why did you give me the potion?" Emma repeated the question everyone wanted the answer to recently.

Regina smiled and pushed her chest into Emma's, loving the feeling of Emma's heaving breasts pressing tightly against her. A pink tongue poked out and licked Emma's upper lip. "Come closer, Savior," she bade softly and rolled her hips into Emma's.

Emma ignored the fuzzy feeling pulling through her and bowed her head, bringing her ear closer to Regina's mouth. Regina nipped an earlobe and grinned at the resulting shudder. "I didn't give you that potion. Subtly has never been my strong suit."

Emma dug blunt nails into Regina's wrists and pushed back without releasing Regina. "You're lying."

"Why do you think she keeps me locked away, dear? I'm a convenient scapegoat. The poor dear needs me for protection, to take responsibility where she lacks the strength. She married The Savior who has a nasty habit of killing every big bad who strolls near Storybrooke." She smirked. "How long until you knifed your lover… or broke her neck?" She touched her tongue to a canine, enjoying the shocked expressions flickering over Emma's hyper-expressive face.

"You haven't taken credit," Emma blubbered absently, only now realizing the small detail. "You're a psychopath, you don't care if you hurt me. Your other half does." They locked eyes for a moment, and Emma saw the harsh truth lurking there.

"She poisoned me because she was afraid that we'd all turn on her when you finally took full control because she thought I couldn't accept her completely," Emma finally deciphered the mystery. It hurt but also made her feel very sorry for Regina.

"I've been blamed long enough for crimes I have not committed," The Queen cleared her name, allowing Emma a moment to see the truth in her eyes.

"Why did you pretend to be her?"

"I grew bored with your pathetic, wounded puppy act. Since when does The Savior stand idly while someone is actively harming her? I reminded you who were," The Queen explained calmly, coldly… honestly. And then, in a softer voice Emma hadn't expected, "I'm strong enough to endure your wrath, Emma. Are you strong enough to acknowledge it?"

A surprised gasp tore from her lips when Regina flipped their positions, trapping Emma's hands in the same position in her distraction. The Savior returned the impassioned kiss, raising her hips to rub herself on the thigh between hers. Regina tsked and stepped away, magically binding her hands to the door and stilling Emma's hips with her own.

"What will the neighbors think?" She asked condescendingly. "Snow's pride and joy getting fucked by her evil wife in full view of the public." Regina closed her eyes, her mind obviously going somewhere similar. Her breathing increased.

"Though I'll admit, the thought of you tied in the square, bared and writhing, at the whim of whomever happened by has appeal. I'd encourage them to punish my little whore," Regina dropped into her ear in a sultry rumble that had Emma squirming. She'd never thought of the possibility of others watching before, but…

"Regina," she moaned. She'd intended the name to be cautionary, not a desperate plea. Regina smirked and cupped her through her jeans, heat radiating from the increased blood flow.

"What would mommy think if she knew how filthy her little girl behaved? Would she spank you?" The thought should have disgusted her, but Emma felt herself growing wetter at the thought of Regina commanding anyone to acknowledge Emma's darkness. There had to be a mommy issue in there somewhere, the need to be told what a good girl she was. To be seen. That's what Belle meant. She needed to allow the diseased parts of her to be visible in order for healing to start. Do the unexpected.

"Regina, I need you to let me up. Stop, Red, whatever our safe word was," Emma said, unable to stave the panic. Regina released her immediately and then caught her as she fell forward, confirming they had indeed explored this type of relationship. Even in their current condition, Regina offered the emotional support she needed, reassurance after she'd pushed too far. Emma wrapped trembling arms around Regina's shoulders and pressed her face into her neck.

"Touch a nerve, Savior?" Regina taunted.

"Shut up," Emma snapped and hugged her tighter. After a moment, Regina's arms circled her back lightly, solidifying whatever just happened between them, within Emma. "I fucking hate you," Emma seethed in her ear, pulling her closer at the same time. Regina stood strong and allowed her to recover as slowly or quickly as she needed.

"Thank you for telling me the truth," she whispered into Regina's neck after a few minutes. She fiddled with strands of black hair hanging at Regina's neck. The Queen stiffened. "Do you want to stay for dinner?" That got her attention.

"You want me to influence the minds of your children? What a delectable thought," Regina threatened smoothly, but Emma saw through it, saw through the façade. She'd seen a similar expression in the cave. She might have been The Evil Queen, but something within this Regina desired rest, peace. She may not be able to love with this part of her mind, but she wasn't incapable of compassion and she felt a connection with their kids. The Queen would never hurt them, well, the kids anyway.

Do the unexpected.

Emma held Regina's neck lightly and pulled back enough to press a chaste kiss to those blood red lips. "Stay for dinner. The truth is that we're both unstable right now. I totally tried to force myself on Amelia. I mean, I hit you with a fucking mug, Regina."

"I can take it, Emma," Regina assured her distraught wife. "The princess in my subconscious can't, but I can."

"That's not the point, Regina," Emma snapped sullenly. Tenderly, she probed the area around the cut and the giant bruise. "I shouldn't have done that no matter how much you piss me off. There have to be limits. Angry sex is one thing, but this…"

Regina caught her hand and pressed her knuckles to her mouth, gazing up at her with hooded eyes. "In your mind, my actions earlier are negated by yours?" Emma nodded, and Regina kissed her fingers again. "I'll stay for dinner," she whispered around the hand still against her mouth.

Emma smiled tightly, but it never reached her eyes. "If you're good, maybe you can stay the night." Maybe The Evil Queen needed someone to believe in her as much as Emma needed someone to see her as a whole person.

The Queen stared after the impish savior as she reentered the house, leaving her on the stoop to ponder the slightly suggestive offer. Whatever Belle said nearly an hour prior obviously affected The Savior on a deeper level. In her best political appearance, Regina clasped one hand over the other in front of her hips and followed The Savior.

"That is not exactly what I meant," Belle was saying when she reached the top of the foyer steps, clearly they'd underestimated her wolf hearing abilities.

"It'll be fine," Emma assured the librarian and then reached back to take Regina's hand, which The Queen offered up freely.

Emma led them to the dining room where the rest of the family awaited their arrival. Katy's eyes narrowed, immediately sensing the difference in the energy around her mothers. Emma swallowed thickly, and Regina squeezed her hand supportively. Supportively? Had the other Regina slipped out in the tender affection they currently showed? Regina rolled her eyes and sighed, seemingly bored and disinterested. Nope.

"Everyone, The Queen will be having dinner with us tonight," she explained and observed the dropped jaws and coiled shoulders. In a show of submission disguised as respect, Emma pulled out Regina's seat at the head of the table and pushed it beneath her as she sat. Katy and Henry sat on either side of her, and Emma happily took a seat between Henry and Ruby who seemed the least bothered by this arrangement. She and Regina had always accepted and appreciated the darkness within the other.

"So quant," Regina said in a forced pleasantry, and Emma choked.

"Has your idiocy eclipsed your ability to breathe properly, dear?" They shared a dark look, and Emma raised a cautionary eyebrow.

Ruby laughed, breaking the tension. "You do choke a lot. I don't know how you taste anything." She dipped out lasagna as they pass plates around.

"Says the woman who routinely munches on wild animals," Emma muttered, still tasting the bile from the day after.

Ruby slugged her arm, and Regina jerked visibly at the head of the table, hand grasping her fork with ashen knuckles. Heat flushed Emma's chest, and she shook her head slightly a moment before she returned the punch. Yeah, she liked this Regina. This Regina told the truth without mincing words. This Regina obviously wanted to protect her even if she viewed her as a possession. Maybe… maybe not a possession, maybe a challenge, an equal. Whatever the reason, Emma felt safe in the presence of the crude, harsh, abrasive woman she thought she'd struggle to the very end to accept.

She actively avoided Belle's wide eyes at the other end opposite Regina, suspecting that she understood the entire interaction as well as they had. A timer in the kitchen broke the thick tension, and Emma jumped up. "I'll get them."

"Make sure to cover them so they'll keep warm, dear," Regina instructed in a sultry tone.

When Emma reached the kitchen, she tended to the brownies, tucking foil over the edges of the cake pan, and then pulled out her cell phone. _I'm bringing a full glass of water with me to the table. If you misbehave, I'll take a drink. If the glass is empty by the end of dinner, you have to go back to Granny's. _She sent the text to Regina, hoping she checked her phone, and then filled a glass from the spout on the freezer door.

She lingered. Pinched a corner of the brownies and ate it, delicious as usual. Finally, her phone buzzed. _What makes you think I care either way, Savior?_ Emma smirked and tucked her phone away, satisfied that she'd gotten Regina's full attention. This felt good. This felt much better than the indescribable anger she'd carried around for days. Regina understood exactly what she wanted to do. She wanted her to hurt, to be at her mercy, but she also needed Regina to make her feel safe. She needed to hurt Regina and she needed to be dominated by her. Perhaps it was some twisted form of self-punishment, but the idea of being The Queen's plaything already had her spitting in her boy shorts.

She sat the glass beside her milk when she returned to the table and raised an eyebrow at Regina as she sat. The Queen smirked. "You did manage to remove them from the oven without destroying them, didn't you, Miss Swan?" Emma held her gaze and took a small sip of water. Regina's eyebrows jumped.

"The brownies are safe," she informed everyone, and they all seemed to sigh in relief. Emma stopped mid-bite and lowered her lasagna. "Am I really that dangerous in the kitchen?"

Sheepish smiles and shifty eyes. "Really?" Emma blundered.

"Dear, do you remember the boiled egg incident? You forgot and returned to find them exploded all over the stove and vent," Regina piped up first. Ruby snickered and bumped shoulders with her.

"Or when you tried to make a cake and the center was a big gooey hole and the outsides were too burnt to eat," Henry mumbled behind a bowed head and large bite of broccoli, which he dutifully ate first to please his mother.

"The last time you made me a sandwich, you cut your finger when you cut it in half and bled all over it, so I ended up making it myself," Katy added to the growing list.

They laughed at that one, riling each other up. Belle came next. "Last Halloween when you attempted to make sugar cookies to decorate. You used too much sugar and they melted in the oven." More laughter.

"Okay, I get it, slobber jaws," Emma bit at Belle, not really upset.

Belle's mouth dropped open in gleeful surprise. She tore off a piece of a roll and tossed it at Emma, hitting her cheek. Henry, Katy, and Alex cackled. It was the most glorious sound in the whole damn world, and it set the tone for the evening, with the adults cutting up as much as they might expect from the teens.

By the time they started on brownies, Emma had one drink of water left in her glass, and Regina nervously shifted her eyes to it every time she spoke. It gave Emma a little thrill, to know how badly Regina wanted to stay. The Queen hid it less and less as her desperation increased with each sip.

Emma smirked in triumph, self-satisfied and gloating as she bit into the first piece of gooey brownie. Regina wiggled her fingers beneath the table, and Emma moaned as the magic stimulated her already throbbing clit like the low setting on a vibrator. Just enough to send her wild. She glanced around the table quickly and shrugged.

"Really good brownies," she mumbled and shoved the rest of the square into her mouth.

Eventually, they all sat full and sated, their hunger for food and family slaked. Belle yawned and swiped her face, obviously the pregnancy fatigue got to her as they all knew it would. Emma smiled. Belle looked really happy, even slobbering all over the place and miserable with puking. Alex, also catching onto her Mama's exhaustion, climbed into her lap and snuggled down. Ruby about keeled over from the amount of cute those two exuded, and Emma chuckled.

"I think it's time to go wallow in food comas," Emma suggested and received a round of affirmations. "Henry, you get the dishes to the kitchen and put the food away. Katy, you can wash, but Regina and I need to talk to you first."

"We should be getting Alex to bed. Sure you don't want help cleaning up?" Ruby offered, but Emma shook her head. Her kids needed some chores anyway.

They all bid the smaller family goodnight and then waved them off to the library before Henry set to work while Emma, Regina, and Katy moved to the living room. She sat nervously at the edge of the loveseat while Regina settled onto the sofa and Emma leaned on her knees on the coffee table. Katy glanced between the two, growing more agitated with each passing second

"It's quite alright, Katyline," Regina assured her. "We've received a call from the principal about your final exams. He's graciously offered to allow you to take them and advance to your senior year due to the extenuating circumstances surrounding your absences if successful."

"Oh," Katy deflated and slouched into the couch. "Fine. That's fine. I can do that. That all?" Hazel eyes flickered between the two adults.

"Did you expect something else?" Emma asked, sensing how off the girl felt.

"Uhh," her cheeks turned red, and she mumbled, "I talked to Ruby about birth control. I thought she said something." Chewing her bottom lip, the teen averted her gaze to anywhere but her mothers. Emma squeaked, reacting much the same way Ruby initially had, while Regina sat with a blank face and gauging eyes.

"And you're certain this is what you want?" Regina asked, taking the lead. Katy nodded. "Is there a boy you've considered becoming involved with so soon after your last relationship?" She heard the implied question: You sure you're mentally stable after being abused?

"No, I just want to be ready next time. I can't go through losing another baby, and I am the last thing an innocent child needs right now," Katy answered honestly if a bit petulantly, distancing herself from the pain of her miscarriage and the uncomfortable subject of sex.

Emma and Regina glanced at each other, neither really sure how to proceed. If Katy wanted to have sex, she wasn't going to ask their permission. With a deep breath, Emma nodded, and Regina returned it. "Okay, kid, I'll call Addison tomorrow and get it set up."

Katy's eyes lit up in surprise. "Really?"

Emma nodded. "You're smart to want to be ready, even if you might not be ready for a while emotionally." She smiled when Regina brushed a hand over her back, supporting her. Had the light side emerged once again? She ignored the thought and pushed forward, "If you want to talk, we're here, okay. Just…just keep us in the loop. We know you're not going to ask permission, but after the last guy…" Emma held up a hand when Katy opened her mouth to protest.

"Wait," she ordered, and Katy crossed her arms huffily. "After what happened with Ben, we need to know who you are with and what you are doing. We gave you far too much freedom, and it not only left us devastated, but we nearly lost you, too. You knew there would be ramifications for your actions, and this is one of them."

Katy nodded reluctantly. "Fine, if I start dating someone, I'll tell you."

Emma nodded and squeezed her knee. "That's all we ask. That and no more sneaking out of the house in the middle of the night to go to the youth center." Katy rolled her eyes but kept her mouth shut. She'd known this was coming, and as much as she rebelled against being told what to do, she also felt elated that Emma and Regina had finally started working together again.

"Fine. Can I go do the dishes now? Batch wants to come over and watch the movie with us," she snapped.

Emma chuckled and gestured towards the foyer. "Go. Be nice to your brother and check if Annabel is still sleeping, please." Katy bolted from them, miffed at the stricter guidelines they'd set down.

Regina slid a hand over her thigh, pinky barely brushing the hem at her crotch. "I love watching you take charge," she whispered huskily.

"Thought that was your job," Emma baited her just to see where it would go. Regina scooted to the very edge and spread her knees wide. Emma's eyes shot open when she guided her hand beneath her skirt. Moving her panties to the side, she pushed Emma's knuckles into the abundance of liquid that had surely stained her skirt by that point. "I've been squirming since you decided to play your little game with the water."

Emma retracted her hand without releasing Regina's and pushed the woman down on the sofa, arms above her head. Regina hummed as her wife's weight pressed on her hips. "You almost lost it with your little magic stunt."

Regina smirked and arched her back, rubbing their breasts together. "This one?" She wiggled her fingers and sent the same softly vibrating pulse to Emma's clit. The Savior ground against her, seeking pressure where she most needed it.

"Fuck you," she seethed into Regina's ear and then caught the tip of the lobe between her teeth, pinching it painfully. Regina rocked up to meet her and stifled a moan in Emma's neck.

"Uhh," an unfamiliar voice stuttered from the foyer.

"Hey, you're here," Katy called from further away, and Emma and Regina scrambled to straighten themselves before their child caught them in a compromising position.

They glanced up to find the young wolf staring with an open mouth, clearly more shocked and intrigued than embarrassed or disgusted. She tore her eyes from them when Katy appeared at her shoulder and pulled the warrior into a hug with one arm. Batch extended a note to Katy without removing her hand from her shoulder, enjoying the physical contact as much as Katy if the way she leaned into the wolf indicated anything. She looked like a normal teenage girl for that one perfect moment.

Katy read the note and then stepped into the living room. "Is it okay if Batch stays with me tonight?" She asked hopefully.

Emma cleared her throat. "Sure, that's fine." If it meant that she and Regina missed the angry sex they both craved, then so be it. Katy made a friend who seemed to be solid if a bit frayed around the edges. She rarely spoke, so that worked for Katy, too. On the darker side of this friendship, Batch possessed supernatural wolf strength, so if anyone tried anything suggested in those texts or online posts, she'd be strong enough to assist their warrior in defending herself.

Katy grinned happily and practically skipped back to the wolf. "Eva waiting outside for an answer?" Batch nodded. "Great. I'll show you the doorbell on the way back. In this world, we knock or ring before going into someone's house." She tapered off as they disappeared into the foyer, and Emma flashed Regina that award-winning Savior smile.

"Katy made a friend," she murmured quietly and took Regina's hand, lacing their fingers together. The Queen stiffened at the affectionate contact.

"Perhaps I should leave after the movie," Regina suggested.

"You could sleep in Ruby and Belle's room," Emma counteroffered. "Unless you plan to murder us all in our sleep in which case, I really must insist you return to the diner," she added for dramatic effect, not really sure Regina wouldn't murder her anyway.

In the blink of an eye, Regina's hand encircled her throat, sneer on her lips. "Unlike my counterpart, Ms. Swan, I do not operate under the banner of trickery and manipulation. I prefer to see the fear in the eyes of my victims as I describe exactly what intend for them."

"Good," Emma said, not a sliver of fear in her eyes or voice. "Why don't you go get snacks for the movie while I put Annabel down?"

"As you wish," Regina conceded easily and released her throat, not hesitating one second before sauntering towards the kitchen.

Emma released a ragged breath and dropped her head into her hands, leaning elbows on her knees. She had no idea how they'd arrived at this place, but she liked it, yearned for more of it. It felt good to not worry about Regina's feelings, about hurting her despite how much the other woman had ripped her to shreds. Maybe this was required for them to heal. Nothing else seemed effective, but this… acknowledging their intense sexual desire while putting emotions aside, that felt good, and for the moment, that was enough for Emma.

Not to mention, they totally rocked motherhood that night, and Emma wanted to celebrate that.


	36. Who Are You, Emma Swan?

Thank you so much for the reviews and follows. I do, indeed, have a plan for these ladies. They are far too messed up to try and wing it like RB. Haha.

Enjoy!

Song: Glass by Thompson Square

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><p>Emma thrummed her fingers on her stomach and stared at the ceiling. Time passed, but she acknowledge it very little, no mind games of "If I go to sleep now, I can get this many hours." Belle's words replayed over and over in her mind, and she grasped at tendrils of answers to the questions the insightful woman presented without actually gaining a firm hold. Her heart told her one thing, her mind something else, her body a whole different realm. She'd never denied a sexual attraction to Regina, but sex wouldn't fix anything, would it?<p>

Huffing in frustration, Emma rolled out of bed and dropped to the floor to start a frantic regimen of push-ups, hoping that exhausting her body quieted her mind. She thought briefly of putting some shorts and a bra on, but exertion kicked in soon enough without a full-on cardio. Sweat beaded on her forehead and lower back and her arms quivered and burned, but her mind still raced from thought to thought in a hectic relay race. Reaching her limit, she rolled onto her back and tucked her hands beneath her lower spine, raising her legs to work her lower abs in an isometric frenzy.

The Queen obviously wanted to be there, wanted her, wanted their family. She possessed the strength required to fix it but lacked the love required to make it whole again. How frustrating to want something she wasn't capable of feeling. _I'm strong enough to endure your wrath, Emma._

Was Emma that angry?

"Yes," she answered out loud. She was mad at her parents for abandoning her again and Belle and Ruby for being so fucking perfect and herself for becoming a person who just took it all out of fear that she'd be abandoned again if she didn't. It's why she'd spent most of her life alone. No one left her if she never allowed herself to love them. They just became faces in her life, experiences to learn from and then move on to something else.

And Regina.

That woman infuriated her most of all. She loathed the fact that Regina knew her so well. She hated herself for needing her, in spite of all everything, she fucking needed the woman who had taken a part of her mind. What was the difference between love and codependency? What they shared couldn't have been healthy, could it? Regina said they'd been happy, as happy as Ruby and Belle were now that they'd finally figured out how to be individuals in a partnership.

Emma's legs fell to the floor with a _thump._ She pushed to her feet and wandered into the bathroom for a drink of water. She brought a cupped hand to her mouth and then splashed her heated face without wiping the droplets. Green eyes stared at her from the mirror, but Emma failed to recognize them. The identity beyond those haunted, stormy eyes emerged so clearly in the past. The scars had blazed proudly, a wildfire that destroyed every bridge she crossed, every heart she ever held in her hands. Somewhere in her journey, that destructive force failed to protect her heart. Now, the jagged edges of her soul struggled for reconnection without enough embers to seer the ripped flesh together. When had she become someone who required another human being to fix her broken heart?

Disgusted, she turned away and flopped onto the bed to resume her staring contest with the ceiling. She sat up almost immediately and grabbed her phone, dialing the number she never dreamed of dialing in her life at this hour. Ruby's greeting was raspy and groggy but alert and concerned all at the same time. Emma pinched the bridge of her nose, trying to stave the tears.

"Rubes, I don't know what to do," Emma confessed and then gave up on fighting the tears.

"What's wrong? Did something happen?" Ruby asked, the sliver of fear evident in her voice as well as rustling of blankets and Belle's sleepy murmur in the background.

"No, everything's fine. I just can't sleep and I feel like I'm losing my mind," Emma quickly assured her. Ruby said something to Belle, and then more telltale signs of her moving around filtered through the phone, a door closing.

"Talk to me," Ruby said, finally finding a place to talk where she'd not disturb her partner and child, probably on the steps leading to the balcony of the library. At least that's what Emma imagined.

"I don't even really know what to say," Emma realized, feeling stupid. "I'm sorry that I woke you up, I just…"

"Hey, it's all good. I told you that we're here for you, and if you just need me to sit on the phone and listen to you breathe right now, then I'm here. 'Kay?" Ruby, big-hearted, loyal Ruby.

Emma bowed her head and released more tears. "Thanks, Rubes."

"Sure." Silence. "So, I was thinking about your tattoo. We can't just leave it an empty chain, that's boring and makes no sense. Want to try and finish it sometime this week?"

Emma snorted. "Why did you let Young Emma tattoo my body?"

Ruby answered with a laugh, and Emma actually smiled but it faded quickly. "I guess it doesn't make much sense to get Regina's name over my heart anymore, does it?"

"I don't know. It looked like you and The Queen were getting pretty comfortable at dinner," Ruby delve into the deeper reason behind the late night call. "Want to talk about that?"

"I don't know what to say. I'm not even really sure what the hell is happening. It just… is." Emma sighed and leaned against the headboard, already feeling more grounded. They had the best friends in the world, and it felt weird not to have them down the hallway anymore. They knew Belle and Ruby intended to move eventually, but shit kept coming up. First the heart swap and then the Jacob/Ben situation and then the body swap and now this mess.

"Emma, Belle wouldn't really talk about it beyond telling me what happened between you and Regina while we had Katy and Henry, but I think I've put it together anyway. If you need to take some time to figure out who you are without your memories of Regina, I'll help you however I can," Ruby offered graciously and then added levity to the moment. "Plus, you two aren't really that discreet with a wolf around. Regina's lasagna only goes so far in masking _that _scent."

Emma chuckled. "I remember. God, how can you function with Belle puking as much as she has been? That must be hell on your senses."

Ruby sighed on the other end and then laughed. "Because I know how happy she is," she answered honestly, sincerely. "It's amazing what you can endure in the name of love. You and Regina taught me that, ya know?"

"What?" Emma blurted, flabbergasted.

"Ems, I know you don't have specific memories of her, but… if you look hard enough, you can piece it all together. Do you remember Neverland?"

"Yeah."

"Everything that happened in Neverland, everything you did and went through, you did it for her. You stayed behind for me, not because we were friends at that point and certainly not because I had done anything that warranted that amount of devotion. You stayed because you knew how devastated she'd have been if she lost me as a friend." Emma listened intently, and Ruby paused, giving her the chance to speak. She didn't.

"When you asked Amelia to teach you how to harness the dark magic in Regina's heart, you did it because she asked you to. She was afraid that Zelena would kill Annabel, and you sacrificed yourself for your family, for her. I know you don't remember it, but she took really good care of you after that. She was patient and understanding and gave you the space you needed in order to accept who you were before she married you.

"And when you lost your memories after the accident, Emma, I've never seen a woman so utterly destroyed. I've been thinking about that a lot since I talked to Amelia. No one gave her wellbeing a second thought because the two of you have this miraculous ability to overcome anything, and I still believe in that, but we are all to blame for Regina's condition. I still believe in the power of your love, Emma, and if you need to explore that with The Evil Queen… Sorry, The Queen." Emma smiled at the clarification. Dark, yes. Evil, not so much. Ruby apparently drew some sort of conclusion about that, too.

"If you need to explore that with her now, then that's what you need to do. Obviously, I don't want to be on the receiving end of your anger, so you should probably check that before touching another coffee cup, but you've struggled with Regina's dark side since you carried her heart. Not because she possesses it, you've always been pretty accepting of her. But, carrying darkness like that had to have done something to you, even if you do have the right heart now. It's okay to not be The Savior for a little while."

Emma covered her mouth, catching the whimpering sob, but she suspected Ruby heard it anyway with those damn wolf ears. Ruby allowed the silence to stretch for a few seconds, granting Emma time to reign in her emotions or go straight for a breakdown.

"Emma?"

"I'm here," she said forced around the constriction in her throat.

"Am I helping or making it worse?" Ruby asked, her insecurity poking through. Same old Ruby.

"You're giving me a lot to think about, but it's not a bad thing," Emma told her honestly. "I never thought about it like that before, the memories, I mean. I know exactly which moments involved her directly because they don't make any sense. It's like piecing together a dream."

"I know it's cold comfort, but give it some time, things will get clearer," Ruby offered the last of the wisdom she possessed at 2:37 in the morning.

"I know. Thanks, Rubes." Emma wiped at her tears, calmer and sleepier than she'd been all evening since they'd said goodnight and parted ways to sleep in separate rooms. "It's just hard to need her so much while hating her so much."

"Which one do you need to address first? The need or the anger?" It was a simple question, really. One that left Emma completely stunned and flustered all over again.

"I don't think I can do this without her," Emma admitted more to herself than to Ruby.

"Then you need to tell her that, not me," Ruby pushed now that Emma landed on solid ground. "I saw her tonight, Emma. Trust me, she needs to hear it." A long silence followed, and Ruby searched for the words. What had she needed to hear when she struggled to accept how much Belle changed her? Nothing felt scarier than giving her heart to someone else, to trust her to cherish it and cradle the fragile thing gently. "Emma, it's okay to need someone. She needs you, too, or The Queen never would have played whatever game you created with the glass of water."

Emma laughed out loud at that. "Was it that obvious?"

Ruby smiled at the glorious sound. "Not particularly, but I noticed the changes in her vocal patterns every time you took a drink. Not to mention, wolf nose. I knew something was up the second you walked in the door." Ruby smiled a little at that. She wanted her friends to feel the way she and Belle felt. Maybe it's how they'd felt in Salem, no fear, no doubts, no hesitation. Just a melding of two souls with a look, an innocent touch, a word, watching the other play with Alex.

"Thanks, Rubes," Emma repeated, running out of words as her thoughts took over. Still racing, the fear of them dissipated in the comfort of a trusted friend. Maybe their friendships with Ruby and Belle – hell, even Eva, Lauren, and Amelia – reflected their own relationships. No matter the test, they passed it, even if it took a few tries. "Think you'll be able to get back to bed?"

Ruby chuckled, "If Belle hasn't drenched my pillow in drool and doesn't have to get up and puke, sure. You good?"

Emma grinned at that. "I'm good."

"Okay, feel free to call if you need anything else. Night," the wolf said in parting, already sounding half asleep again now that the crisis ended.

"Night," Emma murmured and ended the call. She stared at the phone for a while, long after the screen returned to black and faintly reflected her face in the dim light.

Before she thought too hard, Emma snagged the baby monitor from the bedside table and left the room that haunted her with the memories lost to her. She checked in on Annabel first and then Henry before silently moving downstairs. She chuckled lightly to find Batch and Katy asleep on the living room floor with blankets, pillows, and DVD cases everywhere. The young wolf had never watched a movie before that evening, and Emma never witnessed anyone so excited by the smallest things. Maybe the first movie to start her on shouldn't have been one as action-packed as The Avengers. She'd carried on excitedly with Katy and Henry the entire time, practically jumping on the sofa by the end, and quickly grabbed Katy's hand and pointed at the DVD collection in the cabinet beneath the flat screen hanging on the wall. Katy happily explained the concept of each movie when Batch sadly pointed to the text and shook her head. She couldn't read, which only deepened the mystery of what the girl had gone through as a child.

Now, the two teens slumbered next to one another while the start screen to Harry Potter repeated. She left it, figuring any movement within the perimeter of the living room would have woken Katy. She observed them a moment longer, smile growing. Tears burned her eyes when she noticed their tightly clasped hands between their chests, though their bodies remained a good foot or so apart. They slept on their sides, facing each other and giving the illusion that one of them had been speaking quietly when they'd fallen asleep. Who comforted whom remained unclear, but just the act of lying beside another warm body and feeling safe provided the best solace.

With a sigh, Emma climbed the stairs to the room Ruby and Belle had lived in for the past couple years. Without knocking, she turned the knob, happy to find it unlocked and slipped inside. Startled but not surprised, she found Regina staring out the window, arms crossed and hands squeezing her biceps in a self-comforting gesture. They stared at each other for a long moment before Emma finally broke the silence.

"Which one of you have I got?" She asked, fiddling with the phone and monitor in her hand.

Regina smiled kindly. "Just me, Darling," she answered and then presented a few light blue sparks to solidify her words. Anger flared in Emma's heart, shocking her with the knowledge that she'd wanted The Queen.

"Will you heal her… your face?" Emma asked. She wanted Regina's pain to be over, a bit selfishly since she'd caused it, but she also imagined the amount of pain the giant bruise and small cut caused. Regina closed her eyes, concentrating, and waved a hand over her cheek. A small gasp and a flash of blue magic, and the throbbing synced with her pulse dissipated.

"Let her out," she said softly.

Regina nodded, understanding and shameful. No pleas or excuses fell from her lips. The memory of Emma's eyes as her darker half finally laid everything on the table before her burned sharply in her heart. She bowed her head, and slowly her arms fell to a more neutral position to mark the arrival of The Queen. Regina allowed it to happen so easily that time, perhaps to avoid the conflict of discussing her betrayal.

"Am I to assume you've changed your mind about our evening of pleasure?" She asked lasciviously, teeth glinting in the light of the waning moon.

"No. That's not going to happen, not tonight anyway. I just… I can't sleep," Emma explained without elaboration.

"So, you've come to what? Talk? Retrieve stolen moments in the dead of night?" Regina picked at her, pushing her, challenging her. Emma smiled, realizing that she'd caught Regina off guard.

"I thought maybe you'd let me lay beside you, see if I could drift off." She kept her tone as neutral as possible and her heart steady. Regina might have said no, and she wanted to keep the disappointment to a minimum. It was okay to need someone, she reminded herself, remembering Ruby's words.

"For what purpose?" Regina snapped. "This bed is far less comfortable than the one you left."

Emma rolled her eyes and leaned a shoulder against the door. "I don't feel as confused when you're around." That shut her up. The Queen narrowed her eyes, staring long and hard at Emma until The Savior squirmed under the scrutiny.

"I don't cuddle," Regina snapped but moved towards the bed anyway.

It wasn't their bed. This ground remained impartial. Just two women seeking solace in the presence of another. Emma happily slipped between the sheets, set her phone and the baby monitor on the side table, and settled down. The scent of shampoo on the pillow told her that she ended up on Belle's side, another comfort. Belle hadn't just come home, she'd come home a whole person. She'd missed her.

On her back, Emma reached for Regina's hand and hooked her forefinger around the sorceress' thumb. "Night, Regina," she mumbled.

Regina allowed it and settled on her side, dark eyes studying Emma's exhausted face. Her breathing evened out gradually and the lines around her eyes and mouth recede slowly as sleep claimed Emma within a few minutes of the amiable silence. Not her. The Queen rarely slept. Regina perhaps, might have slumbered in the presence of this resilient spirit, but not her, and Emma had specifically asked for her. The mother of her children required protection but lacked the ability to ask for it, so she'd chosen The Queen as her shield against the harshness of the dark and her racing thoughts. Emma needed to be taken care of by the part of her that shied away from the softer and gentler emotions. Neither of them were prepared to deal with those yet, but this… this worked. A partnership, not a relationship or a marriage. They cared for their children and each other without succumbing to those fickle ideals of True Love. Those things led to the anger from which they needed respite, they just needed to breathe and cope with the deeper fissures they'd caused in the other's heart and soul later, once they found solid ground again.

The Queen gave this freely and without judgment or expectation.

Regina tugged at Emma's finger lightly, but the blonde never moved or cracked an eyelid. With painstaking precision and control, Regina moved her body an inch at a time until her stomach pressed against Emma's side. Like a rooting puppy, Emma rolled towards the warm body in her sleep and burrowed into Regina's chest, head tucked securely beneath the other woman's chin.

The sudden affection paralyzed Regina, and it took several moments before she pushed old air out of her lungs and pulled in fresh. Unsure, she touched blonde hair lightly and then cupped the back of her head with the arm beneath Emma's neck, the other hand resting on her ribs.

"I will fight for you, Savior," she whispered into the stillness of the room and settled in for a long night of staring at the wall while Emma's breath puffed against her chest.


	37. Sort of Evil

Thank you for the reviews! I really love getting them. Another shout out to my girl Pixip53 because she's awesome and somehow manages to keep up with my manic mind flawlessly.

Enjoy, my pretties! *hops about happily*

Songs: My Madilyn Bailey Pandora station, so all over the place because there is a lot packed in here. But, I decided during this chapter that Batch's song will be I Was Here by Beyoncé, so enjoy that.

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><p>Emma woke alone to damnable birds chirping outside the window and the sun blinding her from the East-facing window. This very reason signified their continued desire for the master bedroom. She and Regina hated mornings. Despite the harsh awakening, she finally felt rested in her body and her mind, perhaps her karmic reward for being so nice to Regina the previous night. Blinking slowly, she glanced around the room for any sign of Regina. Finding none, she checked the table for the monitor, finding only her phone. A shot of panic tore through her, and she forced a deep breath into her lungs. She trusted Regina with the kids, right?<p>

With shaking hands, she checked her phone, forcing herself to go through her normal waking up routine when Annabel wasn't screaming for breakfast or something cold against her gums. She found two texts waiting, one from Ruby and the other from Regina. She checked Regina's first.

_Breakfast is waiting. _The time stamp told Emma that she'd sent it a few minutes prior. Must have been what pulled her completely from the comfy place between sleep and reality. A smile spread without her permission, and no amount of berating from the smarter half of her brain diminished it.

"Damn it, Swan," she cursed aloud and pulled up Ruby's text message.

_Hey, yo! 1) you okay? You sounded pretty out of it last night. 2) I need you to go across the line with me to get something. Belle knows._

_The fuck you need to cross the line for?_ Emma tapped out instantly and forced herself out of bed. This felt worthy of rising and shining, a worthy cause that wasn't Regina's amazing cooking.

_Jack and I finally figured out what to do about the wolves, and we need to get equipment. Just trust me. This is great. _

_What are we getting?_

_If Belle doesn't know yet, I'm sure as hell not telling you. It's a surprise, and I need your help. You in?_

_Fine. Breakfast first. Come get me in an hour or so. Belle can stay with Regina and the kids today. _Emma pushed down the instant and gut-clenching worry. Regina had done beautifully with the kids the past couple days. They'd be fine, right?

Checking the balcony, Emma crossed to her room to find more clothes than boy shorts and a sheer white tank top. She threw on the first pair of jeans and bra she found and then pulled the tank back on.

_Cool. Stacy and I are just finalizing everything now, so I'll be over in bit. _What the hell had Ruby done?

Curious but not aching, Emma left it for the moment and stumbled down the stairs. Her boot slipped, and she cursed her sore arms as she caught herself on the rail and then glanced around to see who had seen. No one. One of those mornings, uncoordinated as hell. She chuckled at herself and made her way to the kitchen. Chaos greeted her in the usually clean and orderly room.

Henry tossed a toothy grin at her as she entered. "Mom taught us how to make eggs benedict. I made the biscuits," he announced proudly, and Emma smiled.

"You guys on the patio?" He nodded. "Meet you out there. Can't wait to try it." She kissed the side of his head, and he grabbed the jug of milk that he'd come after and heralded her arrival as he slipped out the back door.

Emma rubbed her eyes with a thumb and forefinger, waking herself up for the assault of stimulation before coffee. Filling a cup of coffee and a glass of water, she took a deep breath and faced the day with a smile. A round of excited "mornings" greeted her, and she felt all of the morning grumps leave her. This. She needed this.

"Good morning, Savior," Regina said smoothly, her deep voice sounding happy. Emma sat her drinks on the glass table and then surprised the shit out of everyone when she rounded the chairs with calculated steps, buried her fingers in Regina's dark hair, and leaned over for a slow good morning kiss.

"Good morning, your majesty," she whispered and then dipped further and kissed the tiny girl in Regina's lap with applesauce on her chin. She smelled the sunblock on the infant's skin, safe and comfortable in the bright morning, and grinned. Yeah, she liked this. So did her kids.

She sat across from Regina and took a sip of coffee before digging in. She cracked a biscuit on her plate. "So who made what?" She asked generally and shared a grin with Regina when a cacophony of voices coming from only two people exploded on the patio.

"I made the biscuits," Henry proudly announced again.

"I made the Hollandaise sauce and the eggs," Katy offered. Batch grinned bashfully at her friend and nudged her shoulder. "Batch made the apples and cinnamon." The girl nodded happily, obviously just as proud as the other two, and Emma's heart reached to orphaned wolf.

"I fried the bacon and ham," Regina supplied as Emma finished drizzling the yellow sauce over her biscuit, egg, and bacon combination.

"Did I put this together right?" Emma asked glancing around the table. Regina nodded and offered another bite of apple sauce to her youngest. Emma dipped some of the apples onto her plate and stabbed one with her fork, tasting it first. "Oh my god, why don't we make this for breakfast more often?" Batch beamed even as she bowed her head at the praise, and Emma smiled discreetly at Katy who seemed grateful that she'd taken the time to acknowledge her friend's need to belong. It wasn't necessarily for their benefit as Emma continued producing yummy noises and took a second serving of everything.

"I'll make a crisp for dinner if you'd like," Regina offered, and everyone looked at Emma expectantly. Ah, they wanted her approval for Regina's presence at dinner.

"If Belle and Ruby don't stay, sure. I don't want to make Belle sick with cinnamon," Emma agreed easily. She loved having this Regina around. Plus, her cooking far surpassed hers and Belle's and rivaled Ruby's on a mastery level, but only because of Ruby's wolf senses.

"They won't. They've finally purchased their house," Regina informed her, and Emma froze with the fork on her tongue. Regina shrugged. "The bookworm and the princess text."

"She know what Ruby's plans are for the wolves? Ruby texted me this morning," Emma carried on as though not a bad moment had passed in their relationship. Regina took a bite of her egg combination and shook her head.

Batch perked up and looked ready to say something, maybe ask for an elaboration. "Jack," she said forcefully. An anger they'd never seen on the girl danced in her eyes.

"Jack is on board, Batch," Emma assured her and almost offered to show her the text, remembered that she couldn't read, and sighed. "He and Ruby aren't going to let anything happen to you, okay?"

Batch shook her head in frustration. "No," she said, obviously trying to say something else.

"Hey," Katy said and touched her shoulder, squeezing lightly. "It's okay. We just need a verb here. Jack, what?" Batch met her gaze in confusion, grateful for the patience and obviously trusting Katy more than the rest of them but still unsure what Katy asked.

"You know, an action verb? Jack ran. Jack is… that sort of thing?" Katy elaborated without sounding condescending.

"Jack," she pointed at her fork, indicating that the utensil indicated the man in question. Katy nodded, picking up her cues easily. Maybe they'd done it before. "Ru-bay," she pointed to the salt shaker. Katy's brow furrowed but she nodded again. Batch held both of them up at the same height and then moved them in a slow circular motion until the salt shaker towered over the fork.

"Jack considers Ruby his alpha?" Katy asked, unsure of what she said. Batch nodded enthusiastically. Batch held up the fork and waved it emphatically, and then touched her chest above her heart? "Love?" Batch nodded. "Jack loves Ruby."

Batch paused, nodded, and then tapped her chest again. "Me," she said and nodded, willing Katy to understand.

"Jack loves you?" Katy asked, and Batch nodded and then held up the salt shaker. "Ruby," Katy followed. Batch touched it to her chest. "Ruby loves you?" Batch shook her head, held up the salt shaker, and touched the fork to her heart. "Jack loves you like a daughter?" Batch nodded.

"Are you Ruby's sister?" Emma piped up, too shocked for propriety. Batch shook her head sadly like she wanted that to be true.

She opened her mouth, closed it, huffed in frustration. "Stay with Low-ran," she said.

"You don't want to go back to the cave because Jack loves you like a daughter?" Katy asked. Batch nodded sadly, and everyone stared at the teen in confusion. She held up her finger and then stood, presented her back to them, and raised her shirt. A very old scar mangled her shoulder. Katy jumped up and wrapped the girl in a fierce hug, coming to a conclusion about something.

"You weren't born a wolf," she whined, hurting with her new friend. "Jack turned you because you reminded him of Ruby." Batch nodded into her neck and fisted the back of her shirt tightly.

Regina and Emma glanced at each other, not a bit surprised to find the other with a hand over her mouth in a gesture of shock or perhaps disgust. Ruby had just found solid ground with her previously estranged father, but no one wanted to say it aloud. He'd obviously traumatized the girl, even if he had taken her in as he should have. What the hell happened to her?

"How old were you when he bit you?" Katy asked without releasing her.

"Al-ex," Batch said.

"You were about Alex's age?" Batch nodded. "But wolves don't change until they're 13, right?" She looked at her mothers who nodded a confirmation. Batch released her and returned to her seat. She'd not dissolved into tears as they'd thought. She picked up the salt shaker and slammed it on top of the fork and then glanced around for them, no explanation required of exactly what she wanted Ruby to do. Take Jack's alpha status.

"No cave," she declared. "Ru-bay." Her chin tipped upward a bit as she hit her chest, showing her strength and pride.

Katy smiled and wrapped an arm around Batch's shoulders as she sat. "I think all wolves should live like Ruby, too," she agreed, and Batch grinned at her with a brightness in her eyes that she sometimes got when someone really understood her. She then turned those bright eyes to the two adults too stunned to comment on the new knowledge, glancing between them to spark some sort of response.

"Batch, if you don't want to go back to Jack, we'll make sure you don't have to," Emma promised, putting her anger aside to comfort the anxious teen.

Batch gave one sharp nod of acknowledgement. She reached for another biscuit, retracted her hand, and looked at them again. Wolves had huge appetites. If a normal person consumed 2,000 calories without any intense exercises, a wolf easily consumed at least twice that. They required a lot more energy to maintain their strength and senses.

"Eat as much as you'd like, Sweetheart," Regina said and touched her arm. Batch smiled and reached for the biscuit again. "Are there more wolves who feel this way?" Batch nodded, brow furrowed in confusion. "Are their wolves who are unwavering in their loyalty to Jack?" Batch thought about the question for a moment and then nodded slowly.

Regina's eyes jumped to Emma's. Ruby was about to get herself into an alpha power struggle whether Jack stood united with her or not.

"She knows what she up against, guys," Katy assured them. "It's why she's working with Jack instead of just dethroning him even though he should have gotten off his ass and done something ages ago," Katy snapped harshly, her respect for Jack falling quickly.

Batch touched her arm and shook her head, confusing all of them. "Jack good. No cave."

"Exactly," Ruby's voice called behind them as she entered the patio from the kitchen like she owned the place. She leaned over and snagged a piece of bacon and shoved it in her mouth cheekily. Her eyes went wide and she whipped around inhumanly. "Belle, don't…"

"Bloody cinnamon-mongers," an accented voice cursed them from the kitchen, followed by the sound of her chucks slapping on hardwood.

Ruby winced and then turned back to them with a look that said 'save me' on her face. "I'm so used to being overloaded by cinnamon that I don't even smell it anymore sometimes."

"Where's Alex?" Katy asked, just now noticing the girl's absence.

Ruby shrugged and squeezed between Emma and Katy on the bench and fixed a huge ham biscuit. "At Granny's. We had breakfast with her this morning, and Alex couldn't bear the thought of being parted with her today." She chomped into the biscuit and hummed.

"I made the biscuits," Henry said, much more subdued than the first few times he'd said it.

Ruby grinned at him, her jaws puffing out like a chipmunk. Batch and Henry laughed at her while Katy rolled her eyes with a grin on her lips. Ruby swallowed roughly and snagged Emma's coffee, taking a big swig. "You about ready to go? I don't want to leave my heart in Belle's chest any longer than necessary. Her body is already making two wolves."

"Emma?" Regina sat straighter, coiling with tension.

"Uhh, Rubes needs my help. I'll be back later. Belle is going to hang with you guys today. Could you call the principal and get Katy's exam times set up and take care of that other thing she asked for last night?" Emma handed the reins to The Queen easily who looked more than a little shocked. Emma grinned. Life seemed easier when they focused on the kids.

"Absolutely," Regina accepted responsibility with enthusiasm, and Emma smiled.

"Great. Let's go. Belle wants to clean our house tonight," Ruby subtly slipped her new title of homeowner into the conversation. Everyone reacted with bittersweet excitement.

"How do you feel?" Emma asked, and Ruby shrugged while taking another hunk out of the sandwich. The bright gleam in her eyes said everything, though. Scared and unbelievably happy.

"Where is it?" Regina asked. "I'm certain we'll be requested to assist with the task." The kids and Emma groaned, knowing it to be the truth.

Ruby grinned wider and swallowed. "Across the street. Alex is so used to being here that we thought it'd be best to keep her close. Not to mention, I'd feel better with two biggest badasses in Storybrooke as neighbors, given recent circumstances," Ruby added in a light tone, sparing Katy's feelings. The girl looked positively dashed anyway. Ruby bumped her shoulder amiably.

"We're still kicking, kid. Plus, Alex starts preschool this fall, and I like knowing she's got a good babysitter who can ride the bus with her while Belle and I are at work," Ruby tossed out the responsibility as if it were nothing to her at all to trust Katy implicitly, and the teen lit up.

"I can do that," she promised, taking the responsibility in stride. Of course, Regina would still be unemployed at that point and loved the kid like one of her own, but giving the task specifically to Katy offered the girl that chance to feel like she actually did something to make up for her past mistakes.

"Great because I'm going to be huge in a few months," Belle's raspy, unenthusiastic voice called from the yard. They glanced over the rail to find her on the bench, keeping a safe distance from the cinnamon-infused apples and the kitchen. "If you feed my daughter cinnamon, however, I shall curse you all."

"Mom, can we go to the youth center after we clean up?" Katy directed towards Regina. "It was supposed to open by the start of summer, but we missed it. I want to get everything ready by the end of June."

"Of course, Sweetheart. Start clearing the dishes and load the washer. Henry leftovers. Put them in baggies. Aunt Ruby and your mother can take them on their trip," Regina instructed the kids. Batch looked at her expectantly, wanting a chore, too. Regina grinned. "Batch, would you mind cleaning the kitchen? We made a terrible mess this morning." The wolf nodded happily and followed the other two inside with full hands.

Ruby wandered off the deck to check on Belle, and Emma sipped what coffee Ruby left her, unable to hide her grin. "You doing okay?" She asked, and Regina released a tense sigh.

"I think I've more than earned my prize," she answered, her sultry tone sliding straight into Emma's stomach and igniting a slow burn there.

"Tonight," she promised. "We'll send the kids to help Belle and Ruby and give us an hour or two to ourselves." The plot sounded solid, and the devilish look Ruby tossed in their direction told them all they needed to know. Their friends had their backs, even for kinky slightly evil Savior and Queen sex.

"I'd like your word in writing, Savior," Regina challenged the promise. Emma grinned and took a big gulp of the water previously untouched, and The Queen licked her lips.

"Thanks for last night," Emma said almost sheepishly, embarrassed that she'd gone to Regina of all people for comfort.

"I survived," Regina clipped, sounding more annoyed than she actually was. Emma smiled at her. She'd enjoyed the physical closeness more than she cared to admit, and decided that she never would. "I'll ensure that Henry and Belle continue mending their relationship," she changed the subject to the one they always felt comfortable discuss, their kids.

Emma nodded. "That's good. She made a big impact yesterday at the skating rink." Regina nodded, having heard all about it while they prepared dinner.

Emma scooted until she sat beside Regina, straddling the bench to keep a bit of distance while touching Regina's knee with her own. "Do you think I should talk to Ruby about what Batch said?" They both glanced towards the wolf they loved like a sister.

"She's only just begun to reconcile with her father. Perhaps, it would be prudent to refrain until they've settled the wolves," Regina suggested and leaned over to place Annabel into her play pen. The tiny thing immediately grabbed her keys and stuck them into her mouth.

When she turned around, she swung one leg over the bench and scooted forward. Emma's eyes darkened with desire as she levered herself on her hands and moved forward until her legs encircled Emma's hips over her thighs. The Savior grabbed her hips, fingers digging into flesh through the black silk pajama bottoms. Regina responded with a hum, wrapped her arms around Emma's neck, and started a slow, barely noticeable rock in her hips. The position and the motion put pressure on her entrance and wet nether lips but not enough leverage to touch her clit.

"How long do you intend to play your game with the water, Dear?" She asked against the shell of Emma's ear, and The Savior shuddered.

"Why? You like it?" Emma returned, unable to stop her hands from slipping beneath the silk top to squeeze and caress Regina's waist and ribs, brush the underside of her breasts.

Regina gasped at the added stimulation and nipped Emma's jaw as she pulled back to catch hazy green eyes. "Perhaps we should raise the stakes. If you reach the end of your glass, I must submit to you for an entire evening, or a time of your choosing if you wish to prepare for the encounter. A proper punishment."

Nails pressed into her ribs, and Regina smirked lasciviously. "Am I to assume you agree to the new terms of our arrangement?"

"Somehow I don't see The Queen submitting to anyone, not even me," Emma laid her counterargument at Regina's feet.

Hands glided over Emma's sculpted collarbones. Dark eyes held stormy green as they dropped lower and cupped Emma's breasts. A harsh sigh tore from Emma's throat at the first hint of gentle pressure. Nipples strained against her cotton bra, and Regina maneuvered her hands to brush her thumbs over them teasingly.

"Regina, the kids," Emma protested without any real conviction.

Regina leaned forward without moving her hands and pressed her cheek to Emma's. "Even though the wolf and bookworm may see what a good girl you are at any moment?" Emma's hips searched for friction without her permission, and Regina chuckled darkly in her ear. "Do you want them to watch me make you beg, Savior?"

"Regina," Emma moaned, confused by the image of her friends observing Regina riding her face. She'd never even thought about exhibitionism until Regina mentioned in the previous night. Now, it repeated in her head.

"I'd like Amelia to watch what a slut you are for your queen," Regina rumbled directly into her ear, not one trace of shame at her jealousy. "Would you like that, Savior?"

Emma nodded, her mouth suddenly too dry to speak. All the moisture in her body dove towards her pussy at once, and she felt helpless to the urges this part of Regina evoked. Her body spoke and granted respite to her heart and mind. Emma loved it.

"I'd love to fuck your tight ass, Savior," Regina continued, and Emma leaned forward to hide her burning face in The Queen's neck.

"I've n-never…" Emma stuttered.

Regina hummed, vibrating Emma's forehead with the sound. "Mine," she possessed the aforementioned territory. Emma gasped, slightly scared and turned on by the possessiveness in Regina's voice.

"Fuck," she muttered.

Regina glanced around. The children worked in the kitchen out of sight from the picnic table and their friends spoke softly to each other, probably about Ruby's trip out of town if Belle's tightened features indicated anything. Regina dropped her feet to the floor and raised Emma's legs to mirror her previous position.

"What are you doing?" Emma asked quietly into Regina's neck.

"Shhh, there are wolves about, dear," Regina reminded her and caressed her breasts again. When a hand sank to her crotch, Emma's eyes jerked up to stare hard at Ruby and Belle who obviously had fallen deep in conversation. Magic tingled against her clit, and Emma bit her forearm to keep from crying out.

"Are you watching them, Savior?" Regina asked, her eyes carefully pointed at the door, vigilant of their children's close proximity. Emma nodded, pulling roughly at the skin of her arm. Regina increased the amount of magic, and heat rose in Emma's chest and face, the bubble of pleasure expanding in her stomach. Her body shook with the exertion of holding perfectly still, and Regina smirked. She'd been so close before she'd ever touched the blonde.

"Come for me, Emma. Show them what a good girl you are," Regina encouraged against her ear and pressed the heel of her hand to her lover's crotch, adding physical stimulation to the magic. Emma's body shuddered violently, almost falling onto the floor from the force if not for Regina's steady arm around her back. She dropped her forehead to Regina's shoulder and breathed heavily, whimpering when Regina retracted the magic stimulation. She wanted more, she wanted Regina right then.

"Wear those jeans today. I want her to know what you've done as much as you do," Regina instructed, and Emma shuddered again.

"Fuck you. I'm soaked," Emma protested raggedly, and Regina chuckled.

"Wear them or I'll return to Granny's after dinner," The Queen threatened.

Emma raised her head with a hard glare in her eyes. "This is payback for the water, isn't it?"

Regina raised an eyebrow and then shoved Emma abruptly to the side. The Savior stumbled, barely catching herself before she hit the deck and then pulled to her full height on shaky legs to glare at The Queen as she sauntered towards the kitchen. Regina may have been the only woman on the planet who made baggy pajamas look sexy.

"Enjoy your trip, Savior," she tossed over her shoulder with a little wave.


End file.
